Alaina sat quietly looking at John as he scowled at his water glass for the umpteenth time that night. She had no idea if she had done anything wrong, all she knew was that this was not what she wanted. She had wanted a quiet dinner with John to talk as they had done before, to behave as the friends that they had been before she had chosen to go back with her husband. She wanted the quiet whispers as he leaned across the table that promised all she was afraid to have. No matter what had happened between the two she knew that they had never been this way. They had never been awkward.

"Did I do something to upset you? I'm really trying to figure it out but you just seem, I don't know, mad I guess," she finally said after she couldn't take John's brooding silence any longer.

"What? Mad? No."

"John, can you at least answer me in more than monosyllabic words?"

"I'm sorry I just," John dropped his head and shook his head. "I've been watching that guy at the bar over there for the last twenty minutes and he hasn't stopped looking at you."

Alaina looked over at the bar and smiled. She saw the man that John was talking looking nowhere but straight ahead.

"Johnny boy, he isn't looking over here. And if he is, it's probably to look at you. You are kind of a big deal ya' know."

John laughed and took Alaina's hand in his. "You really don't get how guys look at you. Seriously Al, if he doesn't stop I'm going over there and saying something."

"You are saying nothing John. You go over there and one person with a camera phone puts it all over youtube and twitter that John Cena is assaulting fans and your career is done for. If he is looking at me, which I highly doubt, you're staying put right here."

"I can't—he's—I hate that you're right. Al, you're gorgeous, and I know you won't believe me but it's true. You are captivating, and intelligent, and I keep getting this jealous feeling deep in my gut. I just found you, I can't let you get away again."

"Johnny boy, I flew halfway across the country to find you there's no way you're getting rid of me that easily. How was the rest of your day? I know that you had to jam a lot of interviews in to get the time off for this."

"Not really, I just had a few things to do. It's more trying to get the business end of everything together. I always have some kind of agent calling me up asking me about something."

"Don't give those agents a bad name. I was a good one to you for a while there."

John chuckled and nodded his head in agreement. "I haven't had one that was as good as you since. I've gone through three agents in the past six months. They all say I'm too much to deal with. Something about having some kind of inhuman drive and ambition."

Alaina laughed. "You definitely aren't easy to keep up with but it is doable if you know how to handle Mr. Superhuman himself. Thanks for tucking me in last night by the way. I thought it was Randy until I saw your note. I'm not used to being on my own yet. There are a lot of nights that I wake up freezing because I fell asleep on the couch or something. Nice move reading my poetry while I was passed out too. You know I don't like people reading my stuff."

"Your stuff is great. I don't understand why you don't try and do what you can to publish something. I think that a lot of people would relate to you. You've gone through a lot, and you put it into words beautifully."

Alaina cleared her throat after a moment and kept her eyes on the tablecloth that she was picking at. She had never been good at taking compliments but hearing that after reminding herself how alone she was; she was on the verge of tears.

"So, anyway, how's Maria? I haven't really seen her since the other night. She doesn't hate me does she?"

It was John's turn to duck his head and study the table. "I kicked her out of my room this morning."

"Wait, what? You kicked her out? Weren't you guys doing really well together?"

"No, not really. We were comfortable in each other's company but that was all. She knew it, I knew it. Things got a little out of control this morning and I told her that she needed to leave."

"John, what happened?"

"She said that she was being ignored by me so that I could get you in bed before you left tomorrow. I don't want that Al, you know that right? You know how much you mean to me don't you?"

"Of course I know that John, but why would you get all upset over that?"

"Al, she talked badly about you, and I won't stand for that. Not only that but if she thinks that I'm the kind of man that can do what she talked about then," he shrugged his large shoulders and finally lifted his head to look Alaina in the eye. "We shouldn't be together if she can say those things not only about you, but about me."

