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Takeshi Yamato: Chapter 5. WARNING: Turian beatdown in progress.
Ron the True Fan: (Sings 'rape' to the cancan)
Takeshi Yamato: Time to humble (and possibly humiliate) the Turian race.
Palaven Orbit
"Pontifex destroyed!"
That was the THIRD dreadnought they'd lost. 3 dreadnoughts, 84 cruisers and 256 frigates had been destroyed. And they'd LONG since stopped counting the amount of fighters lost.
These 'Mobile Suits' were proving to be quite dangerous. Especially that one with the giant cannon and sword, and the one with the double scythe that seemed to disappear and reappear at will. What comm chatter they were able to pick up from it seemed to have the pilot refer to himself as 'Shinigami', whatever that meant.
"We need to get out of Palaven orbit! We're fighting with our backs to the sea here!"
"If we move, General, they'll have direct firing lines at Palaven!"
"If we don't move, there won't be a Palaven LEFT!"
The large dreadnought turned, firing at the General Revil, but the shots never connected. Then a massive beam of energy impacted the dreadnought fired by the Nahel Argama. "Oh, crap."
A dreadnought dove towards Menae, impacting the ground and exploding. "Who's your fucking daddy?!"
Ayame fired her beam magnum at another dreadnought, causing the drive unit to explode.
"We win, assholes! Shirou, how you doing?"
"Shinigami-sama no otori da!" Shirou yelled as his scythe tore through the hull of a cruiser, hitting something vital on the way through if the explosion was any indication. "Doing fine, Ayame!"
Ayame pulled out her anti-ship sword. The fighters practically spun around and fled. That would not save them.
The MS was faster. The upgraded thrusters allowed her to catch up and hack each fighter apart. Melee had its' uses. "Come on, kids! Let's have some fun!"
The scene was being repeated across the fleet. Mobile Suits were just proving faster and more maneuverable than fighters, and their Minovsky tech was providing an EMP effect to the unshielded Turian vessels.
They were losing. And it was GLORIOUS.
"We had to use heavily shielded military equipment to get this imagery to you! The human forces are slaughtering our fleets!"
On the surface of Palaven, many families were watching on vid-screens as the battle in orbit progressed.
Among those watching was a young Turian by the name of Garrus Vakarian.
The sight was fascinating to the young turian as he watched from his home. The mighty Turian navy, brought low.
By giant robots.
Let's be honest, readers, no matter the species, no matter the universe, EVERY kid loves giant robots.
"I want one of those…" he breathed as the one with the scythe sliced a frigate in two.
His parents stared at him. Their people were under threat. And he wanted one of the robots that was kicking their asses.
Actually, they could understand that.
Giant robots. EVERYONE wants giant robots. Giant robots are fucking AWESOME.
Especially giant robots that could kick ass like that.
It was just scary being on the other end of the ass-kicking.
Well, for the adults, that is. Young Garrus seemed not to care about that part.
Giant robots. Enough said.
Monty Python and the holy Grail had a famous line.
The Turians were unknowingly quoting it.
"RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!" The Turians are not cowards. They were brave, steadfast and VERY skilled at war.
THIS was beyond them. They were getting slaughtered by the unknown enemy and their military conditioning was being thrown out the window by the natural urge to RUN THE FUCK AWAY.
Not that it helped them much. It just gave the humans easier targets to shoot at.
Palaven was now fully blockaded, their shipyards were being abandoned and the humans were basically fucking them in the ass.
"General, the blockade is complete. All Turian units are cut off from the mass relay. Palaven is cut off."
"Thank you, Roland. I'd give you a promotion if it were possible."
Roland nodded. "Thank you, sir," he said. They both turned to survey the carnage as the Argama's Mega Particle Cannon decimated another cruiser. "Not much longer, huh?"
"We'll have full control of the Palaven Sphere in 96 hours. The Turians are bottled up on their homeworld and with the losses they're taking, any resistance will crumble."
"We're not a conquering army. We're here to humiliate and humble. As loathe as I am to say it… we need the Turians to fight the Reapers."
"Agreed," Williams said. "Here's hoping that, when all is said and done, they're willing to listen…"
Ron the True Fan: Whoops. Did we introduce the Turians to 100% concentrated undistilled rape?
Takeshi Yamato: Yup. Almost done - just the epilogue to go, and then we'll have finished with this fic.
Later arcs in the storyline will be in separate fics.
Ron the True Fan: With more rape! Let's face it, Gundam vs ME, Gundam wins EVERY TIME.
Ja Ne!
