Author's Notes: This chapter is where my AO3 version and version of this story deviate. If you prefer to read a detailed description of Maryden and Cole's lovemaking, you can head over to Archive of Our Own for an uncut version. Otherwise, enjoy!


True to his word, Varric had me removed from the hospital and back in the Hanged Man before the days end. The surgeon protested, but a glare from Varric was enough to make her back down, although reluctantly.

I was still weak and in a lot of pain, but with help from Aveline – who was much stronger than I expected – they carried me back to the inn and to my own bed. It may very well be the first time I actually used the bed, and I found myself catching up on all the sleep I never needed.

Maryden doted on me. She read to me, changed my bandages, and spoon-fed me soup while my hand healed. I liked the soup, though not as much as the cheesy biscuit. Even after my hand healed, she kept feeding me. I thought about saying something, but I didn't. I liked having her there.

Days passed and the wound under my ribs finally closed up, but it still hurt. Maryden had some experience with treating injuries and sickness from the Conclave explosion, and I helped her where I could.

"We would have had you up and running already if there wasn't a potion shortage right now." Varric sighed in aggravation. He sat in a chair he stole from the Hanged Man's tavern area, so he could sit with me. "Makes me long for the days of Skyhold and being on a first name basis with the most powerful man there."

Maryden knelt next to me, cleaning my wound and applying an elfroot poultice. She let her hair down today, not in her usual braids, and her long tight curls cascaded around her shoulders like a moon-lit river. "Have you tried contacting the Inquisition and asking them to send healing supplies?"

"They've sent a few already. It's just hard to get ships in with our harbor still in ruins. They've even resorted to traveling by Cumberland and other port towns and then finishing the trip on land. I don't think I have to tell you that a trip like that takes fucking forever. Even if I have it expedited, chances are the kid will recover completely before it arrives."

Flustered, forlorn, and frustrated, Varric wanted to fix it, but failed.

"Hey, did I tell you two that I finally got my threatening letter from the Carta today. Said some shit about finishing the job with 'my friend' if I don't stop interfering."

Maryden gave me a worried look. "They can't be serious?"

"I'd let you read it, but I'm afraid I put it in my outgoing mail bin, and that shit's already been picked up." He put it in the fireplace and lit it. "Don't worry yourself, Diva. The Carta seems to have conveniently forgotten that their men are all dead, and my friend here is alive and recovering nicely. If they want me to give up, they need to seriously work on their blackmail."

I was glad to hear that.

"Still." Maryden coaxed me into sitting up, just enough for her to wrap a fresh bandage around my middle. "I'd prefer not to see Cole hurt like this again."

Varric raised an eyebrow. "You suggesting I stop going to the meetings?"

"No, of course not. I just..." Her eyes met mine again, and she sighed. She knew what was at stake, but she worried for me. I couldn't help but smile, reaching out to cup her cheek with my hand. The gesture was enough, and she leaned into my hand, placing her own over it.

"Ugh, seriously you two." Varric was both happy and annoyed to see Maryden and me this way. "Get a room."

"We're in a room." I find Varric strange sometimes.

"One I'm not in." He got up from his seat. "I suppose I can just arrange that myself. And speaking of arranging, Maryden reminded me of a project I've been working on, so I should go finish that up."

"Maker watch over you, Varric."

"Yeah. Ditto, Diva." He winked at me, before quickly exiting the room.

Maryden took my hand, removing it from her cheek but still holding it fondly. "I have a gift for you. One moment please."

She was excited now. She got up from my bed, crossing the room to pick up a box. I remembered her bringing it in when she came to my room, but I didn't know what was in it. She wanted it to be a surprise, so I didn't press.

The box was large and cylindrical, made of a light cedar wood and painted snow white. A fancy baby-blue bow was wrapped around the lid; purely for decoration. It did nothing to seal the box.

She set it gently down on my lap, then stepped back, looking at me expectantly. I picked the box up, turning it over in my hands. It was pretty and light-weight, like there was nothing inside. The wood was smooth and well crafted, cut from the forests of...

"You are supposed to open it, silly!"

I set it back down on my lap and lifted the lid to look inside. First thing I saw was a lot of white cloth. I don't think that was the gift, either.

