One year ago. Just one year ago today, Harleen's life had changed forever. Just one year ago today, she had busted Joker out of Arkham, and taken on her new role as his sidekick, Harley Quinn.

"Sidekick"... Her initial thought was that she and Joker would be considered 'partners', but the media had taken to calling her 'sidekick,' and her Puddin' seemed to enjoy it, so… sidekick it was.

Still, that aside, they'd had a good run of it so far. There'd been all sorts of ridiculous schemes, including robberies, hostage-taking, comical murder, and, of course, attempts to kill The Bat once and for all.

That last one was her least favorite… Puddin' had a strange, honestly irritating fixation on Batman, and whenever he indulged in it by planning the next big plot entirely around Batman… well, it was always doomed to fail. Early on, Harley had let herself get caught up in the idea that they just might be able to kill The Bat, but at this point, she knew that was virtually impossible. That guy was a monster, and she wouldn't be surprised to learn he was immortal. Not that Harley would ever pass up a chance to take a shot at the guy, but she didn't expect she'd actually manage to off him - not anymore.

Today there wouldn't be any plans, though. No great schemes. No talk of Batman. Today was the one-year anniversary of Joker and Harley's new life together, and she was intent on making it the best day either of them had experienced in quite a while.

She'd gotten up early, sneaking into the kitchen of their hideout so she could make breakfast. There were two main levels of this current 'home' of theirs - the main floor, where 'the boys' stayed and where planning and such was done, and the top floor, where Harley and Joker stayed. There was a small kitchen on this top floor, and Harley had stocked it with a few of her favorite foods, including breakfast staples like eggs, sausage, and pancakes.

Those staples were what she prepared this particular morning, her goal to get them all ready before Joker awoke. Which almost worked - just as Harley poured the last of the pancake batter onto the skillet, Mistah J stumbled into the dining room, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"You're up… early," he said, yawning partway through. "What's the occasion?"

Harley stopped moving, spatula beneath a partially-cooked pancake. Flipping it, she turned sharply to look at him, pointing the utensil accusingly. "Our anniversary!"

Eyebrows raising for a moment, he cocked his head to the side. "Anniversary? Did we get married at some point?"

Rolling her eyes and sighing dramatically, Harley said, "No, we didn't. It's the anniversary 'a when I broke ya outta Arkham!"

"Which time?"

"The first time!" she yelled, throwing her hands up. "It's when our lives togetha started, an' when I became Harley Quinn!"

He nodded slowly, one eyebrow still raised. "I see."

Plastering a smile on her face, Harley bounced on her feet. "So I wanted ta make ya a nice big breakfast, an' I gotta whole lotta other stuff planned for today, too!"

Joker grimaced. "Do you?"

Harley's smile faltered. "Why don't ya sound happy 'bout it?"

"Well, Harles, it's just that…" He paused, as though reluctant to continue. "I was thinking of talking to the boys about my new plan…"

Harley slammed the spatula into the counter. "You told 'em 'bout your plan yesterday!"

"Yes, but, I had some new ideas I wanted to incorporate," he said, rolling his eyes, as though this should have been obvious.

A burning smell reached Harley's nose, prompting her to knock the skillet off the burner, which she did without a backward glance. "Puddin', can't ya do that tomorrow? I wanted today ta be 'bout us!"

"Why?" Joker said, starting to look just as annoyed as Harley. "I get it's the anniversary of a big day for you , but for me it was just another asylum escape! A funny one, but still."

Harley jutted a lip out, for a more dramatic pout. "But, but… the start 'a our lives…"

Waving a hand, Joker said, "We met months before that! If you wanted to celebrate our anniversary, it should've been earlier this year!"

"Well then why didn't ya say somethin' then!?" Harley cried, wishing she was still holding the spatula so that she could slam it down again.

He shrugged. "I don't remember when exactly we met. I don't see why it's so important, frankly."

"You don't see!?" Harley clamped her mouth shut and stamped her feet. "Ain't it enough that it mattas to me!?"

Joker got to his feet, sighing softly. He strode toward her, arms open wide, a reassuring smile on his face. Reluctantly, she let him hug her. "Baby, look, I get it! Today means a lot to you. But you know what means a lot to me?"

Harley's eyes narrowed, even if she was unable to focus her gaze directly at Joker while being hugged. "...Your plan ta kill Bats?"

Squeezing her tighter, Joker nodded his head against her shoulder. "Exactly." He pulled away, smiling warmly despite her obvious anger. "So, how about this: I'll eat this wonderful breakfast you made for us, and then we'll go downstairs and talk through my new ideas. Maybe later tonight we can do one of the things you planned, if we've got time."

That was it.

