All right I know, you hate me, I hate me, I cried a little writting this, of course I didn't think I'd dish out as much as I did for this chapter, I guess it was just the atmosphere for the story.
Once again you all deserve my gratitude for your wonderful reviews that keep me updating:
kattylin
TentenPanda
HPBabe91 (Feel the power of angst, I heart you too for your reviews they help with the updating)
Wolfgirl21 (That's not true at all... there's nothing I want more than for Sasuke to whisk Sakura on a white... okay not to that extreme)
Ur2tRoUbLeSoMe90
Sirona of Arabia
sleepykittycat (Oh My God, so was I... well, I was listening to the CD Moulin Rouge! I was at the second Nature boy, that part where she whispers 'I love you' just kills me. I like that: Passionate ninja sex. And just to clear it up some, its going between past, present, past)
koolerthancool (I actually felt that hug, my shoulders just mushed in, they are together… just not publicly)
Kenya (Everyone does)
Baka Kunoichi
Spread-My-Wingz-And-Soar
When both our lives are going in separate directions…
Sasuke put his son to bed, the boy was protesting that he was not sleepy at all; that the sun was still out and that he was too old to be going to bed so early.
Yes, the sun was still out and yes, he was older now, but rules were still that he went to bed at six on the dot. Sasuke pulled the covers up and sat down on the bed. Shoichi had a petulant pout and his arms crossed over his chest.
His son was defiant, but at least he didn't have any brothers to contend with, Sasuke thought that Shoichi really wanted siblings, someone he could play with, fight with… but Sasuke hardly touched the woman a piece of paper claimed to be his wife.
He felt bad and sorry. "Hey, look at me." Shoichi refused and Sasuke sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Letting his hand fall back onto his lap, he used his other hand to ruffle his son's dark locks. "If you go to bed now, tomorrow we'll spar, just you and me."
That caught Shoichi's attention, midnight black eyes met obsidian and small hands pulled on Sasuke's wrist. "Promise?" he asked, hope in his eyes and voice. Sasuke nodded, "And will you help me with my Gokakyu no Jutsu, I can almost do it." Sasuke's eyes widen and then he chuckled and nodded.
"Yes, I promise, tomorrow, now stop complaining and go to sleep." Shoichi nodded, rolled onto his side and closed his eyes to go to sleep. Sasuke switched off the lamp and headed out of the room. He closed the door, leaving it ajar and headed into the kitchen.
She was sleeping at the table, her face in the fold of her arms over the papers spread over the tabletop and her long black hair fanned out around her. Sasuke looked at her for a moment and then headed for the front door, hands in his pockets.
He stood at the gates of the Uchiha mansion and toyed with the idea of going to Sakura for at least an hour. So many things played into why he should just stay home- home, was this really a home? There was a father, a mother, a wife, a husband, and a child, a son… he always wanted a son, he always wanted to restore the greatness that was the Uchiha clan and yet…
This was not how he wanted it.
He didn't think that Sakura would come to mean more to him, more than a friend, he didn't think she would become so beautiful that all he saw was her, he didn't think, he never thought and that was his problem, he always went headlong into situations without thinking things through.
He looked back at mansion; the only light on was the kitchen light where he left his sleeping wife.
Sasuke walked down the half-empty streets of Konoha, the shops were closing up and people were heading home from the long day. He walked through the streets like a ghost, hardly getting any recognition, maybe a glance here and there, but not much else.
He was one of Konoha's many great weapons, but now they had his son or they hoped to have his son. The Kekkei Genkai had not yet awakened in his son, but he still had time, Sasuke's Sharingan had not wakened until he was twelve.
Looking up at the darkening sky, he saw the first star; it winked like a diamond against a dusky blue canopy. He lowered his gaze and stopped in his tracks. Sakura and Naruto, they were leaning against her front door. One arm wrapped around her waist while his right hand cradled the back of her head.
Her arms draped over his shoulders, holding loosely to him as she relined against the door. Their lips pressed together, moving slowly against one another. Sasuke watched as she opened her mouth for him, the tip of their tongues touching before his tongue moved in more, caressing hers as he pressed a little firmer against her body.
Sasuke looked shocked for a good few minutes before his knuckles cracked loudly in the tightening of his fists and his brows creased and his jaw clenched, his lip lifting the way an animal's did as a warning when it felt threatened.
