A/N: Very long chapter…it just kept flowing. As a result, I didn't include as much as I had planned from the previous preview. As much as I love dark, somber storylines, I wanted to try writing something decidedly opposite of the last chapter's tone. Writing the flashback was ALOT harder (aka awkward) than I thought possible.
Quick shoutout to reviewers: Nightheart: rereading your early reviews reminded me again that I intended this to be Renji-centric so thanks for getting me back on track. Firisu: thanks for your steady and encouraging reviews…glad you like! TheCrazyChickinBlack: love your Twenty Tales fic – it helps me create some of the bantering moments here, few that there are – ha! Anonymous K: glad to have you on board Snowkid: see my preview note below! AlmondCrushCookie: yummy name…thanks for reading! : thanks for being the first review!
Warnings: Flashback is a lemon (no unpleasantness) with some implied unpleasantness just before for setup. Some violence with Zaraki…as to be expected.
Tanabata: I know this isn't very well explained in the flashback and I openly acknowledge that I've taken liberties with the festival to sort of make it work (particularly with the retelling of the traditional story and the wish making). I apologize that I didn't firmly research it and stick to its accuracy 100% in favor of setting up a frame for the more important lemon. Feel free to criticize or suggest a better way to do it. Critique = better writing.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything that is Bleach, nor do I profit from my admiration
Chapter 7: Coping Mechanisms
Rangiku didn't want to wake up. She was resting on a soft, sumptuous cloud with the gentle fragrance of spring hyacinth and mint, almost sickeningly sweet and reminiscent of her youth. Sighing, she opened her eyes and slowly looked around. She was lying on a large bed with plush white blankets and she laughed softly as she realized this was the cloud from her dream. Momentarily confused, she sat up to observe her surroundings. The room was surprisingly comfortable, even luxurious, but the minimalist furniture gave little indication of where she was or who owned the room.
Standing, her hand went to her throat, feeling the collar she vaguely remembered Momo snapping into place. She had been taken by surprise when her friend had fired a binding spell on her without incantation. Distracted by Grimmjow and Ikkaku's fight, she hadn't realized until it was too late that Momo had bound her and pulled her through the garganta. Rukia had essentially done the same with Orihime, though the human girl hadn't struggled, blindly trusting Rukia until it was too late. Rangiku hadn't seen either of them or anyone else since Momo had clipped her on the back of the head, only to wake in the present room.
Moving around, she saw a basin of water and a small cloth on the lone table along with a fresh white kosode. Carefully, Rangiku dipped the cloth in the water and washed her face and neck. Regretfully she passed on changing her clothes, though she couldn't resist handling the soft material. Looking around, her eyes settled on a shelf in the corner that held a bowl of dried persimmons. Stiffening with sudden realization, she felt her chest constrict painfully and her heart beat erratically. Dried persimmons were her favorite, but more importantly, they were his as well. They were the one thing he gave out freely when he became a captain. The lingering scent of mint from her dream, another of his favorites, meant that he had been there while she was asleep.
She struggled to feel anger and revulsion that he had been so close while she was defenseless, forcefully reminding herself that he had betrayed Soul Society, nearly killed Hiyori, slaughtered Central 46, and would kill again. Desperately she tried to hate him, tried to feel indifferent…but their history was too strong to be overcome by recent events, however horrific.
Frustrated at her conflicted emotions she allowed angry tears to fall as her mind wandered to her rigid but beloved captain and how he was handling her kidnapping. She was so absorbed in her own thoughts, she failed to realize the door had opened and a figure stood silently watching her.
"Rangiku-san."
Her name was uttered as a caress, softly and seductively. Recognizing the smooth voice, she froze as slender arms encircled her from behind. Stiffening, she tried to twist away but the thin arms tightened painfully against her heaving chest. She felt his breath just behind her ear as he exhaled into her hair after breathing in deeply. Goosebumps prickled her flesh and she felt her eyes start to sting as memories flooded her senses.
Slowly, one arm loosened enough to move lightly across her chest, slipping under her kosode to gently massage her now straining breast. Relaxing slightly, Rangiku unconsciously arched her back, pressing into his embrace and allowing her head to fall back onto his shoulder. Closing her eyes, she felt him nuzzle the sensitive spot under her jaw line and when his lips pressed against her offered throat she couldn't quite suppress the moan that slipped out.