"If we've got time!?" Harley screamed. "Do ya know how many fuckin' times I've tried ta have us spend a day - ONE DAY - togetha!?"

"Harley," Joker hissed, glancing toward the stairs. "There's no need to shout-"

"There's every reason ta shout! Ya won't listen if I-"

She stopped abruptly, ending her screaming with a whimper as Joker gripped her arm like a vice.

"I don't want the boys downstairs hearing you talk to me like that," Joker said, voice low and dangerous.

Shaking her head up and down quickly and biting her lip, Harley breathed a sigh of relief when he let go, allowing her to rub the newly sore spot with a hand. Sniffling, she wiped away a tear that had welled up, then turned back toward the oven, Flicking the burner off, she then marched back toward the bedroom, not glancing Joker's way even once.

Heading straight for the bed, she grabbed a pillow off it, then marched toward the bathroom.

"Harley, what are you doing?" Joker asked, standing in the bedroom door frame.

"I'm leavin'," she said, still not looking at him.

She heard a sigh. "Leaving? Why?"

Grabbing her toothbrush, she twirled around and marched back toward him, staring at him angrily. "'Cause ya care more 'bout Batman and your dumb plans ta off 'im that ya do 'bout me!"

Joker's eyes narrowed, even as he stepped back to allow her to leave the bedroom. "My plans are not dumb, and I don't care about them more than you! But I don't think you care about them enough!"

Grabbing the spatula off the kitchen conter, Harley turned to face Joker again. "I don't care 'bout the plans! I care 'bout you, and I like seein' ya happy, makin' your plans an' stuff! But you don't seem ta care if I'm happy!"

Making sure to use his 'soothing' voice, Joker shook his head and said, "Harleen, of course I care if you're happy! But this one's going to be big, don't you see!?"

"You say that every time!" She marched toward the stairs leading downward, stopping right before she reached them. "I'm leavin', an' I hope ya think about how ta treat me right while I'm gone!"

"Harley," Joker said, voice hard again. Surprised, she turned toward him. "If you're going to go, don't go through there. They don't need to know about this." He gestured toward another set of stairs to the right, which led upwards to the roof.

Hands balling into fists, Harley glared daggers at him and stomped toward the other stairs. "'A course, wouldn't wanna upset tha goons' delicate feelings, huh?" Stomping her way up the stairs, she paused before opening the roof-access door. "I might not come back this time, ya jerk!"

"You will," he said, just loud enough for her to hear.

Barely avoiding a scream, she tossed the door open, stepped through, and slammed it closed.

{}

Leaping from rooftop to rooftop, Harley got as far away from her old lair as possible. Finally, after a good ten minutes, she stopped. allowing herself a moment to breathe.

Admittedly, she didn't have any idea where she was going, other than 'away', and she didn't have any idea what she was actually going to do with herself now that she'd left. She'd have to stay away for a good few days, to really make him worry that she wouldn't be back. But where was she supposed to go? What was she supposed to do? It'd be difficult to get up to the sort of shenanigans she'd been a part of throughout the past year without a gang backing her up.

"Pamela, please," said a deep voice that Harley was entirely too familiar with. She flattened herself against the wall behind her, as if that would do anything to stop the friggin' Batman from finding her if he wanted to.

"You are not allowed to call me that," said another, feminine voice that Harley was also familiar with, though she hadn't heard it for quite some time. Her heart skipped a beat, and she shuffled along the wall, getting close to the corner, Tentatively, she peeked around it. Past the door leading into the building, near the edge of the rooftop, were none other than Batman and Poison Ivy, and neither of them looked happy. Not that Harley had ever seen Bats look happy, admittedly.

"Fine - Ivy. I'm sorry," Batman said, his hands open in a sort of supplicating gesture. "But please, consider it. I don't want to to have to fight you again."

"So just leave then," Ivy said, arms crossed and eyes in full 'death glare' mode.

Batman sighed. "You know I can't do that. I have to take you in, one way or another, but it can be peacefully, if you want it to be."

"Oh yes, I'm sure you'd love to avoid taking a beating from me, wouldn't you?" Ivy said with a sneer. "Bet you'd love getting Selina all to yourself for a while, too."

Batman seemed to falter for a moment, which was amazing for Harley, who had never seen him do anything of the sort. "This isn't about that-"

"Of course it is!" Ivy said, throwing her hands out for a moment before crossing them again. "You can't stand that we're together, don't pretend otherwise."

Batman spoke more softly this time, another first for Harley. "You're a murderer, Ivy."

"There it is, jumping on your moral high-horse again," Ivy spat, rolling her eyes. "I only murder the plant-killing scum that deserve it!"

"No one deserves death."

