Guys, Im sorry it took me so long to update. Writing this physically hurts me, but from here on, next chapters, it's gonna be less emotional I think. I'm not sure to be honest.

Anyway, enjoy this and well, I wanted to see if anyone was interested in making my fics fanarts? It would mean a lot to me.

I need to give a special thanks to precious-passengerwho helped me with this chapter. Thank you baby girl .:*

Castiel looked at the pieces of the tablet and sighed. He hadn't even had time to mourn in the death of his friend. Gadreel had given his own life willingly to help and now that Cas had broken the tablet, he wondered if it was all worth it. He knew, something was wrong. He could feel it in the pit of his stomach.

It didn't take long though, till he found out why he was feeling this hole in his chest.

"Well played, Castiel." Came the voice Cas hated the most in the world. He looked up from the chair to see the little man the voice belonged to.

"Obviously you and Gadreel managed to turn a few dead enders against me."

Castiel tried not to cringe at the mentioned name.

"Gadreel is dead!"

"Ah! So Gadreel bites the dust." Metatron said as if there was no bigger joy in the world, and then his eyes caught the sight of the tablet pieces.

"And the angel tablet, arguably the most powerful instrument in the history of the universe is in pieces… and for what again?"

Castiel looked down, knowing where this question was headed.

"Oh, that's right… to save Dean Winchester. That was your goal, right?" Metatron moved closer to him and Cas just watched. He was sure if he let the douche go on, he'd find out the reason of his sic feeling.

"I mean you draped yourself in the flag of saving heaven, but ultimately, it was all about saving one human, right?"

Castiel clenched his jaw looking away. He was so close to punching the guy, but that would mess his plans. He couldn't risk losing this war.

"Well guess what?"

Castiel felt his stomach fall. This was it.

"He's dead too."

Castiel was gonna throw up. But that wasn't true. He knew Dean wasn't dead. He FELT the guy's heartbeats still. Not literally but… but he knew, something was wrong with his human and he wanted nothing more than to leave heaven to get to Dean's side.

"And you're sitting in my chair." Metatron said as a set of handcuffs chained him to the chair. He couldn't give a damn about it, all he needed was to be with Dean. But he needed to focus. He needed to make sure he can get to his beloved human soon.

"You will never get away with this!" He growled low in his voice. He was gonna make the other angel pay for hurting Dean. No one hurt Dean and got away with it.

"Get away with what? You told a silly story to a group of less than believers, I'll clean up your mess in an hour."

"You give out brothers and sisters far to little credit." Castiel growled trying to hold in a desperate sob. He'd never felt like crying before in his million years of life. Not even when he was a human.

"They will soon learn that you have been playing them."

Metatron laughed as if Cas had just told a funny joke.

"And then? They will do NOTHING. Because they are frightened little sheep, following my crook wherever it leads." Castiel looked at the guy trying to play his part. But there were tears in his eyes and he felt sick ti his core. Dean was chanting his name in his head and it was killing Cas. He wanted to run to his human.

"And where I'm taking them, back to our rightful place atop this mountain of human shame and excrement, when that happens, trust me, they're not gonna care how they got there." Castiel could just kill this guy, punch him till he died.

"You know, why you could never quite pull it together, Castiel? Why you're sitting here with your grace slowly burning away and your reputation long extinguished? No curiosity. You didn't read enough. You never learned how to tell a good story."

Castiel looked at him with narrowed eyes as Metatron brought up the blade. He hated the asshole so much, and he was a little happy, along being so fearful of losing Dean, that Metatron had spilled his guts out.

"But you did." He said, turning to see the angels come in and take the douche angel to be imprisoned. He wanted to fly straight to Dean then. He really wanted nothing more than to just fly. And he was about to when he felt it. He felt the string in his head that was meant for Dean tear apart. He felt the silence fall over his brain and thoughts. Dean Winchester was dead. He could feel it in every cell of his body. The righteous man, the guy he had saved from hell, heaven and purgatory was now dead.

He felt like choking at first before a sense of numbness took control of his body. It's like with the last bits of Dean leaving the world, the last bits of emotions left his body. Nothing left for him to live for. He was now, really and truly homeless… no one left who cared about him.

Castiel pushed Metatron in the cell with all the hate he felt. This was the creature who had killed his Dean. Oh god, he still couldn't believe it. Dean Winchester was dead…

"You're doing the right thing… letting him live… that's what a leader would do…"

Cas turned to look at Hannah, the emotionless expression written all over his face.

"I'm no leader, Hannah… I never was… I just want to be an angel."

"And your grace? What will you do about that? You WILL die if you don't replenish it…" Hannah said, looking utterly concerned. Castiel couldn't take it. He couldn't take the feeling of… being cared for. Not from anyone other than Dean. He knew what was next in the book for Dean. If it was a year ago, he'd just go and find Dean in heaven, but now… after he'd taken the mark of Cain… Castiel knew Dean would not be found in heaven.