Alaina sighed and bit her lip. There were so many things that she wanted to say. There were so many reactions and feelings plowing through her at high speed that she couldn't decide on what to react to first. She wanted to tell him how happy she was that he seemed to be free. She wanted to grab hold of him and keep him close for days. She wanted to express her incredible happiness but the thing that she felt most deep inside was dread.

"John, she isn't going to let you go just like that."

"What? Al, did you hear me? I broke things off with Maria. I thought this was what you wanted. I know that this is what I wanted. Why would you say that?"

"Maria loves you John. I saw it all over her when we were at dinner the other night. She is head over heels, write all over your notebook with hearts and stars in love with you," she smiled when she heard John chuckle at her description. "Yes you may have kicked her out, but that could just be a fight. She's thinking that you need to cool off."

"No, I made myself clear. I told her that I didn't want her around me. She knows that we're over."

"Maybe in guy language you think you were clear. I'm telling you though, when you see her later she's going to apologize, rub your arms and tell you that she was wrong."

"Even if she does it doesn't mean anything. I'm here with you. She knows that I chose you, that I will always choose you. She doesn't stand a chance and she knows it."

"Oh great, now I get to be the target of half the diva roster, just what I need. I'll just be sitting there in my office, at my desk minding my business when I'll get catty remarks thrown at me. One of them with big old fake boobs will say something mean, I'll get mad and then we'll have to fight. And then the minute that I'm done fighting her off and pulling out her fake hair I'll lose my job, wind up losing my apartment and then I'll have to move in with my mom. That's only going to lead to a nervous breakdown because as sweet as my mom is she drives me absolutely insane, I can't take the woman for more than a day at a time."

"Al," John said leaning over the table to put his hand over her mouth. "You ramble when you're nervous, I never knew that. It's actually really cute. Since when are you so anti- diva anyway? I thought you were one of those feminist types that believe that the women are just as capable wrestlers as the guys. And just so you know, some of those girls have real boobs. I should know they let me check 'em out."

"I'm being serious John; don't make a joke out of this," she couldn't help but smile at his dimpled grin. He loved to be silly and joke around. Alaina had fallen in love with his big inner child. "Maria is a determined woman. Mark my words man; she is not going to let you go."

"I think you're being a bit paranoid. You really don't have anything to worry about."

"Yeah just like you have nothing to worry about with that guy by the bar," Alaina mutters looking down at her glass annoyed.

She knew that there was no reason for her really to be irritated but she was. She had just blown off John's worry about the man at the bar so she shouldn't have felt discarded. This was different though. She knew that Maria had incredibly strong feelings for John. They had a long past filled with history, love, romance. She knew that if she were in Maria's place that she would not be letting John go that easily. She also knew that now, in this moment, she wasn't letting anyone take him from her again. Alaina would have John as her own no matter what she had to do. John was right, he had chosen her and Maria knew it. No matter what else happened, Maria would always know that John had chosen Alaina.

"Hey, what's got you smiling like that?" John asked with an amused grin on his face. "I thought you were mad at me with the look on your face and then all of a sudden you're smiling."

"I just realized that you're absolutely right. You did choose me today, and no matter what may happen down the line we're finally in a good place."

"Al, I know that I've said this before but I am so sorry about how I handled everything. I ran away from you and I should never have done that. You are the best thing that has happened to me and I went about everything all wrong. All we've done is fight and go back and forth because of me."

"I know you're sorry Johnny boy. I know that you didn't want things to happen the way that they did. We can't go back in time though, and I really am not interested in starting over. It hurt me a lot when you ignored me but I understand why you did it. I can't sit here and say that I would sit around and watch you get on with your life happily and be supportive the whole way. I know we haven't really talked about this at all but that night that you left," Alaina stopped and swallowed the lump that had suddenly appeared in her throat. She was used to talking through her feelings, writing them down, but looking into John's clear blue eyes had her nervous and choking up. "When I read that note I just sat there and cried. It was the best and worst thing that could happen at the time. I could tell when you were holding me that you were crying too. I felt how badly you were hurting. You were the most exciting man that I had ever met. We touched and it was like nothing that I have ever felt before. I loved Joe, I was incredibly in love with Joe but it was all eclipsed by you. There was nothing that could make me feel like you did. I wanted to keep that with me, always. I never wanted to hurt you and I knew I would keep you around for selfish reasons. When I saw that you left I was so happy for you. I was happy that one of us had that strength to do what needed to be done."

