I swear I didn't mean for this to take all week. I worked on it every day. I have the usual excuses. I was busy. Between work and going to the gym I feel like I haven't been home at all this week. So here's hoping that almost 4,000 words and the long-awaited smut makes up for this taking so damn long. As for getting back to reviews, there is something wrong with the site and I can't respond to reviews. I'm not sure what's going on. There are some of you who review on the regular and I definitely appreciate the feedback! There were also some new people, so thanks guys!
"I just want you."
Carol's head snapped up. Her eyes immediately locked on his. She watched for something—anything—that would give away that this was all just a cruel joke. Every time Ed had ever told her she was worthless and no other man would want her suddenly flashed through her mind. She had to get out of there before Daryl figured out that Ed was right.
She moved to pull away, but Daryl was faster and he tugged her toward him before she could take off. He could almost see the wheels turning in her head. She had convinced herself that there was no way he could want her. Though he often felt socially inept, even Daryl understood that feeling. The look that had settled on her face was one he'd worn more times than he'd like to remember. So when Carol moved to flee he did the one thing he'd never thought himself capable of and pulled her closer.
Despite the fear of rejection coursing through her, Carol responded immediately. Her arms wound around Daryl's waist, dropping the bundled bedroll to the catwalk. She didn't even hear the loud clang it made as it landed. Before she could hide her face in his chest, Daryl tipped her chin up toward him. That was all the invitation she needed. Carol stepped up on her tiptoes and kissed him. It was soft and gentle, barely a brush of her lips against his. A chaste kiss for all intents and purposes. Her hands settled at Daryl's waist and guided him gently toward the wall.
Daryl wound his fingers through her hair as she pushed him back against the wall. Carol attacked him now, but he was far from an unwilling participant. His tongue darted out and grazed against her lower lip seeking access. Carol pressed her body against his as she opened her mouth to allow him access. The taste of him nearly set her body on fire.
Just as Daryl had worked up the courage to let his hands wander Carol pulled away from him abruptly.
"This is not a free show. Are you ever going to learn to knock?" She nearly yelled at Glen. After what he'd interrupted this morning and the trouble it had caused she was just about ready to kill him.
"I…I just came to make sure everything was okay. There was a loud noise and then some other noises…" He trailed off as he spotted Carol's bedroll on the ground and he put two and two together.
Daryl was barely hanging on by a thread. He was nearly vibrating with rage and Carol could feel the tension rolling off of him in waves.
"Go." Carol directed with deadly calm. She watched as he backed up and nearly ran down the stairs.
Now she'd have to figure out what she was going to do with Daryl.
TWD
Daryl watched as Carol stood staring at the now empty stairwell. He was too terrified to do anything for fear that she'd be the next one to bolt down those stairs. She'd had time to think it over now. It would no longer be a rash decision made in the heat of the moment, but a carefully measured one. He knew he wasn't the man she needed him to be and he wondered if she'd figured that out now. He stood stock-still; every muscle in his body aching to reach out and touch her, to pull her into his arms and hold her.
TWD
Carol watched the now-empty stairwell for much longer than was necessary. She was too terrified to turn around for fear that Daryl would be the next one to bolt down those stairs. He'd had time to consider the situation. He'd had time to realize that all of those things that Ed had said about her were probably true. She wondered if he'd figured out that Ed had been right all along. She stood frozen in place; everything in her longed for him, for his touch.
TWD
Someone had to break this heartrending stalemate and Carol knew it was going to have to be her. She turned slowly to face him and panic nearly overcame her. He was still backed against the wall and surely turning on him would make him feel like a caged animal and immediately put him on the defensive. Better to just get it over with. She took a step back to give him space and that was what spurred him into action
He knew for sure that, that step backwards was clear intent to flee and he couldn't let her do it. It might just kill him if she walked away from him now. Now that he knew the taste of her and the feel of her body against his there was no giving that up. He was addicted. Before she could go any further Daryl's hand shot out to grab her wrist and pull her against him.
It was all Carol could do to squelch a surprised yelp. She landed with a thud against his chest and didn't know whether to be relieved or terrified.
"Stay." His voice was little more than a husky whisper. "Please."
Relief it was then.
Carol nodded against his chest. "I'd ask you to shoot Glen in the ass, but I don't want to have to help Hershel sew that up." She mumbled into his chest.
Daryl's arms tightened around her as he chuckled. "Think I might be a bad influence on ya if you're already wantin' me to shoot someone in the ass."
