Church bells rang out joyously, announcing to the world the union of the happy couple. Surrounded by cheering friends and family, Mamoru Chiba and Usagi Tsukino walked under a shower of rice and rose petals.
Mamoru gazed at his new bride, his love for her etched into every feature. She had never looked more beautiful than in this moment.
Usagi blushed under the intensity of his gaze and ducked her head demurely. "We're finally married, aren't we?" she said with wonder, as if she still couldn't believe it was true.
"I'll never let you go," Rei promised, reverently brushing Usagi's cheek.
"Rei-chan," Usagi whispered. Her eyes slipped closed, and she leaned forward.
"Usako," responded Mamoru, closing the remaining distance.
In the instant before their lips met, the world exploded. Usagi was ripped, screaming, from Rei's arms. Rei cried out in terror and helplessly reached for Usagi. She felt her heart seize as ice water was injected into her veins.
"Mamoru Chiba," a male's voice said, echoing from everywhere and nowhere.
Mamoru whirled around, seeing nothing in the void but devastation. "Who are you?!" he bellowed, equal parts demanding and pleading.
"You must not get close to Usagi Tsukino," a woman's voice continued, frustratingly calm and maddeningly familiar.
"Night after night you make me live this!" Rei yelled, desperate to fight but unable to find any enemies. "Why?!"
As if in answer, Usagi appeared again, tears welling in her eyes.
"When the two of you are bound together ..." the woman said.
"...the world will crumble," the man completed. "Usagi Tsukino – Princess Serenity ..."
Usagi changed, her wedding dress becoming one far more ancient and familiar. She looked at her love, and the worst part was how clearly, even now, she still had every faith that she would be saved.
"...will die."
The woman's voice, flat and emotionless, was in stark contrast to Rei's screams. The ground beneath Usagi began to shred apart. Vicious dagger-like shards flew into the air, effortlessly carving through flesh and bone until there was nothing left of Usagi but a few stained and tattered strips of white fabric.
"This is the truth from which you cannot escape."
... ... ...
Rei gasped and sat bolt upright.
Instinctively, her hand fled to her chest, fighting to ease the racing of her heart. She took one deep breath, and then another, struggling to calm herself and regain control. It took several minutes – several more than Rei would've liked, and there were a few moments where she genuinely thought she was having a heart attack. But eventually her pulse slowed, and she was able to think again.
She brushed back her sweat-soaked bangs and warily glanced at the sacred fire. Aside from the occasional pop of a log splitting, it was now silent; the flames that danced within revealed no more secrets.
That was okay. The ones Rei had received were enough to give her nightmares for weeks.
.
.
The next morning, Rei was once again at Mamoru's doorstep. It was likely much earlier than was considered polite, but Rei hadn't been able to get any sleep, and she had a feeling she wasn't alone in that.
The fire had been reluctant to tell what it knew, but Rei was relentless. Every night found her kneeling before the flames, deep in meditation and seeking answers. There she would stay, near motionless for hours, until fatigue would finally overtake her and she was forced to abandon her search for a time. A few hours sleep, then school, and then back to the flames as soon as possible. Concerned, the others had tried to convince her to stop; Minako in particular had created an elaborate and rather gruesome story of Rei falling asleep in her trance and tumbling face-first into the flames. But Rei knew the fire had something to tell her if only she listened hard enough, and her persistence had paid off.
What to do with this information, though, now she had it? She wasn't entirely sure, but when her feet led her toward Mamoru's apartment, she didn't argue with them.
Only a few days had passed since she was last here, but so much had changed. She knocked quietly this time, for starters, and had no plans to burn the door down.
She WOULD, and without hesitation, if he decided to be difficult. But she wasn't going there with the expectation of ... oh okay, GLEE at the mere THOUGHT of burning the door down.
Rei congratulated herself on growing as person.
It was only a few moments before the door opened, confirming Rei's suspicions that Mamoru wasn't sleeping either. He blinked in surprise at seeing her. "If you're here to hit me, could you do it on the other side? I like symmetry."
Her hands came up in a supplicating gesture. "No hitting. Can we talk?" She thought at first he would shut the door on her, but instead he pulled it wide and stood to the side, allowing her entrance.
Rei nodded her thanks and stepped inside. Mamoru closed the door behind her, and a thick tension soon settled over them.
"Can I get you a drink?" Mamoru asked, conditioned manners kicking in.
"No. Thanks."
That brief exchange done, the silence reclaimed them. Rei worked her jaw, considering her words carefully. Mamoru watched her with a guarded expression, waiting for her to begin; this wasn't a conversation he exactly wanted to be having, and he was in no rush to get it started.