"Alaina, that was without doubt one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life. I almost didn't do it. Every time that I moved that night you just grabbed me tighter like you needed me. Like if I let you go you would just fall apart right then."

"I wanted you to have a great life with great love John. I knew that I had broken everything that was between us. I couldn't take it back, I couldn't fix it. I would just sit at my desk or at home thinking about you, imagining that you were off somewhere having this amazing time and it hurt as much as it helped. I needed to try things out with Joe. I had to know if I could save my marriage. I'm so sorry that I hurt you and that I walked away but I needed it. Joe needed it too. He—well he met someone while we were apart. It wasn't really anything like between you and me, but he said that it made him realize there was a lot still left to work out between us. And there really was. He was my first everything. He is the only man that I have ever been with, the only man that I let in to my life, until you. I couldn't just tell him that I had moved on because I hadn't."

John looked at Alaina's watery eyes knowing that she was close to breaking down. It seemed like every time that he saw her he was bringing her to tears. He only wanted to make her happy but somehow he knew that she needed time to fall apart and to heal from all that she had been through. He cleared his throat and looked down at the table. It was the first time that she had really explained to him why she had gone back. It was the first time that he had given her the chance to talk about it.

"I didn't know that you felt that way. I just thought that you thought you had to go back. I figured you just thought that since you were married you needed to stay married no matter what. I couldn't be the side guy that just breezed in and out of your life when it was convenient for you."

"That would be a pretty big breeze there Johnny boy. I have never felt that people needed to stay married just because. I was raised by a wonderful single mother. I wouldn't stay with someone out of obligation. I needed to see my own feelings through to the end first. Before I could come to you and tell you any of this."

"You said he moved out last month?" Alaina nodded and started picking at the salad that had been placed in front of her. "What took you so long to come to me then?"

Alaina took a bite of her salad immediately feeling the rush of shame that she felt the need to eat at all. She wanted to close down her system, make it so that she never needed to eat again but she knew that John was sitting right across from her watching her intensely. He knew that she hadn't been eating much and she did not want another inquisition on her appetite. She was having enough trouble getting through this conversation with John.

"Al," John said quietly after she hadn't answered him. "Why didn't you let me know earlier?"

She wanted to lie, to tell him something that didn't sound like she was losing her mind, her fight. She wanted to make it sound as if it had just taken her time to get her courage together. That wasn't the truth though. She had plenty of courage. Once she had the strength to get herself out of bed and face her life. The truth was that the day they had decided to end their marriage, Joe and Alaina sat on their couch and spoke about everything they had never said to each other before. They had talked until sunrise, until Joe finally took himself off the couch and packed a bag. And she had kept a brave face on until he kissed the top of her head and walked out the front door. Then she had broken down and cried. She had loved Joe since she was eighteen years old. She had never loved another until John had come into her life. And she had given up John months ago in hopes that she could figure out her warring emotions and John could have a full, happy life. So she sat on her couch and continued crying for the next two days.

It had taken her nearly seventy two hours to pull herself enough together to be able to speak, and the one and only person that she had interest in talking to was Randy. She had never expected him to come by but she was never happier than we he did, forcing her to drink and eat something.

She knew that she must have looked awful when Randy suggested several times that she needed a hospital. It was only with his threats of a trip to the ER that she forced down the food that he put in front of her. He spent a week with her as she sat on the couch crying until she fell asleep and then woke up to begin crying again. And when he had to go back to work, he never said a word other than having his fiancée show up and care for her.

