Chapter 7 – Time Really Moves Fast

Stephen purposely tapped the pen in his hand against his thigh, staring down at the blank piece of paper resting against one of the planes magazines. This should have been easier than it was; thinking of what to say about his father. The plane was near enough silent, travellers resting through the long flight. Turning to his right his gaze settled on Izzy, too anxious to sleep she was flicking through a magazine. She must have felt him looking at her; she pulled her head up, pushing a few strands of hair behind her ear as she did. As soon as she turned to him she opened her mouth to speak. Frowning slightly and narrowing his eyes, Stephen knew the words that were going to come from her lips. 'You okay?' Or 'how you holding up?' he was sick of it.

Izzy snapped her mouth shut, the stare Stephen gave her was unnerving. Closing the magazine in her lap she placed it on the empty seat next to her. She stood up and didn't glance back at her husband; she quickly made her way up the aisle to the bathroom.

Stephen sighed as he watched her walk away from him. His stomach turned, unsure of the feeling taking over him. For the past 24 hours he had pushed all of his feelings and thoughts to the back of his mind. If he sat thinking for too long, he felt himself beginning to break. Izzy had told him 'it's okay to remember'. He hadn't started that process yet, when his thoughts did float back to his father. The moments they shared together; growing up to returning home, successful and capturing his dream, he felt himself choke up.

Izzy sitting back down next to him stopped him running away with his thoughts. She didn't look at him; instead she pulled her iPod from her handbag. She had pulled her hair into a ponytail, the tiredness in her eyes even more evident; they had both been having trouble sleeping. Before she slipped in her headphones she stood up, reaching into the overhead compartment. He reached out for her, his big hand coming to rest on her hip.

"What yeh doing?"

"I'm cold. I thought I put a jacket in my holdall." He watched as she rummaged around a little bit more. "Apparently not."

"Have mine." He leant forward pulling his black fleece sweatshirt over his head, holding it out to her as she sat back down. A small smile graced her lips, and gently she took the sweatshirt from his grip.

"Thanks, you sure you won't be cold?"

"Ah'm used to the cold, lass." Stephen settled back into his seat, trying to stretch his legs out.

Pulling the sweatshirt over her head, the warmth of it seeped into her skin even though it engulfed her. Pressing her nose gently against the soft material, the familiar scent of Stephens cologne surrounded her. It was the closest thing she would get to affection from Stephen as things were going.

The balance of needing Stephen and being strong on her own was harder to find than Izzy first thought. Finding the in-between was starting to seem impossible. She hugged herself, forgetting about the iPod lying next to her.

"Yeh want to try and get some sleep?" Izzy turned to him. She knew that look and she couldn't stop the smile that crept onto her face. His big arm wrapped around her shoulder and brought her flush against his body. He kissed the top of her head and her uneasiness settled a little bit. For a while everything would seem normal.


The taxi ride from the airport was quiet, small talk being made between the driver and Stephen as Izzy watched everything pass by. It was early morning, the sky was grey and rain was threatening to fall. The cab pulled up to the house and Stephen paid him before he helped them with their cases. The front door opened and Izzy caught sight of Margret in the corner of her eye. She could only watch on as Stephen hugged his mother once they were reunited; as soon as Margret had seen him she burst into tears. Her heart ached and she didn't think she had the strength to get through this. After a few moments they started speaking in Gaelic between each other and Izzy felt a sting of resentment but quickly pushed it aside. She had always been welcomed in the family, more so than Stephen had been in hers, she had no right to feel pushed out. Standing back from what unfolded before her, Izzy let them find comfort in each other's embrace. Stephen needed to be surrounded by his family and they needed him. Once inside, Margret disappeared. She was answering the flurry of phone calls from people wanting to offer their condolences.

"She looks so tired." Stephen spoke, running a hand over his face with a frustrated sigh. He shook his head and carried their case upstairs to the bedroom without sparing a second glance at Izzy. Deciding to following him, Izzy crept up the stairs. She winced as she heard the cases hit the floor with a heavy thud.

"Ste, we're here to help her now." Izzy leant against the doorframe watching Stephen pace the room at a frantic pace.

"I should have been here." Stephen slammed his fist on the dresser table, frustration and anger running thick through his veins. "Me dad must be looking down on me, thinking what a failure his son is. Ah knew he wanted me to stay in Ireland."

Izzy didn't know which path to take. The usually placid man was now oozing pent up anger. Everything inside of her wanted to slap him, shake him, do something to get him to return to the man she knew. "Ste." She spoke softly, carefully approaching him. He sat down on the edge of the bed, running his hands over his face. "Your dad was so proud of you."

"Izzy, just stop." Stephen sighed, burying his head further into his hands.

"No!" His head shot up, eyes wide at the tone of her voice. He rarely heard her raise her voice, especially to him. "Your dad wouldn't want to see you like this. This isn't you. Yes, you lived away from your family for 4 years but they all supported you, wanted you to follow your dream. They don't hold it against you and neither did your dad."

"You don't know-"

"Don't I? Me and your dad had a long chat before the wedding." Izzy pulled one of his large hands into her own. "He didn't stop going on about how proud he was of you. How he told anyone and everyone he could what a good, successful man his son had become." Stephen finally tore his gaze from the floor, meeting Izzy's soft eyes. "You did exactly what he wanted you to do, and that was to follow your dreams."

"Iz.." Stephen started but couldn't continue. Izzy could hear his voice breaking though he tried to remain in control.

"You're a wonderful son, the best husband I could ever have wished for and one day soon you will be the most amazing father." Stephen swallowed hard, biting his lip trying to fight the sudden rush of emotion through his body. Days of holding everything in, trying to be strong for everyone around him had finally caught up. "Ste, you're allowed to cry. Let it out."

Jaw tense, fighting everything his body wanted to do, Stephen clenched his teeth together. The anger that had been swirling around his body suddenly disappeared, turned into a wash of grief. He didn't want to look Izzy in the eye, he didn't want her to see him like this again. "Ah just want to see him again."

Izzy sat down on the bed next to Stephen and he wrapped his arms around her. For once he was leaning on her. "I know, Ste." Hugging him as tight as she could, Izzy just had to be there for her husband. Watching him cry again was something she didn't expect to do.

A/N – Thank you moxxie23, MrsKiaFarrelly, peeps8705, hotpocketbandit, ThatGirl54, kelsi, MissShelz, celticfighter, wwemagpie, hOtlilmofo, mrsa87, DefinitelyProbablyMaybe (A review as long as 'The Rod'. I feel honoured) and DeansTrueGirl for the awesome reviews. I'm visiting Katie next week (DefinitelyProbablyMaybe), so it could be a while before I update. :) Lou x