Crowley growled as he heard Sam Winchester summon him.

"Winchesters!" he rolled his eyes and appeared by the door to the dungeon. Sam was so drunk he had no idea what he was doing. The devil's trap was broken.

He found his way to the room Dean was in and got in, sitting on a chair.

"Your brother, bless his soul, is summoning me as I speak. Make a deal, bring you back. It's exactly what I was talking about, isn't it? It's all become so… expected." He looked down, hating how attached he had become to these boys.

"You have to believe me, when I suggested you take on the mark of Cain, I didn't know this was going to happen. Not really. I mean, I might not have told you the entire truth. But I never lied. I never lied Dean. That's important. It's fundamental." He was scared, to be honest. Of what Dean was now able to do to him.

"But, there is one story about Cain, that I might have … forgotten to tell you." he paused just for dramatic purposes.

"Apparently, he, too, was willing to accept death rather than becoming the killer the mark wanted him to be." Another pause. "So he took his own life with the blade. He died. Except, as rumor has it, the mark never quite let go."

He reached and pulled out the blade.

"You can understand why I never spoke of this. Why set hearts aflutter at mere speculation?" he smiled looking at the blade. He would have loved to have the power himself but for now, Dean was the boss and Crowley wanted to show he was loyal.

"It wasn't until you summoned me, no, it wasn't truly until you left that cheeseburger uneaten… that I began to let myself believe…" he put the blade in Dean's hand, placing them on his chest.

"Maybe miracles do come true… listen to me Dean Winchester, what you're feeling right now, it's not death. It's life, a new kind of life…" he smirked.

"Open your eyes Dean. See what I see, feel what I feel. And let's go take a howl at that moon.

And Dean did. He opened his eyes, this new sensation going through his veins. And Dean did. He opened his eyes, this new sensation going through his veins. It was sheer power and rage. He felt stronger than he ever had, and he was angry. He needed revenge. From the world.

He smirked, sitting straight holding the blade close to his chest and looked at Crowley. The poor guy looked so scared it made Dean laugh, with a tone so foreign it even startled himself for a second before he decided that he loved this new laughter. It was so carefree and hot. He was gonna have so much fun.

He disappeared, not wanting to risk Sam finding out he's alive. The world was his to take and he didn't need Crowley to know that.

Sam spent half an hour like that, on his knees and waiting for Crowley. Dammit, he needed his brother back and he had no other option. Unless… why hadn't he thought about it before? He needed Castiel.

He got to his knees running to Dean's room, calling for Castiel. And then the empty bed in the room hit him so hard he actually felt breathless. There was no Dean in the room.

"What the…" he whispered looking around. Maybe he had put his brother in another room and didn't remember?

He checked all the rooms, calling Dean's name. Some stupid part of his brain wanted him to believe that maybe his brother was alive and walking. He went back to Dean's room and this time he felt it.

"Sulfur…" he murmured angrily, this time calling Cas' name out loud. He needed the angel. He didn't know why demons would need Dean's corpse, or how a demon had come inside the bat cave, but he knew it wasn't anything good.

As soon as Castiel heard Sam's voice calling for him, he realized where he had been wrong. Just because Dean was gone that didn't mean Cas didn't have a job to do. Dean hadn't gotten to say his last words to Cas, but he was pretty sure it would have revolved around Sam and how he had to take care of the young Winchester when Dean was gone.

He appeared by Sam's side, making him jump.

"Hello Sam." He said, his guilt and hurt taking over his voice causing it to come out rougher than usual.

"Cas… thank God you're ok." the younger Winchester hugged him and that's when Cas noticed he was still shaking, broken sobs moving his body. He put his arms around the guy, like how Sam had taught him a few weeks before and to his surprise, it immediately made himself feel better too.

"Sam… I'm sorry I couldn't get here in time…" He said looking down as soon as he'd let go of the taller boy. The guy gave out another broken sob in response.

"Metatron is in heaven's prison, guarded and under control."

Sam just nodded.

"Where is he? Can i…?"

Sam shook his head.

"That's why I called you… Cas, he's gone. His body is gone… I… I found sulfur but… I don't understand…"

It was then that is hit Castiel. Sam didn't know.

"Oh Sam…" Cas was lost, trying to figure out how to tell Sam what had happened to Dean.

"Sam… Dean is… I can't ever prepare you enough for this, but your brother is not dead."

Sam's silent shaking stopped as he looked at Cas with utter shock.

"What?"

There was a look of hopefulness and beginning of glee in young Winchester's face that Castiel couldn't bear to break.

"He's… He's become a demon. Not just a demon, he's now a knight of hell."

"Oh…" was all Sam managed to get out before everything went to hell.

Don't forget to leave me reviews babies.