A/N: I think I officially lost my way with this. So im open for any suggestions you guys give me. Forgive me if it doesn't make a lick of sense.
You could hear the screams from the people of Camelot miles away. Morgana and Gwen stormed the castle; their army killed everyone in sight. Arthur and the knights of Camelot fought off as many as they could before merlin pleaded for him to retreat. Arthur went reluctantly, but not before he saw Gwen. He looked her straight in the eye while merlin was hauling him to safety... His eyes searched for the coldness he saw when she first came back after he had banished her. He should've known then that she wasn't who she said she was. She was evil, just like morgana now. But instead he saw regret and anger. One of his best qualities in Arthur's mind was his ability to see right through her. And it did help that Gwen always wore her emotions on her sleeves. Arthur could faintly see that she was doing this unwillingly... Or maybe it was just his eyes deceiving him. He didn't have a chance to fully think it through because the next thing he knew he was out of Camelot on the run with merlin.
Morgana pushed open the door to the throne room and looked around in revere. She walked to the throne Arthur once presided over and sat down. Gwen took her side standing next to her. "Camelot is now yours... Queen Morgana." Morgana smiled.
"Yes indeed it is. But it is not yet over Gwen. This is only the beginning."
"Guinevere can you believe it? I always knew she was a traitor... but not like this! "Arthur was pacing back and forth, fuming with anger.
"It's strange really." Merlin said lost in thought
"Merlin? Are you even listening to me?"
"Yes. I am. What I meant to say was Gwen; at first she seemed happy to be our ally. What changed so quickly that she sided with morgana and leaded an all-out attack on Camelot?"
Arthur looked down. He knew exactly what happened. But years of knowing Guinevere he never thought she could be this ruthless and deceptive. On the way to Merlin's so called "sanctuary" Arthur got to thinking. He thought about how he should just go back and fight to the death with morgana for his throne. He thought about how his people and his knights were. Did they survive, were they safe? Then he played his very own "blame game" where he tried to see who he could focus all his anger towards. He thought about placing it on Morgana but that didn't work. Then Gwen- he could place blame on many people for Gwen's actions, when honestly the only person to blame was himself. Arthur didn't know what to think anymore. He, Merlin, Gwaine, and Elyan were now stuck hiding out in elador until he could figure out how to make his next move. Morgana may have won the first battle, but Arthur was going to make damn sure she wasn't going to win the war.
"Merlin... If I tell you something, will you promise not to tell anybody else?"
"Of course." merlin said. Arthur motioned merlin to follow him outside where it was quiet and no one could hear. He stood by a brick wall and sighed. Time to let the cat out of the bag.
"Ok look, I'm not blaming myself for Camelot being overtaken by some overzealous witch and my betraying ex-lover. But I can tell you it maybe my fault... A little."
"What are you saying?"
"Before all of this happened, Gwen came to my room with every intent on killing me... With a dagger no less. Can you believe that?" he scoffed. Merlin gave an indifferent look waiting for him to go on, Arthur reluctantly continued. "But instead we ended up... Making love."
Merlin couldn't believe what he just heard. "I'm sorry say that last again?"
"Long story short... I thought we were going to work things out, but we ended up fighting again and I called her a whore."
"You called her a WHAT?"Merlin yelled completely shocked and confused by Arthur.
"Keep your voice down!" Arthur said to him.
"What possessed you to call the woman you love a whore?"
"She pushed me to say it I swear... Then she cryptically warned me that I would pay for all my sins. And I think her mind got so corrupted with hate that I drove her right into morgana's hands."
Merlin shook his head.
"Arthur... You got to make this right."
Arthur threw his hands in the air feeling completely defeated.
"How? How can I? I've been pushed out of my home, my people are dying left and right, the knights! They're all probably dead! And the woman I love more than anything in this world? Hates me... She sided with morgana because of me! It's all my doing Merlin. My father would turn over in his grave if he knew I let morgana take over Camelot. I'm a failure."
Merlin put his hand on Arthur's shoulder. "You had no way of knowing arrgravaine was working with them or any of it. Do not blame yourself."
Arthur swatted his hand away.
