Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Some angst, some fluff. The usual.


Peggy was on a mission to get you new clothes. Your uniform wasn't worth laundering in her opinion, but the Supply Sargent wasn't agreeing with her. The only new uniform Scrooge would issue for you was that impractical white nurse's uniform, clunky heels, and a wool "cape-coat". He didn't seem to care that you were a frontline nurse and entitled to combat greens, this was the uniform he was issuing to you, so take it or leave it. And so Peggy begrudgingly grabbed the uniform from the supply Sargent and brought the rest of your clothes to be laundered.

When Peggy had returned, she'd promptly kicked Bucky out before handing you what she had found. The white nurse's uniform fitted you pretty well, and Peggy had even given you a pair of her stockings to wear. Which you were grateful for, since it help hide the small faded scars and bruises on your legs. She then helped you pin your hair out of your face, and put that god awful white cap on your head. Peggy had also brought some makeup, but she hadn't been sure what colour palette you preferred. Regardless you decided to pass on it, not because they were the wrong colours, because they weren't, but because you didn't want to have to ask Peggy to help you with it. And you didn't want her to look down on you because of it either. There were some things every women should know how to do, hair and makeup being one of them.

Sitting at the vanity, you looked at yourself in the mirror and couldn't believe it, you were barely recognizable. The boys were going to have a heart attack seeing you all cleaned up and in a skirt. But there was only one you really wanted to impress. Which almost made you swallow your ego and ask Peggy for help with the makeup. You decided to compromise, and went with simple mascara and lipstick, those were pretty basic and hard to mess up. You chose the least 'in your face' shade of red out of the few lipsticks she had brought. You'd never been a fan of the red that was all the rage these days, but you wanted to make a bit of a bang. When Peggy saw you were going to put makeup on after all she tried to offer you some eye shadow, foundation powder, and blush, but you just shook your head at them. Those you had no idea how to put on properly and not look like a cheap harlot in the process. Besides, your face was probably the only place on your body that wasn't littered in scars and bruises, so why hide it behind layers of powder? Now the scar on your neck on the other hand…

You were developing quite the love-hate relationship with it. On the one hand you wore it like a badge of honour, a symbol of the pain and suffering you had survived, of your resilience, of your courage, of your strength. Saying to the world: The monsters tried to kill me, break me, but I defeated them and I emerged victorious. But on the other hand, it wasn't the prettiest thing to look at. This long, jagged, raised bit of dark pink flesh was hard to miss, and made you feel self-conscious, ugly, unclean. It made you feel shame, for what had happened to you, for being violated, for not being able to stop it. It made you feel undesirable and unlovable. It telegraphed to the world that you were tainted, damaged goods. Who could want such a broken thing?

Peggy had noticed how your gaze had gone from the foundation powder to your scar and the look of consideration on your face. So she took the powder and placed the lid back onto it.

"You don't need that". She said, twisting the lid shut. "Barnes is going to have a heart attack when he sees you." She added smirking and raising her eyebrows playfully.

You smiled and blushed a little at that as you got up from the vanity and picked up your boots. Sitting down on the side of the bed to put them on and began lacing them up. Turns out Sgt Scrooge didn't have those awful heels in anything near your size, so combat boots it was. Not that you were too upset over it, you'd been wearing combat boots for the last few years, and you weren't sure you even remembered how to walk in heels.

Peggy looked at your cleaned up combat boots and once again apologised for not being able to find you proper shoes. Her apology was lost in your frustration with your boots, as you unlaced one and tried again. Why was it you always ended up with one boot too tight? This shouldn't be rocket science for crying out loud!

As you finally finished lacing up your boots, you looked at them again. It was amazing what a few layers of polish could do, could hide. If you didn't look too closely, you'd almost believe they were new. Part of you thought the boots tied the whole outfit together rather well actually. The other part, a smaller part of you, the "1940s womanly standards and expectations" part was mortified that your outfit was mismatched. And you briefly wondered if Bucky would care, if he would be disappointed.

Peggy noticed your introspection, and recognise the doubt that was trying to creep up.

"Barnes is not going to notice your feet. Trust me." She said, putting a hand on your shoulder and squeezing gently. Effectively stopping your doubts in their tracks.

You looked up at her with a grateful smile and a head nod. She was right. And even if he did, he wouldn't care. You knew that, deep in your bones, you knew that. You'd worn deadmen's clothes, been covered in blood and grimme, he'd seen many of your scars, and he still thought you were the most beautiful woman in the world. But those damn insecurities could be stubborn bastards and hard to shake sometimes.

Out of the corner of your eye you saw Peggy pull something out of her pocket and hand it to you. You recognised what it was immediately and scoffed.

"One more thing." She said as she handed you a new shiny silver 1st Lt bar and gold caduceus medical pin.

"Can't get me a new uniform, but these you have?" You shook your head, as you took the bar and pin.

"Yes well, you know the military. God forbid you don't know who to salute."

You started laughing as you looked at the silver bar and gold medical pin in your hand. God forbid indeed.


