Chapter Seven
Learning to Trust
Mary awoke the next morning to the alarm clock ringing away underneath her pillow. Erik still lay with his head on her shoulder and his arm draped across her waist.
Her arm that was wrapped around his shoulder felt numb. She tried to wiggle her fingers. Pins and needles stabbed at her innocent digits.
Slowly and as quietly as she could Mary slipped out from under Erik. He grabbed at her in protest. Catching his flailing hand she laid it softly on the warm place where she had lain. A deep sigh was her reward.
Standing beside the bed she could not resist running her fingers through his hair. The strands were not quite brown nor could they be called blond. She recalled his luscious green eyes. Fire had sparked out of those green depths. They were a beautiful color even in anger.
Sighing she left the room to begin her day. Finding Antoinette she gave a report on the condition of their patient. They felt his recovery was all but assured.
Erik felt much better this morning but had no desire to let anyone know of his recovery. If they knew he would not have his angel of mercy taking care of him or giving him comfort. He'd be back to a solitary bed at night. Of course he knew this could not continue much longer or they would get suspicious.
He'd only pretend for a few more days then make a miraculous recovery. Until then he would enjoy himself immensely. He had never slept so peacefully in all his life. This line of thinking led to questions about how it would have been with Christine beside him. For once he did not continue down that road of pain and sorrow.
And so it went. Erik continued to play sick even when Antoinette and Mary declared him without fever or congestion. He claimed to have some sort of upset in his stomach, his head hurt, he could not possibly get out of bed and fend for himself.
Erik would not sleep until Mary came and sat on the edge of his bed. Maneuvering a woman into bed came easier with every night Mary came to watch over him.
He began to look forward to nighttime now. Before his bed was just another form of torture as his dreams had nightmarish qualities. Ideas of adding color were a source of occupation during the daylight hours, a means of killing time until bedtime.
The night Mary caught Erik gazing out his window humming at first made her angry but then some imp whispered in a very receptive ear if Erik were better a nurse was no longer needed, she was no longer needed. What harm could come from letting the farce go on for a short time? He seemed to want her company or certainly Antoinette would have had her ear burned from the fire of his anger. Antoinette remained unscathed.
For her part in this little deception Mary could say she did not mind giving an ill man a small bit of comfort. If that man happened to be devastatingly attractive and a danger to her religious convictions well so be it.
Mary hurried through her work every day so she could take a bath before heading upstairs for her shift with Erik. She had even taken to bringing a book along so she could read aloud to him even though he was asleep. He seemed to like to hear her voice so she read her book aloud. Taking in to account that the man pretended to still suffer some malady she was not at all sure he did not play opossum.
Erik felt to go beyond the third day would be foolish. Knowing Antoinette she'd be bringing in a doctor if he did not recover soon. He had been surprised she had not done so already.
Once Erik had declared himself well enough to return to his regular routine he only saw Mary if he made the effort to find her as she worked about the house. Sticking to his resolve to distance himself from the infernal woman proved harder with every passing day.
His original punishment of taking care of those nasty beasts in the coops had turned into a pleasant chore for the blasted woman. Not that Erik felt any real irritation. He just felt the need to keep some rancor between himself and Mary. He could easily slip into the habit of needing and wanting. He'd not fall into that trap again.
As he observed her over the next few weeks Erik thought perhaps they might form a friendship of sorts. He couldn't be overly friendly as the rest of the household might get suspicious. An enquiry into her health or something similarly mundane would not bring down Antoinette's investigative skills on his head. One suspicion of hers could lead to hours of irritating interrogation from her. She was now more vigilant than ever trying to keep Erik from slipping into the madness that had gripped him before.
Much to Erik's irritation Mary seemed to become timid when in his presence. He stood behind his mirrors and watched as she talked and laughed with the others with ease. They had shared a bed yet looking at him directly suddenly became nearly impossible.
Let him come within the same room she occupied and her tongue grew silent, she would not lift her eyes above his feet when he did manage to force some comment from her other than a simple yes or no answer.
He could not help but take notice that her hands shook whenever she stood before him. After the episodes in his room while he had been ill Erik thought she had at least lost her fear of him.
Had he been such an ogre that she still felt frightened when in his presence? Erik found himself acting quite uncharacteristically to win her trust. It shouldn't matter but it did.
Erik went out of his way to be extra kind to her. He even offered her the use of his own library instead of her having to trudge to town to the less than adequate library located there.
The sparkle in her eyes had been worth losing the privacy of his library. Now Erik had a legitimate excuse to be in the same room as Mary without Antoinette or anyone else becoming suspicious of his motives.
He could sit in a chair across from Mary as they both read. If his eyes drifted more often to her than the pages of his book who was to know other than him?
