Chapter 6:

It had only been a day, but my life had been turned into a living hell.

Alice had decided to make Stella her own personal Barbie (since I no longer needed her assistance) and both of them loved every minute of it. They'd already maxed out two of my Visa and "Emergency Only" American Express. Alice, when asked for a reason, went into the inner workings of fashion and how out of date Stella's wardrobe was. Stella just said "They were all too cute to not buy." Then giggled and smiled angelically.

Needless to say, they received two more Visas before the night was over.

Emmett and Aanjay had bonded over their love of committing ingenious pranks. Emmett covered the wood stairs with wood cleaner while Aanjay "accidentally" stumbled upon Jasper's stash of Civil War books and pretended to burn them. Jasper, predictably, began to race up the stairs to stop her, only to slip down them seconds later.

Three times.

Of course, Jasper swore revenge against those two, and the trio spent the rest of the day getting back at each other.

Then Carlisle decided to try and recreate the eating pills without using my recipe. His scientific nature wanted to discover it himself. So he parked himself in the basement with an advanced chemistry set he'd ordered express that day. You could hear the occasional boom and smoke sometimes escaped from the basement door. Good thing he didn't have to breathe.

Esme was having an online conference in the family room with some up-and-coming home decorating designers. Four faces were plastered on the plasma screen TV and argued continuously. It only intensified when Alice came through the door (this was before the credit card debacle) and joined in.

Oh, happy day.

Then Rosalie ruled it was her job to educate Stella on the finer workings of men. I burst in there just as Rosalie was getting to "the talk." Thank god. Although pissed, she ascertained that Stella had learned enough for one evening, and went off to find Emmett and put those "teachings" to work.

And this was all before I got to work.

Edward was the only one who seemed helpful (no, he does not get any brownie points for not being a nuisance). He called me to give periodic updates on how Stella was doing, how damaged my house was, and to not worry. Of course, when you know your apartment is under attack from seven vampires, you tend to worry anyway.

Then the director dropped a nuclear warhead (bomb seemed too boring) on me.

"Hello, Bella." I nodded my greeting. "Did you get my memo yet?"

Memo? "Uh, no I didn't, Stan." I was only half paying attention, still preoccupied with my house and ex-vampire family.

"They've moved the Grand Opening to tomorrow night."

Mother fucking shitbags who can't keep their mother fucking shit straight-

"No problem, Stan. Thanks for the update." I smiled coldly, while inside I was screaming in agony. It originally was going to be next week, when the Cullens would be gone, but now…

I knew that at least Alice would insist on coming.

"Y-your w-w-welcome." Stan scrambled off, probably feeling the hostile vibes I was giving off.

Oh, happy day.

I parked my car in the driveway and took a deep breath, praying to the Lord above that the crazies living inside my house would be completely opposed to going to my museum's grand opening. I not only needed to impress some of New York's wealthiest (guys would be easy, girls not so much) but the people who held our funding as well. Especially one person.

I was walking up to the door, immediately picking the suite key out of the twenty hanging on the ring, when I noticed a curtain swish. I continued walking, although more cautiously, and slowly unlocked and cracked the door. The lights were off. The foyer and kitchen were empty as was the family room. I hung my expensive white fox fur (fake of course, but it cost as much as real) trench coat up and continued into the connecting hallway.

I was dressed in black pencil skirt and white frilled top, with black peep toe heels. I always used this outfit when writing reports ( as I did today) because it was a signal to most people on the premises to leave me the fuck alone. Yay, subtle messages.

The hallway was also quiet and I tiptoed up the stairs to the loft, hoping against hope that Stella was asleep and the Cullens had hit the road.

I cracked open her bedroom door, relieved when I saw Stella's tiny frame covered by the blanket, her chest rising up and down peacefully. Smiling, I closed the door softly.

Only to be splattered from head to toe with freshly made mud. I could tell you it was fresh because I could feel dry dirt on my skin as well as mud-sand. I was glad I didn't get any in my eyes, because I would not know how to explain how it didn't bother me if Stella or Aanjay asked.