Alaina hadn't shown up earlier because she was still fighting back the tide of the dark emotions that had taken hold of her when Joe had found a temporary place to live. It was only when he came back to move all of his things out that she called up her family and try fighting off the negative emotions she was feeling. Joe had moved out a month earlier, but they had called their marriage off weeks before.

"I couldn't John."

"You mean you wouldn't right? That you just didn't want to see me right away. That you were still angry that no matter how many times you called I never picked up." John's tone was not angry or defensive. He was simply resigned. He knew that she resented him for leaving her alone and he couldn't blame her.

"No John I don't mean any of that. I would have come to you, called you the minute that it all happened if I could have. I mean I could not physically do any of that. Joe moved out a few weeks before I told my family. It was about three days after he left that I told Randy. It was nearly two weeks before I could move off the couch, before I felt like I could get up and feed myself, move around, just live."

"Al I'm sorry I didn't—you've always been—I – I'm sorry," John said sighing and grabbing her hand.

"It's ok. I know why you would think what you did but it wasn't that. I wanted you John, I really did. I think I cried about losing you as much as I cried about losing Joe. You are both two of the biggest presences in my life. I lost you both and I, I just lost it."

"What happened? I mean what changed?"

"I just woke up fresh out of tears. I've never been one to sit around and wallow in self-misery. I think that I hadn't really dealt with everything with you yet and I just went off the deep end for a bit. Randy stayed with me at first, filling the time with stupid small talk. You have no idea the things that I know about that man now. Then when Sam came to stay with me she cried with me one day. She just sat there and we cried almost all day long. I just started screaming about everything, how unfair it all was. How I was supposed to be a mom happily married. Or at the very least that I was supposed to be happy with you. I trashed my apartment that day screaming about how the universe owed me at least that much happiness. That if God only gives us what we can handle that I needed a shovel to dig out of all the crap that had been piled on top of me. I screamed and cried and threw anything that wasn't nailed down. And Sam, that crazy freaking woman just helped me. She started handing me things to throw and yelling with me. I told her to go home after we were done, that I was ok alone. That I needed to know I could be ok on my own. When I woke up the next day I was just over it I guess."

"So you're over your marriage ending?"

"Yes and no. I'm accepting of it I would more say. I know that things happen the way that they need to. I know that Joe and I could never make each other happy in a relationship again but I wake up still looking for him. I walk around ready to throw out some random question that I know would make him laugh at me and my crazy train of thought. We knew it needed to end but it didn't make it any easier to end it."

"That's why you still talk to him then? Because you miss him?"

"Partly yes. He's amazing to me, always has been and I suspect always will be. There's never a day that goes by that I don't think of something that I want to tell him. I stop myself a lot though. We aren't that way anymore. We can't be if we ever expect to move on from our marriage. I just—I can't let all of him go that fast. I don't know how to live life without him in it. The few months that I had to try just kind of sucked."

"Are you still in love with him?" John whispers the question terrified of the answer. She had asked him about Maria but he had never asked about Joe too scared to know the truth.

"Johnny boy, the only person that I am in love with right now is you. I love him very much and suspect I always will. I think it's just emotions tied to past memories though. We were happy together once, and it was a beautiful time in my life. The people we are now though, we could never be together. I want something totally different than he does. I want to be settled down somewhere with a comfortable life, he wants the adventure he feels like he's been given a second chance to have."

"Is there any room in the picture you have of your future for just a little bit of adventure?" John asked smiling as he pinched his thumb and forefinger together.

"I don't know it depends on who asks. I mean I would need some pretty strong incentive."

"What if I asked you to have adventures with me?"

"I'm not all that sure. I've heard that you're in deep with some chick."

"Oh yeah and who would that be?"

"From what I hear she's pretty small, real little thing but she's kinda hot. Big eyes, long hair great curves. I don't know if I could compete with any of that."

John laughed the first full free laugh of the meal. "That's true, she is incredibly gorgeous. I'm not really sure if you could compete with her either. Ow," he yelled as Alaina pinched his skin on his arm. "Come on, let's get out of here, it's time to get to the arena."

