55. Waiting
You brushed away some of my onyx bangs from in front of my eyes with a weak smile.
I can clearly see now, see the wreckage of what you have become. Your hair, the silky mocha locks I loved so much, is knotted up tighter than the grip you have on my bruised arms. It's greasy too; I can feel the residue on my fingers. Eyes that were once alight with the passions of the world are now dull and blank. They are red-rimmed, then surrounded by dark circles and heavy bags. If you were really here, I suppose you would laugh that laugh I love so terribly much and compare yourself to a raccoon. A fucking scavenger.
That's really what this person who claims to be you is. A stupid leech.
Acne dots what used to be flawless skin, making it look angry and ugly.
When did you….it become so ugly?
"I'm sorry Sasuke," you say. "I didn't mean it, you know I love you more than anything else."
I don't say anything; just stare listlessly at the wall in front of me. There are a few bloodstains on it, probably from one of our multiple fights. They are clearly visible to anyone who enters the room, but anyone who would come here knows it's best not to ask.
If this had been years ago, you would have been appalled by this, this…thing that impersonates you brother. He has become so wrapped up in alcohol and drugs and violence. He is falling apart, breaking down. I'm waiting for the day he stumbles home and dies instead of just waking up the next day and apologizing.
It hurts when he hits me, but I know it's not you. No, I know you could never do such a thing brother. You love me too much. One day, I know you will fight off this demon that had implanted itself into your body. I understand that you just need me to keep waiting for you and believe in you.
Naruto and Sakura and all those others tell me I'm crazy for staying with the thing. They tell me that it really is you and that the way I'm living isn't healthy.
"Itachi has changed," they tell me. "You shouldn't stay and let him do that. One of these days he is going to kill you." I just laugh at them, what would they know? None of them knew you the way I did.
I bet they just want to get me out of the picture so that they can have you all to themselves when you come back.
Well I'm not letting them brother! I will stay with you no matter what happens. I can wait for you; I have the patience. It is okay that the demon become angry and roughs me up a little. I know it will be worth it in the end when I am back in your arms, happy and healthy.
Besides, what did a little blood ever hurt?
73. I Can't
Once in awhile, I ponder the idea that you don't even care about us anymore. I watch you go out with your friends every single night, leaving me in our apartment. To cook and clean and work. Alone.
That is fine, I don't mind, really. I'm naturally a solitary person, as most Uchiha are. I know you tend to be too at times, but I suppose being the second born you were not held under the strict social limitations I had been. Sometimes I am envious of you and your free lifestyle, your plethora of friends little brother.
Even when you come home smelling of other people, I do not get upset (despite the fact you haven't taken me in over two months). It's no secret that you hook up with other individuals. I could do that too, have a little affair with Kisame. He would be willing enough, but I won't. I don't want to hurt you as you have hurt me.
Sometimes they leave you messages on the answering machine or show up at the front door. They seem a little shocked to see me when I open it instead of you. Do you not tell them about us?
No, I suppose it would not be proactive to do such a thing.
I haven't cried in over three months, Sasuke. That was around the time I began to catch onto your little game, also the point I realized I wasn't upset with you. It is not your fault that I can't walk away from my scumbag boyfriend and brother. The only one I can blame is myself.
Sometimes, it seems, that you end up hurting yourself more than anyone else could fathom doing without even trying.
104. Shine
In my hasty retreat from the place I [used to] call home, I knocked over several priceless vases, a large potted plant, and one of the many guests who wandered aimlessly around the mansion. My destination at the time was something I had not been sure of, but my reason for leaving was clear; I had to escape my parents suffocating grasp.
My elder brother, Itachi, was being married to some lord from another kingdom, a man who went by the name of Kismet. He was muscular, with the strangest blue skin tone I had ever looked upon. The hair upon his thick head looked sharp, almost painful to the touch, and eyes were small and beady. His personality was brash and somewhat rude. In simple terms, he was atrocious. My parents did not necessarily enjoy the idea of their heir marrying such a man, but the sacrifice would bring them great power.
With Itachi taken care of, they had turned their sights on me, the youngest. I had always been viewed as the second, unwanted child, therefore given as much freedom as I desired. While my brother had been trained in the ways of a royal and scholar, I had picked up traits from anything but. Painting, playing instruments, forging weapons, battling in the ways of the knight, I could do it all.
My parents, however, were not pleased with such a revelation. As my sibling was to be taken to Kismet's kingdom, I would have to take over as head of our own. I did not meet the qualifications of such a position, and after several lessons- all of which ended with me either flipping a table, vandalizing whatever was in my reach, or attempting to severe the instructors' limbs- it was revealed that I probably never would.
Mother and father seemed to be stuck between a rock and a hard place, and for many glorious weeks I found myself once again free to do whatever I pleased. Everyone, (minus Itachi, who spent every moment he was not forced to spend with his fiancé with me) was preoccupied with planning my elder brothers wedding, so I was put on the back burner momentarily.
