Hey hey hey peoples! i know its been a long time... sorry. this story is getting harder and harder to write. im just not feeling it so much anymore. anyway, here's my next chapter. its not as light hearted as the last one. its my attempt at been deep :).

thanks to all my lovely fans and reviewers including gaaras1girl, XxgaaramatsurixX, foxybunny, painterofemotiones, ect. oh and anonymous for which i shall refer to you as. thanks!

disclaimer: own naruto, i do not. hmmmmmmmmmmmm

Chapter 7

Matsuri POV

We were all significantly quieter after our encounter with the eight legged monstrosity. The experience had shaken us to the core. It was now clear that our expectations of life outside the comfort of a controlled training session need some major adjusting.

The first day of the three day trial was drawing to a close as darkness fell over the land. There were no stars tonight, only the soft glow of a hazy moon.

"We should take a break now, don't you think?" Sari shattered the silence. Yuudai nodded vigorously and fell where he stood. Now flat on his back, his eyelids sleepily drooped from the long day. Sari and I took a seat by his sides.

"One of us should keep watch." I said turning to Yuudai who made no acknowledgment at my words. "Okay… I guess that means either you or me." Just as we looked into each others eyes a chilled breeze wound through the trees whistling eerily. I swallowed nervously.

"How about we both stay up?" Sari suggested. I smiled warmly. Id much rather prefer neither of us getting any sleep then having to guard alone.

We sat back to back with Yuudai snoozing close by. With every twig snap, every rustle of the leaves, every creaking of the great maples laying siege to our camp, my heart skipped a beat. I could feel Sari jump too. The anxiety of the situation had caused my adrenaline levels to sky rocket. All my senses were in sync with the environment. My eyes had by now adjusted to the darkness expanding my visibility into the unforgiving wood. My nose crinkled as it picked up small traces of rust and I could feel the soft moss under the palms of my hands. An uncontrollable reflex to yawn over powered my control. The grand inhale brought in more hints of rust to the tip of my tongue. What is that? My mind raced for an explanation for the strange odor.

"Hey Sari?" I whispered.

"Yeah?" she answered.

"Do you smell that?" I heard her take a deep breath to assess the air around her.

"Yeah, its like metal or something, right?"

"Yeah. What could it be?"

"I don't know. Its really weird." we frantically searched the area with our eyes for the source of the abnormality. Then I felt a heavy drop hit the back of my hand. Rain?… no. I brought my fist closer to my face for a better look. The liquid was dark and stank of iron. I froze…

My head slowly tipped back to see the canopy above.

I screamed.

Gaara POV

"Oi! Gaara! You coming?" my sister yelled to me from the ground below. I stood up and walked towards the edge of the roof, strolled straight off the end, and landed easily at her side. The students three days for the second challenge were up and it was time to meet them at the tower. If they made it though, that is.

There was such a thin line between success and failure in the eyes of the shinobi. One moment the sky clear, the smiles bright, the love passionate, while in the next one slip can extinguish the sun. The line between good and evil is just as fine, though it has no sharp edges. It's just a mess of haze and uncertainty.

In the tower now I waited with my siblings and teammates for our proteges to arrive. I scanned my surroundings noticing several familiar faces from my previous trips to Konoha waiting for the same thing. Deep in my heart I knew some of them would linger here for hours for students who would never return. My heart sank at the thought of me as one of them.

One of the proverbial faces belonged to a man named rock lee. With his thick eye brows, reflective bowl hair cut, and ridiculous green jumpsuit there was no mistaking him for another. It didn't surprise me to see him here, supporting the youth of the leaf village. Feeling my stare on his back, he turned and gave an overzealous wave. I nodded then looked away. He was a good fighter. I liked him, but I small doses.

I wasn't long before the contenders returned to their masters one by one. All of them filthy and worn but glowing with pride at their accomplishment. A twinge of hope followed by a twinge of guilt came with each pupil who pasted through the doors. No Matsuri yet. Then, after what felt like an eternity, team Suna came bursting through the double doors.