Alaina laughed at John's over-exaggeration of pain and took a look at the time. She was surprised that they had been sitting and talking for over an hour. She had not talked to anyone that in depth since Joe. And not even Joe knew how hard of a time she had right after they split.

"You are still coming with me to the arena right?"

"Oh, yeah of course," she said breaking herself from her thoughts. "I'm looking forward to it. I didn't think I would get to see Randall much before I left so I'm glad I get to say goodbye."

"You guys really are close." John had to fight to not roll his eyes. He knew that his tone held a large amount of resentment in it however.

"John, he's a great friend, to you and me. He took care of me because he knew you still cared about me. You should be grateful, not jealous."

"I know baby, and I am I just—I hate that I wasn't there. I hate that you went through all of that without me."

"I wouldn't change a thing," Alaina said confidently. "I may not be fully there to getting over everything that happened but I know what I want. I know what's going to make me happy and I'm not afraid to try and get it. I wouldn't have that now if I didn't go through all that I did."

"Al, I know that it's bad timing, it always seems like bad timing, but you and me, are we—can we—are we giving a relationship a try?"

Alaina smiled at John as she stood to leave the table. "Tell ya' what Johnny boy, when you work everything out with Maria and she stops throwing herself at you, we'll talk about a relationship then."

John paid the bill as he watched Alaina walk towards the door. "She's not throwing herself at me!" he yelled after her. Her hand in the air was the only way he knew she had heard. He also knew it was her way of telling him that she did not believe that for a second.


John cringed and fought the urge to physically remove Maria from his side when he realized that Alaina was right in everything that she said. It had taken no more than five minutes after Maria had seen him for her to apologize, curl up into his side and tell him that he had every right to be angry with her. That was over an hour ago, and no matter how many times he seemed to move from her side Maria always found a way to sidle right back up to him.

The only thing that was keeping his frustration under control was the amount of amusement Alaina seemed to be getting from the whole situation. Any moment that he found to be alone with her Maria would somehow show up and put herself in their conversation continuously apologizing for her behavior. And no matter how many times John looked over at Alaina and mouthed the words "help me" all she would do was mouth back "told you so", or something equally unhelpful. She kept him calm by throwing him funny faces and rambling about anything that popped into her head. John couldn't help but laugh at the things that came out of her mouth. The only thing that was putting a damper on the evening was the fact that Maria was glued to his side with her hand rubbing up and down his arm asking for forgiveness constantly.

"You couldn't do something to help me out at all?" John asked as soon as Maria walked out of one of the staged rooms they were currently sitting in. "You know that I have no interest in her Al, why not help me out?"

"I'm sorry Johnny boy but this is just too funny. I told you that she wouldn't just leave you alone. I called it the minute you told me that story, but you just think you know everything."

"Al, I screamed at her. I terrified her. I have no idea why she wants to be around me at all right now."

"Because like you say all the time John, chicks just want you," Alaina said laughing and taking the chance to sit next to John for the first time since being in the arena.

"Good thing that the only one that I want is sitting right here enjoying my immense torture. How can I possibly love such a cold, cruel woman?"

"She is pretty hot," Randy said interrupting the two. "I finally found you guys. All I get is a text that says 'I'm at the arena'. Not even where you are. I thought we were friends Ally. Why do you always make me work for everything?"

"Life is more fun that way Randall. Sorry, I honestly meant to tell you where we were but we were trying to sneak away from Maria. That woman must have been Special Forces or something because she is hard to shake."

"Oh, that woman will not just give up on John. She's got her eye set on him and she won't take no for an answer," Randy said sitting next to Alaina. He had never thought the three of them would be able to sit as friends and talk. He had thought she was everything that she wasn't when they had first met. It was only after John had left her on her own that he had gotten to know who she truly was. Sitting next to two of the closest friends that he had Randy finally felt like he could relax. He had hated seeing the two so far apart when they were meant to be together.

