A.N

I want to thank to all of the young G's out there who supported me and read my shit!

OVER 2.000 VIEWS BABY HAHAHAHAHAHAHASJHFKSJH

Snopp Dogg:Smoke weed everyday!

Vaas:Hi hermanos!

Joker:Evening...Readers...

Syndra:GET ME OUT OF HERE!

Now, let the games begin!


Ah, the beach dedicated to only champions.

A beautiful tropical paradise, golden sands, palm trees swinging slowly in the wind, clear sky, crystal clear water, champions sitting on the beach, champion couples cuddling and kissing, Renekton in his Pool Party Skin...

Everything was so peaceful in this fine morning on the beach, oh yea, everything was peaceful..

"Dude what the fuck are we doing on the beach?"Thresh asked as he tossed his joint away. Karthus took another smoke from the 24th joint today and said:

"You, me and Hecarim, are going to go on a quest."

"What kinda quest?"

"We are going to find a mermaid, then, we are going to drug her like there is no tomorrow to find out the exact quantity needed for killing a mermaid with weed!"Karthus said making dramatic movements with his hands and finishing with a dramatic pose.

"Okay, seems legit now are we going to fuck her first?"Thresh asked scratching his skull.

"Maybe...Oh, speaking of fucking, have you called Vaas?"

"Yea, he said that he will make it here in about 30 minutes, but why do we call Vaas here?"

"Man, we are going to kidnap a mermaid, fuck her then drug her like there is no tomorrow and you are asking me about that?"

"Right..Hey, where's Twitch?"

"He is in a coma, I hope now, let's continue!"

With that said, Karthus and Thresh jumped on poor's Hecarim's back and the trio charged into the sea to find the lucky mermaid.


Meanwhile...

After the gun fight at the bar, after Kassadin and Shaco somehow related Syndra to 9/11, after Slim Shady cock blocked and almost raped Syndra, she and Vladimir needed some time together, alone, away from the champions on the main beach.

They were on an isolated part of the beach, sitting on the sand with Syndra resting her head on Vladimir's chest while he threw from time to time a look at her curves made even more visible by her black bikini. Oh yes, silence, peace, the sound of waves, the sound of leaves moving when the wind blew, oh, silence...

"We mash up the place turn up the bass and make them all have fun

And we ablaze the fire make it burn them

We mash up the place turn up the bass and make some sound boy run

And we will end your week just like a Sunday!"

Skrillex blasted from the speakers of the combat boat which ran through the water making a huge amount of noise which mixed with the loud music making Syndra and Vladi snapping their heads in the direction of the awful noise.

Vladimir placed his hands on his ears while Syndra's eyes twitched as she got up and walked to the water. She looked at the boat which slowed down and looked like it was going to remain there and with a flick of her wrist the boat was sent flying into the air before landing into the water.

Pleased with herself she returned to her lover but she stopped when she heard someone behind her:

"I'm sorry do you heave any fucking idea, how rude that was?"Vaas said as he gestured towards his pirates which were now swimming to shore.

She slowly turned to face the man and there she found Vaas, soaking wet, his Mohawk somehow still in place. She had no idea who this man was, or why he was still alive or why is hair was still in place after she flipped his boat but there was one thing assured.

He pissed off Syndra and no, you ain't pissing off Syndra, you just don't do it, it's safer to tell me about France or poke a lion with a stick in his own cage.

"Hey big tits, I am talking to you!"Vaas said to regain her attention. Syndra looked at him with a bored expression before she sent him flying into the other part of the beach.


ON THE OTHER PART OF THE BEACH!

Ezreal was in a make out session with LUX not TARIC and he finally managed to slowly untie her swimming suit without she noticing. This was perfect, this was wonderful and what appeared to be a flying Vaas coming towards hi-

Vaas crashed into the two launching Ezreal head first into a sand castle while Vaas fell over Lux. He got up dusting his red T-Shirt, looked at the part of the beach where Syndra was and shouted:

"NOBODY FUCKS WITH VAAS MONTENEGRO!NO ONE!"

Suddenly a huge crowd of fan girls appeared from nowhere, all of them saying stuff like this:

"OMFG VAAS PLS MARRY ME!11111!1!1!11!"

