***Figured I should post before my weekend becomes completely Superbowl oriented! Hope you enjoy! Sorry it's a bit short- hopefully I'll be able to post the next part soon, which I know is going to be longer. That should make up for it! I still don't own anything to do with Deadliest Catch. Shocking, I know***
The big storm had Christina banished to the wheelhouse indefinitely. Even though she insisted her knee was good enough to work on, Don wasn't taking any chances with the wind and waves on deck. Secretly, she was glad to be in the warmth and safety of the wheelhouse. She watched how the water buffeted the crew around and heard the wind screaming, and felt pretty good about sitting this one out. Her knee was better, but it wasn't 100% yet. If she was talking to Don, she'd say it was probably 90%. If she was realistic, it was maybe 75%. She really needed the barometer to settle down a bit.
John and Andy had no playful, brotherly banter in the wheelhouse that night. She learned quickly that Andy wasn't talking, but John answered her questions remarkably well. His answers were short, but they were to-the-point and enough to satisfy the producers sitting safely on dry land. She found herself hating those producers as a wave rocked the ship and sent Scotty sliding on his ass across the deck. Andy laughed at that and made an obscene comment to his nephew over the loudspeaker. He was promptly flipped off, which made him laugh again, but he was quickly serious as he shifted the boat to steer them out of the trough.
"What'd'ya think, bro? Time to call it?" he asked, risking a glance at John.
"I think it's that time," John nodded. "You gotta focus on getting us through this. No need to risk the guys."
Andy picked up his hailer, but found himself sending out a, "Watch out, watch out!" instead of sending the guys inside. The wave knocked Mike off his feet, and Chris found her eyes glued to the deck. She didn't realize how tense she was or that she was holding her breath until he got up and flashed a thumbs-up. "You good?" Andy asked, and Mike held both hands up before heading back to the rail. "Alright, secure the deck and head in, boys. We're callin' it."
John told Andy he was going to get some sleep so he could take the wheel in an hour or so, and Andy mumbled a thanks as his brother left. It was clear to Chris that there was no talking now, that all of Andy's attention was out there at the unforgiving waters. She didn't want them to go down tonight any more than he did.
She contented herself with just watching him work. She took in the fact that his arm muscles were completely tense as he fought to keep the boat cutting through the water. Even though she had no clue where he was taking the boat, she trusted that Andy knew what he was doing. His jaw was tight and he wasn't blinking nearly often enough for a normal person. He wasn't really breathing often enough, either, but she'd rather that than the quick, shallow breathing of someone who was panicking. Something about the slow, deep breaths made her feel safe.
"I have a ranch in Indiana. Raise horses."
"That's…good?" Chris frowned, looking around the wheelhouse to see if Andy was really talking to her. Convinced that he was, she figured he was starting the conversation for a reason and kept it going. "Do you like it?"
"I love it," he nodded. "I'm the cowboy of the family. John…he's a rockstar. A redneck, but a rockstar. I could never be like him. I listen to country and wear cowboy hats and go to rodeos." He paused to watch a particularly menacing wave narrowly miss them. "Every time I face a storm like this, I swear to myself that, after the season, I'm going to get off the boat, go to my ranch, and not come back." He fell silent as a wave crashed against the wheelhouse window, but Chris was at a loss for what to say. Thankfully, he continued.
"I could do it, you know. Financially. I could walk away tomorrow and live just fine off of the horses I raise."
"But you always come back."
Andy smirked bitterly. "Yeah. I always come back. I'm a fucking idiot, you know that? My whole family is. We're gonna die out here one day. This life killed my old man, it nearly killed John once, got Phil, and it'll get me in the end. But I always come back. You know why?" Before she could answer, he plowed on. "It's in the blood. Being out here, defying God just by waking up in the morning…makes you feel alive. Knowing that my dad did it, and his dad before him, and the Scotty's down there just waiting to take the reins…you don't walk away from that. You're a damn fool for not walking away, but you don't. I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't out here. Every season, I'm tired and sore as hell and can't wait to go home, but I go home and within a week, I just want to get back out on the water. When it's all you're good at, it's all you ever do with your life. It's all you know how to do."
"That's not fair, Andy," Chris insisted. "To yourself or to the job. Is there nothing out here you like?"
"I love it out here," Andy answered as if the question was crazy, his eyes glued to the waves. "There's nothing else I want to do. That's what makes me such a goddamn moron, Chrissy." She was again at a loss for what to say, but Andy once more continued the conversation. "I need you to be honest with me about Mike. What's going on?"
"Why do you ask?"
"I've never needed a boat dating policy before," Andy frowned and shook some unwanted thought from his head. "I really don't want to think about that. I'm not going to make a crew dating policy. So, if anyone were to…experiment, I guess, I hope for their sakes that it goes well."
Something about the honesty from Andy made her feel obligated to speak the truth herself. Still, she flicked the camera off before answering, because being honest with Andy was different than sharing with the dozens of people that would review her film. "He…we kissed a few nights ago. But we haven't had time to talk about it since then, and I'm glad for that. I'm in a weird position, being the first female from Deadliest Productions sent out on a crab boat. I don't want to ruin it for any future women, and I don't want to lose my respect with the guys here. With you."
"Do you want to be with him, though?"
Chris shrugged and sighed. "I don't know, Andy. I really don't know."
"Mike's a good guy; you'll figure it out. Just…if it doesn't go his way, don't hurt him, okay? I like having you on my boat, and I don't want it awkward around here in the future. Fuck," he swore as a wave threw the boat off-center. The time for talking was done, and Christina was glad. She wasn't sure what else to say.
