A/N: Holy bejeesus, sorry for the late post everybody! I just had a super bad cold + case of writer's block + writing cullen/solas was super hard. Plus I figured writing a quality chapter was better than just updating with a shit one. I hope I did an okay job. thanks for keeping up with my story! I hope you guys like it!


Solas and Cullen scouted the forest in silence. The air was fraught with tension, but neither could be moved to address it. Together they had already collected two bundles of crystal grace, the quiet urgency growing as they searched for more.

"There!" Solas murmured, moving forward into a thicket towards the crystal grace. He knelt down to collect it.

Cullen watched him, his movements graceful and controlled. Although Cullen had grown to begrudgingly respect the apostate elf during the Inquisition, the two were never more than friendly acquaintances. He could never break his initial impression that Solas was hiding something. Even till the end, Cullen wondered about the secrets that Solas held beneath his unreadable expression.

When the news hit- that Solas had disappeared after Corypheus' defeat, that he left without a trace, Cullen was not as surprised as the others. In fact, he felt almost satisfied, knowing his suspicions were correct: there was more to Solas than met the eye. But this satisfaction was overshadowed quickly by Alina's suffering, something that ignited a mixture of feelings within Cullen.

Though the elf was back, Cullen still had no answers. The fact that Solas could move so silently, so easily, among the company of the Inquisition, leave without warning, and come back, said much about his nature. A wolf in sheep's clothing.

Cullen could not fathom how Solas could return without answering any questions, how he could move, guiltless, back into his place at their sides. Cullen felt the other night's anger grow within him, though he fought to control it.

Solas spoke as he continued to cut the crystal grace. His voice was light and unassuming, but his words carried a heavy weight.

"She already knows we cannot be."

Cullen was taken aback, his eyes narrowing, though he let no audible cue that he was surprised. The forest seemed to close in around him as he took a step closer to Solas, trying to read his mood. When Solas cast an unreadable expression over his shoulder, Cullen felt his emotion began to seep through. He could not help himself.

"Then why did you come back? Did you come to see the heartbreak you've caused?" Cullen gritted his teeth.

"On the contrary, Commander," Solas responded, his voice sharpening ever so slightly, "I did not intend to ever come back, regardless of the blush that haunts her cheeks, the pain so easily read upon her face." Solas looked away. "But circumstance changes everything."

"She… We are not pawns in your game, Solas!" Cullen's voice rose. "We are not slaves to circumstance."

Solas snapped, standing up, his eyes boring deep into Cullen's, "You know nothing of which you speak! Commander though you may be, you are blind to the events unfolding before you." Solas walked up to Cullen, his stare unwavering.

"I may have been blinded before, by my own naivety, but no longer. I will protect the Inquisition," Cullen said, matching Solas' gaze, "I will protect Alina from anything. Even from you."

Solas considered the man before him. He had seen the story before- a man haunted by his past, desperate and wanting to make things right. Often, he had seen it go awry, men and elves living in fear instead of in spite of it. But before him he saw an unwavering resolve, a confidence that was not bold or brash, but one born of true perseverance.

Swallowing his pride, Solas reclaimed his cool demeanor. "You are right. You are not pawns in a game," he moved away from Cullen, facing the direction of the Lavellan camp, "You are free to move, to shape the world as you wish. I am merely here to guide you, if I can."

"And once we are done here? Will you again take your leave of us?"

"Yes. There are many things I must attend to before my journey is over." Solas clutched the crystal grace. His ears twitched, knowing what question would come next.

"And what of you and Alina?"

"I do not want to bring any more hurt to such a wondrous being. My feelings are irrelevant now… Merely a distraction from my true intent." Solas felt a sting as he said the words aloud, his heart beating fast as he murmured what he only knew could be lies. He looked over his shoulder at Cullen, his voice soft, "Can you take that pain away?"

Cullen felt the question ache in his bones. The forest was unusually silent, and he could only hear his heart beating in his ears. He looked into the elf's eyes. Cullen was surprised at the earnestness of the words that then came out of his own mouth, his vulnerability in their loneliness the last thing he ever expected.

"I want to try."


"We've brought back the crystal grace." Cullen unloaded the plant matter into the hands of Zaos, who worked deftly to create the antidote to the poison wracking Alina's body.

