Not sure how I feel about the ending of this chapter lots of talking, lots of anger. Hopefully all of my lovely readers will still like it. I sense two or three more chapters before the end of this but I just want to thank everyone who has read and reviewed or subscribed so far. You guys have kept me going. Anyhoo this is for all of you.

Disclaimer: Same as always I own nothing and it makes me sad.


Chapter 7

The floor of Stark tower they had been given was too big, Natasha had never had so much space and nor had Clint, baby Rose loved it she had squealed with delight when she had been shown to her room. Their living quarters had been designed specifically for them, Tony had told them to spend some time getting used to the place that would now be their home. Clint was currently lying on a very long sofa hoisting Rose above his head as she kicked her little legs out behind her and giggled in delight. It was strange to see both her fiancé and her daughter in such a domestic situation, Maria had been right that they hadn't been very good at domestic in the past, but that was mainly because they had never had the time before.

"Do you think we can keep this up?" Natasha asked perching herself on the end of the sofa as she watched the two of them play.

Clint glanced at her with a smile on his face; "Tasha you can't already be doubting out decision, we've only been here half an hour." He chastised her as he sat up and held a giggling Rose against him; "You worried you're going to get itchy feet?" he asked recognising the look on her face.

She pulled an uneasy face and nodded slowly; "Being an assassin is all I know. Working for SHIELD was helping me to clear the red from my ledger."

He nodded, he more than anyone understood what she meant; "I thought we agreed that she cleared away all of your red." Natasha turned to look at him sadly; "We need to think about her as well Nat, she is getting bigger she'll start noticing when we're away." Natasha looked away again sighing loudly almost being unable to keep her eyes on him.

"She's already noticed. When I returned from India she wouldn't let me go, she knows that we aren't around enough." She reached out to smooth Rose's hair down the toddler giggled and reached out towards her mother.

Clint pouted as it was clear their daughter wanted to be in her mother's arms; "Always a momma's girl eh?" he said lifting her a little higher so that Natasha could hold her; he watched as the Black Widow took her daughter into her arms and smiled to himself before pulling himself up into a sitting position; "I love you." He whispered as he smiled at her, he couldn't think of anything more perfect than the sight he had currently; mother and daughter both smiling and giggling at one another.

"I didn't think it was possible to be this happy." She confided as she bounced Rose on her hip before tickling her daughter's side. It was so domestic, so normal that Clint had to pinch himself so that he could believe that this was really his life. He would soon be married to the beautiful mother of his child and together they would start a new life, one that was about protecting people rather than killing them.

"I know what you mean. This doesn't feel real, I try not to think about where we've come from." She smiled at him and nodded understanding his words; "We have to try to focus on what the future will bring us."

"You sound so cheesy." She told him with a grin before bending down slightly to kiss his nose. Of course it hadn't always been this easy, when she had realised that she had feelings for him she had tried to fight them with every fibre of her being. She even took it out on him a few times.


She couldn't love him, she couldn't have any romantic feelings for him, romantic feelings were complicated they led to dangerous situations which led to more complications. She growled to herself as she turned away from him and looked out of the small window in the safe house they were currently staying in. He had told her that keeping watch wasn't necessary but she knew she wasn't going to be able to sleep anyway so she had perched herself on the edge of the window ledge.

"If you insist on staying awake could you keep it down?" he asked opening an eye to glare at her.

She pouted at him before turning away to glare out of the window; "Sorry Hawk, didn't know you were such a light sleeper."

He chuckled to himself before sitting up; "Being a light sleeper has nothing to do with it. You were growling, mind telling me what's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" he asked stretching his arms up and smirking as she glared at him dangerously, he should know better than to call her pretty.

"None of your business Barton." She snapped back pulling a leg up against her chest on the window ledge; "Go back to sleep." She instructed hoping that he would do as he was told. She should have known that he wouldn't, he paused for a moment yawning loudly before sitting up his eyes still trained on her, Natasha had no doubt that even in the darkness his keen eyesight meant that he could see her well enough that he would know that she was giving him her best death glare.

