Author's Note: I wrote part of this chapter as a separate fic at one point but it didn't really get that good of reviews so I decided to edit it and I thought it fit in well here, let me know what you think!
The month after Sam proposed was the best month we'd had in a long time. Granted, he and Dean were pretty busy so he wasn't home as much as I would have liked, but when he was home we were so in-sync it was amazing. I was really worried that my luck would run out and I'd wind up losing him to something dark and terrifying, but for a blip in our timeline everything seemed just fine.
Looking back the best moment that month was probably two days after he proposed. Dean had left the day after, making sure to congratulate Sam and I one more time on the way out the door, I could tell he was so happy for his little brother.
That morning went basically as follows...
I woke up tucked under his lanky arms, one leg over his torso and the other parallel to his legs.
He hugged me closer and mumbled something as I reached over and brushed his hair from his face. God it was getting long...
"Sam," I murmured.
One eye peeked at me.
I smiled and he rolled over a bit.
Both eyes now shone at me. "Morning." He smiled, pulling me into his chest and kissing the top of my head.
We laid there for a while, just cuddling, until Sam grumbled something about coffee and I responded with "I'll put a pot on".
I remember Dean once told me that Sam doesn't sleep that much and is quite the morning person. But somehow my Sam isn't the same as his Sam. My Sam is snuggly and sleeps until 11. My Sam loves to lie in bed and hold me close. I partly wonder if Sam puts up a facade for me, a smiling front that's happy and cuddly, but not at all the real Sam Winchester. He tucks himself away when he's home with me, when he feels safe, when he know's Dean isn't there to see how un-tough he can be. But Dean sees the real Sam, even though Sam does his best to hide it. At least that's my theory...
"Sammy have you called your brother yet? He might be worried if he doesn't hear from you."
I hear a grumble from the other room. The smell of coffee is just starting to waft his way. I grab the phone and walk into the bedroom, tossing it onto the bed next to him. "He's supposed to be here in three hours babe, at least call him. So he knows you're awake, alive and well."
Dean always worries about Sam, and about me. He's convinced that one day he's going to come back to the house and we'll be gone. But I don't worry that much anymore. What worries me is that Dean refuses to stay the night when Sam does. He's too proud for that, and he doesn't want to interfere with his baby brother's days off. It worries me because I know Sam worries about Dean being on his own. And while I get 'cuddly Sam', I know somewhere in that brain of his there's a ton of worry I'm not seeing. I don't want him to worry, I want him to relax and have one day where he isn't being chased after and beaten up. But I know that's too much to ask for...
I force him to call Dean and when he finally does I bring him a well deserved cup of coffee. And we lie in bed and sip away at our steaming mugs until he gets up to shower.
I watch the door while he's in there. He doesn't ask me to, but I know he's uptight about leaving me alone.
It's tough, being the fiancee of a Winchester, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.