Naruto pulled back, looking at Sakura's tranquil face, her eyes closed and her lips parted, her breathing a little uneven. He pushed her hair back from her cheeks and he kissed the corner of her eye. He whispered something in her ear and when Naruto leaned back, Sasuke could see her faint smile and she nodded as she reached her hand for the doorknob.
Sasuke watched as Naruto retreated, heading in the opposite direction, never seeing Sasuke. Sakura stumbled backwards into her house and closed the door behind her. Sasuke stepped forward, the moon made its appearance, nothing but a white crescent in the sky above.
He waited until Naruto disappeared around the corner before Sasuke entered her home uninvited. He closed the door behind him and looked down at her sandals; he removed his boots and stepped into the living room. The light was on in her bedroom and bathroom.
Sasuke moved to the sound of running water and he looked in to see her brushing her teeth, in exchange for her day clothes she wore a white chemise with a pink ribbon running through the top near the straps of her slip.
She was beautiful with all the colors of spring: pink, green, white, rose-gold. She mesmerized him in everyway, keeping him in a dazed state, he felt drunk, like his head was all foggy.
Sakura bent over the sink and spit, she brought the cup of water to her lips, swished, and spit again before emptying the cup and wiping her mouth with a facecloth. It was not enough; he did not think it was nearly enough to wash off Naruto's presence.
He cleared his throat and she turned, a little startled. "Sasuke-kun, you startled me." she folded her arms about her as if she were self-conscious that she was in nightgown. He shook his head, and stepped inside the bathroom and turned the water off.
He grabbed her wrist and pulled her, she stumbled forward and he pressed her against him, she looked up at him as he looked down into her eyes, his brows still furrowed. She asked him what was wrong.
Sasuke closed his eyes, brought his hands up to frame her face, pressed his thumbs to her lips, and started rubbing them across her mouth, as there was something still on her lips. She looked confused and he opened his eyes again, he looked irritated. "Fuck, Sakura, don't ever let me see you kiss that dobe again, I can't stand it."
She blinked up at him with her doe-like eyes and he pressed his lips to hers as if to rid Naruto's kiss from her mouth. She closed her eyes and opened her mouth when he pulled away, dragging his lips from hers to her cheek and over her ear. "Sasuke-kun," He traced her curves with one hand over the soft cotton fabric of her nightgown.
"What did he say to you?" she blinked, it took her a second to realize he was still talking about Naruto.
"Nothing," she insisted, that was a lie, but then so was everything in her life. It did not matter what Naruto had said to her, not to her at least, it was trivial.
"He had to say something, to make you smile like that." She pulled away and their eyes met, she was surprised to see that his eyes were blood red with three specks of black in each eye. Was he that mad about seeing Naruto kiss her and whisper to her that his Sharingan just automatically activated?
He leaned that painfully handsome face over hers, the long forelocks of his ebony hair tickling her cheeks. He cupped her face and pressed his mouth to hers, shielding the color of his eyes with long, dark, thick lashes.
Sasuke kissed her hard enough to bruise her, force her mouth open and he took advantage of her open mouth and slipped inside. Sakura could feel the muscles of his mouth, jaw, and his neck working as he held her tightly, exploring her, possessing her.
His kiss was a metaphorical fire that ate at the trees of a forest until it no longer needed the fuel and seemed to take on a life of its own.
She held his face, pushed him back, and pulled away, panting. She saw his ruby red eyes and swallowed. "You were spying." he moved one hand and pressed his finger to the space between her eyes, soothing his finger over.
"You're angry with me."
"You're spying on me, I have every right to be angry with you." she was trying not to frown; she could feel the tension between her brows.
"Not spying… chance observation. You seemed to be enjoying yourself." there was a hint of spite in his low velvety voice. "Sorry, I don't like sharing you." The apology was insincere, he was just trying to show off how pissed he was about witnessing such an intimate kiss between a man he thought to be less in everything.
"Oh and I do?" there was a wicked grin parting his beautiful mouth. She could tell there were questions he wanted to ask, but did not want answered, did not like what the answers might be. She could take care of that grin on his face, she had a power over him and she was aware of it.