Gasping at the sound, Rangiku's mind overpowered her traitorous body and she clawed at the teasing hand that felt so treacherously wonderful. Briefly, his arms tightened against her before they unexpectedly released her. Whirling around, she slapped him hard across the face, her whole body trembling in anger and something else her mind refused to admit.
"Don't. Touch. Me."
He was still smiling and Rangiku backed up slowly, waiting for him to react as she saw the grin fade. He moved fluidly to the table and the disregarded kosode, gently stroking the silk before letting it slide through his fingers to the ground.
Unsettled, Rangiku waited for him to say something, anything to break the unbearable silence. She watched as the silver-haired man carefully pulled a small object from his sleeve and set it on the table. It was a silver box with two, perfectly wrapped, wintermint candies.
"Because I missed your last birthday."
Seeing the candies he had been so fond of in their youth shattered the last strands of Rangiku's resolve. She could handle his deceit, his independence of her, even the acute distaste everyone around her felt for him, but she could not handle his sentimentality and nostalgia.
"How could you just, why didn't you just…just…why didn't you tell me you were leaving?" Rangiku could barely form the questions she so desperately wanted to ask.
He settled into his customary smile again as he turned and sighed, pausing a moment before he walked past her to the door.
"No! Wait!" Rangiku flew to the door, grabbing his arm and trying to ignore the pleading in her voice. Hating that she couldn't see his eyes, she pressed against him, hugging him fiercely as if she could squeeze understanding out of him. His willowy body remained unyielding as he merely waited until she gave up a few moments later. Lowering her arms, she stepped back, hanging her head slightly as he silently moved past her and out the door.
When he was gone, Rangiku slowly moved to the bed and sat down, pressing a hand to her mouth to stifle the sobs welling up. As tears flowed down her cheeks, she hated him for leaving her again, and hated more that she wanted him to stay.
*******
"Freak."
"SHUT UP!"
Mayuri's thin reserve of patience snapped. He flung a glass beaker at the animal he had strung on the lab table. Despite all of his experiments, Zaraki had refused to stop laughing at him and for that, Mayuri determined to kill him slowly and painfully. In the beginning he had poked, prodded, and poisoned the man for scientific reasons. Zaraki's vast reiatsu despite a lack of resonance with his zanpakuto had initially interested him. However, his noble pursuit for knowledge had quickly morphed into the singular goal of getting the hated man to break.
Gin had once suggested gagging Zaraki to block out his insults but it hadn't muffled the laughter. Nemu made the grievous error of telling Zaraki why they tried the gag and Mayuri had literally torn her limbs off in a rage. It was two days before he put her back together, more because he needed her help than because he had calmed down.
As expected, Zaraki had become even more irritating, constantly nettling him and laughing at every opportunity. Beating the man only encouraged the beast and Mayuri found himself constantly trying new ways to kill his nemesis before Aizen lightly suggested letting Grimmjow and Yammy practice fighting against him. Normally, Mayuri would have been elated unleashing the two battle thirsty Espada on a useless, reiatsu blocked specimen, except that Zaraki loved that. And it hadn't been a suggestion so much as an order.
"This is ridiculous!" Mayuri screamed as his mind obsessed on all the reasons he hated Zaraki. Thinking about Aizen's order to keep the man alive infuriated him even more and he overturned his desk in a fit of rage.
"Hey freak, you finally realize that you're Aizen's fool?"
"Shut up, SHUT UP!" Mayuri grabbed a random test tube containing a dark blue liquid and threw it at the restrained man. He smiled triumphantly as the grisly smell of burning flesh filled the room. His victory was short lived though as Zaraki barked out a laugh.
"You think this hurts? You're pathetic."
Mayuri raced around the overturned desk to hit Zaraki viciously. Fueled by Zaraki's laughter, he continued to slap his face until his palm stung. Grabbing the closest thing within reach, his fingers brushed cold metal as he snatched up a scalpel. Grinning maniacally, he leaned over Zaraki, watching as the man's eyes followed the gleaming instrument.
"Oh, not laughing anymore?" Mayuri hissed.
"Stupid, you do realize that's not a zanpakuto." Zaraki grinned.