"Your timing is good, much longer and she would have been done for." Zaos mumbled. He held a glass vial up to the sun, flicking its side. "Looks good."

Cassandra and Varric kept close watch on Alina, trying to pass the time by telling each other stories and arguing halfheartedly. Rychell stayed close to Alina's side, holding the hand of his older sister.

"They've returned, lethallin, you will be okay," He whispered into her ear.

Lian watched from the outskirts of the encampment as Zaos administered the potion to Alina, a combination of relief and resentment growing within him.

The Alina he had come to know and love growing up in the wild forests of Thedas had changed incredibly, this much he was sure of. He remembered her innocence, her laughter, things that seemed long gone. Together they were curious about the outside world, wondering and fantasizing about what it would be like to go to a human city. They would play games in the trees, pretending to be kings and warriors.

As they had reached their teenage years, he found himself growing an even deeper love for her. He felt enamored, the presence of her churning a hot and insistent feeling within. He began to look at her in ways he had never noticed before. Together they explored what it meant to grow up, to be an adult, and Lian remembered feeling the happiest he had ever been.

The day came when she was sent to the conclave, and he thought nothing of it, knowing her return would come soon enough. He sent her off with a kiss on her vallaslin-covered face.

When word had reached the Lavellan clan about the explosion, Lian was torn apart, his whole world turned upside down. Sure she had perished, he mourned for days, spiraling deeper into depression. But this period did not last, for again word came that she was safe. Not just safe, he had learned, but that she was being called the Herald of Andraste, the Inquisitor.

His relief turned to sadness when he received no word from her. Bitter in his longing, he wondered if she had so easily forgotten about him. In darkness this bitterness grew, though he tried to cast it aside. He immersed himself in the hunt, finding comfort in the perfection of his skills and in the friendship of Mahanon, her brother.

He could not stop her return from awakening old feelings, but he knew that her heart was no longer with him. She was so different, he realized, it was as if she had really died at the conclave, and was born anew, her past forgotten as she molded herself into the Inquisitor, the people's hero.

But is that really what you wanted to be?

Lian slipped off into the forest.


"Inquisitor," Cassandra began, kneeling beside Alina, who was now sitting upright.

Alina had been awake for a few minutes, coughing and sputtering at the unfortunate taste of the antidote. She chastised Zaos for not adding a hint of embrium to aid the taste, at which he merely smiled.

"Yes, Cassandra?"

"I am sorry to do this so soon, but it seems as if I must take my leave of you."

"Now? I thought you could stay for at least a few more weeks?"

"Letters have come requesting my presence. It is unfortunate, but I must go immediately. I just wanted to wait, to make sure you were going to be alright."

Varric ushered away the rest of the party, realizing Cassandra wanted to say good-bye to Alina in private.

"That was very thoughtful of you, Cassandra, but I don't want to be in trouble for keeping the new Divine away from her duties." Alina smiled.

"They can deal with it," Cassandra replied, smiling back, "You are much more important, anyhow."

A quiet silence settled between them. Cassandra reached out and put her hand on Alina's shoulder. Alina would miss the gesture.

"Alina. It has been an honor to fight beside you, from the very beginning. I will not forget this journey nor the bonds we have shared."

"We sure have come far since the time you wanted to chop my head off, haven't we?"

"Yes," Cassandra laughed, "I am afraid I can be brash sometimes. But I'm sure I will learn many things when I become the Divine."

"You will change many things too, Cassandra."

"That is my intention. I will always be available if you need to talk, or if you need a good sword to fight beside you. I do not know if I can trust anyone else to be your shield."

"You have done so much for the world already, Cassandra. You have done so much for me. I would be doing you a disservice if I were to up and die the minute you left." Alina reassuringly replied, knowing the worry in Cassandra's mind. "Don't worry, I'll keep teasing Varric when you're gone."

"Good." Cassandra stood up. "We will see each other again, Inquisitor."

"We will. I promise." Alina struggled to stand to her feet, smiling as Cassandra quickly helped her. She embraced her friend, laughing at Cassandra's confusion. "Don't go destroying the world now, alright? We've worked so hard to save it already."

"Only because you asked me to."

Cassandra began to walk away, the inevitability of her future hitting her hard. But the world would keep on turning, and she knew that she had the power to make things right.


"The Arbor Wilds?" Alina asked, bewildered. "Why do we need to go there?"

