Disclaimer: I have the right to remain the owner of myself, anything else belongs to zun; there will be no need for an attorney.

A/N: Doin' good... I feel much happier with how that previous chapter turned out than those before it... On with the show!

Y/N2: My, I would hope so. That was the first chapter of any worth!

A/N2: Yukari, stop talking badly to my past self. Do you want to create a paradox by way of talking her out of writing? She's very self concious, and did stop writing due to not a single good review.

A/N: Uuu... You're mean, me...

A/N2: Dammit! I'm not Yukari, I'm you!

Y/N2: Ufufu... Yukari is just trying to mess with you, dear~

A/N: ...

A/N2: Don't ask why I swapped bodies with the hag.

A/N: ...Rrrright... Anywho, can we get on with this? I have to wri-

A/N2: That's my job; you have already written it. Just look below us.

A/N: Wha- When?!

A/N3: Ohh dear... I really do need to remember how time consuming these edits are before I think that I can pull them off in a single day! Take 'round 5x longer than new material, you know. Why? I haven't a clue, honestly. Heck, the chapter was already big before I started on it, and now it's 2.7k! Jeez... Anywho, enjoy the show.


Author: Wahaha! I'm in your reading material, fixing your things!

Yuuka: That was idiotic.


Sunrise, Cirno's house, Cirno's PoV:

As I gently snored, I dreamt my usual happy dreams. Beside me lay a bunny-girl who was numb all over the place, and a bit blue in a few places. I had insisted that she could use the bed, but noooo... Unbeknownst to me, I had made things worse still by way of holding her close to me in me sleep, my wings poking her in various locations only just hard enough to not draw blood. As I slept, the heat was gradually drained from her body, making her state grow worse and worse.

In the distance, the loud blinding morning call of my feathered friend could be heard across Gensoukyo. "Chin chiiiiin~!"

With the sound that woke me up every day made, I began to stir, my eyes slowly opening. I sat up, my wings automatically returning to their usual position, while I groggily looked about. Man, do I feel hot today... Wonder wh- Ohh. Right. Slept next to a warm blood, didn't I? That'll do it, alright. Heh, she looks kinda cute when she's asleep, though...

I began to poke at her soft cheek, which I had forgotten wasn't supposed to be cold at all, let alone as cold as my finger. Heh, she looks cute when you squish her lip- Ahh! She bit me! I began to try and pull my finger from her mouth in a bit of a panic, and ended up ripping open my icy flesh, spilling a fair share of blood into her mouth. Crap, crap, crap! I just probably killed... her?

Instead of her breath hitching in her throat which I likely had frozen, her entire body began to ice over. This shouldn't be possible! ...Well, not without me doing anything, anyways... With the sudden strange happening happening, I began to panic a fair bit, trying desperately to figure out what to do. For the lives of me I couldn't figure out what to do at all and gave in to the panic that had been bubbling up within me by way of rushing off for help. Mystia's still awake at this time, so it'd de okay to bug her, right? Emergency situations call for that, right...?

Headed in the direction that the noisy morning chirp normally comes from, I soon arived at the Bamboo Forest of the Lost, not particularly getting lost due to flying over top of the thickets. Only an idiot would fly through the bamboo forest! Plus, if memory serves, Mystia's cave is easily seeable from above, if you know where to look... Upon ariving, I flitted my way into the cave, shocking the heck out of Mystia, who was in the process of laying an egg, not that I really cared. In my panic, I began to plead the half dressed bird for help at speeds far too fast to understand. "Mystia-help-there-was-this-girl-and-she-turned-to-ice-an-"

Before I could get too worked up, or run out of air, my feathered friend began to pull her skirt back up, and silence me with a slightly sticky finger to the lips, not that I had time to consider the horrifying why of the nastiness. "C-cirno, calm down, calm down! Now, tell me slowly, so that I can understa-" Not having any of this calming down business, I grabbed her by the wrist and ran off with her, before taking flight.

While my nocturnal friend was busy trying to get her tired muscles to keep her from being dragged over the very top of the thicket, trying to shield her eyes from the painfully bright sun, all while doing her best to keep her only partially buttoned skirt on, I was making record time on the trip home. Well, record time for me, that is; Aya and Marisa could beat my speeds any day of the week, and Aya could quite literally do it while sleeping. One time I saw her fly past me while snoring, I'm pretty sure. True story. ...She was also taking pictures at the time.

Or was that a dream?