Screaming, Mayuri moved to attack the laughing captain before his arm was suddenly held fast by Grimmjow who easily snapped the scientist's arm.
"Save it freak. Time to spar." Grimmjow laughed as Mayuri began raging again, destroying much of his own equipment.
Carelessly, Grimmjow put a less restrictive collar on Zaraki, released the restraints, and tossed him his zanpakuto. Zaraki stood, rolled his shoulders a few times and knocked over another table as he followed Grimmjow out of the lab. Other than worrying about Yachiru, Zaraki didn't half mind his stay in Las Noches. He got to fight good opponents, could annoy the freak without any real repercussions, and he didn't have to do paperwork or listen to boring meetings. There were worse things to live through.
*******
Byakuya stood quietly in his room, suspended by his arms. Meditating, he tried to imagine the latest argument Zaraki and Mayuri made on a daily basis with relative success. He wondered how Rukia was doing - he hadn't been allowed to really see her since her torture. When he had lifted her broken body into his lap and cradled her against him, he had never felt so angry or so helpless. Rage as he had never known filled him and when they took her away in the morning, he snapped and attacked them like a rabid animal. After restraining him, they had merely laughed and left him locked in the room, mostly forgotten for weeks.
One night, Aizen finally came to him again. He didn't say anything, simply stood and watched. After about twenty minutes, Aizen silently left. Over the next few weeks, Aizen continued to come in to watch him for various amounts of time
Momo occasionally checked on him but that was usually just to throw food in and listen to see if he moved. Each time she came, she updated him on how much time had passed since her last call. On her most recent visit, she informed him that it had been three months since his capture, and two months since Rukia had been taken from him. Once he saw Gin watching him through the window in the door and he reluctantly asked his former colleague for information about Rukia. Gin had merely laughed and asked if he would like to pass her a message. Without hesitating, he had blurted out the first thing on his mind.
"I ask for her forgiveness."
Gin had sighed sympathetically and nodded, only to laugh a moment later.
"Byakuya, you're such a terrible brother, she's free to walk around and she hasn't once asked to see you."
Knowing that Gin loved mind games, Byakuya refused to play along. However, as more days went by, he felt himself doubting his conviction and the uncertainty was beginning to eat away at his control. He had always preferred quiet solitude since Hisana's death, but his dark confinement was less than soothing. With little food, his strength waned and he retreated further and further into his inner world. Senbonzakura was a constant source of relief and Byakuya drew comfort from his steady anchor, but even he was growing weaker as time passed. They began to worry if and when the time would come that Byakuya would not be able to pull away from their inner world to face the harshness of reality.
After another month had passed, Aizen appeared to move Byakuya to another bare room far away from where he had been. Mayuri was there waiting and Gin arrived a few minutes later with Rukia in tow.
Though her brother stood in front of her unharmed, the illusion Aizen created told a much different story. To Rukia, her beloved brother looked shattered; ugly, gaping wounds laced his body and a foul odor from infection assaulted her nose. His breathing was raspy and his once slender frame was now gaunt, with bones protruding painfully through stretched, bruised, skin. Rukia reached out to go to her brother but Gin hauled her back roughly by the hair. At Aizen's nod, she was dragged out of the room and the door slammed shut, the noise jarring to Byakuya's now sensitive ears.
"She thinks you've been tortured." Aizen said softly.
Turning his gray eyes to brown ones, Byakuya waited for Aizen to continue.
Smiling, Aizen knew that Byakuya wanted him to continue without prodding. Lucky for him, Aizen felt generous.
"She'll do anything I say now to relieve you of pain. She's easily manipulated."
Aizen paused to see if Byakuya would react and was delighted when the younger man refused to be baited.
"At first I wanted to physically dominate you. I planned to beat you, use you, fuck you, break you, but in the end, it was too…vulgar." Aizen smiled as he saw the gray eyes tighten.
"I could do that to anyone. It isn't a challenge. When the body weakens, the mind follows. I can make you come for me, make you beg for my touch, for release even as your mind abhors it and rejects it the moment after surrender." Aizen reached forward and roughly grabbed Byakuya's disheveled hair and yanked his head up, kissing him harshly, tongue forcing his lips open as Aizen took full possession of his mouth.
