A breeze blew across Kagome's face as she pulled herself panting, out of the well. The cool scent of trees and grass from Inuyasha's forest was welcome. The future made me lazy. Kagome's arms burned gently from the exertion, but it also felt good to push herself physically after so many months drifting through life. She was still hesitant about confronting Inuyasha, but she hadn't realized how much she needed a purpose, a goal. And she missed her friends. Her heart felt, if not exactly light, at least less pained thinking that soon she would see Kaede, Sango, Shippo, and Miroku. Hopefully, everyone would still be in the village when she arrived, and not off hunting demons.

She felt guilty about that as she started down the path to the village. It was her job, her duty, to find the shards and purify them. Although she was sometimes more of a hinderance than a help in an actual fight, she had always been determined to work alongside her friends to correct her mistake. She had broken the Shikon jewel; she would make certain it was purified and made whole. Sango and Miroku would not have sat around for four months waiting for her to return, she was certain. They would have continued their quest to find the shards. Kagome hoped everyone was okay, and that running away like she had hadn't been too detrimental to the quest. Sango would understand. Miroku could be made to understand. Shippo…

Kagome's steps faltered for a moment. She had been so wrapped up in her own pain, she had not thought about what her absence might do to the little kit. He had lost both his parents, violently, and Kagome had been friend, sister, and mother to him since that time. She wished she had brought something from the future for him - some small gift to beg apology for any pain she had caused him. She squared her shoulders and kept going. Shippo had an incredibly generous heart, he would forgive her if he was mad. And she would do her best to make it up to him.

Her thoughts became anxious as she neared the village. What if Inuyasha isn't there? What if he is? The villagers working in the fields stopped and stared as she walked down the path. A few belatedly waved or called out surprised greetings, which she returned. By the time she passed into the village proper, she was feeling self-conscious. Women had stepped out of their huts and stopped their washing to watch her pass. It felt eerily similar to the first time she had walked through the village. Kagome tugged on the blue skirt she wore, wishing that she had thought to come after dark so that her return would not cause such a stir. She smoothed a hand over her hair and clutched Inuyasha's fire rat to her stomach to calm the weird twisting feeling that urged her to run back into the well and forget about the plan before she had to face all of the people she had disappointed.

"Ka-Kagome?" The priestess looked up. Sango stood outside Kaede's hut, her mouth hanging open in shock. Kagome managed a smile and a weak wave, and then Sango was flying towards her. The slayer gripped her friend in a fierce hug which left Kagome gasping for breath. "I was so worried for you, Kagome-shimai," she whispered. "Are you alright? I missed you so much!" Kagome pulled back, embarassed of the tears on her cheeks, only to find Sango crying as well. They both let out shaky laughs.

"I missed you too, Sango-shimai."

Miroku followed behind Sango and offered a wide, welcoming smile. "It is good to see you again, Kagome-chan," he said.

"Where are Shippo and Kaede and...everyone?" She couldn't quite manage to ask what she wanted to ask, and she had to look away from Miroku's shrewd gaze.

"Shippo went with Kaede to the next village over. Their priestess married and moved to her husband's village this spring, so Kaede has been caring for their sick as well. Shippo has taken to helping her carry supplies," he answered.

"You mean that he can't wait to pull his tricks on a village that hasn't seen them yet," said Sango dryly.

"Your lack of faith in his good intentions is most disturbing, Sango," Miroku said with a concerned expression. Sango turned back to Kagome.

"I've seen the results of enough 'good intentions' to- ack!" Sango whirled and slapped Miroku. His hand was still on her bottom when the hit connected. "Hentai!" Kagome smiled. It was good to be home.

Inuyasha was nearly asleep, exhausted after killing five demons in the last two weeks, and three of them had shards. It was good that they were collecting so many, so quickly, but he worried that not even the boxes provided by Bokuseno would be enough to keep so much evil from being drawn to the village. He had seen Miroku put a sutra on the last one, and hoped the monk did the same for the others. Still, attacks were coming closer to home, and until Kagome came back to purify them…

He settled into a more comfortable position in his tree. The sharp pain in his chest was dependable, if not desirable. She would come back...eventually. Kagome was herself, and she couldn't not forgive him - no matter what he had done. His heart twisted again and he closed his eyes and tried to relax. He had to believe that she would return. She told him she would stay by his side as long as he would let her, and Kagome did not break her word. She was kind-hearted to a fault and didn't know how to refuse a friend - even if they treated her poorly. Or if they were stupid, perverted pieces of wolf-shit. He snarled a little, half- asleep and moments away from rest, at the thought of Kouga. Kagome was his, and she knew it. She would come back. Inuyasha finally drifted to sleep, dreaming of his conversation with Sesshomaru.