She slid her hands under his shirt and touched him, up his flat muscular stomach to his smooth, hairless chest. She smoothed her hands over his shoulders under the indigo shirt; it was as though blue and black were his favorite colors in whatever hue.
He closed his eyes and a soft moan escaped him as she kissed the center of his throat, felt him swallow. She licked up and under his jaw, felt his head tilt to one side, exposing his throat, giving her more access to work her magic.
The smell of him intoxicated her, she could smell soap and aftershave, cool, crisp, clean… it made her knees weak, he had a power over her to and he knew it. Her hands slid over his shoulders, his back, pulling him against her. They kissed, her mouth opening to him again; her grip on him loosened and he fell, in a slow glide.
He was on his knees, moving his hands to her calves and moved his hands up, rubbing her legs and her thighs until he was at her hips. His fingers hooked into her undergarments and he pulled them down to her ankles, she stepped out of them, kicking them across the smooth floor.
He kept his eyes on her as he took hold of her chemise. He pulled it down until the straps moved off her shoulders and then it was all a matter of a few tugs before the chemise came off her body completely.
She closed her eyes as he pressed his hands against the small of her back, pressed a wet kiss to each hipbone and her stomach above the navel before standing and stepping back enough to lift his shirt and slide it up over his head in one fluid motion.
Sakura stared, knew she was staring, she had seen it all before and yet she could not help but stare, she watched as he worked on the button and fly of his pants. He was beautiful with faint traces of scars he never had properly tended.
Sasuke left the clothes on and outstretched an arm to Sakura, she stepped into his embrace and he tucked her against him. He kissed her ear, lifted her, and carried her to the bedroom just across the way. He lowered her onto the mattress and she scooted back, her knees pressed against her bare breasts.
He finally removed his pants and boxers. She looked away and he chuckled and moved onto the bed. "How do you mange to stay so modest after all we do?" she shrugged, meeting his eye. "Don't I…" he kissed her neck, brushing her hair aside "…make you feel good?"
His hand cupped her breast while the other pushed her legs down so he had better access. Her arms came up and around him as he stroked her with the pad of his thumb, making her nipple tighten and rise. He pressed a kiss to the erect nipple then swirled his tongue around the areola.
Pushing him closer, Sakura leaned back; he held her fast so she did not fall completely to the mattress. He slid his hand over her side to her back and up her thigh until he could feel her, not wet, not yet. When he pushed a finger into her, her breath hitched and he smirked, kissing his way up and stopped at her neck.
Sasuke had not noticed it before but now when he was so close and so aware of everything her he could smell the new fragrance. Vanilla and jasmine replaced jonquil and strawberries. He kissed her neck, under her jaw, her cheek and pressed his mouth back to her ear to whisper, "Why the change in perfumes?"
She was trying to focus on the question, but he was not helping, stroking her, slipping inside from time to time and creating a haze of pleasure. Yes, he made her feel good. He made her feel so good that she often considered his 'let's be together'. The 'why they shouldn't' factor always stopped her from just giving up and giving in.
"It was a gift from Naru-." his hand suddenly slapped over her mouth and he was pressing her against the bed, straddling her. He shook his head and replaced his hand with his mouth. She kissed him back as he deepened the kiss as if he were trying to make her forget everything but him and his kiss… it was working. "Sasuke-kun." she gasped as she felt him bring her hand to the smooth length of him.
"Touch me, Sakura." he licked a slow line along the edge of her cheek then brushed his lips along hers. Her hand slid over the slick hardness of Sasuke, he half-collapsed against her as she caressed him. He drew away enough for her to move her hand. She closed her eyes and he touched her face, gaining her attention. "No, look at me."
She moved her hand along him, up and down, applying the right amount of pressure to let him feel that she was touching him without hurting him. His mouth opened on a heavy pant and he knocked her hand away and pinned her to the bed, sliding inside her one tight inch at a time.
He pushed until most of his length was inside her and there was a stopping point. He began to draw himself out, slowly as if to tease her and he was moving back in, just as slowly. She watched the black commas within his eyes begin to spin, a slow turn at first.
There was no thinking. There was just the feel of him moving in and out, catching a rhythm that had her mewling like a cat. "Harder." she found herself requesting and he complied. He thrust into her so hard and quick that it tore a scream from her throat.
