Chapter 7
Things are really peaceful now, well that is until someone mentions Gale in front of Nona…..I'm in the office. I'm always in the office, or on the field, but I'm always happier that way, so it's okay. Well maybe I'm a little exasperated by Nona's unending Gale gushing; did I sound that silly talking about him in my head? I suppose I must have. I remember when I would have done just about anything to feel his lips on mine…it's funny…most men who act like they are worth their weight in gold and treat women more like food than like people don't really make much of an impression on me. But, I ran into Gale today earlier….actually Nona and I both did. Gale is something more than he acts, he is not just using women for the joy of it….actually I don't think he enjoys it at all. I guess if I'm really honest with myself I still feel a lot more for Gale than he knows…..just not as loudly as Nona.
But…if I really loved Archtur how can I have feelings for anyone else so quickly? It must be a passing attraction. Gale is a good guy, he's someone I knew back in District 12, and of course it must only be natural that there is some draw to him for me. He is familiar, that's all there is to it….Gale Hawthorne is just not someone that I can be romantically involved with. After all how much time of day did he really give me back when things were peaceful anyway? He called me a princess and spoiled, and who knows what else to other people. I wouldn't have a chance in the world at getting positive attention from him.
Look at me going on about Gale…..it's time for me to be productive and cut this out. Who really has time to go on like this? I sure shouldn't be.
Since Nona and I ran into Gale that sad look in his eyes keeps haunting me. Next time I see him I need to offer to be a friend, a confidant. I can see that he is lonely and hurting from something. Who knows what though, we have all lost a lot…..but I will show him that there is now so much to gain. Yes…I did come back today and write more about Gale after I spent the majority of the day thinking about him….but I was productive. I was just contemplating the emotional state of an old acquaintance. He did bring us strawberries, and I did drop off medicine for his back after the whipping he had for hunting. We are friends, we help each other, and it's what you for a friend. Why do I feel like I am writing this to prove it to myself more than to keep a record…I guess maybe I don't believe it? However, I know it really should be that way. I couldn't possibly fulfill Gale's needs when it comes to a woman…..I already know I'm not satisfying….because of how I let….him down. It's been a while since I've really thought too much about it. It's weird though, I don't feel so bad about it after having run into Gale and after rebuilding friendships that fell to the wayside while I was with….him.