Yuudai was first. He was beaming but underneath seemed shaken by the experience. Sari also appeared troubled but was relieved to be back. My pupil was trailing slightly behind the others. Her head was down, but when she picked it up, our eyes met. I was now looking into two pools of hot tears.

Kankuro patted his boy on the back as Temari wrapped her arm around Sari's shoulders.

"Matsuri? What happen?" I said with as much concern as I could spread on my words (which wasn't much do to my lack of practice).

"Well… well… we were…" she tried to choke out. Temari and Kankuro also listened intently. "staying put for the night but I looked up and… its was awful… in the trees."

"Spit it out!" Temari interjected.

"THERE WERE BODIES! DEAD BODIES OF OTHER GENIN SKEWARD TO THE TREES! SOMEONE HAD KILLED THEM AND DIDN'T EVEN TAKE THEIR SCROLL! THEY WERE JUST KILLED FOR FUN!" she screeched. I shuddered at how familiar her story sounded.

"Whoa really? That's messed up." Kankuro said.

"Yeah lucky for us they had the scroll we needed." Yuudai chimed in. "We got off pretty easy." he chuckled.

"WHAT?" Matsuri spat.

"Easy Matsuri" my sister begged. "I know that's something horrible to have to see but that's the life of a shinobi, right?"

"BUT BUT BUT, THEY WERE SLAUGHTERED!"

"I know, Matsuri. I said it was horrible."

"NO! YOU SAID IT WAS HORRIBLE TO HAVE TOO SEE!YOU DON'T EVEN CARE!"

"HEY! Don't talk to me that way! I was just trying to help! The truth is you're just going to have to get used to death. Deal with it or quit being a ninja!" my sister stormed off pulling Sari with her. Kankuro and Yuudai both followed in tow not wanting to be on the side receiving Temari's wrath.

Matsuri was crying even harder now. Her tears were staining her shirt and her face was now red. She wasn't looking at me and her hair hung like a drape between us concealing half of her face. I knew what she was doing, hiding. And I new why, shame.

She was ashamed that I was seeing her in this state, ashamed to have broken down in front of me. She felt weak. She's not weak, she's human.

I wanted to tell her that she was right. Killing for the sake of killing was atrocious. Life is extraordinary, life is sacred. No matter if it belonged to a best friend or a worst enemy, it had to be respected. Taking the existence of another should be a last resort and only after it had been proven necessary.

I wanted to tell her that thinking of life as a precious gift was something that made her stronger than she could possibly imagine and was a trait that I have coveted all my life but could never have.

I wanted her to stop crying. I wanted to comfort her. I wanted to, but I didn't know how. So I stood apart from her with my eyes closed listening to the rhythm of her quiet sobs.

Matsuri POV

My vision was blurred by the flow of sadness but I still got a glimpse of his face. My sensei's expression was hard and his eyes were closed. It was like he couldn't bare to look at me. He must have been embarrassed that the great Gaara of the desert was stuck with a blubbering pathetic student like me. Oh the disgrace I must be bringing him.

I used all my will power to try to hold back my tears but seeing the one who I wanted to prove my worth to the most turn away in disgust only prolonged my episode.

I know I should act strong and brave, but how was it possible for anyone to remain unfazed by murder? Those three Genin had dreams, they had futures. I knew no one would come for them. Several would grieve for the loss I'm sure but their bodies would remain apart of the canopy. There they would stay until their bones become one with the architecture, never to be put to rest.

That's the life of a shinobi. Thousands of ninja die everyday. Its all part of a big game the higher ups are playing, and we are the pieces.

Was that to be my fate? Left alone, broken on the battle field? Would anyone come for me? Would anyone cradle my limp form in their arms and let their tears wash away the blood from my face? Would anyone visit my grave to lay flowers upon my granite headstone and smile as they remember me and the good times we shared? I couldn't think of anyone.

I'm just another girl, another ninja, another name on a mission report, and I was disposable.

"Matsuri."

"Huh?" I said sniffling.

"It's time to leave now." his deep voice ushered me to him.

"Hai, sensei." I wiped my eyes with the back of my sleeve and followed him out of the tower.