"This Sesshomaru will tell you what it means to be inuyoukai. You will remain quiet. You will not interrupt. Your questions, if brief and not entirely ill-conceived, shall be answered at the end." Sesshomaru waited for objections, and hearing none, settled himself on the ground, his side to Inuyasha so they did not have to look at one another, and began, "Inuyoukai know their mates from the first scent. When a female is suitable for mating, our youkai will be drawn to her. In her first heat, her scent will change and call to males that are strong enough. A male will only scent one female in his lifetime, but a female's scent may call to many males. She will respond to the one who is strongest, the one she wishes to mate…"

Sesshomaru did not face him throughout the entire awkward recitation of scent-marking, courting customs, mating rituals, and a clinical - and surprisingly graphic - description of how to pup a female so that she would desire to engage in such activities again. Inuyasha decided that pretending it was not his brother was the only way he could have possibly avoided thinking about the fact that it was Sesshomaru...speaking about that...and being helpful. He was grateful for the Western Lord Asshole's aloof manner.

"You may ask concise, intelligent questions now - insofar as you are capable of it." For once, Inuyasha ignored the insult. He dug his claws into the earth and thought back to what he knew of his experience with Kagome. The images were fleeting, but the impressions were absolutely burned onto his brain.

"She, ah, the female is only aroused by the one she wants to mate?"

"Hnn," Sesshomaru replied, which Inuyasha took to mean 'yes'.

"What does it smell like?" Sesshomaru seemed to hesitate over that question, and the hanyou leaned forward anxiously.

"It is intoxicating," he finally said, quietly. "Her scent is like a fresh sakura blossom, drenched with spring rain and concentrated into a drug that dulls my senses and makes my youkai burn with need." There was something in his voice, his choice of words, that struck a cord in Inuyasha. Sesshomaru was not just repeating information like a schoolteacher to a particularly dull student...he knew. This was what he had wanted to know, what Miroku, simply by being human, had been unable to tell him. "It is sweeter and more addicting every time the male smells it." He gave an almost imperceptible shrug that ruffled his mokomoko.

The dream turned from Bokuseno's forest to Kagome: that moment when he came back to himself. His youkai was forced down and he was left with the impression of anticipated satisfaction, rampant lust, and snarling disagreement with himself for caging the beast. Kagome's scent overcame him. Clean, like a mountain stream. Softy sweet, like water lilies on a sunny day. Ume and crisp apples and faint ginger. Thick, heavy rice wine syrup. His eyes flew open and he breathed in through his mouth and nose. Spicy, hot sake flooded his system and sent a flare through his already overheated body. He felt drunk, drugged. The tip of his nose rested against soft skin. His eyes were inches away from creamy, pale smoothness. It was her - what he had wanted for three years. The dream diverged from reality, and he said her name with conviction.

"Kagome."

"Inu-yasha," she moaned. He looked up at her face, taking in the sight of her bare body along the way, and met her half-lidded eyes. Her lips were parted and dark red from his kisses. "Please," she begged. She had one hand in his hair, her fingers rubbing the sensitive skin of his ear. With her other hand she reached down to touch his face. Her purification sparked on her fingertips, and jolted him with a an arc of electric awareness.