Pulling away abruptly, Aizen smirked when he saw Byakuya's eyes light up angrily as he unconsciously pulled against his restraints.
"You do respond beautifully."
Instantly Byakuya's mask slipped into place and he stilled his body's movements. Coolly, he watched as Aizen walked out of the room, pausing before he closed the door.
"I'm going to keep you here Byakuya, and not do anything to you. I will come and watch you, every day as you slowly lose control. Your mind is what I wish to possess, and taking you physically only gives your mind something to fight against. I will have you. I will wait until you forget who you are and what you were. In the end, you will know nothing except this room and me. That is absolute domination and I quiver in anticipation at your true breaking."
Alone again in the dark, Byakuya let himself sigh softly. He hadn't been afraid of physical pain, unpleasant and distasteful as it could be, he knew he could withstand anything Aizen could do. He had worried slightly about Rukia and knew that he would be powerless in the future if Aizen chose to exploit that weakness.
He knew his mind was strong and his willpower formidable. He would be able to withstand the isolation, continuing to meditate with Senbonzakura and wait for rescue. At least Rukia would be safe, relatively. Grimacing slightly, he rather hoped it wouldn't be Ichigo or his own irritating fukutaichou who found him and released him. Exasperating as it was, all Byakuya had to do was wait.
*******
Rukia was emotionally exhausted. Thankfully, she had been ordered to drop Orihime off with Isane after taking her hairpins. Her friend had looked so hurt when she left her and Rukia didn't have the strength to keep ignoring the girl's tearful pleas for explanation.
She shuddered as she remembered seeing her brother a month earlier, hanging in his cell, far away from the rest of the rooms in Las Noches. He hadn't even recognized her! When Aizen had calmly told her that she could end his suffering, she had fought against trusting his words. But he had taken her day after day to observe her brother through the small window in the door, watching as he steadily deteriorated under Gin's "progress reports." One week later, she had quietly agreed to bring Orihime back to Las Noches. A small, tiny voice in the back of her mind screamed against believing that Orihime's powers were needed in order to fully heal her brother, but the greater part of her mind grasped at any flimsy justification for bringing her friend back to this hell.
As the two weeks of planning for the mission passed, Rukia had slowly convinced herself that she was doing the right thing. Byakuya's condition didn't worsen, but it didn't get better either as Momo bluntly pointed out on their daily visits to his cell. Rukia had briefly considered relaying some sort of message to Ichigo or Renji if she saw either of them while grabbing Orihime, but Aizen seemed to read her mind. He stole quietly into her bare cell the night before they were to leave and pinned her against the wall, his hand squeezing her throat and cutting off her air.
"If you talk to anyone other than Orihime while you are there, I will turn Byakuya into a hollow and leave him to starve for souls before allowing him to have Isane-san. Every prisoner I capture I will feed him and after a few days, the hollow in him won't be able to resist."
Filled with anger, fear, and horror, Rukia realized she was powerless to do anything other than what Aizen wanted on this mission. Sensing her surrender, Aizen slowly and deliberately took off her shihakushou and released her throat. Knowing what he wanted, Rukia robotically began undressing him, hoping he would be fast tonight in light of the events unfolding the next day. As he pushed her down to her knees and grabbed her hair with both hands, Rukia thankfully blanked her mind and retreated into the haven of her memories.
FLASHBACK:
It was a beautiful evening and she was desperately grateful that Nii-sama had agreed to attend Tanabata this year. She always loved the star festival when she lived in Rukongai, and it had been tradition for her to regale the little ones with the story about two lovers separated by an angry father who only allowed his daughter to see her husband one day a year on Tanabata if she fulfilled her family duty of weaving. Each year she embellished the story a little more until finally Renji had blown up at her for "completely twisting it into nothing but complete crap."
Asshole.
She loved helping the younger kids write their wishes on slips of paper and carefully hang them on the bamboo tree in the hopes that their wishes would be fulfilled. The boys always resisted, claiming that they were too mature for such nonsense and that wishes were never granted in Inuzuri, but Rukia had stubbornly insisted that they all participate in the tradition. She knew that Renji in particular never hung his wishes, she had seen him tear the strips of paper up when he thought no one was watching and it had filled her with unexpected sadness.
