The Only One I'll Love
"Go ahead. Have fun." Fox said through a forced smile. This was going to hurt.
"Are you sure?"
"I'm positive." He said, still feining joy, placing a hand on her shoulder.
"Thanks, Fox." And then she was gone, out the door in seconds.
Fox watched as Krystal lept into the arms of her love; a love that was not him. He watched, in pain, as her lips touched his… and then he lowered the blinds, unable to face the reality that came up to greet him.
I should be happy for her. She looks happy. That's what I wanted for her, right?
Fox slid his hands down his face, eager to swipe away the false grin.
It's not my place to be jealous. She's happy. She doesn't think of me that way.
Fox walked into the kitchen, sick to his stomach. He bee-lined for the refrigerator. Fox threw open it's door and grabbed whatever odd amount of alcohol he could. And then he sat there, drinking from each bottle, one by one, until his fur was frazzled from him tearing at it, his eyes stained red. Fox stumbled around the house for hours, unable to locate the bathroom.
"Where the….is it?!" Fox yelled into the dark corners of the living room, dazed and confused. Finally, he found his way there, let himself fall onto the toilet, and vomited.
Fox stayed this way for hours into the night, and when Krystal didn't come home, it became worse. He knew what she was doing with him. But did she know what she was doing to Fox?
Finally, Fox awoke after a short "nap", which had been induced via contact between the toilet and his head. Fox forced himself up from the floor-which was by now covered with all sorts of bodily fluids- and towards the mirror.
"Look at me…." Fox moaned, staring himself down in the mirror. It was as if the two sides of him were fighting. One had already gone completely insane, and the other was desperately hanging to sanity. It seemed to him a losing battle, like insanity would inevitably devour him. He'd never loved anybody like he loved her… and she just didn't seem to care. How could she do this to him? Leave him alone, covered in his own vomit and tears?
There seemed to be no solution, no easy way out, and no way to ever be happy again. Fox stood there and realized that it was over; that he'd die a horrible, bloody death in space and very few people would actually care. What a feeling it was…..
Sorry for the short entry, but this piece is very sentimental – and in some ways healing- to me because I've recently gone through something like this in my life. I had to write this in order to better understand the situation, and I think it came out pretty good. Thanks for reading,
-ThatWinchieGuy