Inuyasha sat up too quickly, tumbling half-awake off the branch and barely righting himself before he landed on the ground. Something had woken him up. There was a flash of recognition, and he sensed power, like… He sniffed the air with tightly leashed excitement. He could have sworn the well opened. The wind was in the wrong direction, blowing towards the time portal rather than bringing its scent to him. He trained his youkai on the area, feeling for the disturbance always caused by the magic of the well when Kagome returned. There was nothing. It might have already closed, but…

He shook his head. The dream had been so real, he was still half-aroused. He was imagining Kagome where she wasn't, because he missed her so badly. Every hour she was gone made it that much harder not to go to her. To listen to her voice, smell her feelings, to look at her and watch for what his brother had told him he would see. Then he could explain things to her, and he would feel blessed if he didn't completely fuck it up. Once she knew though...then he could show her what he felt. Lord Stick-Up-His-Ass had given him some surprisingly good ideas for how to do that. As if he needed more ways to fantasize about Kagome. Fuck. He settled between the roots of Goshinboku and closed his eyes again. He knew he should wait. He would wait. Hopefully, the dream would return, minus Sesshomaru, and since he was already on the ground, maybe he wouldn't wake up before it finished.

When Kagome finally worked up the nerve to ask where Inuyasha was, Sango looked angry. Miroku was the one who answered, although he cautioned her against approaching the hanyou alone. Assuming he was hanyou.

"We haven't seen more than a flash of red and white since you left us, Kagome," he said. "We know he has stayed around the village. There have been reports of an inuyoukai killing demons, protecting other villages, never more than a day's run - for him - from the well."

"Why didn't he...you haven't - he doesn't…" Kagome trailed off, unsure what to ask.

"We tried to track him down and speak with him," Sango answered somberly. "Inuyasha is incredibly powerful, even for a hanyou, and he has stayed hidden for longer than we have been alive. He didn't want us to find him."

"He hasn't been lazing around though," Miroku said with a smile. They were sitting around the fire pit in Kaede's hut, and MIroku stood to open a cabinet where the old priestess stored herbs. The medicine had been removed, instead it was filled with a stack of small wooden boxes, all sealed with a sutra. "We've been saving them for your return." Kagome concentrated, and was shocked to find the smallest glimmer of recognition.

"Shards!" she whispered. She knew her eyes must have been ridiculously wide, but, "There are so many! And how did you keep them hidden? I can barely sense them even now that I know they are there."

"The boxes do a great deal to mask their presence. I have never seen wood like it before. My sutra is just an extra precaution. As for the number, Inuyasha has been collecting them, we are fairly sure."

"Whenever we heard reports of an evil demon in the area, we would arrive to find stunned villagers speaking of an inuyoukai, and at least one box. It was always placed on the path that would lead us back to Kaede's village. He wanted us to find them." Sango paused and placed a gentle hand on her friend's shoulder. "He's been waiting for you, Kagome, I'm sure of it." Kagome could not stop staring at the shard boxes. He had done all that, alone, while he was waiting for her. It was wonderfully sweet that he had protected Kaede's village and… She frowned. He had killed all those demons. Alone. He never asked for help from Sango or Miroku. He didn't come get her. He faced all those demons alone. Baka.

"Let's get these taken care of," Kagome said, pushing back her sleeves and pulling out the shard vial from under her blouse. "Then I have to find a hanyou and give him a piece of my mind." With every shard she purified, Kagome got a little more upset. Inuyasha could have been seriously injured, he could have been killed. She nearly boiled over when Miroku casually mentioned that one of the shards had been reclaimed during a new moon. He attacked a demon with a shard while he was human? Idiots and their pride! Inuyasha's ego is big enough - he must store it in his head, his brain certainly isn't using the space.

She had worked herself into a self-righteous anger that allowed her to ignore the fear, guilt, and humiliation that threatened to keep her feet glued to the ground and instead go look for the hanyou. With twelve new pink shards in her vial, she set off into Inuyasha's forest, making her way to the Goshinboku, with the reasoning that it was a good a place to start as any. Inuyasha would hear and smell her from a mile away, and when he came to lecture her for wandering into the forest by herself, then she would let him have it. After she sat him a few times to get his attention, she would explain to him why ignoring help in life-threatening situations was not a smart idea. Then she would…

Her thoughts faded away as the God tree came into view. Leaning against the trunk, tucked between two massive roots, was Inuyasha. Her heart beat once, hard. She wondered if it had been working at all the last four months, or if it had been waiting to see him again. He looked exhausted, which might explain why he hadn't woken up during her noisy stomp through the forest. There were dark circles under his eyes and deep lines at the sides of his mouth. His hair was windblown, and his nagajuban was dirty. Stains, some of his blood, some she didn't want to identify, darkened the white cloth. There was a long tear in one sleeve, which surprised Kagome. Inuyasha's clothes were of demon-make; they had always repaired themselves in the past. He was on his own in keeping them clean, but they grew with him and had no need for patches. His hakama were filthy as well, although, being made of the fire rat they were in better condition.