Vaguely Rukia wondered if Nii-sama had written anything to hang and then dismissed the idea as foolish. Of course he wouldn't have, he barely consented to coming at all. He had fallen back to speak with someone from the Shihoin clan and Rukia took the moment to hang her carefully written wish. Walking towards the bamboo tree that Seireitei had erected, she kept her head down so she wouldn't have to see the sidelong glances from her peers. Even after they had graduated from the academy and obtained their own seated positions, her expedited advancement to the Gotei 13 prevented her from making many friends. It made her all the more grateful for Ukitake-taichou, Kaien-dono and the familial division they led.
Suddenly, she felt a large hand on her shoulder and turned, expecting her brother. To her surprise, she stared up into familiar, crimson eyes.
"Oh, Renji…" She couldn't seem to find her voice.
"Hey squirt. I'm surprised you're here with the common folk." Renji's voice sounded playful, though his eyes remained cool.
"Don't be like that, you know I love Tanabata." Rukia lowered her eyes, more than a little hurt that Renji had joined the group of peers that held her at arm's length. She hadn't seen him in over a year and she hated to admit that the last meeting had been similar. Renji had been friendly but cold at the same time. She heard through Kiyone that he had been moved to Zaraki's division and that he was well liked by many people beyond his graduating class. She was more than a little envious that he assimilated so easily, and more than a little hurt that he had neglected her.
"Aw Rukia, I'm sorry. I didn't want to come tonight but Momo and Kira made me."
Rukia looked up cautiously, happy that his stance had relaxed into the apology and that his voice had picked up a note of whining.
"Did you make a wish this year?" Rukia smiled softly as she walked with him over to the tree and scoped out a branch for her own.
"Yeah, I did. And don't bother askin' because I'm not tellin' you." Renji laughed, hanging his tanzaku on a branch far above Rukia's head.
"Ha, as if I'd want to know what your hopes and dreams are." Rukia teased but paused as she saw Renji's shoulders stiffen. "Renji, I'm just kidding, I didn't mean anything by it."
Gently, Renji brushed some of the hanging tanzaku with his fingers, staring beyond the top of the tree to the stars above before looking down at Rukia with hooded eyes.
"I do have hopes and dreams Rukia, even if it doesn't seem like it. I'm not…trivial."
Wide-eyed and feeling slightly shamed, Rukia impulsively grabbed his sleeve. "Of course you do, I never thought you didn't Renji. You, you're not trivial…you're strong and brave. Everyone likes you…you have it so easy." Rukia's voice trailed off and it was her turn to stiffen and avert her gaze. She expected him to retort back or to at least say something condescending but instead he gently took her hand that clutched his sleeve and wrapped it with his own.
"Want to get some food? Maybe some…taiyaki?" Renji grinned mischievously.
Feeling the tense mood lighten, Rukia smiled when he suggested his favorite food before she hesitated. "I don't know, I have to ask Nii-sama."
"Oh right, I forgot. Well, maybe some other time, I'm sure he'll want to go home before it gets too late."
Rukia hated the overly happy tone Renji had suddenly taken on, having years to analyze her few interactions with him since that fateful day he encouraged her adoption. He always turned into a babbling, enthusiastic fool whenever he spoke of her new family and she longed for the tough talking, straight shooting kid that would chew her a new one whenever the hell he pleased. Stiff with resolve and more than a little irritation she snapped at the grinning idiot in front of her.
"I'm hungry. Let's go, you buy."
Feeling his hesitation, she yanked on his hand that was still holding hers and marched to the food vendors. They proceeded to buy four taiyaki, laughing as Renji burned his tongue in his haste to bite into the tasty treat. After that, they walked around leisurely, admiring the different decorations that were entered into competition. They bumped into Matsumoto and Hisagi who convinced them to indulge in some sake with them and by the time they walked back to the bamboo tree, Rukia was happier than she could remember in a long time, her brother long forgotten.
They were sitting and looking up at the sky, Rukia thinking about the two stars in the story that were only allowed to meet once a year by permission. Sighing contentedly, she leaned slightly against Renji, the sake eroding her now ingrained formality.
"Come home with me."
Rukia's breath hitched as the impact of his words hit her. Pulling away, she turned to study his profile, still turned towards the sky.