Peeling back the cloth revealed...a hat!

It was bright red, with gold trim around the brim and band. It was decorated with royal-blue silk flowers. The brim was very wide, though not quite as wide as my favorite hat, and one side was flipped up in the Orlesian style. I'm pretty sure this was a ladies hat, too, but I didn't care.

"A traveling merchant came through the city the other day," she explained as she watched me turn the hat over in my hands. "I had him switch the flowers to blue so they'd match your Inquisition uniform."

"Wow," I exclaimed as I gazed at it. I placed the hat on my head. It fit comfortably, and the velvety inner lining felt good against my scalp. I couldn't see it once it was on my head though.

Maryden took care of that, reaching into her bag to pull out a hand-held, silver polished mirror, and she held it up for me.

"Thank you," I could see myself smiling. It occurred to me how rarely I've seen my face smile. I liked it. "Does it make me look handsome?"

She laughed. "Why yes! It makes you look quite dashing, Cole."

Dashing? I like dashing!

Maryden reached forward and gently took the hat from my head, despite my weak protest, and placed it back in the box. "Next time you must dress up, you'll be prepared."

I wanted to wear it now, but I guess it's more appropriate for parties than for a sick bed.

"I'm sorry," I said as I watched her close the lid. "I don't have a gift for you."

She placed the box on a small table in my room, right next to where my Inquisition uniform was neatly folded. "There is no need to give a gift today. Your gratitude is boon enough for me."

"But that's what romance books tell you to do. I give to you, and then you give to me."

This took her off guard. "You like romance novels?"

"Yes, is that wrong?"

"I..." She shook her head. "No, no, I just didn't expect that from you."

"Casandra used to read them to me. She loved 'Swords and Shields,' but she didn't know anyone else who read the book – besides Varric, who hated her at the time. She wanted to share her passion with someone, so I asked her to read them to me."

"Wait! The Divine reads 'Swords and Shields?'" She seemed surprised, and her cheeks flushed. I'm not sure why. "

"Yes."

"Oh Maker, now I'm picturing her Perfection reading the sappiest and most salacious book I've ever read." Her voice went soft in embarrassment. "And believe me, I've read a lot."

"Well, she wasn't the Divine at the time."

"And she read them to you?"

"Yes...except when the characters started taking their clothes off to have sex. She didn't want to read those parts to me."

"Well, that's...kind of a relief...I think." Her face was still warm, but not as much as before.

"Why? Is there something wrong with the sex in Varric's book?"

"No, not exactly..."

I wasn't sure why Cassandra didn't want to read the sex parts to me. It wasn't like I couldn't see the images in her head, whether she read them aloud to me or not. I knew what sex was, having seen plenty of mages sneaking off to dark corners at the White Spire while I was invisible. Or seeing men and women wander into various private rooms and alleyways to copulate. This was before Varric told that it was wrong to watch people in such private moments, whether they knew I was there or not.

Maryden took a long, deep breath. "Well, Varric said you didn't know much about love and romance, but I had no idea..."

"You talked to Varric about me?"

She looked at me, a slight smirk on her crimson lips. "More like he talked to me. He took me aside soon after he found out about us. It was nerve-racking, really, getting a lecture from an overprotective 'father'...with a crossbow."

"Varric wouldn't hurt you."

"He joked about it, but I got the impression he was more concerned about me being hurt by you. I'm not sure why." She must have seen my countenance change, as hers did, too. She didn't know what he meant, but I did. "Cole? Is something wrong?"

"Maryden, there is something you should know about me."

She met my eyes, turning her body to face me fully. She wasn't surprised I had a confession, and waited patiently for me to speak. But how do I tell her? Varric visited me often, but we didn't talk about my secret again. Is this the right time? Should I do it now?

I reached my hands out, cupping her face in them so I could look her directly in the eye. I can focus, fixate, figure out a person better when I can see their eyes. And the view was nice.

I dipped into her thoughts, felt for the fear of the Fade. Much of it was the natural fear of demons that the Chantry taught her her entire life, but there was more. Tavern walls rattle. Green light spills in. Monsters everywhere. Blood! Death! Must flee!

Don't go!

Don't die!

"Cole?"