She clutched his haori and crept forward slowly. The breeze had died down, and the forest was quiet around them. She held her breath as she finally kneeled before him, less than a foot away from his crossed legs. He looked terrible...and beautiful. Her chest ached seeing him again, and she was ashamed that she wanted nothing so much as to lean into him and kiss him. Take advantage of the poor man while he is asleep, huh? That is what got you into this mess in the first place! She knew she should be ashamed, but the pleasure, the absolute rightness of being near her hanyou again overshadowed it. She smoothed the folded fire rat in her lap and determined to wait for him to wake up. He obviously had not had a good time while they were apart either. He could enjoy his rest, and she would be there to make certain nothing bothered him. When he woke...then she would explain. Apologize. Grovel. Beg for his forgiveness.

Kagome was floating on her back in the water, his tongue was dancing on her skin. Inuyasha could feel a groan building in his throat. She tasted so good. He traced across her collarbone, down her chest, over the slope of her breast, finally pulling her pink nipple into his mouth. She was sweet and perfect; the texture smooth and slightly pebbled. He laved his tongue across the surface and reveled in her moan, "Inu-yash-a." He inhaled deeply and she smelled...worried?

The dream ended abruptly and Inuyasha inhaled again. Kagome was there and she was worried, even afraid, sad, and a little bit...angry? He opened his eyes and his heart beat once, hard. She was sitting on the ground, well within reach. Her head was bowed and her hands were occupied with smoothing over the fire rat in her lap. Kagome is here. He took another deep breath, sorting through her scent in the back of his mind while his attention was focused on her. Fuck, she smells good. Her skirt was blue, but short like her school uniform. How the hell did she get prettier? Her feet were tucked to the side, in a pair of the white tennis shoes she sometimes wore at the shrine. Flowers. Sunshine. Ume and bitterness and apples. Camphor. She smelled like everything. She smells like Kagome. She had bathed that morning, her hair was still damp and lightly scented with her future soap. She wasn't doing anything but sitting there and it was still so much better than his dreams, because it was real. His heart lurched again. She had come back, just like she promised she would. She came back to be with him. Even if she might think he had done…

He swallowed and sat up slowly. She came back, because Kagome was the best person he had ever known. No matter how she felt about it, what he had done, she still came back. He had been waiting for almost four months for that moment, for his opportunity to say...everything. He needed to apologize. He needed to tell her why he wanted to do it again. He needed to smell her, dammit. He needed to hold her and bury his nose in her neck and inhale Kagome. He needed to feel her next to him and actually hear her, scent the truth, when she told him she wanted to stay, that she forgave him, that she maybe even wanted to...to be with him.

"Inuyoukai know their mates," Sesshomaru had said. He knew her. He knew what Kagome was to him, to his youkai, to his heart. He knew what he wanted from her. If she didn't want the same, if Sesshomaru was wrong or if humans didn't have the same reaction as youkai…he had to know either way. If she wanted less...he would take whatever she would give. It would hurt like hell, but it was better than being without her. Either way, if he never asked… Grow a pair you fuckin' coward. He snarled.

Kagome looked up at the sound and her eyes widened. "I, ah, Inu...yasha." They stared at each other for what might have been the longest minute of the hanyou's life. Her eyes were so blue, bluer than he remembered. She's so fuckin' beautiful. He opened his mouth to speak, but she beat him to it. "I'm sorry," she blurted.

"I didn't- wait. What?" She was sorry? He frowned. This was his apology, dammit. He'd been working up the right way to do it for months, and she had to go and ruin it. Baka. Kagome's hands fluttered in the air nervously and the smell of ume and bitter herbs increased.