"Alina…" Keeper Deshanna sat beside Alina, gazing into the fire in the middle of camp. The sun had already gone down, the stars shining above them. "While you were gone, and unconscious, I have been doing some research of my own about your brother's murder."

"What have you found?" Alina asked urgently.

"I believe there are elves plotting in the Arbor Wilds. What they really intend to do is unclear, but I think they have been targeting you, and us, for some time. Perhaps an act of vengeance, a bid for power, I do not know. But I do know you, da'len, and I know you would like to find out the truth for yourself."

"Elves?" Alina remembered Abelas and the Temple of Mythal. "The Arbor Wilds holds many mysteries, Keeper. Where will we find them?"

"This is true, child. There are many old temples from ancient elvhen times, strewn about the chaos that is the forest there. Cullen told me you have already solved the puzzle of Mythal's Temple. There are two more of interest that you ought to seek out: the Temple of Andruil…. and the Sanctuary of Fen'Harel."

"Fen'Harel?!" Alina asked, fear growing in her voice, "The Dread Wolf had a temple?"

"Yes, you may find answers you are searching for there. Be not hesitate, for the curse of the Dread Wolf should not be feared by you."

"Keeper?"

"When you are well, you should head to the Arbor Wilds. I know that we both want to let Mahanon rest. Do not be scared, sweet child, you will soon find all the answers you seek."

"Yes, hahren." Alina responded. "Thank you."

"Thanks are not needed. You have done well thus far, Alina. You will do well now, too."

The Keeper gave Alina a reassuring smile before retiring to her caravan. Alina resumed staring at the fire, watching the flames dance, lost in thought. A slight shuffle caught her attention, and she turned her head to see Solas emerging from his tent.

"Alina. May I?" Solas gestured.

"Of course." He sat down beside her.

"We are to go to the Arbor Wilds," Alina said, "We are to seek out the temples of Andruil and Fen'Harel."

A moment of silence passed.

"So the Keeper has told me," Solas replied slowly.

"Solas…" Alina sighed, "I am glad you are here."

He turned his head to study the elf beside him. "I am glad it seems you have changed your opinion."

"I feel safer going to the Arbor Wilds with your knowledge, though," Alina started, before lowering her voice to a whisper. She admitted the fear within her, "I… I am scared to go to the Sanctuary of Fen'Harel."

Solas smiled inwardly, the fear in Alina's voice betraying her ever-present innocence. He was reminded momentarily of their time in the Inquisition, when the folds of their relationship allowed her to reveal her passions, her fears, her vulnerabilities in the safety of his arms without fear of repercussion. In those days he offered her comfort and protection.

Solas gently placed a hand on her cheek, bringing her eyes to his. He chose his words carefully.

"You need not be afraid, da'len. The Dread Wolf will not take you when you are with me. I will not let him find you."

"Okay."

The flames gave her cheek a warm glow. Alina's eyes ablaze with their own determination, the trace of her brow still betrayed her concerns. Solas soaked in the contours of her cheeks, the sprinkle of light freckles over the bridge of her nose. He gazed where the vallaslin used to be.

Alina watched Solas watching her, noticing his gaze as they trailed over her bare face. Before she might have blushed, embarrassed to be looked at so blatantly. Solas used to make her feel embarrassed, small, and forever young in the presence of his wisdom. But things were different now, and she no longer felt his power so strongly over her. True, there were parts of her heart that begged for his touch. But his return changed the song that danced between them- he had come back for her. No matter what pretense he chose to show or hide, she knew that he returned for her, and for no other.

Alina wanted to let go. She wanted to remember what it felt like- the purity of their relationship, the unbound passion. She brought her face closer to his, and she could feel his breath on hers. His expression was unreadable, constrained, and before this would make her annoyed. Tonight she cherished it, knowing the battle raging within him.

"Good night." Alina whispered. She stood up and began to walk to her tent.

"Good night, Alina." Solas responded.

Perhaps she was being petty, but she justified it in her mind, telling herself that with all of the horrible things happening lately, the least she deserved was a little bit of fun at the expense of the elf who broke her heart.


A/N: weew. so there it was. i'm actually pretty alright with how it turned out... What do you guys think? Leave me reviews :D they make me the happiest person in the universe (and inspire me to keep writing :D)