Clint wasn't to be put off even by her most infamous glare; "Widow," he sounded serious, she knew that voice was reserved for when he wasn't joking which was rare; "I need to know what is going on in your head. If it is keeping you up at night there is a chance that it could affect you when you're working." The indignant noise that came from her throat sounded vaguely threatening and the archer tried to explain himself; "I just, I need to understand. You are always so guarded-"

"For good reason." She muttered angrily looking away from him to stare out of the window once more, there was no way she could tell him what was really on her mind, her feelings for the American sat mere feet away from her could possibly affect her judgement in the field.

He pushed himself up from the bed and walked over to her window; "You know you can trust me right?" he told her being careful to keep his gaze looking out of the window ignoring the fact that she had turned to face him, he could feel her breath fanning across his face, it took all of his self control not to capture those perfect red lips of hers little did he know that she was also fighting a similar internal battle.

She couldn't stand to look at him for too long, she couldn't even stand being this close to him; "You aren't the problem." She told him as she pushed away from the window ledge in an attempt to put some distance between them, he didn't let her get away, a hand clamped around her upper arm. Her instinctive reaction told her to break his arm and pull out the blade that she had strapped to her thigh, but she knew that that sort of reaction wasn't acceptable behaviour when faced with your own partner. Instead she pushed him away and stalked towards the door.

"If I'm not the problem, why are you running away from me?" he asked just as her fist closed around the door handle.

She didn't turn to look at him as she said; "The Black Widow never runs." She was halfway out of the door when she mumbled to herself; "It's for your own good." Of course they had come a long way since then and she had been able to see that not all feelings were a weakness to be squashed. He had ended up with a few cracked ribs while she was in denial but once they had both admitted their feelings Clint had laughed about all the damage she had done while 'running' from her feelings.


He felt guilty for faking his own death of course he did. How could he not when he knew how much it had hurt his best friend. The look of betrayal on Clint Barton's face when he had pulled his daughter from her god-father's arms had made Phil's heart jump painfully in his chest. Watching the two of them walk away from the agency had hurt him more than he cared to admit.

"You have to talk to him." Maria pushed as she walked into his office a few days after the incident.

Phil looked up and raised an eyebrow at her; "I don't have to-"

"You are the god father of their child and Natasha wants you to walk her down the aisle when they get married. You need to talk to them. You need to make this right Phil." He of course knew that she was right, but he wasn't sure how to go about it; "They're staying with Stark, see if he'll let you in, it's a good place to start."

Phil looked up at her with sad eyes, he wasn't sure if any of the Avengers would want to see him let alone forgive him; "What if none of them want to see me? Maria I've abused their trust."

Maria took a seat across from him offering him her best sympathetic smile; "I know this didn't go exactly how you wanted it to sir. But you can't let them walk away with the final word on this one. It was for the greater good and it paid off."

The senior agent nodded, he had to concede that point at least, the Avengers had been successful in their mission; "I suppose the lives saved makes it worth it," she gave him a scathing look and he smiled gently back at her; "I just remember how I felt when Clint and I thought that Tasha was dead." He paused worrying his lip slightly with his teeth; "I forgot how much it had hurt at the time, but this is worse for Clint, he has trust issues to begin with and I've just thrown any trust he had placed in me back in his face."

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself sir and go do something about this!" she snapped before getting to her feet and heading for the door; "You need to make the first move on this one."


Making the first move when you were approaching potentially deadly assassins was never easy. Phil knew how to deal with both of them when they were angry with each other but dealing with them when they were furious with him was something new. The agent had managed to convince Tony Stark to let him onto the floor where Hawkeye and Black Widow were staying, Stark had warned him that he would be liable for any damage they did to his tower during the agent's visit.

"Good luck." Stark had muttered as he bypassed the lock on their floor and allowed agent Coulson to enter so that he might fix the mess that he was partly responsible for.

He took two steps into the living area before he was faced with the barrel of a gun; "What do you want." He knew that Natasha wouldn't shoot him, but that didn't make her any less terrifying with her gun levelled at his head; "Answer quickly before you lose the ability to answer." She growled.

