gah! I'm so tired and my throat hurts. just my luck I get an ulcer the first week off of school and it's right at the back where I can't put bonjela on it.

anyway, i'm probably not very funny again this week but hey what can a comic do on a tired brain?


Shaky is fast asleep on the couch in his room. The narrator leans in and presses a horn to his ear, you know the cans. 3...2...1 BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP! Shaky wakes up and clutches his hands to his ears

Shaky: god damn it! My ears!

Rise and Shine fucker!

Shaky: I'd kill you if it wasn't a form of suicide

Whatever, we've got a show to do.

Shaky: I'm starting to regret creating you

I know


Shaky walks in. he reaches the middle of the room and is about to open a portal when NINJAS! drop in from the ceiling. They try to attack but Shaky opens a portal next to each of the NINJAS! and a sword comes out and stabs them. I hope shadow can get his money back.

Shaky: nah. NINJAS! don't do refunds.

Why are we shouting NINJAS! every time we say it.

Shaky: yeah let's stop that

Shaky kneels on the floor and uses his Shadow powers to materialize all of the guests in their seats.

Shaky: afternoon, all

All: hey

Shaky: and for our first guest: Timid

Timid and shadow walk through the shadow door. The ninjas failed.

Shadow: damn! I thought for sure they'd kill him

Timid: come on! He's not that weak

Shaky: Get on with the questions already

Timid: oh! Right. To Shaky: last one was kinda short, wasn't it?

Shaky: meh, I was tired and couldn't be bothered to write much.

Timid: whatever. To Falco: that pepperoni was all slimy didn't you notice, arse-face?

There's more swearing this time round isn't there

Shaky: mm-hmm

Falco: yeah...well...erm....I CAN'T TAKE ALL THIS PRESSURE!!!

Falco sinks to the floor and goes into the foetal position. Damn! I Lost THE GAME! Falco mumbles something in a high pitched voice.

Shaky: Damn! I lost THE GAME!

Timid: To Leon: I've heard kissing a smoker is gross! What's your opinion?

Leon: you get used to the taste and I smoke every now and again so it's not bad

Timid: To Narrator: how's the training going?

Finished it and killed my master already!

Shaky: yeah! How do you think I got this swanky temple?

Timid: Shaky: How did you die?

Shaky: I am not at liberty to say under threat of imminent attack by the T.V.

Timid: low growlGood, otherwise somebody might have had to do something nasty to you that they might not want to do

Shaky: Don't hurt me! Please! I'm begging you!

Timid: I won't, not yet anyways. cheery voice OK that's me done!

Shaky regains his composure.

Shaky: and now it's time for...The amazing...Foxfighter220!

Foxfighter enters through a door to the north to one person saying yay with very low enthusiasm he then jumps to the middle of the room and punches shaky in the face. Ooh! That's gonna leave a mark!

Shaky:monotone ow, that was painful

FF220: that's for not calling me Joe!

Shaky: well here you go Joe! Have a bit of my sorry KNUCKLE SANDVICH!!!!

Shaky punches Joe through the shadow door and into the hall of razors. Awesome TF2 reference!

Shaky: I know, I went back and changed it. Hey what's this?

Shaky picks up a red staff on the floor where Joe stood. It looks like a morphing stick that turns into anything except a red morphing stick factory

Shaky: sweet I can use it to make a Blue morphing stick factory. I prefer Blue. onto Hakkyou000

Hakkyou walks in a door to the south backwards blasting a shotgun. a zombie jumps at him but Hakkyou shoots it's head off just in time then closes the door.

H000: damn zombie flu pandemic, I knew I shouldn't have taken that vacation in raccoon city. To Shaky: You broke my arm! What the Fuck?!

Shaky: yeah and?

H000: I'll kill you!

H000 starts to run forward but Shadow Roundhouses him in the face so hard it went back in time and was the bullet that made Kennedy's head explode.

Shadow: low growl He's mine!

H000: whatever just don't tase me Bro'!

Shaky: what with this Tom A Swift's Electric Rifle. I won't

Shaky pulls the trigger

Shaky: oops my finger slipped.

H000:Twitching any...way to Wo...lf: eww you w...ant Leon...inside you?Twitches

Wolf: every day

H000: to Shadow: Sex...Corridor, awesome!

Shadow: seriously go look in the drawer you'll like it.

H000: I will To Fox & Krystal: aren't you like 30 it's kinda gross the way you guys act if you think about it, I mean you're constantly aroused, I mean like horny as a bull.

Krystal: all the girls in sex and the city are over 30.

H000: fair point. to Timid: I think Shadow likes you

Shadow appears behind her and starts kissing her, and they start walking to the sex corridor and reach it without parting.

H000:Shoots Shaky in the face take that biznatch! Shaky is absolutely fine.

Shaky grabs Hakky by his neck, lifting him of the floor. Shaky then roundhouses him into a wall, Chuck Norris style!

Shaky: OK after that one I'm so bored I'm gonna sleep through the rest of my show

Ok now we have Venomdark.

Shaky:ZZZZZZZ

Venom drops from the ceiling and tries to piledrive Shaky, but he rolls back then pushes off and two-foots Venom in the face. He gets a massive gushing nosebleed which blasts him off.

Venom: I'm blasting off again He flies off into the distance and tumbles through a shadow door. To Fox: AK-47 or M-16?

Fox: they are both feeble weapons compared to my blaster!

Venom: oh yeah! He pulls out both of the weapons and blows Fox to pieces Now who's feeble BIATCH!

Fox: me?

Venom: that's what I thought pulls out G3 and points it at Katt to Katt: do you like milk?

Katt: no...I love milk! If I could do the nasty with it Falco would be out of a job!

Venom: To everyone: Candy tastes good!

Shaky:sleep talkingyou got some?

Venom: Nah! I ates it all

Shaky: WHAT!Still sleep talking. He jumps off the coach and proceeds to kill venom very slowly and very painfully. Shadow and Timid return from doing the nasty(Timid: Shaky how dare you insinuate i was involved with any illegal activity. Shaky: fine!) kissing in the sex corridor.

Shadow: To Panther and Miyu: everything? Checks sex corridor draw Well apparently I have a knack for vampirism and some whip play. Kinky, ain't it?

Timid: I can't wait for that

Shadow: can't wait to test the bed springs

Shaky: you guys live an ocean away from each other, I wouldn't hold your breath My god! He's still sleep talking and he's still killing Venom!?

Shadow: we'll meet someday! To Fay and Bill: go do the do you'll love it!#

Fay and bill: Don't need to tell us twice! They rush to use the rooms and oohs can be heard from inside.

Shaky: Still not awake well that's all folks!


Yes TASER is an acronym for Tom A Swift's Electric Rifle, look it up on wikipedia!

Y'all come back now ya hear!