They stayed that way for a while before Daryl unwound her arms from around him and guided her back toward the cell. He handed her the bundle of stuff she'd dropped on the catwalk. Her heart sank a little as she realized that she's still be sleeping on the top bunk tonight. Alone.
"He's got a big mouth. He'll tell the others." She said quietly.
Daryl looked at her, confusion crossing his face.
"Glen," she clarified.
He didn't say anything and Carol sighed as she kicked off her boots and tossed her stuff onto the top bunk. She climbed up and settled in before she realized that Daryl was still leaning against the wall watching her. She shouldn't have said anything. If he hadn't wanted to run before he surely would now. If there was one thing Carol knew he hated it was gossip and being the center of attention. She rolled away to face the wall. If he was going to walk away she sure as hell wasn't going to watch him do it. He was so damn frustrating. So hot and cold.
Carol had gotten herself so worked up that she didn't even hear Daryl walk out. When she hadn't seen him or heard him shuffling around she assumed he'd left. He was so quiet she hadn't heard him return. He'd gone to the next cell to find blanket to drape over the door. Once he'd blocked out the nosy assholes they lived with, he kicked off his boots and climbed the ladder to the top bunk.
She nearly shot straight up when he started to climb up the bunk. Surely walkers couldn't climb. Could they? Finally her eyes adjusted to the pitch black a little better and she could make out Daryl's silhouette balancing at the edge unsure if he should climb up the rest of the way. When Carol didn't tell him to fuck off he took that as permission and crawled up the bunk to lie next to her.
Daryl was no good with words, or feelings, or any of this shit really. He didn't know what to say to calm her fears that Glen would tell the rest of the group. He didn't even really know if it was because she was ashamed of him or because she knew he didn't like that center-of-attention shit. He reached up to stroke her cheek, hoping desperately that if he couldn't tell her maybe he could show her that it was okay.
Carol wasn't sure what he was doing. He hadn't said anything since she'd warned him about Glen. When he'd left she was sure he'd taken off with no intention of returning. She'd been shocked when he'd climbed the rungs to her bunk. Now he was laying here next to her, gently stroking her face.
"You don't owe me anything, Daryl." She whispered. "You don't have to do any of this. We can just—"
Daryl cut her off with a soul-baring kiss. He poured everything he had into that kiss desperately hoping that he could show her what he felt because words were sure as hell failing him right now. He wanted this woman. He needed her. She'd saved him when he didn't even know he needed saving. She'd saved him from a lonely miserable existence. But most importantly, she'd saved him from himself.
Carol grabbed for his shirt, she balled the fabric up in her fists and held him to her. She was so tense that she wouldn't or couldn't open up to him. When he bit down gently on her lower lip she finally opened her mouth to him. Tongues battled and whirling nervous minds shut down. Eventually they gave in and let their bodies take over.
Rough, calloused hands made their way under Carol's tank top smoothing slowly over the soft skin he found there. She gasped as his fingers brushed against the swell of her breast. She turned her body to face him and Daryl's other arm curled around her waist to yank her closer. Her hand pressed against him and moved over his chest and down his stomach to the waistband of his jeans. He shuddered as she moved her hand further down to cup his very obvious erection. He bucked into her hand with a moan before he could stop himself.
The sharp movement of Daryl's hips caused the bunk to sway. Hands stopped their exploration to cling to one another. A low chuckle escaped Daryl, but Carol failed to see what was so funny.
"Fuck. Nothin' is gonna go right, is it?" He chuckled again. Then he was moving down her body and Carol nearly panicked at the loss. She watched as he moved slowly down her body, exposing skin and kissing her as he made his way to the end of the bed. When he got a couple steps down the ladder he tugged gently on her ankle. "C'mon. Ain't gonna get us killed tryin' to do that up there."
Carol moved slowly after him not wanting to risk making the bunk topple.
"Ya ain't gotta move so slow. It was just movin' 'cause it was top-heavy with both of us up there." He urged her.
Carol moved faster to the end of the bed, but she froze when she got there. She could see the expectant look on Daryl's face. She was sure this was going to be a disappointment for him. As much as she wanted this man, needed him. She was having a hard time making herself move for fear that it would all be over once he got a good look at her.
Despite the dark Daryl could see the emotions working over her face. He knew she was nervous. Hell, he was nervous too. He thought he'd already made it clear that nothing mattered but her. He moved to stand in front of her and wrapped his arms around her lower legs. "C'mon."