You shivered as the cold November air nipped at your legs as you stepped outside heading towrds the mess hall. In reality it wasn't really that cold, it's just you were used to wearing pants and not a skirt and nylons. You were grateful for the wool cape though, the white nurse's uniform was rather thin fabric.

You were also grateful to be walking with Peggy. She had a way of parting the Red Sea so to speak. Soldiers got out of the way when she approached, and then kept their distances. Which meant you didn't have to worry about cat-calls or fending off the yahoos that would try to pick you up for a night of "fun", since you were obviously the new meat in town. The looks of interest that were sent your way, on the other hand, were hard to ignore. Guess the word that you were taken hadn't spread as quickly as you'd hoped, or they just didn't care.

You were glad once you entered the mess hall. One: because it was warm and smelled of real food, you couldn't even remember the last time you'd had a real meal. And two: because you immediately spotted Bucky, and when you saw his ocean blue eyes meet yours you lit up with a smile. It occurred to you it should have been the other way around, until your stomach growled. Sorry sweetheart, but food wins this round.

When Joe Toye let out a whistle, Bucky's attention had moved from the conversation he'd been having with Bull to the entrance. To say he was stunned when he saw you was the understatement of the century. Every thought left his mind with his breath when he saw you. You were a vision, an angel. His angel. And so he just sat there looking at you with a goofy grin on his face as you walked towards him.

Everyone's attention was now turned towards you as you made your way to Bucky's table. A few more of the boys let out whistles of their own, others throwing comments of disbelief at your appearance. Who knew there was a beautiful woman underneath that shapeless green uniform? And why had you been holding out on them? It all made you blush and shake your head as you smiled bashfully. You knew their comments came from a place of respect and friendship, from a safe place, and not barely concealed sexual desire. Easy was very much like the older brother who sees his younger sister in her prom dress all dolled up. Proud of the beautiful woman she is, but protective of her as well.

When you finally reached Bucky's table, you stood there blushing and embarrassed from the attention you were getting from your boys and found your feet very interesting. And in there lied the contradiction. You had wanted to make a bang, make an impression. But now that you had, you didn't know how to react to it.

"Damn girl, you clean up good!" Joe said. "And the boots! Love it! Really ties the outfit together."

Thank god for Joe, you thought, he always knew how to cut through your embarrassment and shift your focus.

"Thanks Joe, I think so too." You replied showing off your boots. "Although I don't think Col Phillips agrees. Passed him on the way here, he didn't seem too impressed."

The little exchange seemed to kick Bucky out of his stupor, and he stood up and helped you with your coat.

"You look amazing doll." He whispered in your ear, inhaling your scent, before pulling a chair out for you.

You sat down, smiling like a school girl. Your face having heated up after feeling Bucky's breath on your neck, the heat of his body so close to yours, with his scent enveloping you. The boys were nice enough not to tease you about it, they were just so happy to see you so happy.

After asking you what you'd like to eat, Bucky left the table to go get your food.

The boys at the table, a mix of Easy men and Howling Commandos all complimented you on your appearance. A few even making fun of the stupid little hat. You'd never felt prettier in your life. Sheltered in the bubble created by your friends, you missed the change in the air that had happened when Bucky had whispered in your ear. Broadcasting to the whole camp that you were his, or he was yours, depending on who's point of view you looked at.

The other nurses and women in the mess hall were hiding their jealousy poorly. You were pretty, sure, in a girl next door kinda way, despite your scar. So what did you have that the other girls here didn't? How did you manage to catch Bucky?

Every single, and even some married, female members of the base had flirted with Bucky and had been very obvious about what they wanted. Sometimes he'd flirted back, had taken a few of them dancing even, the ones that seemed to want more from him than just a night of passion. But at the end of the night he had always left them at their doorstep wanting, and bided them a goodnight.

To be honest, Bucky was confused as to why the dames still kept coming back for more, he was sure by now the word would have spread that he never took a girl to bed at the end of the night and they would've stopped trying by now, knowing they wouldn't get anywhere. Women did talk to each other after all.

However that didn't seem to stop the women from trying to get into Bucky's bed. To try and be the one to finally get Bucky Barnes, Cpt America's handsome best friend.

Bucky kept up the charade only to keep Steve from asking him what was wrong, and having to rehash Austria with him. He didn't want to have to tell Steve that ever since Austria, it's not that he didn't want to, it's just he couldn't, it didn't feel right, he didn't feel right. He didn't feel clean, he didn't feel worthy of that kind of affection.

But now, with you…..you made him feel clean and worthy of being loved. You brought life and light back into his dark and weary soul, lead him away from the edge of the abyss that threatened to swallow him. And he wanted to be with you in every sense that mattered.

Bucky hadn't missed the glaring looks that the women were giving you since you'd sat down. Thankfully you didn't seem to notice. He also didn't miss the "nice catch" smirks and the jealous glares of the men directed at him either. That's right folks, she's my angel so back off!