"I know I shouldn't have, and you probably hate me forever, I'm sure you're embarrassed - kamis know I am - and I took advantage, and I shouldn't have, and you aren't responsible for what happened so I hope you don't feel like anything is your fault and you didn't hurt anyone but I still should have done - but I couldn't the first time and I tried but Tessaiga-" Inuyasha's head spun, and he wondered if she had learned not to breath while she was away. She took advantage? "-and I wanted to do more and it felt so good and I have loved you so long but you never wanted me and I felt so awful because Miroku could see us but I-"

"You love me," he interrupted. Inuyasha felt like he had simultaneously been kicked in the head and handed an endless bowl of ramen. Her rambling abruptly ceased. His eyes found hers, and she was blushing hotly, but her scent was changing too. The bitter herbs and ume were even stronger, but something else was rising beneath that. Like steam from hot rice wine. A shot of excited hope flared in the empty hollow of his chest. He tried to tamp it down. Of course she loved him, she had said so before. The important thing was if she loved him, or just loved him. "You...wanted to do more?" He held his breath, then nearly slapped himself for his stupidity. Hard to scent her if you don't breathe, baka. He sniffed deeply, watching her face and trying to understand what she really meant, underneath her words.

"I, ah-" She looked away and muttered to herself. Of course, with his hearing, Inuyasha didn't miss her words, "Coward. Just tell him. He'll either hate you or he won't." Hate her? He couldn't hate her. Kagome could tell him that she had decided to mate Kouga and wanted him to babysit their pups and he wouldn't be able to hate her. Of course, he'd rip off that stupid wolf's balls and feed them to him before he let him touch Kagome, but he couldn't hate her - even if she wanted the mangy -

Inuyasha took a deep breath, again. He let her scent calm him down before his wild temper got him too angry to listen and instead he ended up doing something stupid. Like accusing her of wanting to have sex with Kouga and then marking her right there in the woods. Marking her..right now… His teeth on her neck...his hands on… She was his. A rising tide of youkai made him shake his head and force his demon back down. The one thing he seemed to agree with his youkai blood on would only get him into trouble right now. He needed Kagome to say it first. He needed her to understand what had happened. Then he could...with his teeth...and her throat…

"I'm sorry I took advantage of you, Inuyasha." Kagome's formal, stiff words interrupted his train of thought. "The first time, on the mountain, was to calm down your youkai. But the second time was inexcusable, I should not have used you for...that. Gomen, Inuyasha." She folded her hands together and bowed, as deeply as she could from a sitting position. She remained folded over, and it took the hanyou a moment to process what she said and realize she was waiting for him to accept her apology. Camphor and salt had creeped into her scent and slowly masked the ume and sake.

"Fuck, Kagome, what the hell are you sorry for?" She stiffened and slowly rose. Fuck yes, he thought with satisfaction. Her face was still salty, but the smell of sadness was dispersed with biting ginger as she narrowed her eyes at him. I must be crazy to love that smell so much.

"You stupid-" she cut herself off and an expression that Inuyasha had never before seen on Kagome washed over her features. Shame. He felt his ears lay down against his will and a whine rose in his throat. Kagome should never feel that. He wrestled with himself, trying to find a way to shake her out of it without making her angry. "You don't remember anything, no, of course you don't." She closed her eyes and the sad smell returned, even stronger. "When I gave you Tessaiga, in the camp...when you woke up we were...you were…"

"Licking you," he supplied. Heat flared in his belly at the memory, but he was more interested in the way her blush intensified and the smell of sake grew stronger.

"Yes." She sounded like she was strangling herself. "Your youkai...even on the mountain...he recognized my scent, I think. He - you, ah, he sealed my wounds. He seemed to think…you and I…" She waved her hand between them in a vague gesture. We needed to get Tessaiga back, but he wasn't interested in anything but…" That smell, he hoped more than anything in the world it was arousal, grew stronger as Inuyasha listened to her telling of his time as a full-demon. He had hazy memories, images, of some of that time, but as she talked they became clearer. It was almost as though his youkai could remember for him when she spoke. "I promised him...some things…"

"I understood you? You could talk to me?" Inuyasha was almost distracted from his goal by that revelation. His youkai had never listened to anyone before. The way Miroku had described him during a transformation, Inuyasha had assumed that he couldn't understand - that he was little better than an animal in that form.

"He, you, seemed to. He didn't speak much, but when I, ah-"

"I talked?"

