Chapter 6: New Leads

Will and I ghosted through the streets, avoiding vehicles and foot traffic. We even took to the trees a few times when crossing through the park; there were a few couples out and about necking on the benches. Crossing the trees was exhilarating, it was almost like flying. We had to leap from branch to branch, making no noise so as not to startle anyone in the grass below. At one point I had a misstep and started to topple from the tree, but I threw an arm out just in time; my senses were so much faster now. It was nothing to just reach my hand out at the right moment and catch a sturdy branch. I swung to a halt, and then flipped back into the higher branches. I could hear Will chuckling a few trees over, laughing at my clumsiness. I guess even vampire reflexes couldn't make up for inherent klutziness. Without any more tumbles, we made it to the library unseen. It was only about eight at night, so the library was still open. We gave each other a quick glance, and I shrugged. I didn't notice anything wrong with Will the first time I'd looked at him, so I assumed no one else would notice either. I took two steps toward the building before I remembered why we couldn't be seen.

"Wait!" I hissed, grabbing Will's arm and leaping into the shadows to the side the building. "I can't believe I forgot why we were sneaking around. We're both dead, remember?"

"You're dead," he corrected. "I'm a murderer." My heart froze.

"W-what are you talking about?"

"My room was a crime scene when I woke up, remember? I saw no sign my parents had come running when I was probably screaming for mercy from my creator. And I certainly could not have shed that much blood on the walls myself…." I gaped at him, realizing he was probably right. I laid my head on his chest, knocking him gently against the wall. My arms encircled his waist, squeezing gently.

"I'm so sorry," I offered in a whisper. "You shouldn't have to go through that." He hesitated with his arms half up, as if afraid to hold on to me. I burrowed closer to his chest, trying to offer some semblance of comfort to this boy who had lost everything, even me. He slowly put his arms around me, and I could feel him trembling around me.

"Well, you're a murderer too," he tried joking. His words sent a sharp knife into my heart, and I leaned away, shooting a withering glare at him. "Okay, okay, not funny. I got it." He pulled me close again, as if not wanting to let go of my compassion. "I'm sorry, too. I shouldn't have made you do that, creation be damned."

"You had to send me," I defended into Will's shirt. "Even if you didn't know."

"There must have been another way. I shouldn't have made you." His arms tightened, crushing me to his chest as he buried his face in my shoulder. He was trembling faster, and I slid my arms from around Will's waist, eliciting a whimper from him. He glanced up at me, with a look of fear and longing in his eyes. It was as if he was watching me from far away, unable to reach across a void of darkness back to me. It pained me to see him that way, as if all hope had fled his heart. "Please," he whispered. "Don't…" Without thinking, I slid my arms around his neck and pulled him back to me, kissing him on the lips. My response shocked him into stillness, and I pulled away, ashamed of myself.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "I didn't think before I…" I turned my head away, sick at what I did, especially with Daniel's blood still caked under my nails. I twisted away from Will's frozen hold on me, trying to tear myself away from the hurt I surely must have just caused him. I struggled to escape his arms for a moment, but he was still frozen in shock. "Let go," I begged, quietly.

"No," Will snarled, breaking out of his shock. He turned me around and pulled me back, capturing my lips with his. He kissed me fiercely, rendering any thoughts I'd had a moment ago completely useless. His kiss was passionate and powerful, pinning me down with the weight of it. He turned with me in his arms and pushed my back into the wall, moving with a speed I couldn't comprehend in my current position. Will wrapped one arm around my shoulders and one around my waist, pinning my arms to my sides and my body between him and the wall. He pulled away for air for a moment, leaving me gasping with shock, fear, and sadness. He claimed my lips again, moving the arm from my shoulders to grasp the back of my head, holding me to him absolutely. I squirmed and managed to free my left arm, using it to push against his chest with what strength I had left after this onslaught. He released my waist and placed his hand over mine, over the place where his heart was thudding quietly. Finally, Will pulled back to stare into my eyes, his burning with their intensity, as I tried to make sense of what had just happened. He leaned in to brush his lips against mine once more, gently, in a warm caress.

"Why?" I whispered. "You- I- everything- just…" I stammered, halfway between crying again and running for the trees.

"You'll never understand how much I've wanted that, how long I've waited." I twisted my head from his grasp, my lips trembling in revulsion and regret tinged with an odd feeling… Was I feeling…wistful? I couldn't understand the sense of melancholy that came over me as I tried to refuse Will's advance. I wanted him to leave me be, and yet I wanted him to take me back into his arms.

"Please… let me go." I sighed, hoping he'd hear the double-edge to my words. His eyes hardened, and he let go of me, stepping back. The wind blew between us, raising goose bumps on my exposed skin.

"The library closes soon," Will declared in a voice colder than the wind. "We can get in the back when they all leave." He melted into the darkness under the trees, leaving me alone with my shame.

"I'm sorry…" I whispered to him, far too quiet for him to actually hear. "What have I done to you?"