*fenixfeather: that comment was perfection. my love for you is never-ending.*

*took it out of Amy's POV just for this chapter, it'll go back in eight*

Chapter Seven

So This Is Love?

Part I

As soon as Karma saw her she pulled her close and kissed her, moving her hand up into Amy's hair and holding at the skin on her neck, pulling her closer and wanting her to be touching her right there, right then.

"Mmmm, whoa," Amy said, pulling back from Karma and moving Karma's hand off her neck. "Karma, whoa," she said, wanting her to slow down.

"I know," Karma said intently, her eyes searching Amy's her chest high and floating, her mind in the stars.

"Are you okay?" Amy asked trying to stop her. Karma's hand had been shaking and she was holding it.

"I couldn't get here fast enough," Karma said nervously. Amy took her hand and pulled her into her room, shutting the door.

When she turned around Karma was at her again, holding her close with a hand sliding under her shirt and pressing her close by her back. Amy felt her chest rise and her hands come down to pull Karma off of her and make her stop. When Karma came at her like that it was overwhelming. It was like those old cartoons of Pepe Le Pew, that crazy amorous skunk who just wanted to devour that poor confused kitten.

"What is this, what's happening?!" Amy needed to know. She needed to know this wouldn't just be a one-time thing.

"I wanna try. I wanna be with you," Karma was almost begging with her eyes, almost pleading.

"Karma, you shouldn't have to try."

"You know what I mean!" Karma groaned, dropping her purse and turning around. She kicked her shoes off and threw her shirt off over her head in one swift motion.

"Whoa!" Amy said. She watched as Karma moved to unzip her skirt and wiggle out of it.

"Karma no!" Amy said, shouting.

"I thought, I thought you wanted this," Karma said, walking close to grab her again. Amy's hands came up to hold her off. She held at Karma's wrists to stop her. Karma was already trying to remove her clothes and get her naked.

"This is fast Karma," Amy suddenly felt like crying. It wasn't real. She should've known. This couldn't be real, not if it was rushed and impersonal and just skin on skin and a sexual experience without thought. This is how she and Liam had done it. Thoughtless. Emotionless. Just sex.

"What are you talking about?!" Karma moved her hands up to her ears and began taking off her earrings. Amy watched feeling nervous. She wanted Karma but not like this, not in a rush and as a result of a split-second decision to try.

"Karma no," Amy said. As much as she wanted her something wasn't right about it all.

"Hey, it's just me," Karma said, slowing it down for a sec and bracing Amy with her hands. She took her hand slowly up to Amy's cheek and watched her for a second, moving in close to kiss her. The kiss was soft and sweet, it was slow unlike everything else. Amy felt Karma moving into her, pushing her back until the back of her knees hit the bed and she fell.

As soon as she fell she rolled. Karma was going to fall down on top of her. Instead Karma fell onto Amy's comforter and turned around with a laugh.

"What are you doing? Why are you being weird?" Karma asked.

"This doesn't mean anything to you," Amy said hugging herself, tears rushing her eyes. She wanted to disappear. This couldn't be happening. This was somehow worse than before. "I can't believe this. This doesn't mean anything." She couldn't fight it, the tears just came. Just when she thought she couldn't possibly cry more the tears flooded her and came spilling out, dripping off her face and making her ill.

"Amy, no," Karma said, getting up from the bed. She was just wearing her underwear and she felt like an idiot because she knew she had done something wrong.

She walked to Amy but Amy stepped back. "Go. You have to go." Amy said.

"Amy, why? It's okay, we don't have to do anything-"

"Go!" Amy yelled.

Across the hall Lauren had heard Amy yell. She got up from the bed, her heart tugging her to act. She opened her door and came out to knock for Amy.

"Amy? Are you okay?" She asked feeling worried.

"I'm not!" Amy cried, still hugging herself. "But I will be."

"Amy…" Karma just stood there staring. She was dumbfounded. All she had wanted was to kiss her and kiss her hard. She thought that's what Amy wanted. What was happening?! What was going on?! "We don't have to do anything," Karma said.

"I can't be with you right now." Amy said, wiping her face. She couldn't look at her, she couldn't look at Karma not after that.

"But, what did I do?!" Karma asked feeling desperate. "Amy, tell me what I did."

"You didn't do anything, just go. I can't…" She breathed in hard, the way she only did when the crying became too much to control. She couldn't breathe she was having a panic attack.

Outside the door Lauren had been listening like a hawk.

"I'm coming in!" She yelled, hearing the sobs. She rushed to Amy and held her. From the state of things something had happened. Karma was almost naked but Amy was dressed. "What did you do?!" Lauren yelled looking over at Karma who was still standing there and wondering the very same thing herself.

"I dunno," Karma said, tears rushing her, emotions taking her down. No matter what she did she was wrong, she was always wrong.

Lauren looked up at Amy and held her face. "It's okay, it's okay…" Lauren said, pulling Amy's head onto her shoulder and holding her softly. "Come here…" Lauren said, she was crying now too. "Shhhh…." She whispered, holding her gently.

"I'm sorry," Karma whined. She was apologizing but she had no idea what she did. She gathered her close and left, getting dressed in the living room alone amongst the sound of her own sobbing and her own confusion. She squeezed her eyes with her fingers and wished she could just be different. Everything was always so hard.

When she left she sat in her car all night, never leaving. She didn't know why but she couldn't go. She thought of Amy inside and cried. And she fell asleep in the backseat all alone.

Part II

Inside it was hard too. Lauren had known it had been too good to be true. How often does it happen that love is actually answered with love?

She walked Amy into her room and laid her down on her bed, shutting the door and wrapping her tightly into the covers and into her arms.

"It's okay, it'll be okay," she tried to comfort her but Amy was lost and crying hard, holding her so tight and refusing to let go. Lauren just lay there hoping she was at least some kind of help.

It made everything worse that Lauren knew nothing of what happened. Karma had only been there for two minutes, that was all. In two minutes Karma was naked and Amy was crying to the point of hysterics. Lauren wasn't sure what to do.

She held her and pet her hair and she felt the tears on neck and her skin, Amy's tears. It was overwhelming her, she wanted to cry too. Knowing not what to do she decided to try something. In the darkness and the quiet Lauren began to sing a song. She started slow and then began to sing faster as Amy quieted.

"You, with your words like knives and swords and weapons that you use against me. You, have knocked me off my feet again and got me feelin' like a nothing. You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard callin' me out when I'm wounded. You, pickin' on the weaker man."

Somewhere in there Amy quieted and actually started to laugh.

"What are you doing?!" Lauren asked with a smile. "Are you making fun of me right now?!" Lauren stopped feeling angered.

"Are you seriously singing me Taylor Swift right now?!"

"Yeah, so, it worked," Lauren smiled.

"Ugg, I love you," Amy said, hugging her tight. She couldn't imagine being alone right now. Lauren had made her laugh so hard after all that had happened.

"You're such a jerk." Lauren said.

"i know," Amy said, still chuckling. "Keep singing." Amy said. "Please." She tucked her eyes into Lauren's neck and realized that she was actually on top of her. They were so weird. She exhaled into Lauren's neck and held at her with a hand on the other side.

Lauren sang and tried not to feel these feelings she was starting to feel. With Amy's breath on her skin and her hand on her neck and her body on top of her and her arms holding her tight and her sweet smile so close and the way that she laughed and felt safe, all Lauren could think was, damn. Damn, damn, damn.