"Tasha." He tried and flinched slightly as her finger twitched on the trigger, too familiar; "Agent Romanoff, I came to apologise, I was an idiot. I couldn't see the damage my actions would cause and that ended up costing me a lot more than I thought was possible." He took a breath and noticed that Clint had stepped into the room holding a sleeping Rose; "I hurt you more than any of the others, Stark and the other Avengers will get over a little duplicitous actions for the greater good but lying to you was the most dangerous thing."

"You bet your ass it was dangerous." Clint muttered harshly as he stepped closer; "You saw how devastated I was when we had to plan Nat's funeral, you understood better than most how much that hurt me. How could you put me through that again?" He asked working hard to keep his voice low so as not to wake his daughter.

"I was thinking about the greater good, I know that is hardly an excuse but you," he paused and glanced at the Black Widow who still had a gun trained on him; "both of you, you must understand, you've told me often enough about the red that you have in your ledgers. I was saving lives." Natasha lowered the gun as Rose began to wake up, she moved past agent Coulson and took her daughter from Clint giving him a significant look as she went. She knew that her fiancé wanted to forgive his former handler. Rose let out a small cry of protest as she was carried out of the room.

"You think it's that easy Phil?" Clint asked narrowing his eyes dangerously; "You can just swan in here say you're sorry and everything will be okay again?" he growled taking a step closer to the only man he had ever truly trusted; "I gave you everything Phil. Every ounce of trust I had, I invested in you and you abused that trust."

Phil wants to reach out to him, he can hear in Clint's voice the betrayal that he is feeling and the guilt of it, he remembered how long and hard he had tried to break through to the young archer when he'd first arrived and the thought that he had now thrown that away for Fury was a little too tough for him to swallow; "I'm sorry. I know it isn't good enough and I know it may take weeks or even months for me to regain your trust." He paused and swallowed hard gritting his teeth for a moment before going on; "I'll do it. I'll be here every day whether you want to see me or not and I will do anything and everything in my power to get you to believe that I thought I was doing the right thing." He sighed as he saw Clint's eyes narrow once more; "When the plan was put into place you were compromised, we didn't know if we would get you back."

"Don't turn this on me." Clint spat.

Phil put his hands up in an attempt at peace; "I was making a point Clint. I didn't think about how it would affect you because I thought you might already be lost."

"Magic and monsters Clint." Natasha had reappeared at the doorway, Barton offered her a confused look, apparently she was supporting Phil now.

He looked relieved as he continued have Natasha on his side meant that he had more of a chance of winning Clint over; "If it had been different. If you'd been with us I would have told you, I could have told you. You had no affiliation to them, the other Avengers needed something to fight for-"

"So you're saying that I would just have fought Loki like a good little soldier?" Barton backed away as his former handler floundered and tried to think of a way back on track.

"Clint." Tasha's voice was full of warning, she knew what he was doing, he could see that Phil was truly sorry but he wanted a reason to still be angry with him.

"I think maybe you should come back tomorrow." Barton muttered; "And then the next day, and the next until I decide that you actually get it. That you actually see what you made me live through. Again." He pointed a finger at the door and turned and walked away.

They stood in silence for a while Natasha offered him a small half smile, it was one she had often used when she was learning to get used to new emotions, it was a smile that Clint had taught her; "You need to give him time. If it's any consolation I get it. I mean I was angry at first, but not anywhere near as angry as he is. I've not had to deal with this from SHIELD before." She took a breath and walked closer to him; "We both know that it isn't easy to find trust in this business, losing it is a hell of a lot easier than gaining it and getting it back is twice as hard so you've got to give him some time."

"So I come back tomorrow?" he asked with a lump in his throat and tears in his eyes, he would fight to revive this friendship as if his own life depended on it, because some day it might just depend on it.


A/N: Some very angry words there from Clint, hmm I wonder how long it will take for him to forgive Phil. Anyway reviews are amazing. Thank you all for reading. Chapter 8 coming soon I hope.