The next couple weeks after that incident were pretty uneventful. Siesta didn't sneak into Saito's rooms anymore, choosing to instead flirt with him while he was eating, which was pretty normal.

Louise held true to her promise about not punishing Saito, and she was feeling happier about it by the moment. She wasn't as stressed anymore, and it seemed that Saito was pleased as well.

Saito was in an interesting mental state. He wore a mask of happiness during the day, acting like Louise's girlfriend and trying to help her out more like a familiar in his mind would.

But although it appeared that he was satisfied with Louise not punishing him anymore, her declaration just made him even more determined to punish himself.

Saito's arm had not yet healed. This was because of a habit that Saito had made of himself the day after the 'tower incident', as he liked to call it. See, Saito would mentally count the number of mistakes that he had made in one day, and make a cut at the end of the day for each mistake.

Unfortunately, he would always convince himself that it wasn't enough, that he needed to make another cut, and so when he would go into the bathroom to make two or three cuts, he would come out with eight.

Cloaked, of course. Saito still had that towel he used to cover up his second slicing, and would wash it when nobody was around, so as to not draw attention to his depression. He would wrap it around his arm both day and night, and it soon became like a second skin to him.

Every day, however, he wondered if he should start cutting on the other wrist, so that they would both be equally weak. It would draw confusion from spectators when Saito would practice with Derflinger and do amazingly with his right hand, but when the sword was in his left hand, suddenly have the sword be crashing to the ground as though the arm were dead. (Which it practically was, due to the blood loss that was being caused every day.)

Nonetheless, Saito would continue his self-torture in the absence of Louise, always crying to an imaginary voice and a ghost of Louise's former self.

And that was where he was now. Standing over the sink, wrist dripping already, he stared into the mirror, tears running down his face. An angry Saito and Louise stared back, which Saito knew couldn't be true; Louise was downstairs, still eating dinner.

"What do you want?"

Louise spoke. "Another cut."

And so it was done, and as the reflections laughed, Saito cried, which made them laugh even more, before they got tired and told him that that wasn't enough punishment; that he needed more. To which Saito would oblige, and the cycle would commence again.

Eventually, Saito looked up to see just himself staring into the mirror. He sighed, and picked up the towel from where it had fallen. As Saito wrapped it around his wrist, he noticed that he had blood on his sweatshirt.

Crap.

Saito, for some reason, only had one sweatshirt, so having blood on it probably wouldn't appealing.

He glanced at where it was, on the pockets near the stomach that Saito would rest his hands in when he was walking. There were about six drops there, and although they were turning purplish when meeting the blue fabric of the sweatshirt, someone was very likely to notice them and think(correctly) that it was blood.

I could wash it? No, that'd take too long...

Saito frowned as he rolled his sleeve back up to hide the towel. But as he reached down for a towel to dry his face off with, he had a sudden idea.

First, he washed his face, so as to disguise the tears. He glanced at his eyes, and saw that they weren't red from crying at all.

Perfect.

He then went to his and Louise's room and started pawing through Louise's drawer of clothing that she had outgrown, before coming across a small blue shirt. He closed the drawer softy and went back into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

A couple minutes and a few stitches later, and Saito was done.

He stepped out of the bathroom with a patch of blue sewn onto the pocket, covering the bloody spot. The patch had come from the shirt that Saito had just 'borrowed', and Saito figured that it was a pretty good disguise. If anyone asked, Saito would say that he had accidentally ripped it, and was patching it up until he could fix (AKA wash) it later.

Saito sighed, and threw away the scraps of shirt. He then unlocked the door, so that in case Louise were going to come in early, she could.

Saito didn't expect her to, however. She was always chatting or arguing with Siesta and Tiffania about who-knows-what, and would be up at around nine.

Saito glanced at the clock. So, in a half hour. Okay.

He briefly considered going down to talk with the girls, before deciding that he'd just be an obstruction. So he lay back on the bed, sighing and gazing up at the tapestry.

That's okay. You at least have me to talk to!

Go away.

What? I honestly get no respect around here. You never want to talk to me.

I talk to you enough when I'm cutting myself open in the bathroom every night!

Well, that's because you deserve it, for being such a lousy familiar. We never actually talk, like about other stuff that sucks about life!

Saito sighed, and sat up, rubbing his eyes.