"VAAS SO KAWAII!"

"SUPER MEGA ULTRA BEGA TRIPLA FUCKA SHITTY MEGA NOSE BLEED!"

"VAAS PLS TAKE MY VIRGINITY!"

In the next second Vaas started a marathon for his life on the beach while shouting:

"STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SKIRT WEARING MONSTERS!"


Meanwhile...

Guess what?

Hecarim, Karthus and Thresh did actually FOUND a mermaid, which was Nami of course but they didn't gave a fuck, as long as she was as big as a human and had a fish tale, she was good.

They tied her to Hecarim and they were heading for the shore, when the disaster strike...

Thresh was struggling for 30 good minutes to light a joint underwater and he started to lose his patience and what you do when you lose patience, you have something which pisses you off and you are an undead?

You ask Karthus of course!

"Man this fucking joint won't light whatever the fuck I do to it!"Thresh shouted as he tried to light it with all his might.

Karthus sighed and Hecarim said:

"He is not really trying to use a lighter underwater, right?"

"I'm afraid he is my half horse comrade."Karthus said as he slapped his face. "Thresh, there is no possible way you are going to use fire underwater!"Karthus continued as he took the lighter from Thresh.

"But why?"

"Because you just can't!"

"And why the fuck I can't use fire underwater, what kinda shitty logic is that!"

The trio continued to move underwater, admiring the sea life or in Thresh's case, fighting an octopus and a shark while small crabs were pick pocketing him but the walk underwater was pretty nice, they needed some time to relax after the shit that happened this week.

Suddenly an idea crossed Thresh's mind. He got a very special mix from Ziggs which is highly flammable, it was like gas, but 100 times worse. He only got a small gallon but Ziggs told him that this quantity was enough to burn the entire Institute down.

But wait, if he used this here there is no telling what could happen or what damage coudl've done to the happy sea life which was thriving in here, all those beautiful fishes and small creatures, the corals...

"Fuck that, weed is weed!"

I could explain what happened next so that you might understand just how such thing was even possible but instead, I will make a time skip!


10 minutes later.

Karthus, Thresh, Hecarim and Nami were on the beach. Thresh was in flames but it didn't bothered him because he managed to light his joint and the portion of the sea extending before them was son fire.

Yup, Thresh just set a portion of the crystal clear sea on fire. How?Well it was hard to say just how the hell he managed to achieve this but hey, he light his joint so it was worth!

"Thresh, do you realize that even the underwater is on fire..HOW CAN THE UNDERWATER BURN IF IT IS MADE OUT OF WATER?!"Karthus shouted as he flamed his arms wildly.

"Meh, I think it's a paradox thingy."Thresh said.

"Wait...paradox?Where there is a paradox it's a black hole too!"

Suddenly a small black hole appeared behind them, out of it coming out a Japanese chef shouting:

"HIROSHIMA! NAGASAKI! SUSHI! BANZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAI!"

He grabbed Nami and pulled her into the black hole letting an awkward silence behind.

"Screw you guys, I'm going to watch MLP."Hecarim said as he headed for his room. Karthus sighed and rubbed his face as Thresh stared blankly at the flaming sea before them. Luckily the champions were on the other side of the beach so they didn't noticed the flaming area.

"So what we do now?"Thresh asked. Karthus thought for a while scratching his chin before he responded:

"We called Vaas so why not go roll a blunt with him?"

"Man, that bald eagle scares the shit outta me."


Meanwhile...

"Isn't it lovely, just you and me, alone."Vladimir said as he held Syndra close while staring at the blue sea. She closed her eyes, resting her head on his shoulder as she said:

"I love you Vladi..."

"I love you too.."

Aww...what a nice little moment I managed to do here, give me credit for it I mean they really deserve a break from all the retarded things they've been through plus the are so cute together.

Would you know that I am writing this happy little moment while listening to Jeff The Killer's piano theme which is one of the saddest and creepiest things I ever heard in my life?

Anyway, cuddling brake over, time for me to be an asshole!

The two leaned in for a kiss when suddenly bullets started flying around them as Vaas's voice shouted:

"IMPERIALISTS, COLONIALISTS, FUCKS!"