Sasuke stilled, moving just a quiver as if he had no control to stop completely, "Are you all right?"
"Oh, don't stop, don't stop now!" she cried, tears beading her lashes as she shut her eyes, pulling him towards her for a kiss. He never asked again as he drove inside her so fast and hard it left her gasping and writhing underneath him.
Something happened between his grunts and her cries, something she wished would have never happened. "Let's have a child, Sakura," he managed to say between heavy pants. "It can even be a girl just as long as she has your eyes, koishii." He rubbed his cheek against hers, thrusting deeper still, as if he wanted to force her very womb to open for him.
"Don't," she whimpered, "Don't say that." tears fell down from her eyes, coursing along her cheek, she was crying now, really crying. How could he be so cruel to her? How could he say they should have a child when he was still married and he had a son of his own? How could he do these things to her?
Sakura's arms came around him and pressed her upper body against his, kissing him hard, working her tongue over his as if steal his earlier words away and make him forget he ever said such a tactless thing to her.
She arched into him and a sense of fullness washed over her and swelled then burst and she fell away from him, but he followed keeping his mouth over hers as he came. He pulled back, smoothed her hair from her face, and wiped away her tears as he slid off her. She reached for the blanket, pulled it over her, and heard her shower running.
She closed her eyes only for a minute, but it was enough to send her into a warm void of sleep. She did not know how long she had been asleep but something was keeping her from sleeping until the next day, as far as she was concerned it was still night.
Sakura slowly opened her eyes, it was such a struggle because she was so tired, but she managed to do so and the first thing she saw made her jump into a sitting position and brought her to full wakefulness.
Sasuke's hair was wet and clinging to his face and he was leaning over the bed, kneeling on the floor holding his hand held up to her. She noticed his pants were back on but he was still shirtless. She brought her hands to her hair, pushing the pink tresses back and holding them in her hands.
"Fuck, put that thing away!" He had presented her with a ring, a beautiful ring, a beautifully crafted engagement ring. It was silver and the center diamond was oversized and overwhelming the other two diamonds, it glittered and the shine caught her eye, it was just as bad as if he had pulled out a kunai and held it to her with harmful intent.
He looked down at the ring and then back at her, climbing onto the bed as she pressed her knees to her chest. "I can't stop thinking about you." He sighed as if he had been thinking this over and practicing too many times to count, or maybe he had not practiced at all. He looked upset at her sudden outburst when her eyes focused on the ring.
"I can't stand all this sneaking around. I know I have a lot of bad qualities, I'm not a good, nice guy like Naruto, I'm headstrong, vindictive and on top of that I'm married to a woman I don't even love because of a child, but I need you and I need who I am when I'm with you."
That was a damn fine proposal if she could erase the fact that there was another woman involved she would have jumped at the chance to marry him. She would have been all over him and screaming at the top of her lungs, 'yes, yes, yes, lets get married.' however, the fact that there was a child and another woman involved killed the whole romantic confessional gesture.
"Sasuke-kun, slow down, in fact come to a full stop all together." the water droplets falling onto her knee darkened the blanket covering her.
"Sakura it's insane to go on the way we are, we're both adults and I know for a fact that you can't possibly love that dobe as anything more than a friend. I love you; you love me too, put your feet on the ground Sakura. Stop trying to hide in the clouds, come down and be with me. I love you, you're safe."
He grabbed her left hand and started to slide the ring on her third finger. She curled her fingers so he could not get the ring on any higher, emerald met obsidian. "You're blurring out Shoichi-kun, you're refusing to see the whole of him in the picture and how he'll feel. I know he means something to you; I see the way you are around him."
"He adores you Sakura, sometimes I think he's in love with you." that made her laugh, but she sobered quickly, shaking her head and looking down at his hand still over hers.
"I don't think he'll adore me for stealing his mother's position," she lifted his hand, the ring falling onto the mattress near her thigh. She kissed his knuckles then and put his hand to her cheek, kissing the palm once. She leaned forward, still pressing his hand to her cheek.
He met her lips and brought his other hand to cup her face; she broke away and bowed her head. "Sakura, this is right, I know you feel it too."