Other stuff? I think that the fact that I can't do anything right qualifies as something that sucks about life.

No, that's boring. What's really funny, however, is that no matter, what you do, you're still adhered to that bitch of a master.

What?

It's true. No matter what you do, no matter what you say, you can't be freed from her at all. You're destined to serve her forever and ever. Unless...

Unless?

Unless you were to kill yourself. Which I'm sure you've thought about almost every day.

I have not!

Bullshit.

The voice was right; Saito contemplated suicide at least every other day, if not each day. He figured that if Louise wanted a real dog, he could just end it and she would probably be able to have a real dog as a familiar. But he always figured that when the time came to do it, he wouldn't have the guts, and so he contented himself with slicing his wrists every night.

Even if I had, she could probably just stop me. Wave her wand and all that.

Why not do it now? She's not here. You know where the knife is.

Saito did indeed know. Both himself and Louise had drawers that the other wasn't allowed into, and in his he had the knife. He could do it right now, like the voice said. Ten steps, a hand movement to open the drawer, and hand movement to stab, nothing to it...

Do it.

No.

Do it!

No!

Do it now!

No, I-

"Saito?"

Saito jumped. Louise had entered the room and was staring at him with a confused look on her face.

"Yes?", said Saito, maybe a little too loudly.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I- I uh... I'm really tired."

"You've been staring at the wall for the last ten minutes, not saying a word. Heck, you weren't even blinking."

Saito plastered a sly grin on his face and turned to Louise. "Wait. You've been just standing there, staring at me for the last ten minutes?"

Louise started to blush." I-I-I wanted t-t-to see wha-wha-what you were d-d-doing, you know? Like the m-m-master watching o-o-over her f-f-familiar!"

Saito stood up and nodded. "I see. You were staring at me lovingly because you could finally do so when I wasn't paying attention. Interesting."

Louise started to fume. "S-S-Saito! Y-Y-You know-"

Saito walked over to her and put his hand on her shoulders. "Yes, Louise, I know. I'm just so handsome that you can't help but stare at me. I get it."

Louise looked like she was going to explode, but instead just gave Saito a hug. "Whatever. Let's just get some sleep."

Louise went into the bathroom to change into her pajamas, while Saito waited for her in the main room. Suddenly, however, he heard a shriek.

"Saito!"

Saito jumped and raced into the bathroom, throwing open the door. "Louise! Are you-"

He stopped short in his tracks. Louise was top less, and although she had been staring into the sink, she was now staring at him, who was staring at her exposed chest.

"You pervert!"

"But you called-"

"Learn to check and see if I'm actually dressed!"

Saito stumbled backwards and fell on the ground past the doorway of the bathroom. The door slammed and Saito was left staring at the wood.

Well, I guess that's a mistake for tomorrow.

He shuddered, but quickly stood up when the door reopened.

Louise glared at him. "Now you can come in, you pervert."

Saito raised his hands in an I'm innocent gesture as he walked into the bathroom. Louise pointed to the sink, where Saito peered into and gasped.

Saito had forgotten to wash out the sink after cutting, so his blood was all over the white walls of the basin. It wasn't even little enough to lie about saying that he had pricked his finger on a sewing needle, so for awhile he just stared into the sink.

Louise walked up to him. "Saito?"

He paused, and then spun around to meet her gaze. "Yeah?"

"Have you... Have you been cutting again?"

Yes.

Yes.

Saito sighed. "No, Louise, I haven't."

"Because if you have, I want you to know-"

"I HAVEN'T!"

Louise turned to him, eyes wide from the sudden outburst. Saito gulped, and turned the faucet on quickly, watching the blood and water swirl down the drain.

"I'm sorry for yelling, Louise, but I... I haven't been cutting again. I don't know how this got here."

On a normal day, Louise would have pushed the subject, seeing as Saito had been the only one with access to the bathroom since when it didn't have blood in it, and so she found this suspicious. But given that Saito had scared eyes and, she assumed, was remembering cutting and the terror from the first time, she decided that she would bring it up later.

"Okay, Saito. I believe you. Let's just go to bed."

He nodded and turned off the faucet, and she made her way to the mattress, pulling him by the hand. They flopped into bed, and after a quick kiss goodnight, they were dreaming in no time.

Except for Saito. His 'dreams' were filled with knives and dogs.