Not that I'd have to worry about the latter.

Jay stood in front of me, electricity powered water gun in hand (you could load anything into it too, like mud, and it'd work as well), her eyes as wide as saucers. Emmett stood next to her, wearing an equally horrified expression.

As well they should.

The steady drip of mud onto the wood paneling was the only sound that could be heard before I broke the silence.

"Aanjay." I said in my best I'm-really-pissed-at-you-but-I'm-going-to-make-it-seem-like-I'm-not voice. "What are you doing carrying a mud-loaded squirt gun in my suite?"

Her normally steely voice shook as she explained. "We thought you were, Jasper, coming to avenge our latest prank, and were retaliating." The end came out like a question. Emmett only nodded his head to her words, his pupils as big as walnuts.

"Aanjay." I was now using my you-are-in-deep-shit voice. "You had better know how to run fast…because this was my favorite shirt."

She jumped down the stairs as I swiftly took them three at a time. I could hear Emmett following us as I chased my daughter through and out of the suite. I caught her in a headlock when she was halfway down the street. I didn't even have to use my vampire powers.

"You are lucky we have witnesses, or else I would be hanging you from the rafters you little turd." I whispered to myself. Jay was too busy struggling with my hands to hear me. Emmett was nervously defending her, worried about her punishment. Not that I'd be hurting her, of course, that accomplishes nothing.

I dragged her to the living room and to the marble side table, where all my silver objects were. I gave her a rag and a bottle of silver polish. There were at least two hundred objects in their, and some were so tiny you had to use a Q-tip to clean it.

"I want all of these done by tonight, or your not going to the Grand Opening. It's been changed to tomorrow, so I suggest you hurry. AND I'll be picking your dress." Her eyes had relaxed slightly at the silver polishing, but panicked again at the thought of someone other than herself picking her dress.

I half dragged, half pulled Emmett outside my door and quizzed him on the whereabouts of the other family members.

"Alice is at Tiffany's," he held up his pointer finger, "Jasper is probably still enjoying a burger at Burger King (TAKE THAT MCDONALD'S!)" middle finger, "Esme went shopping with two ladies from the talk this morning," ring finger, "Rosalie is visiting the mechanic's down the street," pinkie, "and Carlisle dragged Edward out somewhere to see if his homemade pills worked," and finally the thumb.

At least the house should be quiet for a few more hours.

"Did any of them say what time they would be getting home?"

Emmett smiled apologetically and said, "Uh…..right now?" A yellow 911 Porsche Turbo pulled up to the curb just as he said this, and the little pixie jumped out of the car, holding at least ten bags. I could see more piled into the back of her car.

"Bella! Oh my god! You have to see this!" I ignored her as a red BMW pulled up in front of her, and Rosalie jumped out.

"Bella! Since when do you have a Kawasaki Ninja motorcycle?"

Emmett and Alice whipped their heads towards me. "You have a WHAT?!"

Then Esme, Carlisle, and Edward, who apparently left together, showed up. Edward looked sick and Carlisle frustrated. Esme was beaming, though, and I suspected it had something to do with what was in her bag.

But the biggest surprise came when a black Mustang convertible rolled to a stop just behind my mailbox. The door opened to reveal a tan, muscled arm of a tan, muscular teenager that I was well acquainted with.

"Hey Bells. Seems you got a full house." he said, eyes hidden behind black aviators. The Cullen family stared, some in anger, some indifferently, at the stranger.

"Hey Seth." I greeted. Hope the bat brigade hadn't figured out a wolf was in their midst just yet.

Seth was my best friend, just behind Jacob. Jacob had gone off to a college in Washington, but Seth had gotten a scholarship to the New York Automotive and Diesel Institute (this place actually exists…weird name) and was living his dream. When Jake found out I was living close by to Seth, he made Seth promise to look out for me. Not that he needed any prompting. Seth visited about every two weeks to get updates. Aanjay had developed a major crush on the Quileute hottie.

Glad to know that some things still stayed the same.


I was writing this really late at night, and my mom was complaining, so I had to stop here. Hope you like it!