"Obviously you don't… I can't do this anymore, you're right about that, I think we should just quit, you know, like cold turkey." His hands fell away from her face and he stared at her, disbelieving what she said.
It was always hard to see past his cool façade but his mask fell away and shock was right there in his eyes that had bled back to their normal black long ago. "Are you… saying I can't see you anymore? What about Wednesday?"
"Sasuke, please don't make this any harder than it already is." he noticed that the suffix was gone, he had lost it when he first came back to Konoha and had to actually work to earn it back and after working so hard he lost again. She felt for the ring and pressed it into his hand. "Please go."
"Don't do this, you always wanted me, here I am."
"That was a life time ago, Sasuke."
"You still want me."
"Always, that's why you have to go." he tried to touch her and she ducked away pulling the blankets with her as if it were an expensive gown, holding it tight to her chest as she slid off the bed and stood in front of him.
"All I want is for us to be together. I love you. I love you so much. I would have done so many things differently. I tried, Sakura to not be jealous, I couldn't do it and then I met her and-"
"And what, she was your revenge fuck?"
"Sakura, koishii… please, let me… explain. I know there is nothing I can say or do to make up for what I did. I can't. You have to believe me. Please." He was begging her, how strange she made him act, he was completely outside his comfort zone but she made him crazy, she had said she was not punishing him, but it sure felt like it, her rejection stung most of all.
Sakura stared at him, moistening her bottom lip first; she looked uncomfortable, holding the coverlet around her body like a security blanket. He was losing her and he never imagined it would be over a ring. Sasuke always thought she wanted to marry him, how he wished he could just go back when everything was normal, to a time when her love would not falter.
"It hurt, I didn't know how much until I was gone and you weren't there and then when I knew, knew that you were involved with someone else… the way he was being everything I wasn't… I was thinking of my own pain, I felt abandoned and you know about my past and-"
"Is that it? Is that all you have… excuses?" He put a hand to his forehead, what was this? He was trying to explain and she was being… annoying, ever so.
"What am I suppose to do? Walk away, it shouldn't be too hard. It's what I'm good at, right?" He punched a hole in her wall, his hand gone. Sakura shuffled back, watched his back tense, his body cringe, his teeth gnashing.
"What are you doing, are you insane?"
"I've got to be, to let you walk away from me," she tucked the coverlet into itself and slid her hand around his arm and wrist.
"Can you unclench your fist?" he nodded and did so and she pulled his hand free, blood soaked his knuckles and she sighed. "Please don't do this again," she said looking over at his hand and her newly damaged wall.
"Do you really intend to leave me?" she kissed his hand the way his so-called wife would do if his son scraped his knee or elbow, she stroked it and in a way, the pain did tend to lessen. She molded her healing chakra into his hand and the wound closed up.
"Loving you is very scary sometimes, Sasuke."
"Please call me Sasuke-kun." she shook her head, stood up from the bed, and turned her back to him. She lifted up her chemise and pulled it on over her head, letting the coverlet fall away only when she had the gown back on, then she pulled on her underwear. She then lifted his shirt off the floor and handed it to him, it would seem that he had brought their clothes from the bathroom.
"Please go home, to your wife and son and don't come back… it's gotten too hard and I can't give you what you want." she leaned against the wall, turning her head from him, unable to meet his eye. "And I can't watch you hurt yourself."
He stood, watched a tear slide down her cheek, "Sakura."
"Please go." She let out a shaky sigh as he hesitated and then strode past her, pulling on his shirt and she slid down the wall and curled into herself as the door slammed shut. She was not going to cry, he did what he thought was right when he married someone else and she did what she thought was right.
She choked on a sob, it was really over… she could not stop herself; she screamed and put her hand over her mouth to muffle the sound as she fell forward, meeting the floor with her forehead, clutching her stomach and feeling terribly ill.
All she had ever wanted was Uchiha Sasuke and she had finally found the will to throw him out, she should be celebrating over the achievement, but strangely, she felt like she had not only ripped out his heart, but hers as well.
It was difficult to breathe through the tears, but somewhere during midmorning, she cried herself to sleep, alone on her floor, her face sticky with dried tears.
-Fin-
It's not over I swear, don't murder me, I plan to make it up to you in the next chapter... again, I beg for my life and now... LEGS DON'T FAIL ME NOW!