"You sort-of...barked and growled a lot. You didn't use many words: mine, territory, den, ah...mate." She hurried on before he could ask her about that last one. Inuyasha was still reeling from the discovery that he wasn't completely senseless as a full-youkai. "I tricked you into going after Tessaiga. I promised…I promised-I'd-have-sex-with-you," she finished in a rush. Her face was beet-red and her eyes were screwed shut. "You were very...handsy, but then when you got your sword back…"

"I didn't remember," he finished quietly. He felt a twist of guilt. If she didn't want him, then what he did was… Inuyasha still wanted to know how Kagome felt about the idea of being with him, but he was also awed by her willingness to do anything to keep him safe. She had bargained with everything she had to...she had bargained with a blood-thirsty youkai. "You-" he began furiously, but she out-talked him.

"Then after the village, you were pretty much the same way. You seemed to kinda recognize Sango and Miroku too, so I told you they were pack." Inuyasha blinked in surprise. How did she know-? "You healed me up again, and then you got, er...you seemed to remember...what I said." She let out a shaky breath and met his eyes. "I, I've wanted you for a long time, Inuyasha. When you acted like you wanted me too, I didn't care that it wasn't - that you weren't thinking clearly. I could have stopped you sooner. Tessaiga was right there. I let you stay like that, even though I know you don't like losing control of your youkai, just so I could be with you." Her voice dropped to a near whisper, "I just wanted you to kiss me...to want me. A, kamis, Miroku saw you licking me and I didn't even care!" She covered her face with her hands and mumbled, the shame and sadness strong in her scent, "I am so sorry, Inuyasha. I understand if you can't forgive me, if you...hate me."

Inuyasha couldn't stand it anymore. He reached out and yanked her into his lap. She jerked against his chest with a startled yelp, but didn't fight him. Her ass settled between his legs, her hip pressed against his groin. Her shoulder rested against his chest, and he tucked her head under his chin. He folded both of her hands in one of his own and pressed them against him.

"You got nothin' to be sorry for, baka," he said quietly. "Don't you be feeling bad over something that I wanted too."

"But you-" she tried to lift her head and he snapped his teeth at her.

"Shut up, wench. It's my turn to talk." He took another deep breath, his nose pressed into her hair, and sighed at the peace that washed over him. "You think I let you follow me around lookin' for shards 'cause I just love to listen to you yap at me? You think I let you sit me, that I go outta my way to find you hot springs, that I don't kick that little runt all the way to the mainland 'cause we're friends?"

"We're not friends?" Camphor and salt exploded in his nose and he could feel her taking a deep breath, preparing to sob. Stupid half-breed!

"Fuck! No! That's not what I meant, Kagome! Of course we're friends, you're the first friend I ever had. My best friend," he finished quietly. She still smelled sad, but she was sniffing, instead of wailing. "I protect my friends, Kagome. But I sure as hell ain't gonna carry Miroku or Sango around on my back. I do things for you 'cause you're more than my friend. I, eh, I-" he swallowed, mentally trying to kick himself into finishing what had to be said. His ego came to his rescue. "Keh. I love you, stupid wench. I got all...handsy," he pronounced the unfamiliar word carefully, "'cause I wanted to. I guess it don't matter if I'm hanyou, human, or full-youkai, I want you." He squeezed her gently to emphasize his point and pressed a kiss to her hair. "I don't remember exactly what happened when I lost Tessaiga, but I do know you sure didn't make me do anything I didn't want to. When I woke up…" He paused and tried to get ahold of himself before Kagome realized just how much he wanted to reenact his time with her as a youkai - preferably without any clothes. "I had your blood in my mouth. You were right there, naked, and I could smell you… Fuck, Kagome, I didn't know what had happened or how far it went. All I knew is that as a youkai I had finally gotten where I've wanted to be for three years."

"Licking up my blood?" she squeaked. He let out a surprised bark of a laugh. To hell with controlling himself. He'd been doing that for three years and it had screwed things up so bad that he might have scared off his mate - his Kagome. Hiding behind his anger and pride was over. If he wanted to have what his youkai wanted, what Sesshomaru had so...strangely...described, what he wanted, Kagome… then he had to tell her. There could be no room for misunderstandings. He let his voice drop an octave and leaned down to her ear.

"Between your legs, Kagome."