She pulled me out of her thoughts, looking at me in concern. I knew in that moment I couldn't tell her. If I told her, she'd...

I leaned forward and kissed her instead. It was an eager and desperate kiss. I was afraid of hurting her, losing her, and the kiss gave me reassurance.

She returned my kiss with equal fervor, but not like mine; not born of desperation or fear. It was something else entirely. Whatever it was, it felt good, much better than the kiss I started. She slipped one arm around my bare back, and I started a little when her touch tickled, but it did nothing to lesson the kiss.

The real surprise came when she pressed her tongue against my lips, urging me to open them. I did so, obediently, just like before. This time, however, her tongue didn't stay in her own mouth like it is supposed to.

It surprised me enough that I pulled away, looking at her in shock. "What was that?"

She stared, stunned, before blushing, lowering her eyes in shame. "Sorry, I guess I got carried away."

My hands were still on her face, and I stared at the eyes that no longer stared at me. I admired the soft, subtle freckles on her face, the emphasized blush in her cheeks, a face as handsome as it was beautiful.

"All this talk of salacious novels just got me..." I sensed her embarrassment; an overstep in her mind. She thought she had done something wrong, but that wasn't true. I wasn't expecting the intrusion, but I...I think I liked it!

I pulled her towards me again, kissing her with the same passion she had shown me. This time, I decided to try that tongue...thing she did. She welcomed me, pressing her own against mine.

This kiss was even better than our first. I could feel it from my mouth to my chest to my groin, a symphony of sensation and sensuality. She shifted her body closer to me, her calloused fingers stroking my back. I felt my own body growing warm, maybe even hot, but a pleasant kind of hot.

She slid her hand to my chest, bringing her body closer to me still. I found myself being pushed back till I was lying on the bed again. She never relinquished her hold on me, following me down so she lay partially on top of me.

She broke the kiss abruptly, her breath labored as she looked down at me. I was breathing hard, too; the way I sometimes do after a long fight or run. I wasn't sure why she stopped kissing me, and I was tempted to pull her back in again.

"Are you..." She swallowed, letting out a lustful laugh before continuing. "Should we? Should we do this with you...still hurt?"

It took me a moment to realize what she meant. The elfroot had taken effect and I felt no pain in my side, so I had completely forgotten about it. I also didn't want to think about it right now. She was giving me something much better to think about.

"If we step carefully, I will be fine." I reassured her, pulling her back towards me. She was all too willing, and her mouth was on mine once more, as passionate as it was before. And this tongue-thing is fun.

It didn't stop with the kiss, as her hands explored where no other hands had before. Part of me was fearful of what she was doing. The other, stronger part of me didn't care, just so long as she kept doing it.

And she did.


I never felt more human than I did at that moment...with her. We lay stripped, sweaty, sated, our bodies still intertwined in a loving embrace. Our breathing heavy and labored, but we were both happy.

"So Varric lied. You are experienced." she managed to say once she'd caught her breath.

"He did not lie. This was my first time."

A small part of her wanted to be mad at me, but that was impossible in her current state. "I'm not a fool. You do not master love and carnal knowledge on your first attempt."

I chuckled, and leaned down to kiss her again, but she stopped me this time with a hand to my mouth and a giggle. "Oh, no! Your machinations end right now. What are you hiding, Cole? I will find out."

She was still giddy, but my own mood fell. I was back to questioning myself again. Should I tell her? This might be the best time to do so, with her in such a joyous state. Or the worst time. I wasn't sure. I suppose I don't have to tell her I used to be a demon. Was it enough to tell her I could read her mind? Would she be okay with just that much disclosure?

"I...um..." I took a deep breath. I've always struggled to put words together in a way that others understand, and having the stakes so high now didn't make it easier. She deserved to know, one way or another.

Telling her would have to wait, though, as something foreign touched the back of my mind. I tried to ignore it, to go back to engrossing in her, but it pushed at me, becoming more and more urgent. It felt similar to someone needing help, but strange.

I reluctantly lifted my eyes from her to survey the room, and my calm was shattered in an instant. I sat up on the bed, startling Maryden as I did so. She let out a cry of surprise and protest, but she was no longer my focus. We were no longer alone. Someone was in the room with us; staring at us with sightless glowing eyes.

Duty?