One Night- Chapter Six
Chloe yawned as she got into bed, pulling the sheets tightly around her. The curtains were still open, weak moonlight filtering in between the streaks of rain still lashing mercilessly at the window. The streetlamp that normally illuminated her bedroom had failed, rendering it darker than usual. Any other night, Chloe would have appreciated this, but tonight the darkness didn't want to be her friend.
Plumping up the pillows, she lay down on her back, eyes fixed on the plain white ceiling above, achingly aware of the empty space beside her and the man sleeping downstairs on her couch.
She couldn't hear any movement on the floor below. The only noise was the steady drumming of the rain and the howling of the wind.
It took a few minutes before she closed her eyes, her body trying to hold out against the exhaustion that had been creeping up on her for weeks, or even months. She couldn't remember the last time she had slept properly.
Yes, you can.
Chloe shifted, trying to block out the voice. She buried her head under the pillow and screwed her eyes up, but still it tormented her, forcing her to admit that she hadn't slept properly since Dark Eagle, since… since she'd almost lost him.
…
A strong wave of cold air permeated the lounge, causing Jack to pull the quilt tighter around him. The sofa was surprisingly comfortable, and the room adequately dark, but he just couldn't sleep.
He could still smell lingering traces of her perfume, unsure now whether or not it was his imagination playing tricks on him. Always a light sleeper, the slightest sound jolted him awake each time he managed to drift off, and no matter how hard he tried he couldn't stop thinking of her.
Jack guessed she must have fallen asleep. Punching the pillow, he closed his eyes again but it wasn't happening. Despite having been tired earlier in the evening, his senses were now on full alert.
He thought about his car, abandoned on the other side of the road. It had been running fine all day; he'd put gas in it and checked the tyres. The engine had shown no sign of failing. Part of him wished the damn thing had just started, and then he could have driven away and spent the evening by himself, doing God knows what.
But another part of him was relieved the evening had turned out this way. Sure, they were in separate rooms but he could still keep her safe. And just knowing that she was upstairs filled him with a sense of… belonging… of calm… that he hadn't felt in a long time.
Pushing back the quilt, Jack got up off the couch and crept quietly out of the room. He was going to do what he'd told Chloe not to do earlier- have a cup of coffee. As he felt his way along the blackened hall, he figured that she would have another jar of it somewhere, despite wasting most of it earlier.
He found what he hoped was the kitchen and flicked on the light. The tiled flooring was cold, but he persisted across to the kettle, filling it with water and standing back to wait while it boiled. There was a clean mug on the draining board. Taking it, Jack placed it on the table before going in search of the coffee. He felt awful going through Chloe's cupboards, looking at all washing materials and uneaten food. He found what he was looking for after four attempts, and shut the cupboard gratefully. It wasn't his place to be making himself at home. Like she'd said, it was only for one night…
Jack cursed as he poured too much water into his mug. It cascaded down to the floor, collecting in a pool at his feet. He cast his eye around for a teacloth, finding one draped across the back of a chair.
The worst of the water cleared up, Jack picked up his mug and switched off the kettle. After much debate, he put the now dirty teacloth by the sink and turned to leave the room.
Chloe was hovering in the doorway, her hair mussed and her eyes bleary.
"Did I wake you?" Jack was now very aware of how long he'd been in the kitchen, and found himself wondering how long she had been stood there.
Chloe shook her head. "I wasn't asleep. Can't sleep."
"Me either."
"That coffee's not going to help," she mused, a hint of a smile on her face.
"Now who told you that rubbish?" Jack smiled back, taking in how adorable she looked in her tatty old pyjamas but not having the nerve to tell her so.
"Oh, some guy."
"Some guy?"
"Yeah, that's right."
"Did you want me to make you a drink?"
"No, I'm okay. Just…" She trailed off, looked down at the floor. "I just needed to get out of there for a bit. I often walk around the house at night, it calms me down, helps me think."
Jack pulled out a chair and motioned for her to sit. After a moment's hesitation, Chloe padded across the room and took a seat. Jack sat opposite her, his coffee between his hands in an attempt to warm them.
"What do you think about?"
"Oh, you know, stuff… work mainly… nothing interesting," she added hastily. "Don't think I've got some highly exciting social life that keeps me awake half the night." She blushed. "Sorry. You probably didn't want to know that."
"It's alright."
"Well, since Morris left me I'm pretty much on my own most nights. Sometimes Nadia comes over for a drink but she's got Milo so it's not very often…" Chloe sighed, cringing at how pathetic he must think she was. "But that's okay."
"Morris left you?"
Chloe took a deep breath. "Yeah. Again. Right after… well I thought he'd leave sooner actually… he left that day you… you came back after Dark Eagle." She hung her head as though ashamed, but his hand crept across the table and gripped hers, causing her to look back up at him.
"Not your fault," he managed to say, restricted by the lump forming in his throat.
She merely nodded. "Yeah."