The evening Lizzy and Brielle decided to take advantage of the masters offer to use his library Erik wished he could shuck the two chattering females out. They whispered as they cast glances in his direction. He had to restrain the urge to squirm in his chair. Blast them.
Regret began to seep in for his house of impropriety. It was unheard of for a man of certain wealth to share more than a cursory interest in his staff. To open a private room to them was quite shocking. To further shock the curious neighbors they heard he was in the room along with them. Three single attractive women. They whispered that perhaps more than reading took place behind the closed door of the library.
The poor man needed some comfort of a carnal nature. With his affliction it would be hard to use the usual method for procuring such service or approaching a woman to court at all. Who could blame him for taking advantage of the loose morals of servants?
Some of the local women who had seen Erik on the rare occasions Antoinette had steamrolled him into going into town had not been adverse to an admiring glance or two.
The rough natured men of the fields did not make for a romantic figure. Some of them looked worse than a pig wallowing in a stye. His face could look downright horrid and by the looks of the rest of him he'd still come out on top. That would set the more bold ones to cackling about not minding him on top.
Jacob came home sporting a black eye and an even darker mood one night after spending time in the village pub. Several hints of inappropriate behavior between his employer and the women under his roof had set Jacob off.
He had not only gotten the black eye but also an apology from the offenders. His warning of one word being touted around about the nonsense of Mr. Erik and any inappropriate behavior would earn the tale bearer more of the same he had given the three men who bore the evidence of his anger.
Jacob was quite an agile and accomplished amateur boxer. His warning they would heed. Besides, another shocking scandal was sure to crop up within the week. Small communities thrived on gossip.
Erik did not directly thank Jacob for defending his honor. He instructed Antoinette to give Jacob a couple of days off with pay. He also had her slip an extra pound into his pay envelope. It was easier for Erik to express his gratitude in this way. He was not good with people even though he had been making an effort.
As he had expected Antoinette had taken notice of his interest in Mary. He had at first protested blustering and shouting at her trying to deflect her attention away from her original query.
Antoinette had not been fooled by his tactics or swayed by his tirade. Unless he raged with fire in his eyes she knew he was only letting off steam without any real malice intended.
She continued to let him rant on and on without a word leaving her mouth. Erik stopped his stalking around the room to face his adversary. Knowing she would stand there until grass began to grow under her feet Erik at last admitted to having some interest in Mary.
He could not say what it was other than she soothed the restlessness inside him. He need only be in her presence to feel her calming effect. Erik was of the opinion that it had something to do with her religious practices. There is not greater fool than the fool who will not see what is right in front of him.
Antoinette did not for one moment believe Erik only had a casual interest in Mary. He stalked the girl throughout the day. Not in a menacing or controlling way as he had Christine but more as a man would if he cared for a woman. She would bet her last shilling Erik watched her from behind his mirrors and listened to her conversations from behind the walls.
Erik could read the disbelief in her eyes. Damn it, was it not her suggestion he try to fit in? Had she not hounded him to seek out the company of a woman?
She better than anyone knew he could not very well do things in the accepted way. Besides, his interest in Mary was only as a companion, someone he could have an intelligent discussion with.
This in no way resembled what he had felt for Christine. His only interest in Mary was as he had stated to Antoinette, purely a woman of interest who he might strike up a friendship with if she would allow such as him to be called a friend. Romantic yearnings would not raise their ugly head. Erik truly believed for the most part what he told Antoinette. If he told only a partial truth he dismissed his lapse.
He would not let himself lose control as he had with Christine. This was not the opera house and Mary did not sing. There was no Raoul de Chagny lurking in the background wooing her with his sweet words and handsome face. Of course who was to say that Mary did not have some man in her past? They could be wrong in assuming she had been headed for a life of dedication to the church and God. That thought gave him indigestion.
Knowing Antoinette would be watching him like a bird of prey now that her suspicions had some merit, Erik did not follow Mary quite as often as he had before. He kept their encounters to a minimum. He felt damn lonely after having had her companionship every evening. Erik stalked about muttering phrases such as "damn nosy woman" "nose like a bloodhound" and "a man cannot even enjoy his own home without some busybody prying into his personal affairs".
Antoinette merely smiled when she passed him in the hallway or outside in the garden. He would mumble just loud enough for her to hear then cast her a dark look all of which she ignored. It would do Erik good to have to actively pursue a woman in the normal way.
Antoinette knew he wouldn't be able to forgo Mary's company for much longer. She did not care for the sad droop to Mary's mouth at all. The sad look in her eyes was no better. Perhaps she would prod them a little. Erik was not after all a normal male. He knew almost nothing about wooing a woman. He could barely speak with one unless from behind a wall or mirror.
One way or another Antoinette would bring those two together either as simply friends or something deeper. She'd let them work out the intricacies once she had them headed in the right direction. Had she known of the couples deception during Erik's illness some worry lines about her eyes could have been avoided.