Finally Carol slid down and made her way down the ladder. As soon as her feet hit the floor Daryl grabbed her and her back hit the wall. He was everywhere all at once. His lips blazed a hot trail down her neck as his hands snaked up her shirt to continue his previously interrupted exploration. The soft moans coming from her were enough to make him come undone. His hands moved to lift her shirt over her head, but she tensed and he pulled away to look at her. What he saw nearly broke his heart. She was terrified. He sighed and let his head fall to her shoulder.
"We ain't gotta do anything." He whispered before he kissed the spot behind her ear.
Carol shook her head. "It's not that. It's…I just…Ed left…marks." She felt like an idiot stuttering through the explanation for her reluctance.
Suddenly Daryl wished Ed were still alive if only so he could kill the bastard himself. He growled low in his throat as he pushed his body into hers trying desperately to show he that he wanted her, scars or no scars. Carol groaned against his neck as she felt him press into her pelvis.
Her hands grabbed his hips and pulled him even closer if that were possible. Then her fingers wandered to the hem of his shirt lifting it just enough so that he understood she wanted him to take it off. He shook his head. He knew she needed to see it. Needed to know that he understood, but this was a part of him only a few had seen and he'd had no control over that. Carol nodded and started to step away, but he grabbed her hands and curled her fingers around the hem of his shirt.
"I can't…" He choked out. But he guided her hands to lift his shirt and lifted his arms so she could pull it off of him. He felt her eyes rake over him knowing she couldn't see much in the dark, but she could see enough. Her hands smoothed over his chest and he took deep shuddering breaths as her fingers traced the marks on his chest and stomach and nearly cried out as her lips followed.
Just as Daryl thought he couldn't take another second without his body catching fire her lips made a slow trail from his bellybutton up his chest and neck and to the spot just behind his ear that wracked his body with a shiver. Carol grabbed his hands and mimicked his early actions encouraging him to pull her own shirt off. He stood wide-eyed for a moment before he pulled the shirt over her head and traced her own scars with hands and lips. When he was finished his mouth trailed kisses back up her stomach before finding a nipple and sucking it softly into his mouth. Daryl smiled as he felt he body momentarily slacken before she regained her legs. He wrapped an arm around her waist to support her.
Carol's hips involuntarily bucked into him and she reached out to cup his very obvious erection again, earning her a strangled moan. She smiled against his neck before pushing into him trying to urge him to the bed. As they shuffled to the bed Carol's hands found the button on his jeans as Daryl's hands pushed hers down over her hips. He guided her down onto the bed and followed after. His fingers traced over the now soaked material between her legs.
"Fuck." He growled into her ear.
Carol moaned in response and pushed her hips up to encourage him to continue. He slipped a finger inside her panties teasing the sensitive skin. He moved his finger just enough to reach her clit and trace tight circles causing her to bury her face in his chest to muffle her moan. Suddenly and without warning his hand moved dragging his finger lower until he slid one long finger into her. She gasped as he pumped slowly creating a steady rhythm that was fixing to drive her insane.
"You like that?" He sounded unsure and she felt his body tense against her.
"More." That was all she could manage to croak out. The hand that had unbuttoned his jeans, but that had fallen still as he worked her, found its place again as she struggled to wriggle her hand between them and into his jeans. Finally she hit pay dirt as her hand wrapped around him causing him to jerk into her.
Daryl watched between them as her hand slid up and down over his cock. She nearly undid him when she swiped her thumb over the head to collect the moisture that had beaded there. He withdrew his hand from her to stop her from ending this too quickly.
"Too much." He panted. "I'm gonna…"
She cut him off with a searing kiss, but her hand stilled on him. She inched even closer to him so that his dick pressed into her core. He unconsciously thrust into her, but her panties still blocked the way. She moved to slip them off when he grabbed her wrist to stop her. She looked up at him, surprised devastation crossing her face at the implied rejection.
"I can't…" He trailed off. "I need you to… Not just one time, I can't…" How the hell was he supposed to tell her that he couldn't just be a one-night stand?
As usual Carol seemed to know what he needed to hear. "I'm not going anywhere." She breathed into his ear. "I need you."
Daryl's body instantly relaxed and he readjusted so his forearms were on either side of her head and was hovering over top of her. One hand reached down and tore her panties off as her hands settled on his hips and pushed his jeans and boxers the rest of the way down. He kicked them the rest of the way off before lining himself up at her entrance.