Once we had made it to my home, I rushed inside, dragging my sleepy friend inside with me, as she had fallen asleep once there was nothing below her just about begging to impale her in a horrible place. As such she had lost her skirt somewhere along the way, and I was quite literally dragging her through the dirt. Being rudely awoken, Mystia began to slash about in a panic with her free arm, thankfully missing all the furniture around, the walls, and of course myself. "Whaz 'appening?!" Her feathers both figuratively and literally ruffled, she looked about wildly once we had finally come to a halt.

"Mysti, I took this girl in and... she..." Where'd she go? "Ehh? She had frozen right here..."

Rubbing a bit of sleep from her eyes, Mystia asked, "Maybe it was all a dream...? Cirno, couldn't you have... just..." Her eyes seemed transfixed upon the patch-work quilts that made up my makeshift bed, where something was moving about under the mentioned bedding. "...Cirno, I think something's in your bed!"

I turned around at the warning, and jumped backwards in a panic. "W-what the heck's in my bed?!" Watching as the quilt moved about as if it had a mind of its own, I quoted a page from Marisa's big book of effective warnings, although it was just as unintentional as when Marisa had used it. "Shoot and I move! ...Wait, that's not right..."

"B-b-but you said I could stay h-here...!" Finally finding a way out from under the bedding, a vaguely familiar white haired girl popped her head out.

I blinked thrice in confusion as to who she might be, before a crazy thought found its way into my head. "...Wait, Usagi?"

Tilting her head to the side, the girl asked, "W-what...?"

"...Damn, you really are that rabbit youkai, aren't you...? Although, with your ears so much less floppy, and your butt far less fuzzy, I suppose you aren't that anymore, huh..." I wasn't sure what had happened, but whatever it was had no doubt happened. ...Or this was a very strange dream. Just to be sure, I gave myself a pinch. Yep! As I thought, this was too strange to be a dream.

Looking at me in confusion, the girl now just slightly smaller than myself began to feel atop her head, where a surprise awaited. "My ears are gone!" She felt about like wild until she felt her human-like ears on the side of her head. "Ehh? What's this?"

"Those are your ears now." I let out a sigh at her ignorance of what ears are, when they aren't those of a rabbit. Heck, how does one never learn what human ears are like? They're right freaking there! You should at least know about them from seeing other people with them!

Finally noticing the most important change, I made my way over to her. It can't be... Ice wings? She has the wings of a member of the court... I climbed on top of her, and began to examine them, pinning her to the bed in the process. Looks like she's a four-wing, too... Strange... She even has the inner glow that we have! "U-umm, w-what are you d- Ahh...!" As she asked her question, I began to feel her wing in detail, finding her reaction to be exactly what I would expect from a fae. She was squirming and letting out cute little gasps at the slightest touch of her wing. How sensitive can one fairy be...?

Putting that aside, and ignoring the fact that I just molested her, I stated, "Looks like I have a lot to teach you now, pupil... You're a fairy!"

Mystia let out a yawn, while still not recognizing her lack of a skirt. "Can I go now...?"

I looked over my shoulder, and gave her a nod. "Yeah, sorry about bugging you like that, Mysti..."

Lazily flapping her way to the door, the bird replied, " 'S okay..." She bumped into the wall beside the door, before righting herself and leaving.

Now alone with my apprentice of... whatever it was that I would be teaching her, I asked, "Any idea how this happened?" At the shake of the head from the still panting girl, I added, "This is stranger than that time I caught Yukari and Reimu wrestling..."

From outside, I heard Mystia let out a snort at the mention of the two that made up the boundary team doing such a thing.


Sunrise, Youkai Mountain, Aya's house, Aya's PoV:

"No... No... Not this either!" Outfit after outfit when flying over my shoulder, each stranger than the last. "Where the heck did all my clothes go?! These things all look like stuff I've seen Kourin wear... Or sell, in some cases..." While saying this I looked between a fundoshi and sarashi combo, a blue one-piece swimsuit, a maid outfit, and an outfit I had seen Sanae in before, back when first the mountain was taken over religiously. Holding up the swimsuit, I began to wonder what this was for, before my brain clicked in the worst of ways. "Could this be a sign? Are the gods challenging me on my tengu pride? ...If I wear these, will I be blessed with many readers?!"

In the distance, every last goddess on the mountain shouted some form of negative answer, which I chose not to hear. Holding up the maid outfit, I asked myself, "If I wear this, could it augment my elegance, and turn me into a dog?"