"There is NOONE to blame but me! Merlin. But I promise you I will find a way to take Camelot back and kill Morgana if I have to." he said with a very obvious anger boiling through.
As Arthur began walking away, Merlin called out to him. "... And Guinevere?"
Arthur stopped for a second with his back to Merlin. Then he kept going. He knew if the time called for it he would have to kill Gwen. But the question was could he?
Arthur walked away then Merlin got to thinking. He was the only one who could stop morgana. He needed a plan- a magical plan to take the witch down. And help Arthur get his kingdom back. But Gwen was a harder case, they were friends. Best friends. Had Morgana really corrupted her mind? Or was Gwen working out of her own volition. Merlin wanted to believe that maybe there was hope for her, and maybe she just needed to trust somebody again. But was he willing to do what needed to be done if Gwen stood in his way?
"Gwen you've been by my side all night. Go to your chambers, get some rest."
"I do not need to sleep my lady; I rather stay here and make sure your safe."
"Gwen Camelot is ours. No matter what plan Arthur and his very limited group of knights come up with we will always prevail... Get some sleep, please?" morgana pleaded. Gwen nodded then left the room. Morgana was right there was nothing more she could do. Gwen returned to her chambers and laid down. But she couldn't sleep; in fact the real reason she couldn't was because she kept having a recurring dream that Arthur and his knights would retake Camelot and kill her in the process. It frightened her. Not because she would die, Gwen no longer feared death, but because Arthur would be the one who killed her.
Gwen wouldn't put it past him. After all she did help his mortal enemy take over his throne. Gwen sighed thinking about it. When did it become so complicated? Her mission at first was to save Arthur Pen-Prat from himself. But after them sleeping together and his non apology and no remorse for banishing her and to top it off his "whore" comments; sent Gwen into overdrive. But she didn't mean for it to happen like this... All she wanted was a sincere apology and a mutual understanding. Even if he said they had too many problems to be together again. Instead all she got was great sex and a half assed explanation. Why couldn't Arthur be like normal men? Why did she think he deserved to be thought a lesson? Gwen decided to shut her mind down and she closed her eyes. Hoping for a better dream than Arthur murdering her in cold blood.
"Wake up silly." Arthur said. Gwen opened her eyes and saw Arthur lying next to her. She sat up abruptly and looked around. It was morning; she was naked under his blanket in his chambers. Gwen plopped back down and sighed.
"What's wrong beautiful?" Arthur said stroking his hand up and down her arm.
"What's wrong is I'm dreaming." Gwen replied thoroughly agitated.
"Then I'm guessing it's a good dream?" Arthur laughed softly and started to kiss the arm he was stroking.
Gwen pushed him away. "You don't understand this..." she pointed all around them." isn't real; we are mortal enemies Arthur- at war."
"Gwen... Do you always over think everything?"
"No! Maybe... Yes?" she admitted. "But only because this isn't real. In reality, you hate me Arthur... You wish me dead because I sided with morgana."
"Well answer me this... If you really are dreaming and you hate me so much and were enemies... Why dream instead that I love you and we share the same bed?"
"I... I don't know." she said softly. He opened the covers to let himself in and got on top of her.
"I do. It's because you do truly love me and you made a terrible mistake and you don't know if you are ever going to be able to fix it... Am I getting warm?"
He entered her slowly, giving her neck feather light kisses. She wrapped her legs around him feeling the pull of him inside her forgetting that this is just a dream.
"Yes! Yes! Yes! I do Arthur... I do." Gwen yelled.
She then woke up sweating. Embarrassed- She got up and removed the now wet sheets from her bed. Gwen couldn't believe she had a sex dream about Arthur. And what was all that talk about regret and terrible mistakes? Gwen shook it off. She didn't regret what she done. Then why was it hitting her like she had just smacked her face into a brick wall? Gwen went over to her window and looked out through the window pane. Camelot was in ruins all around her. The people in despair, the knights starving and angry... Morgana was in control and it was all Gwen's fault. Gwen found her chair in the dark room and sat down. Her thoughts now were so loud she could've sworn someone was whispering it to her: What happens when you make a terrible decision that you cannot change even if you wanted too?