5 minutes later...

Syndra was floating above the ground, dark spheres at the ready, Vladimir had his weird ball of blood in his hands, Vaas was standing in front of them, pistol at the ready and and standing behind him was a pretty decent sized group of pirates pointing their weapons at Syndra and Vladimir.

"Put your balls down!"Vaas said.

"No you put your guns down!"Syndra spat back at him her voice regaining her usual echo.

"You first!"

"You!"

"Are we really going there?"Vladimir asked as he pinched the bridge of his nose while Syndra and Vaas kept on arguing.

"Put your dark balls down now!"

"Your guns first!"

"You first!"

"You!"

"You!"

"You!"

"Argh!Goddammit you!"

"I said it first amigo!Hermana put your fucking balls down!"

"I am not your FUCKING hermana!"

"That's a subjective, philosophical, point of fucking view!Put the balls down, let's go!"Vaas said as he took a step forward.

"Hey!You take on more step and I will kill all of you!"Syndra hissed at him.

"Oh yea?If I take one more step you kill me?"Vaas asked and Syndra nodded.

"Like this?"Vaas said as he took a step forward. In a split second all the dark spheres around Syndra were sent towards Vaas and his small army, managing only to destroy a palm tree. The pirates looked at their bodies making sure that everything was in place while Vaas looked at the dead tree and then back at Syndra.

"Okay this is fucking rude, do you have any fucking idea about the number of tiny things living that were living in that tree?"Vaas said giving Syndra enough time to toss him into his own men.

"Okay, THIS BITCH IS GOING DOWN!"Vaas shouted. Suddenly from the bushes appeared the horde of fan girls.

"THERE HE IS!"

"MARRY ME VAAS!11111!11111111111!"

"VAAS LET ME SUCK YOUR DICK!"

"VAAS TOY WITH MY BOOBS!"

"VAAS PLS RAPE ME PLS PLSPLSP LSPL SPLS PLSAPSD LAP P[LSDP[;OGJSLADIJTWEL;'JTGLKRWHT1"

Then the pirate group and fan girls horde clashed, Vaas fighting the horrible creatures with his machete. Syndra tilted her head slightly and Vladimir took her hand and said:

"Shall we go and eat something?"

"My pleasure."

The two lover birds started to back away from the scene as Vaas, covered in blood in organs, shouted behind them:

"HEY!WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING?!THIS A PERFECTLY GOOD MOMENT TO THROW YOUR LIFE AWAY!"

Soon Karthus and Thresh reached the small battlefield.

Blood everywhere, dead bodies of girls and pirates littered the sands, Vaas was breathing heavily while staring at his blood soaked machete as his pirates trembled. They didn't expect them to be so vicious and so numerous. They got lucky when one of them managed to rip Vaas's red T-shirt off, that was when they literally started to eat each other for it.

"Duuuuuuuuuuuude, what the fuck have you done?"Thresh asked as he kicked away a dead body. Vaas snapped his head towards them and said:

"You two motherfuckers!Do you have any idea just how bad Hoyt whooped my ass because of you two and your fucking drug money?!WHERE ARE THEY?!"

"Umm...Mister Montenegro..you see we were...ummm...THRESH RUN!"Karthus shouted then he and Thresh ran into the jungle followed by Vaas and his pirates.


A.N

ry for the late update but...buuuut..bu-T

THE FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL IS STARTING!

Vaas: Hermano I didin't went to school and look at me!

Joker: I blew up one yesterday!

Syndra: Oh finally, you will be far away most of the days!

Me: Oh don't be so glad Synny, I have friends to take care of you?

Syndra: Yea?Such ass?

Jeff the Killer: GO TO SLEEP!

Ticci Toby: H-tsk-H-tsk-Hi t-there *head and eye twitch*

Laughing Jack: Candy?

Smile Dog: You are such hideous creatures...

Syndra: GET ME OUTTA HERE YOU!

Me: *finishes Sprite bottle* Nah, they like it too much the way u suffer, UNTIL NEXT TIME I WAS THE ROMANIAN BOSNIAN WIZARD AND YOU ARE READING WEED ADVENTURES!