"Leave it to you Barnes to break the hearts of an entire room". Peggy said in ways of greeting as he met up with her and Steve at the kitchen counter.

Steve smirked, 'just like the good old days' he thought. To be honest, he had started to get concerned about Bucky when he started not taking out girls dancing as often as he had back in Brooklyn. Granted they were in the middle of a war and being run ragged trying to stop HYDRA. But still, it was dancing, and there were few things Bucky loved more than dancing. And the dames were literally throwing themselves at him, and Bucky was just politely shrugging them off. So yes, Steve was starting not to buy the 'I'm too tired' excuse Bucky would usually feed him when Steve would look at him questioningly after he'd turned down yet another dame.

Steve wasn't an idiot, he knew the stuff Bucky had gone through since getting to Europe was going to change him somewhat, and that's not even counting the whole HYDRA thing. But it felt like Bucky was slowly being dragged into a dark abyss. And Steve was desperately trying to hold onto his friend, but was slowly loosing his grip. This war needed to end before it cost both their souls.

Bucky just shrugged, he couldn't care less what the men and women of the base thought. He was the luckiest man in the world as far as he was concerned. And those who's opinion mattered to him would be happy for him. You were his and he was yours and that's all that mattered. He looked back at you, smiling as he watched you talking. As if you knew he was looking at you, you turned his way and smiled back. Yes, he was the luckiest man in the world.

Bucky came back to the table with your tray of food, and sat down beside you smiling. And in a move that Steve was sure was to both make it clear and stir things up, Bucky leaned in and quickly kissed the side of your head, before scooting even closer to you without actually openly putting his arm around you. You just looked at him and smiled happily, before one of the boys made a gagging sound and you threw a piece of bread at him for breaking your moment. Making the whole table erupt into laughter.

Yes Bucky was the luckiest man in the world.


The Howling Commandos had told the men of Easy about this pub that was in town, and had told them to meet them there later on tonight for drinks and merriment. This pub was one of the few still intact buildings in the town, and therefore tended to be a rendezvous point for both base personnel and the town's people. It offered good food, good drink, and a decently sized dance floor.

Bucky had asked you out on a date tonight to said pub. You'd been smiling, excited, as he had asked you, but your smile faltered when he mentioned dancing. Something that didn't go unnoticed by Bucky.

"If you'd rather do something else…"

"No, no. I want to go on this date with you, it's just… I'm not a very good dancer, like at all, so as long as you don't mind getting your toes stepped on all night…" You tired to explain.

"Don't worry doll, I'll teach you." Bucky said, thinking this was an easy fix.

But rather than make you feel better, your face fell even more when he said that.

"What is it?" He asked concerned. Was there something else? Did he miss something?

You didn't answer, and you avoided looking at him, finding your hands very interesting as you picked at a small scratch. How were you going to explain this?

"Hey, look at me." He said as he gently put a finger under your chin making you look up at him. "Talk to me."

Bucky could feel the building anxiety rolling off of you.

When you finally looked up at him, his stormy blue eyes were filled with nothing but love, letting you know this was a safe place, that you were safe with him, that he had you. And you relaxed somewhat.

"It's just… people… guys… have tried to teach me before, they all just get frustrated and give up, and I end up ruining the night. And I don't want to ruin our night."

So that's what it was? You were afraid your poor dancing skills would turn him off? Would make him want you less? That was ridiculous, Bucky thought, you could never.

"You're not going to ruin the night doll. I'm not going to get frustrated with you, and I will never give up on you, I promise you." Bucky said, as he held your hands, stopping you from picking at the scratch.

"You say that now, but I'm really, really bad…" You tried again.

"So?" He said cutting you off.

Bucky really wasn't seeing how this was still an issue. He didn't care if he spent all night showing you, and you ended up still stepping on his toes by the end of the night. He just wanted to be with you. Couldn't you see that?

You sighed. Why wasn't he getting it? You would just end up ruining the night because you were two left feet. And you didn't want to be the reason that he stopped dancing, something he loved to do.

"I'm not going to get it in one night, not even a little, that's how much I suck at dancing." You tried explaining again.

"And?"

"It could take forever. Are you honestly willing to spend forever with me stepping on your toes?"

"Yes. And you say that like it's a bad thing when it's not."

"Isn't it though? Steve says you love to dance, and I can't be the dance partner you deserve. I don't want you to feel like you can't because I can't. I don't want you to stop doing something you love, because I can't follow."

Bucky just smiled at you lovingly. God you were so adorable sometimes.

"Doll, as long as I get to have you in my arms that's all I care about. We'll make our own dance moves. And if you really want to learn, I'll spend forever showing you how, even if you never get it. And I promise you I'll love every second of it because I'll be with you."

That was the most beautiful thing anyone had ever said to you, and you now had tears in your eyes. How had you gotten so lucky?

"I like the sound of that." You answered, letting a tear roll down your cheek as you smiled brightly at Bucky, as he wiped it away with his thumb smiling back at you.


TBC in Ch.7