"You know I can't Renji." She felt her happiness slipping through her fingers like grains of sand. Why did he have to ruin this?
"You can, you just don't want to." His voice remained calm and quiet, disguising the accusation flung at her.
"It doesn't matter if I want to or not, it doesn't change the fact that I can't." Rukia crossed her arms and gripped the tops painfully to stop the trembling that threatened to overtake her whole body. "Isn't this enough?"
Renji finally looked down at her, watching as she seemed to cave in on herself and hating that he caused it. Careful not to touch her, he shifted his position until he was directly in front of her.
"Rukia, it will never be enough. I will always want you, it's not something I can just shut off. Believe me, I've tried."
Suddenly angry, she raised her head to glare at him and poked him hard in the chest.
"Really. Seems like I remember you shoving me away in the woods when I flung myself like an idiot at you." Poking didn't seem drastic enough, so she balled her hand into a fist and slugged him in the shoulder. She succeeded in bruising her own hand. Of course.
"Rukia, that was completely different. That would have destroyed everything, you were just trying to erase someone else and you didn't care how much it would hurt me after." Renji glanced down as she rubbed her now aching fist, trying to stay serious and not smile as she tried to hide her obvious discomfort.
He waited for her to meet his intense gaze again before he tried one last time, promising himself that he would stop if she refused again.
"Come home with me."
"Renji…"
"Do you want to?"
"It doesn't-"
"Do you want to?" Renji pressed, hoping his gut instincts were right, knowing that he was probably exploiting a vulnerability and not caring.
"Yes…but-"
Renji instantly was up and dragging her back to the eleventh division. She knew she should object but all of the protests her mind had been throwing at her faded and all she felt was anticipation.
"Renji, people will see us!" She looked around nervously, people may have seen them leaving but the eleventh division was empty.
"Nah, they're out celebrating. Even the captain. There's no one back this early, trust me. Besides, has being a noble made you forget how to sneak around?" Renji's cocky smile was blinding.
Rolling her eyes, she quickly kicked his heel out from under him, causing him to stumble but not fall.
"Hmph." She was slightly annoyed that his balance had gotten better.
Arriving at his quarters, he pulled her in and shut the door before going to light some lanterns. As expected, his quarters were spartan and functional, with just a few random piles of bandages and discarded parts of uniforms laying around.
Suddenly nervous, Rukia stood rigidly by the door, wondering if she should just leave and save them both a lot of awkwardness. As if sensing her skittishness, Renji strode over to her and lifted her easily into his arms, kissing her hard in the process. Taken by surprise, Rukia threw her arms around him, feeling self-conscious at his close proximity and exhilarated at the same time.
Walking to the bedroom, Renji gently laid Rukia on her back on the futon. He started to light the lantern but Rukia shook her head. Quickly, she moved to the window and pulled aside the covering, letting the pale moonlight slant in. Feeling nervous, she moved back to the center of the futon and closed her eyes, bracing herself for what would come next.
She felt the mattress shift as Renji climbed next to her and held her breath, remembering their last disastrous attempt together. Gently, he pushed the stray hair from between her eyes and kissed her softly on the forehead, his lips dry and warm. Starting in surprise, she opened her mouth to speak but he gently pressed one finger to her lips.
"Shh, just let go."
His soft lips traveled to her temple and down to tug gently on her earlobe. The sweet sensations caused by his mouth gathered heat as he remained careful and tender. He moved to cup the side of her face as he continued to nuzzle her ear and she found herself melting into his rough hand, offering better access to her neck and letting out a happy sigh. Tentatively, she reached up to grasp his forearm, anchoring herself to him as the slow burn in her belly began to grow. He gently nudged her legs apart with one knee as he carefully moved from her side to settle lightly between her legs, bracing himself on his forearms, his hands moving to pillow her head.
Opening her eyes, she looked up to see Renji's face, half bathed in moonlight looking at her as if she were the most miraculous thing in the world. She felt the last remnants of hesitation leave her body as she smiled softly at her oldest friend. Slowly, he leaned down to press his wondrous lips to hers in a firm but yielding kiss, allowing her to deepen it shyly before his natural instinct overruled and he took control. Whimpering, Rukia dug her fingers into his arms and arched her back towards him as he slowly and completely ravished her mouth.