I was lucky enough to be listening in on their conversation through the door- I was a nosy little runt- when the issue of oh-so-barbaric me came up. As my shortcomings seemed to be unrequitable, their plan was to marry me off to someone charismatic enough to makeup for my shortcomings. My potential spouses were to be introduced during the reception of Itachis' wedding.
This angered me in ways that I did not think were possible. I had always been seen as second best in comparison to my brother, so them having to marry me off to even come close to what Itachi was alone was belittling. As I child, I remember stating that I would one day grow up to be something great. While my teacher at the time, Kakashi, had gave me an unwavering smile from beneath his mask and patted my head, my parents had given me sympathetic looks.
"Oh Sasuke," my mother had cooed, "You are my little dreamer."
With nasty thoughts in my head, I had sought out my brother in his study. With my calloused hands, I yanked out the vermillion tie that held his silky hair back in a ponytail and began to run my hands through its length (a habit I had picked up as a child). I He said nothing in response to the copious amounts of ranting I was doing, just continued on with his paper work.
Several minutes elapsed before he halted my action by clutching onto my wrist with his elegant fingers. Swiveling around in his chair, he pulled my head downwards and gave me a chaste kiss on the lips.
"Collect yourself Sasuke," he murmured in his soft voice "everything will work out in the end."
I had sighed before positioning my arms around his dainty waist- Itachi really was like a woman with a dick- and falling to the floor. His body crashed upon my own and he gave me an annoyed glare as several of his important documents drifted to the floor, along with his glasses.
"Some of us actually have work to do you know," he practically snarled at me, attempting to push away.
With a devious look in my dark orbs, I tightened my hold and pressed his head to my chest. "I know, but right now you have a different problem to take care of."
I ran my tongue along the expanse of his milky neck, causing him to shudder slightly. Flipping our position, so I was on top, I ground my hips into his and was rewarded with a mouthwatering groan. "And this issue won't be solved by you filling out paperwork."
It should not have been a surprise to anyone that my brother and I were in relationship; the affinity had been there since I was a child. I mean, what kind of older sibling actually enjoys when their five year old brother tags along with them all day? The idea of Itachi becoming married to a man I had little respect for made my gut churn, especially due to the fact it was done for a petty thing like more power. Sometimes my parents were sicker than my sibling and myself.
It was the day before Itachi was to be married that I decided to flee. As I had watched person after person enter the castle fro beside mother and father (usually I was allowed to stay in my room during formal gatherings), I realized this was not the life I wanted for myself. There was nothing wrong with the people here, except maybe their petty views and opinions, but it was not what I desired for myself. With an excuse of feeling extremely nauseous, I had escaped to my bedchambers.
After packing a light bag- filled with only three sets of clothes, enough funds for a few days of sustenance, and a photo of my brother and myself- I had climbed down from my balcony and dodged the guards patrolling the courtyard. Peeking in one of the windows that I snuck by, I had gazed upon Kisame with one arm wrapped around Itachi's waist. His fat hand and thick fingers were squeezing my brothers' ass, an action that I was quite appalled at. That man was a vile creature.
The shrubbery was easy enough to maneuver through, as there was a large hole in it near the south side of the mansion. After untangling myself and rubbing at a few scratches I had obtained from the tightly packed branches, I had started off towards the nearby town of Konoha. While it was run by my parents' enemies, I had created a few friends there during my training (my parents had not ever paid attention to where I disappeared to, despite the fact it would be for weeks at a time) that would be sure to help me make something of myself.
I would make me, make it for myself. One day, when I was a great whatever I wished to be, I would make sure to return and prove to my mother and father just how amazing I could be without their stupid help. Kidnapping my brother from Kisame would be on the top of the list too, that ugly man did not even deserve to touch my brother.
It was my time to shine.
A/N: I haven't updated this in over a month... My priorities have been elsewhere *cough Rural Mentality and NI cough cough* and I have had tests and such in school. I hope you all haven't forgotten about this here! The last quarter is coming up, so I won't have as much time to write as I have a boatload of tests! Spring break is after this week, however, so I hope to write during that time!
I apologize if this isn't that great, I haven't written ItaSasu/SasuIta in a long time as I've been caught up in writing NaruSasu.
Thank you to my lovely reviewers from last chapter!
Culut-Camia: Haha, thank you very much! Your grammar is amazing, by the way, much better than many people I have seen! Do not doubt yourself!
WishUponAHoshi: Thank you for the review! I aim to please!
Sora Keyblader: If only a yaoi-mobile existed! I was honestly planning to continue it this chapter, but then it started to get really long and I felt bad for not updating this in forever, so I saved what I had written for another chapter and wrote Shine instead. So it should be continued in one of the next chapters!
I live your guys support! The authoress loves reviews (as much as Itachi loves his little brother) so drop me one if you get the time! Flames are accepted as usual!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any characters associated with the series. The plots, however, are my own.