"I tried to tell him that Randall, but he just wouldn't believe me. He actually thought that she would just leave him alone," Alaina said unable to hide the laugh that wanted to bubble out of her. "I'm telling you, the man really knows nothing about women."

"He knows less than I do. I mean I taught the man the little bit that he knows. I tried Ally, I really tried."

"Alright guys, you do know that I'm right here," John said getting annoyed with the way they were talking about him. He knew they were joking but he couldn't believe that he had been so wrong about Maria. He really had thought that she would be leaving him alone from now on.

"How about instead of making fun of me you help me figure out how to tell her that we aren't going to be dating anymore?"

"I don't know John, how about telling her 'hey I'm madly in love with another woman so I can't see you anymore'," Randy said as if it were the most obvious answer in the world.

"Randall, he will not be saying that to her. I don't care how he feels about me, I will not be the reason that he rips out some poor girls heart."

"I'm not ripping out her heart. Right? Right?" John asked as he looked at the serious faces of Alaina and Randy. "Oh god, I'm really going to rip out her heart," he said dropping his head in his hands.

Things had been so much easier when he was angry at Maria. He hadn't cared if she was hurting or scared. All he was thinking about was not putting his fist through the wall and causing incredible damage to the hotel. Now though, as he thought about it he knew they were right. Maria was a wonderful person who didn't deserve what he was about to do to her.

"John, I told you, I'm here whenever you're ready for me. I'm not forcing you to end anything with her. She's a great girl, you need to see how it all plays out."

"Al I'm not going to string her along when I know how I feel. I know she thinks we only had a fight but I can't stay with her. I thought that you and me were going to give things a try?"

"Johnny boy, I told you, I'm the first to bang down that door when you're free. All you need to do is get free."

"So, this just got incredibly awkward for me. I'm going to grab something from catering, wanna come with me Ally?" Randy stood and offered his hand out hoping that Alaina would take it. There were so many questions he had that needed to be answered.

"Sure, I could use something to drink."

"Maybe even something to eat too. You only ate half your salad at dinner, and I know you didn't have lunch or breakfast."

"Are you watching what I'm eating Mr. Cena?"

"More like what you aren't," John muttered avoiding looking at Alaina. He loved her with all that he was and it pained him to see her struggle with herself this way.

If Alaina heard his comment she ignored it, instead choosing to give him a small kiss on the cheek with a promise that she would be back in a few minutes.

"Ok Randall, lay it on me. I know you have about a thousand questions," she said once they were walking through the halls.

"I do, but I'm only concerned about one right now. How are you feeling about all of it?"

Alaina's long sigh told him he was right in what he thought. She was unsure, overwhelmed and fighting against her own emotions.

"I'm a little of everything I guess. I want him Randy; I want him so bad I really do. It actually freaks me out a little bit. I'm glad that you brought me out here though. As stressful as this whole thing has been on me I'm really glad I came. I got the chance to say everything that I haven't been able to say before."

"You'll be ok when I send you home tomorrow?"

"Honestly? I'll probably sit on my couch crying for a couple hours because I'm alone again. Then my mom will probably call, then she'll probably head over to torture me, and everything will be back to normal. I'm doing better on my own. I have good days and bad days but the good ones are more frequent then bad."

"Did you take what I said to heart? About seeing a therapist and getting some professional help to deal with all of this?"

Alaina sighed and shook her head. "I am not going to see anyone about this. Therapy helped me a lot when I was going with Joe, I know how I'm feeling and why. I'm doing ok Randy."

"Ally, you aren't eating. Everyone has noticed. That isn't doing ok."

"I don't know why everyone all of a sudden wants to watch me like a hawk but I'm fine! I don't need to be babysat, and I don't need to be treated like a child! I am totally capable of taking care of myself." She resisted the urge to slap him across the face for bringing up everything that she didn't want to talk about before she began storming off.