At that moment two thoughts occurred to him. He'd ripped her panties. She was going to give him hell when they were done. But, more importantly, he wasn't exactly prepared for this. Unlike Glen and Maggie he hadn't been squirreling away condoms. Carol seemed to sense his hesitation and her hands settled back on his hips encouraging him forward.
"It's okay. I can't…" She whispered.
Waves of sadness and relief hit him simultaneously as he slid into her warm, wet core at her direction. He sighed contentedly as he sunk into her fully, burying himself to the hilt. He stayed that way for a long time, moving only millimeters at a time. She knew he was trying to prolong the inevitable, but she could only stand so much. She needed him to start moving before she exploded from the intense pressure. She could most definitely get off on this, the way her moved his hips against her was only making the pure need for him even worse.
She'd never really understood the allure of sex. It hadn't felt good. In fact more times than not it was painful and unpleasant. Ed had been rough and only in it for himself. Daryl, on the other hand, moved with such care and passion that she finally understood why people were so stuck on this. One encounter with Daryl was going to leave her utterly addicted to that man.
Daryl's thoughts mirrored her own as he tried desperately to find some way to calm himself down so this didn't end in one thrust. His experience was limited to messing around with good girls who wanted to rebel in high school and quick fucks in a bar bathroom or the bench seat of his truck as an adult. He'd never brought them home like Merle had. He couldn't understand what Merle got so damn worked up about. Half the time Merle brought some slut home she ended up trying to come onto Daryl when Merle was through with her. He didn't want some quick fuck and he definitely didn't want Merle's sloppy seconds. Carol wasn't either of those things and he was amazed that she'd been receptive to him.
He'd worked hard to make sure she was taken care of, but now she was urging him on. Her hips were bucking up into him trying to take him deeper and make him move. Her breath came in short shallow bursts at his neck as her hands grabbed his ass and urged him on.
She knew he'd been trying to find her release, but she was determined not to fall off that cliff without him. She'd been biting it back for the better part of the encounter, but she wasn't going to be in control of it much longer if he kept dragging his pelvis across her clit in those maddening circles.
"Move, Daryl. Please, just move." She begged him now and he could feel the beginnings of her orgasm clamping down on him.
He groaned as her hands moved back to his hips pushing and pulling just enough to get him to set a rhythm. He moved slow and steady over her and she could feel his release building as he struggled to control his strokes and his speed. His whole body tensed as he fought to control himself.
Carol pulled his face down to hers and kissed him. He kissed her back, but it was no longer gentle and careful. It was hard and rough and filled with need as his tongue warred with hers for control. He was still radiating tension when Carol broke the kiss just long enough to whisper in his ear. "Let go."
To her utter amazement that was all the encouragement he needed. She felt his body shudder against her as his warmth flooded her. That was all it took to send her hurtling after him. He moaned in pure ecstasy as her muscles clamped down on his cock pulling every last drop from him.
Daryl collapsed on top of her and they both struggled to regain their breath. He trailed lazy kisses down her neck before he realized how heavy he must have been laying on top of her like that. He made a move to get off of her, but Carol's arms held him firmly in place.
"Stay." She commanded softly.
He nodded as he shifted some of his weight onto his forearms. "Ain't goin' nowhere."
When Carol was convinced that he wasn't going to go anywhere she released him and trailed a hand up his body until she cupped his cheek. He tilted his face further into her hand. He didn't know how to tell her that he wanted this, that he wanted her, and he hoped desperately that he could show her and she'd understand.
Daryl moved to her side once their breath had evened and the sheen of sweat on their bodies had dried. He pulled her into him and looped one arm around her waist to keep her there as he pulled a blanket up over their now-chilled bodies.
He wished he knew how to tell her how he felt, why he'd been so overprotective. Truth was, Dixons sucked at shit like that. He'd spent his whole life shoving any feeling other than anger right back down into himself. Anger was a feeling Dixons could do, but anything else was out of the question. But this was not a feeling that he wanted to push back down inside himself. He felt vaguely like he wanted to tell the whole world how he felt about her and it was strange to not want to tamp those feelings down.
He let the wheels turn as he tried to let sleep overcome him. Maybe he could tell the whole world, or his whole world anyway. His grip on her waist slackened just a little as exhaustion overcame him. He was curled protectively around her with her face tucked into his chest. Daryl dropped off to sleep just before he could work up the balls to tell her how he felt.