Finally, Rei turned to Mamoru, locking onto his gaze, holding it. "I know about the dream."
His shock was so deep he reacted physically. Makoto's surprise punch just days earlier was like a preordained historical fact compared to having his most guarded, precious secret thrust out there as if she'd just told him his hair was black or it was Thursday.
"That's why, isn't it?" Rei pressed. She wasn't simply looking at him, she was looking THROUGH him. "You keep pushing Usagi away because of the dream."
Mamoru gulped down air like he'd just run a footrace. "How do you...?"
"I saw it too." She frowned, that explanation insufficient. "I saw yours, anyway. In the flames. It's kind of hard to explain." Again scrutinizing him. "I'm right, aren't I?"
It was a question, but came out more like a statement. Mamoru looked at first like he was going to deny it then saw no point. "Yes."
Normally Rei celebrated being right. Even though it happened pretty much constantly, she still got a thrill out of proving her rightness to others. But not this time. This time she just felt ill. "How long have you been having it?" she asked gently.
"Every night," he said, "or near about."
"Gods, Mamoru ..." Rei was stricken, and she looked at him with bottomless sympathy. She'd experienced his dream only once and knew it would still be haunting her for weeks to come.
Mamoru ran a hand through his hair and let out a shaky breath. "So now you know. I can't be with ... her. There's nothing for us but death."
To his surprise, Rei angrily shook her head. "No, I don't believe that!"
"How could you not? You said you saw the dream."
"I did! But that's all this is!" She waved her hands as though to encompass absolutely everything in her definition of 'this'. "It's not a guarantee of anything, it's just a dream!"
His expression melted into one of pure disbelief. "How can you say that?" Disbelief, and accusation; the tone sucked away any of Rei's momentum. "How can YOU, of all people say that?"
"I ..."
"How many dreams have you had, Rei?" Mamoru demanded. "How many feelings, visions and premonitions? How many have come true?"
Too many. Rei could only hang her head.
"I may not be at your level, but I've had a vision or two myself and I know what they feel like when they're real." He paused and regarded her gravely. "This is real."
Unwilling to yield so easily, Rei tried again to make Mamoru see reason. "She deserves to know! Whatever might or might not happen, Usagi should get the chance to make her own decision!"
"And if being with you would kill her, you'd give her that chance?"
Rei opened her mouth to agree, absolutely, to loudly and definitively state that she would do just that, beyond any shadow of a doubt. Only she couldn't quite make the words come. Mamoru saw all this and gave her a sad smile.
"You've had a vision," he said quietly, painting her a picture, "a true vision. You see her next to you. A light so bright you can barely stand to look at her. You know you don't deserve to have her there but you know she'll never leave you, and you're so grateful, so privileged, just to be able to feel that warmth and hope and love touch you. Then you watch, helpless as she's ripped away from you. Destroyed in front of you. That light, extinguished forever in a heartbeat. Because of YOU. Because you were TOO SELFISH TO WALK AWAY."
Tears streamed down Rei's cheeks. Mamoru didn't seem to notice his.
"So tell me, Rei," he challenged. "Tell me how you'd do it differently. Look me in the eye and tell me that if keeping her away from you and making her hate you would save her life, that you wouldn't do exactly that."
She wanted to. She wanted to so badly. She couldn't.
Mamoru had won, but he took no pleasure in it. Again he gave Rei a sad, compassionate smile. "Now, you understand."
Nothing in the situation had changed, but Mamoru appeared better for having shared his burden. His posture was a little less rigid, his eyes a little less weary. He had some measure of understanding, and maybe that was something, at least.
"That doesn't make it right," said Rei, slowly shaking her head. There would be no changing his mind, but it needed saying anyway. "She should be able to hear the reason why."
"We both know she loves us too much to ever accept it."
She had no answer to that. It was a rare thing, but Rei had run out of words. She turned and walked toward the door.
"Will you tell her?" Mamoru asked.
Rei turned back to face him. Again, his expression was unreadable
"I'll tell the others. But Usagi? Where to even start?" She shook her head, becoming angry again, though this time directing it inward. "All this and STILL we can't do a damn thing to help."
"You're helping her," Mamoru said without hesitation, "believe me. And ... you're helping me, too."
It didn't quite reach her eyes, but Rei smiled a little at that. It quickly fell away however, and renewed determination took over. "I have to believe there's another answer. We're not going to stop looking."
Mamoru stood up straight and, inclining his head, tipped a non-existent hat in her direction. "No matter what kind of hardships stand in our way, we must overcome them and keep going."
This time her smile was genuine. "You know you're kind of a dork when you do that," Rei told him.
Mamoru returned her smile. "I know."
