What if

Jacob got the dog catcher called on him?

Jacob let out a throaty laugh and dodged the man. The human stumbled feebly and swished the large net in his hands. He cursed as he stumbled onto the ground and the wolf kicked dirt onto him and ran off into the distance. The dog catcher, in that moment made a promise to himself: that all these weird wolves would be erased from the people of Fork's memories. As if.

Jacob ran back to the Cullen's house. He knew that this was a stupid idea, I mean why would you go back to where the person who just got you in trouble? Jacob smiled to himself as Seth phased and joined his once solo argument.

Please don't be too harsh, it's just Leah. Don't let her get on your nerves Jake. Seth thought.

She called the freaking dog catcher on me, that's the third time this week, and its Tuesday. Jake argued.

She's a jerk, but-

She is the best werewolf in the whole world and could so beat any boys at racing. Leah cut in. Jacob stopped in front of the house and laughed. Leah was sitting like a real guard dog in front of the door. Her tail was wagging and Renesmee was sitting next to her.

"Jake!" Renesmee yelled and she ran over to Jake and Seth. "And Seth!" She hugged them both and hopped onto Jacob's back.

Jacob nudged her with his wet nose and she laughed. Jacob licked her, from chin to hairline, leaving a long line of saliva up her face.

"Eww Jake, now I'm all wet." Renesmee sighed and she tried to use his mountains of fur as a towel. Jacob laughed and started toward the house. Seth came up behind him and Leah ran up beside Jacob and tried to trip him. Renesmee giggled as Jacob tumbled into the first step, leaving a huge dent in the shape of his head, ears and all. Renesmee hoped onto Seth's back as Jacob slowly got up and strutted up the stairs. Seth followed him.

Jacob changed into his human form and plopped down on the couch. The couch creaked and crashed into two pieces. "Oops," he said.

Renesmee came over to him and screamed one, harsh world.

"ALICE!"

"Renesmee, look what you did, why would you call Alice, she's gonna kill me." Jacob argued. "You know she doesn't like cleaning up."

"What makes you think I'm cleaning it up?" Alice asked as Leah sneaked away from the living room and up the stairs, her wagging tail kept hitting the family's tchotchkes off of carefully balanced shelves and mantle places. Leah smiled carefully to herself and slid into the visitor's bedroom she was now residing in.

"Well who's cleaning it up then?" Jacob asked and bit his tongue as he slowly backed out of the room and onto the porch. Alice stepped out and hung against the doorframe.

"ESME! Jacob broke you antique couch, and got mud all over the house!"

Right there Jake took off running with his tail between his legs. Even though Esme, along with her husband and the rest of the Cullen family had accepted him as family, he feared Esme. Not of her size, or intimidation. But because of her voice, he just couldn't stand hearing her upset or angry. Emmett enjoyed each moment of the monstrosity, maybe even Edward and Jasper when they got into their tomfooleries. Defiantly not himself though, it was just that mothering voice and maternal offering of thirds and fifths of cookies that made him melt.

Jacob looked over his shoulder to see Alice skipping around on the porch as Esme stood dumbfounded on the steps. Jake smiled at her and screamed that he was sorry, but kept running. At one moment he thought he heard footsteps behind him, but it was probably Alice prancing around trying to scare him.

In less then five minuets he hit the city limits and he sat down on the sidewalk, still in wolf form. He turned around, and felt a sharp pain in his butt; he looked around and saw that same dog catcher as before with a veterinarian's bottle of KOing liquid inserted into his backside, with a net around his body. He was unconscious in about ten second flat.

Jacob awoke in a small cage with a blood hound curled up around his ankles. He stood up and the bloodhound let out a heartrending cry and curled up against a St. Bernard in the corner that was eating some dog food.

"Jacob! What did we ever tell you about running away?" Leah asked as Jacob came to the front of the cage and pushed his wet muzzle in the bars. The guard came out with a large jingling pocket of keys. Jacob smiled and him and the other dogs whined at him.

"Aw, did you make friends?" Alice asked as she and Leah skipped to the cage.

"You know what, Alice?" Leah asked.

"Yes Leah?" Alice smiled at the plan.

"We'll take the lot!" she smiled at the animal rescuer's face as she threw a few hundred dollar bills onto the ground while thrusting the door open. Jacob ran foreword and gestured for the rest of the dogs to go foreword he followed them into the parking lot before they all hoped into Alice's Porsche.

Alice came in a few minutes later, dancing out with Leah who had about twenty documents in her hands. They hopped in the front seats as Jacob stuck his head in front of the car, and slobbered all over the front seat, and sat in front of Leah's seat as he stuck his head out the window and howled at bypassing cars, whose passengers stuck their heads in the air and often smacked themselves silly.

And they rode out into the horizon, with car crashes and slobber all over the closed roads and barriers made behind them to prevent future ideals and episodes of rivers of werewolf slobber on the road that was to be slipped on like banana peals to their soon impending doom. And this was all caused by the same people who brought you a hundred dogs peeing in your yard because you complained about your broken bones. Its tough making sense to magical creatures, isn't it?

Author's note: Like? Dislike? I'm sorry for not updating this story in so long, I've been preoccupied, long stories and all that jazz! Well, here's the seventh chapter in my upcoming story fanatic. No, I haven't given up on this story and plan to end with 50 chapters. Do you think this is smart, or should I abandon this story? Ideas? Send hopes, wishes, and those comical smiley skits via review. Thanks for reading!