Ivy laughed. "What a load of crap. Of course some people deserve death! Even before I became a plant I knew that. Nazis, Klan members, rapists - none of them deserve to live. But Batman doesn't think so, does he? Everyone deserves a chance, even monsters like that, right?"

No response was forthcoming. Batman seemed incredibly uncomfortable, and Harley had to stifle the urge to cheer Ivy on.

"...Ivy, that's not the point."

"But it is! Your sense of moral superiority is the only reason you won't even consider I might be right to do what I do, and why you so hate the fact that I'm dating Selina." She jutted a finger toward Batman, and Harley noticed a small vine to Ivy's side mimic the movement. "And then you have the gall to think that awful asylum can 'fix' me, even though it's proven over and over again that it can't help anyone. All it's ever done is break people, and you know it. Joker's sidekick is proof enough of that."

Harley frowned. Even Ivy was calling her that?

"We both know that Harley Quinn happened because of Joker." He paused. "And you."

Harley and Ivy's eyes both went wide at virtually the same moment. For the first time in the conversation, Ivy seemed to be at a loss for words. "H-how… how dare you…"

"I read the reports, Ivy. And I saw her after your escape." He crossed his arms, shaking his head like a disapproving father. "Joker might be the one that twisted her, but you primed her for it."

Those jerks, talking about her like she wasn't there! Well, technically they didn't know she was, but… but it was the way they talked about her like she had no agency, like she was just being strung along by one person or another. She was her own woman, dammit! Not to mention their horrible mischaracterization of her Puddin', which was hardly surprising. No one understood him like she did. She wanted to give both of the self-righteous jerks a good slap.

A sharp, loud yell tore through Ivy's throat, and several vines covered in sharp, twisted thorns shot out at Batman. He seemed to be anticipating this, and dodged to the side as he threw something at Ivy. When it hit, she cried out again, this time in obvious pain, her body shaking as what Harley guessed was electricity coursed through it. Ivy fell to her knees, and her vines collapsed to the rooftop.

"I'm sorry it had to be this way," Batman said, moving in close and raising a fist.

"Liar," Ivy spat.

Springing to action, Harley charged at Batman before her mind even realized what she was doing. What exactly was the plan here? She had no weapons - just a pillow, a toothbrush, and a spatula. Well, better than nothing.

The spatula clanged against Batman's head and flew off to the side, but throwing it seemed to accomplish what she wanted, which was to distract him.

"Harley?" he said, incredulous.

"That's right!" she said, leaping into the air and falling back down with her pillow in hand. It smooshed against Batman's face, but didn't budge him an inch. She should've grabbed the firmer pillow.

His shout of surprise muffled, Batman suddenly tumbled to the ground. Harley belatedly noticed vines wrapped around the Bat's ankles, and she smiled as she saw Ivy getting to her feet.

"Harleen?" the plant lady said, just as baffled as Bats had been. "What are you doing here?"

"Saving your ass, that's what!" Harley said, hands on her hips.

Ivy glanced at the pillow. "...Is that what you're doing?"

"He was gonna knock ya out, and I successfully distracted him!" Harley said, pouting.

There was no disagreement. Vines wrapped around Batman's wrists, and one grabbed the pillow on his face, raising it up and offering it to Harley.

"Ew, no thanks, it's got Bat face on it now."

The vine dropped it back onto Batman's head.

Locking eyes with Harley, Ivy said, "Harleen, I've got to go, before he manages to get free." She paused. "Thank you." Another pause. "For helping me."

"No prob!" Harley said with a grin. She glanced down at her unusable pillow, and then to the toothbrush she still held in one hand. "Hey, uh... any chance ya can do me a solid an' help me out?"

"I-" Ivy stopped her comment short, seemingly thinking better of it.

"Ya owe me," Harley said, quirking an eyebrow. "And not just for this."

Suddenly it seemed as though it was difficult for Ivy to maintain eye contact. "...You're right. What do you need?"

"A place ta crash for a few nights."

Shock and anger warred with each other on Ivy's face. "A place to-? Harleen, you can't be ser-"

"It's Harley now, ain't ya heard? An' I'm totally serious." She glanced down at Batman again, who was visibly struggling against the vines. "Also, ya owe me a new pillow."

Rolling her eyes, Ivy said, "Ugh, fine, we'll discuss it later." She turned to run. "Let's go."

"Lead tha way!" Harley said, smiling and running after her.

This was working out way better than Harley had expected. Maybe she could stay away from Joker for a good week or so; that'd teach him. And all while annoying Ivy, who really, really deserved it for what she'd done. This anniversary just might turn out alright afterall.

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Hey look, Harley and Ivy together again for the first time since chapter three!