"Ally, wait up, please." Randy caught up to her in a few easy strides wrapping his hand around her arm. "Seriously, Alaina wait up. Look, I'm sorry; I'm not trying to get in your business I just worry. I saw how bad you were when you left. I had to force feed you Ally. You may not think that it's a big deal but I do."

"I know Randy, and trust me I didn't forget that I just—I'm tired of everyone looking at me like I'm about to break. I'm doing a lot better and I just want my life to be what it was before all of this mess."

"Alright, I'll leave it alone but please be careful. I don't want anything to happen to you."

"I know, and I'm thankful that you care so much. I'm ok I promise you."

Randy smiled and nodded letting the subject drop. He knew that it was pointless to push her but he also knew that she was lying to him as well as herself. The only thing that he could do for the moment though was watch from afar and make sure that nothing bad happened to her.


Alaina had almost forgotten how hard it was to leave John behind the first time. Watching him walk away from her at the airport drop off was quickly reminding her how hard it was for her the first time around. She wanted to break down, she wanted to cry, but most of all she wanted to call John and have him reassure her that while she was gone nothing about their relationship would change. That wen she called he would answer, and that no matter how many times Maria tried to get back in John's good graces she he would let her know that he was no longer interested.

Alaina didn't care how long it would take him to make sure that Maria knew they were done for good. She only needed to know that they would still be friends while they were both getting their heads straight.

Fighting the urge to call John before she even boarded the plane she passed her time texting her family letting them know she would be home in just a few hours. She figured if she did it before she got home she would not have to worry about the amount of phone calls and texts she would have to endure after hours of travel. She also knew that one of the many members of her family would be there to pick her up and ask her at least ten times during the car ride home how she was dealing with her split from Joe. She smiled and picked up her phone calling the one person she hadn't talked to all week.

"Hey Ally-gator, didn't think I would be hearing from you this week. Didn't you say you were traveling around with the company this week?"

"I'm sitting in the airport waiting for my flight. I'm trying to block out my mom and her many, many texts right now."

"Still driving you crazy with watching over you?"

"Like you wouldn't believe. I'm amazed that the woman who raised an entire family on her own cannot understand that I just might be ok on my own."

"Does she hate me?"

Alaina sighed and shook her head. Sometimes it was easy for her to forget how much Joe relied on her family. Her mother had taken Joe in as one of her sons becoming more of a mother to him than he ever had growing up. It was one of the hardest aspects of splitting up, feeling like she was taking his family away from him.

"No, she doesn't hate you. She doesn't understand what happened between us, but I don't think she can understand it. How do I explain to her that we just grew apart? That it wasn't this whole big fight that just ended things. I think she's looking for a grand explanation when all I can give her is a cliché."

"She'll understand it soon enough sweetheart. We know we're better off apart. Did you have a nice week away?"

"I actually really did. I'd love you to meet the guys one of these days."

"Sweetie, I don't know if that's really the best idea. You know that I'm not going to be their favorite person after everything we've been through together."

"Don't worry about it; I always stick up for you against the big bad wolf. When are you going to be home?"

"I got home late last night, took today off because I was traveling yesterday."

"Do you think that you could pick me up from the airport today? I just can't face my family. They've been all over me, I need a break."

"Yeah sure, tell me the time and place and I'll rescue you."

"Thanks Joey, you always know how to make me happy."

"We'll go for dinner on our way back. You can tell me all about your trip."

Alaina agreed even though she was unsure how much he would want to hear about it. They were still friendly with each other but she knew that telling him how she was getting over him and moving on to John would be awkward and painful for both of them. Still though, she knew that Joe would listen to whatever she wanted to tell him about the trip. He was a good man at heart, he was a good man to her, but he just wasn't the right man for her. He hadn't been since he decided to walk out almost a year before. Still feeling unsure about calling John she sent him a text before she had to turn off her phone for takeoff. Telling him that she was having dinner with Joe and that she would talk to him soon she turned off her phone and tried to fight back the incredible tide of emotion that had seemed to take hold of her life the past few months.