Without any guidance, her hands tugged at his shihakushou before growing frustrated and began to tear at her own in an attempt to get closer to him. Renji shifted his weight and easily untied his obi, tossing it to the floor before quickly untying hers. Breaking the kiss, he rested his head on her shoulder while she tried to gather enough sense to divest him of the annoying clothes that kept him from her.
Her whole body felt like it was on fire. It had started as a slow burn, she didn't even know when it began, only that it threatened to consume her now. She had expected him to pretty much throw her on the futon, tear her clothes off and rock her world. She hadn't planned that he'd want to slowly torture her, make her veins burn with need, eliciting whimpers with just a kiss. Kami, where did he learn to kiss.
She suddenly wanted to see him, all of him. He'd grown a lot since they first entered the academy and he'd acquired some interesting tattoos. She figured he'd been influenced by Hisagi fukutaichou since they hung out all the time and he had his own interesting tattoos. She grudgingly admitted that the tribal ink only added to Renji's already scorching sex appeal.
Renji groaned as he felt her small hands pull his kosode from his hakama and push it down his shoulders. When he still didn't move to help her, she moved her hands up to his head band, quickly slipping it off and throwing it across the room. Deftly, her fingers tugged off the hair tie and released the thick, crimson strands down his shoulders. When he still didn't move, she fisted her hands tightly in his silky tresses and tugged his head up hard. Shocked, Renji's eyes opened to see her violet orbs heavy with lust and flickering with impatience.
"Renji…I want..." She frowned slightly as she struggled to voice her desire out loud. Instead she pulled his head down and kissed him hard, the raging fire demanding to be sated.
Panting lightly at her boldness, Renji quickly discarded the bunched kosode and in one fluid motion, freed his legs of the tangled hakama. Sliding a muscular arm under her back, he quickly flipped them over so that she was laying on his now naked body. She continued to kiss him passionately as he pulled her uniform off, tearing her hakama in the process.
Freed at last, Rukia sat up and straddled his hips, drinking in the sight of his bare chest and the supremely smug grin he wore. Renji bent his knees and pulled his legs up so she could lean back against them as she sat in silence, her eyes washing over him hungrily. She shifted once over his angular hips and he groaned as her essence slid against his straining erection.
Pushing her back farther on his legs, he hooked his hands behind her bent knees and shifted her hips forward, groaning again as her rounded ass pressed against his groin. Propping his head up on some pillows, he gently placed his rough hands on the tops of her firm thighs, brushing first one thumb then the other across her moist heat. At his touch, Rukia nearly fell over, the sensations flooding her senses and tearing a raw moan from her.
Laughing softly, Renji pushed her back against his legs again and pulled her hips forward a little more so that her head could rest on the tops of his knees. Kami she was so tiny. Slowly, he began to rub the small bud hidden in her folds with his thumbs, gently dipping the tips into her heat to wet them. Watching her lose herself to his touch was breathtaking, her small firm breasts straining as her whole body quivered with each soft rub.
He kept stroking her with his left thumb, slowly and deliberately as he moved his right hand to the heat of her entrance. He dipped the tip of his middle finger into her slick folds and felt her muscles clench around him at the intrusion. Slowly he pushed in, feeling her body strain against him, virginally tight after three years of celibacy. Giving her a moment to get used to his finger, he pulled out again before repeating the motion a few times.
"Another, Renji, please!' Her voice pleaded as he carefully pushed his index finger into her tight folds. Her hands searched for something to latch onto, but in her position there was nothing to grab except the angular planes of his hips, positioned slightly behind her. Finding purchase, she slowly pushed, pressing herself onto his fingers and relishing the fullness she felt as they curled inside her, stretching her, preparing her. At some point her moans had turned to soft sobs as he stroked her, and as he brushed lightly against the bundle of nerves deep inside her that pushed her to the very brink of ecstasy, she held back with every ounce of control she had. Finding a strength she didn't know she still possessed, she pushed off of him and laid on her back, opening her legs and staring him down lustfully.
Seeing her challenge and invitation, Renji finally let himself believe that this was really happening and positioned himself at her entrance, groaning as he felt how wet and hot she was. Pushing in the tip, he briefly paused. She was still so tight and though he was insanely proud of his girth, he was a little worried that she still wasn't prepared.