Holding up the swimsuit, I demanded, "And this! If I wear this will I go fast?! I think I've seen Nitori in this, so it has to be a technological marvel of some sort, right?!"

Donning what was obviously a flight suit designed for aerodynamics, I ran for the door. "I'll be able to end the long standing tie as the fastest like this! Heh, better go and try it out!"

And so I took flight in my swimsuit.


Late morning, Garden of the Sun, Yuuka's PoV:

Letting out a yawn from behind my hand, I began to rub the sleep from my eyes. Last night was far from restful; I know not why, but more and more issues have been coming up in my realm of late, to the point that I rarely get much rest when I sleep. Thankfully I rarely need to sleep, but still... At this rate, I'll need to sleep as much as a human!

As I made my way to the door of my room, I let the pink petals drop from my body, before red, black, and white replaced them, forming the attire I so love. First order of business is... Ahh, yes... "Time to give Wriggy a nice little wake-up call, and send her on her way~"

Making my way into the guest room, which was far easier on the eyes than the 'guest' room, I peeked inside. It put a smile on my face to see the bug peacefully dreaming about whatever she dreams about. Unbeknownst to me, she was actually dreaming about being used as a lap-pillow by me, while she watches me much like I currently am watching her. Of course, with my duty what it is, it would be a simple matter to look at her dreams, but seeing as the first and last time I tried that on her she was having a wet dream about me, I decided to be more respectful.

I would rather not have to see that again.

Listening to that little sadist in my head, I picked up the sleeping bug, and began to shake her like there was no tomorrow. However, that soon petered out when I heard a familiar beating of wings. Ohh? So she's back again, so soon? What a pleasing surprise, that is... Best lock up, and ambush her~

Outside, just as I had expected her to, Aya softly landed on my roof. "Ayaya... No scoops to be had! If anything's happening, I must have missed it, 'cause I've got nothing!" Letting out a sigh, she continued to think out loud to no-one in particular. "Maybe my last resort'll pay off, and I'll get a scoop offa old lady Yuuka..."

Ohh, if I were as sensitive about my age as Yukari is, I would spark that bird-brain for that comment. With all the windows but one secured, I listened for the click-clack of those strange geta of hers on the shingles of my roof. I doubt I'll ever understand the style of shoes that tengu wear...

While I was busy thinking about the bad taste of tengu, Aya had finished checking every window, and just about gotten to the point of giving up. "Ayaya... Just one window left, and I'll have nothing to put in the paper today..." Just as she reached for the window, I opened it up before pulling her inside with no effort on my part.

Grinning at the stunned tengu, I asked, "My, back for more already~? ...And you really should stop that habit of thinking aloud, you know... It just might get you killed one of these days..." At her panicked attempts to break free, I merely grinned wider. It wasn't long untill she relented to my iron grip on her wrist, and allowed me to sling her over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

Looking to the other shoulder of mine, I let out a shrill whistle, breaking Wriggle free from her lovely dreams. "Ehh...?" Looking about drowsily, Wriggle eventually noticed where she was. "Ohh, g'mornin', Yuuka..."

Grinning wider still, I replied, "My, how rude, Wriggy! That's master, to you~" As realization dawned on the bug, I began to speak over her rushed apologies, ignoring them in their entirety. "And not even saying you're sorry? My, it would seem someone needs to be punished!"

With a grin on my face, I made my way over to the basement door, and gently kicked it open. Making my way down the stairs, I eventually arived at the bottom step, and kicked the heavy-duty door open, making my way in. Giggling to myself, I began to think aloud. "Maybe a wooden horse ride will d- Ohh, that's even better! I know just what to do with you two..."

Placing Wriggy down on the ground, I began to strip Aya of that silly little thing. Where she even got it is beyond me. With the tengu bare of all clothing, I began to slip her into a strong yet soft youkai spider silk strait jacket. As I was about to bind her arms, I got a brilliant idea, and put Wriggy in a matching jacket, before fastening the sleaves to the opposite jacket, as if they were embracing each other. With that done, I took two ballgags and removed the strip of leather from one, and turned the other one into a two-sided ball gag. Securing their faces to each other as if they were kissing, I gave them a nice wide grin at their flushed cheeks and overall discomfort. With that done, I sat them upon the wooden horse, and secured their legs to the ground with shackles and weights, making the wooden horse work its magic, much to the further discomfort of my two guests.

My, how this shall be a fun day!