I hadn't seen anybody for three whole days. Everyone's been too worried to see me, saying that I should rest. Bullshit. Everyone knew that I was alright and they didn't want to bother themselves because they were busy living. And, it wasn't like I went crazy over my head for inviting them in my house, but still.
Charlie has been so worried that he has been trying to cook every meal and he's gotten me every medication I need. And, once he had told my mother, she cried for me on the phone and said that she would fly in as soon as she could.
I calmed her, and it took me these three days to tell her off politely. Though I did promise her that I'll visit her instead and that I really was fine. Charlie talked to her as well, and confirmed that I was good. Of course, he regretted telling that to my mom, but it was the right thing to do.
James, was another thing! He was moaning how his nose hurt, when I my ears were still ringing, and that dinner at Alice's wasn't a good idea, and he won't go there anymore, and that he didn't even like New York.
„You've never even been here." I snorted as we played video games in my room.
„Yeah, well. Now I know why. No offence, but this place sucks." He said in an I-know-everything voice.
How the fuck wasn't it supposed to be offensive? I fucking live here. This was home. „Yea, well, California is shit too. No offense."
He put down the controller and looked at me, a bit angrily „Yea, maybe coming here wasn't a good thing. I have a plane in the morning, so..."
I wasn't that surprised „Alright." I knew that we weren't together, we just used each other and to be honest, if I didn't know why we weren't in a relationship, I knew now – he was so fucking stupid. And, I hated that Californian accent.
Rosalie and Emmett, Alice and Jasper were having the time of their lives, not like me. They were young and they were all in love. At least it looked that way. And, I was let here sulking, with my pretend boyfriend, who was my actual fuck buddy, talking shit about the city I lived in and sulking his ass all over my cool apartment.
So when he left the next morning, I didn't really miss him, I was relieved actually. I could finally try and not look hot. And, my headache had subsided a lot!
Charlie had been relieved as well. He didn't really like the fella, so when I told Charlie that he left, he couldn't help but to say with a smile „Oh, no."
But, the happiest person must have been Carlisle.
Carlisle came over, to make sure that I was 'alright'. I was standing right behind Charlie, when Carlisle rang the doorbell „Hey there, Charlie. How are you?" he asked my dad, as he let him in. I remember how strained he had been last year, to even look at Charlie and now he was having a full conversation, in his apartment? Good for him. But what did that mean for the two of us?
„Good. I've been good. A little stressed about Bella over here. How have you been?" Charlie asked.
„I've been alright. I'm actually here to check in on her. See if everything's healing alright." He said, kindly smiling at Charlie. Was he really here on doctors duty? As the thought crossed my mind, I couldn't stop to feel a bit of pain. Maybe I really was still holding on to him, just a bit too much? Everything he did, I hoped he did it for me.
„Well, I'm actually off to the station." He said with a grimace „I hope you're going to find everything you need, if you have to." He said his good-bye's and left.
Now, I was left standing in the hallway with Carlisle Cullen, in my unsexy PJ pants and a tank top.
„So." I said.
„So." He smiled. Why the hell, was he in such a good mood?
„My own doctors visit?" I asked, dragging out the words „I must have got a good doctor. Or I'm special." I asked him sarcastically.
„I really have been worried about you, Bella." he said as he walked in the apartment.
„And?" I asked in an apathetic tone. I was a little hopeful though „We haven't called to the hospital. So, I do feel like a person should feel. " Lies. I still felt like shit. Today was actually better than the previous days.
„I actually wanted to talk to you." He said, slowly „If you're really feeling alright and if that's okay with you, of course."
I rolled my eyes as I turned and walked in the kitchen „Well then, go ahead." Again. Talking. What was this? Did he need me to forgive him? Was this because he was feeling guilty? If he was, what kind of guilt was he experiencing? Was he guilty because I was barely legal back then? „Carlisle, if you're feeling like you need to apologise, or something, then you shouldn't. What happened, happened." I went along and said it. I didn't want to beat around the bush, per se.
We sat down and Carlisle made a face „What?"
God, why is that when someone says that they want to talk to you, your head is spinning like crazy? And, then you jump to stupid conclusions? „Carlisle, just tell me, why are you here?" I was done guessing. I've been guessing everything about Carlisle, and I was tired of that shit. I really was.
„I was here because," he gulped and took a big breath „Jesus. Okay." I was about to yell at him to just get it out. And, then – „Bella, I want to take you out on a date."
Did I hear him right?
I felt giddy and happy. And, I felt a tinge of sadness as well „Why now?" did he want closure?
He looked at his hands, all traces of his good mood gone „There are no words. I've wanted to ask you out so many times. And, I'm sorry that I only realised this after I made you walk out on me. I needed you more that I waited to admit, then. But I really do miss you. And, I would like to take you out, on a proper date. " he looked up at me, his eyes sad and serious „For a whole year, I couldn't say anything because I thought you hated me so much. And, I don't blame you, if you did – or still do."
„So, you want to make up for your past mistakes?"
He shook his head „I can't ever make them alright, Bella. But what I can do, is to take you out, now. Not because I need closure, or I'm apologetic ... But because I really, really like and miss you."
I wanted to tell him to fuck off and at the same time I wanted to run in his hands and kiss him „You do realise I'm almost six hours away, by plane that is?"
„Not now. Now you're here. Why not enjoy yourself Bella?" he asked, purring like a kitten „You can leave your boyfriend at home, and we can do lovely things out."
I stood up and went to the fridge „Well ... He's not my boyfriend, never has been. And, he had a flight home this morning, so, in every single syllable in the word – I am single." I puffed „Do you want something? I'm making a tea."
„Thank you, but no. You did just say that you two weren't ... really together. I was wondering about that."
I scowled at him „I'm not telling you all my secrets, just because you asked me out." Why was I so angry at him? Was it because it had taken him a whole year to ask me out? Was it because I didn't want to hope that something good was going to happen to me? Why didn't I let myself be happy? I think I would get too emotional if I let myself feel something other than angry.
He stood up „I should have known that you would say 'no' to me."
Fuck! I ran to his side, to stop him from moving „Wait!" I almost yelled at him „ I didn't say no." I mumbled.
„I don't want to guess anymore, Bella. I want you back and I want to take you out. I don't know about you, but I've been miserable this whole time – this whole year. I really want to take you out, do you want me to take you out?" He looked at me with such serenity and hopefulness, I couldn't help, but the gentle nod.
„I've wanted nothing more, for the past year." I answered him „This doesn't mean I'm not angry at you."
But how could I when all he wanted to do was put the pieces back together, stronger than they were before?
The reviews are totally amazing!
7 reviews = next chapter