"Renji, please!" The note of need in her voice snapped him out of his haze and he let go of the iron control he had maintained until now. Thrusting in powerfully, knowing that any pain would subside quickly, he was unprepared for the ragged sob and the instant well of tears that spilled over her thick lashes. Horrified, he moved to pull out, half disgusted that he was still harder than hell despite her pain.
"Don't you dare." She gritted out as another sob slipped through. Her slender arms wrapped around him tightly and she buried her face in his chest. Keeping himself tightly in check, he gently stroked her hair and whispered nonsense as he felt her muscles slowly loosen around him. He laid there for a few agonizing moments before he tentatively thrust again. His first thrust into her tightness alone nearly made him come and the pressure building from remaining still was nearly excruciating. He heard her whimper but her grip on his back loosened as he slowly pulled out to the tip again before thrusting back in.
Rukia had thought she'd been prepared for the pain but his first thrust had taken her breath away. Clinging to him tightly, she concentrated on relaxing her body as he held her gently, as if she'd break. In that moment, while he whispered loving, incoherent words to ease away her pain, she knew she loved him with every fiber of her being. She'd been such a fool to think he'd forgotten her. As she felt him move slightly she still felt pain, but the fire that had burned so brightly before began to flare again. She felt him begin to pull out and involuntarily clenched against his absence, sending tremors of pleasure through her core. As he plunged back in, she tried clenching him again and was rewarded by a deep groan.
Focusing on her own pleasure and his throaty cries, the pain quickly disappeared only to be replaced with an intense yearning for release. Renji was thrusting faster and faster into her, filling her completely. The friction between their bodies intense and unrelenting. As the fire burned hotter, she felt constricted, as if she'd been holding her breath under water and her body struggled and strained for freedom. Almost afraid of letting go but unable to deny her body any longer, the dam finally released as she came in a long and ragged cry, her lover's name torn from her lips.
Hearing her cry his name sent Renji hurtling over the edge in an explosion that seemed to tear his whole body apart. Thrusting hard until he fully emptied his seed, he collapsed on top of her, unable to feel his feet and his heart hammering harder than his first encounter with a Hollow.
Basking in the moonlight, Rukia felt her heart would explode. Renji had settled back on the futon and was snoring lightly after getting up to get a dampened cloth to gently wash her with. Sighing contentedly, she snuggled back into him, smiling as he groaned in his sleep and his arm tightened protectively against her stomach.
"Love you Renji."
*******
Sitting alone in her cell, Rukia smiled at the memory that had saved her from Aizen's last visit the day before. She didn't want to remember the rest of that memory. She didn't want to remember the loud banging on the door when Ikkaku had burst into the room to shake Renji awake and throw her clothes on the bed, hissing for her to get out. Renji in his confusion had grabbed Zabimaru and threatened his mentor as she hastily got dressed. Rukia had wanted to talk to Renji but Ikkaku was already hauling her out of Renji's apartment, telling her to get out and leave Renji alone. It wasn't until she got home that she realized Byakuya knew she had gone with someone back to the eleventh division and he had quietly gone to Ikkaku to fix the problem. Without ever acknowledging who she had slept with, Byakuya had quietly reminded her of her place in his house and that he would swiftly take care of anyone who would dare forget that she was now a Kuchiki. Apparently Renji got a similar message because it would be a long time before he even looked at her again, and that was just by accident.
Seeing Renji today had been unexpected and she deliberately avoided looking at him, though his reiatsu had pushed against her familiarly and she wished more than anything that circumstances in her life were different.
Sighing, Rukia pushed the thought from her mind and allowed herself to indulge in the dangerous pastime of daydreaming what could have been had Byakuya not known about their tryst. Smiling, Rukia added another embellishment to her Tanabata story. Two lovers kept apart by family and duty, allowed to escape to the world of the living and be happy. For the first time since she arrived in Hueco Mundo, Rukia fell asleep peacefully.
Preview: Offensive into Hueco Mundo (Soul Society and Real World arcs merge so we don't have to keep skipping around)
Snowkid: I did forget about Nanao and she will have a much bigger role coming up, thanks for the reminder!