He released her hand, mindful of her earlier reaction. What she'd done for him was self-sacrificing, selfless… and how had he repaid her?
"Do you hear from Audrey?"
It was as though she'd read his mind.
"No, not any more. She's in New York I think. Engaged." Jack recalled how Audrey had rushed to his bedside only hours after Bill had notified her. She'd never told the DOD, despite her strong objections to every aspect of the way CTU operated. Instead she had whisked Jack out of medical and into a luxury penthouse apartment in the foothills of Los Angeles, somewhere they had used to stay whenever they were on business in the city.
"It worked, for a while," he found himself telling an attentive Chloe, "you know, we tried to be happy. But what with China… and then the mission… she was already unhappy that I'd chosen to go back to CTU, and not knowing about Dark Eagle caused a lot of tension between us." He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "Anyway, so we decided that it wouldn't work, and she moved back to Washington, while I stayed here."
"Ever wish you'd gone with her?" The words came before Chloe had time to filter them, her tone emotive.
"Never." He looked her straight in the eyes. "It was the right choice to make."
"You seem pretty sure." Chloe looked down at her hands now folded in her lap. She hated that she'd been the one to mention Audrey; she hardly wanted to spend the night talking about the so called love of Jack's life. Yet she was finding it difficult to bring the subject to a close.
"I am sure. It wasn't working." Jack finished the last of his coffee and pushed his mug away. "I can't remember the last time we did this," he said, a hint of a smile on his face.
"What? Reminisce about our exes? I don't know about you, but I try not to do it too often."
"Good point." He was quiet for a minute, as though debating whether or not to carry on. "I mean… when was the last time we talked? Properly talked?"
"I don't think we ever have, not really," Chloe replied, a hint of regret in her voice.
"We should do it again."
Chloe stared at him incredulously. "You're serious?"
"Yeah. Why not?"
She shrugged. "Well, unless we get another evening of bad weather like this, and your car breaks down again while you're in the neighbourhood… then I guess it won't happen any time soon. CTU is hardly the place for social chit chat, is it?" she added ruefully.
The hurt that flitted across Jack's face did not go unnoticed. "I was hoping we could… make time… outside work… but if you don't want to then that's okay. I know it's uncomfortable talking about that sort of stuff anyway."
This has to be a dream…
"Jack… I'm sorry. I guess I'm just tired. I'd love to."
He smiled, sending butterflies coursing through her stomach. "Really?" He seemed so unsure, so vulnerable. "I would like that."
"Well, anytime you want to talk, just let me know," she told him, with more confidence than she felt. She could imagine it now… Jack pouring out all his problems with Audrey, with CTU, with life in general, while she sat there and soaked it all in, shouldering his problems as well as her own. She would then talk about her stuff, infinitely less important than his, which would make her feel even more worthless than she already did-
"Chloe?" She became aware that Jack had moved, was now stood by the sink. "I'm going to try and go back to sleep. Are you okay?"
She nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. I think I'll try again too. Can't sit in here all night, can I?" Standing up, she tucked her chair in and began walking towards the door. "Thanks, Jack."
"What for?"
"For listening."
He waited by the sink until he was sure she had gone back upstairs, before rinsing out his cup and returning to the sofa.
…
This time Chloe shut the bedroom door behind her. She held her hand to her mouth, holding back the sob that she was sure would escape given the chance. The tears burned the backs of her eyes. Climbing back into bed, she buried her face once more into the pillow and let them fall, a seemingly endless cascade of salty water. She didn't know who or what she was crying for.
Never did she think she would be talking to Jack about her failed marriage. She'd left out most of it, such as the fact that Morris had cheated on her several times, how he'd lied to her, hurt her. It wasn't important. It happened, and she had to deal with it.
She wiped her eyes, the worst of her sobs subsiding. She found herself able to drift off into a light sleep, one filled with a dream she knew she'd had before.
It was about Jack. He was in medical, and she was watching over him from the sanctuary of the hallway. Then Bill was there, and she was going back in time, seeing the images of Jack on her computer screen, bloodied and bruised and barely alive. Milo was saying something to her, and there was noise everywhere. She couldn't think. He was being carried into CTU, medics and agents running down the corridor. Someone held her back, just like they always did. And then suddenly Bill was back, stood at the foot of the stairs, his face ashen… she'd lost him… she'd lost him…
…
Jack tossed and turned restlessly, listening to the rain which seemed to be gradually subsiding. He'd fallen asleep, but woken almost instantly, as though afraid to be caught off guard even for a minute.
He shifted again, causing a cushion to fall to the floor, landing amongst the unruly heap. He'd almost closed his eyes again when he heard it.
Someone was shouting.
It took a few moments for the noise to register, and he began to think that maybe he'd imagined it; the wind obscuring his thoughts.
But then he heard it again, and this time the voice was more frantic, the sense of urgency pushing away the last fog of sleep still clouding his mind and sending chills running right through him.
