"Man, you're good." Sighed Hermione, gasping for breath.

"Only for you, baby." Ron replied.

They had just finished having wild sex, and Ron's wang was burning with joy. All of a sudden, Hermione started dancing.

"Why are you dancing?" Ron asked, failing to remember he had AIDS.

"You gave me AIDS! They are eating my VAG!"

"Yo sup?" Harry said, finally showing up. "I was busy having a threesome-WTF? Ron, you cheating slut!" Harry cried out.

"It's not how it looks!" Ron put his manthong back on.

"Since when do you wear manthongs? I thought you were a nudist!" Hermione said.

"And I thought you were a girl." Ron replied, walking away.

"Hermione!" Harry cried. "How could you do this to me? I thought we were hermaphrodite lovers forever!"

****Meanwhile*****

"Where are we?" Draco asked as they entered a dark building.

"In a gay bar." Voldemort replied.

The sign above them stated 'The Magical STD'.

" I always come here, I'm a regular." Voldemort said. "And this is where I met your father-Hey look, there he is!" Voldemort waved to Lucius.

"Father?" Draco blinked. "So THIS is where you were when you say you have business to take care of-Huh?" Draco looked at Fred, who was sitting at the bar by himself being emo.

"Hey Weasley! My father says Weasleys can't go to gay bars!"

"Shaddap, Malfoy." Fred growled and pulled Draco in for an intimate kiss.

"Eww! Cooties!" Malfoy pulled away. "Hey, you could still be useful to me…I need you to help me find MJ." Draco commanded.

Just as he said that he heard a horrible screeching of "I'LL TAKE YOU TO THE GAY BAARR!"

"Hey look," Fred pointed to the owner of the voice. "There he is. Now do I get a reward?"

Sure enough, MJ, in a corner with Sonic, surrounded by a bunch of homosexuals and transvestites.

Draco ran up to MJ, who was thrusting his wang everywhere.

"Headmaster!" He hugged MJ. But Neville jumped out from nowhere. "He's my dad!"