Seven
Xavier stared at him, tears sliding down his face. Roman, who was sitting down beside him, held his hands in his.
He mouthed an "I love you" to him. Xavier's eyes locked with his. Roman watched him draw in a deep breath before he slowly closed his eyes.
There was no more breathing. His face was still.
He was gone.
Roman placed a soft kiss to his lips and forehead, lingering over there before covering him from head to toe with a blanket.
Then he broke down and cried.
But Roman knew, as he stared across an unconscious Dean in the hospital, that losing him would have been more painful than when he lost Xavier.
This was so sudden. Should Dean had any serious injuries and succumb to it, he'd been cruelly snatched from Roman before he had the chance to give him the life he rightfully deserved.
But thankfully he didn't. He was made of tougher stuff.
The doctor said he had broken his left arm and suffered a whiplash. Scans suggested that he may suffer memory loss as well.
He caressed his boyfriend's hands as Brennan looked on sadly.
"Do you want to drink anything?" Brennan asked, standing up.
Roman shook his head. He wanted to be here when Dean woke up.
"Alright, man. I'm-"
"B-Brennan…"
Roman stood up just as Brennan rushed to Dean's side too. "Dean?"
"Brennan…" Dean's eyes slowly opened. "Brennan."
"Yeah it's me, Dean."
"I feel all sorts of fucked up."
Brennan sat down beside him on the bed and held his hand. "That's to be expected. You were in a hit and run accident, you know."
Roman wondered if Dean had forgotten about him. Maybe the accident wiped out all his memories of them together.
He looked at Roman with a confused look, pulling his hand away from him. "Who are you?"
"I'm your boyfriend, Dean."
Dean look at Brennan terrified. "Babe, what's he talking about?"
Babe? So it was true. He had lost memories of them.
"Dean," Roman explained. "We met when you got out of prison. I gave you a job in my gym as my personal assistant and we fell in love. We even live together."
"I doubt it," Dean retorted. "No offense and all but you're not my type."
Don't take it personally, he reminded himself. He's alive. That's what's important. "Well, maybe when you're better, I can show you some things that will help trigger your memory."
"Maybe." He looked at Brennan. "Can you let the doctor know I'm up?"
Brennan agreed and left the room.
Roman knew he had to try again. "Dean-"
"What?"
"I'm going to bring some stuff over in a couple of days. And when you're up to it, I'll bring you to some places-"
"You don't get it, do you? I'm not interested in you."
"You're just saying that because you have no recollection-"
"With all due respect, please leave me alone. I just got up and I need more rest. Come back another day."
"Maybe the day after?"
"I'll let you know. In the meantime, just leave me alone."
Brennan returned with a doctor who started asking Dean some questions. Roman felt awkward just being there - because of Dean's side glances every now and then - so he excused himself .
"Roman!"
He stopped walking on his way out when Brennan called after him. "Hey."
"Look, I'll try to talk to him okay? His memory seems to be only of what his life was before he went to jail."
"I know. And thanks, Brennan. I appreciate it. I just hope that I can find something that will trigger his memory."
"There will be. There has to be. Why don't you come over tomorrow?"
"I'm not sure…" It may aggravate Dean and Roman did not want to see him pissed off.
"I insist."
"Okay."
When he got home, he took out a t-shirt Dean had printed in San Diego on their first trip together, a picture of Mitch and Mr Grizlee. With any luck, Dean would remember a little of their time together.
"Didn't I ask you to leave me alone?"
Roman was taken aback by Dean's hostility the next day. He put the gift basket consisting of two Stephen King books and, a crossword puzzle book and a mechanical pencil, two cans of diet Mountain Dew and a packet of pistachios aside and stared at his boyfriend. "I was hoping that you'd be up to talk-"
"No, I'm not," Dean snapped. "So just beat it."
Undeterred, he took out a t-shirt with the words, "This Lunatic Runs the Asylum," out from his bag. "You made this with four more others when we went to San Diego three months ago. Keep it with you? It may help you jog your memory-"
"Yeah, Brennan was telling me about us but maybe I don't remember you because of what a horrible boyfriend you are."
That hurt.
"He mentioned you being hung up over a dead boyfriend so much that I felt bad. Here's a thought: maybe you hurt me so much that I can't remember you."
"Dean," Roman said, his heart breaking. "I may talk about him but I don't… you were never second place to him. I love you more than I ever loved him."
His boyfriend snorted. "Sure. You expect me to believe that?"
"It's the truth," the Samoan boxer insisted. "Dean-"
"Brennan!" Dean called out. "Can you ask him to leave? His presence is agitating me."
"It's alright." Roman put the three items he brought next to the gift basket. "I'll go. I hope you get well soon, Dean. I love you."
"Don't ever come back again."
That was a verbal knockout if Roman had ever heard any.
He walked out of the room where Brennan was talking to someone on the phone. He didn't even bid Roman goodbye. On the way to the lift, he asked the staff to charge the hospitalisation stay and other miscellaneous costs like medicines to his credit card.
He saw Brennan enter the room with a huge smile on his face.
Maybe he deserved what Dean had dished out to him in the room.
All those times he had made the auburn haired man feel bad about himself, all those time he had let him feel second place… Roman meant it when he told Dean he'd do it all over again with him.
Was it true though? Was Dean so hurt that he subconsciously forgot about him?
"Roman!"
He opened the taxi door and found Brennan running towards him. Deja vu. "I'm going off, Brennan. Take care of Dean."
"Wait. You're leaving?"
"He doesn't want me around and honestly, the things that he had said… I wish you both the best. Really."
Brennan didn't even protest. "Thanks, man. I appreciate it."
There was nothing else to say. Maybe, someday, Dean would remember him and if he didn't, that was okay; he deserved the best.
After all, he had helped Roman climb out of the dark hole he was in.
Dean sipped the warm water Brennan had brought him as the doctor was reviewing his case in the file. "So can I go home, Doc?"
The doctor, Chris Amann, continued reading the file.
Dean sighed. His eyes fell on the things Roman had brought just now. They seem foreign to him. What the hell was that plant? And that teddy bear? These things weren't him.
Dr Amann laughed. "Well, your blood pressure seems okay. Your arm should take about six to eight weeks. You're a real lucky man, Mr Ambrose."
"Luck? Luck had nothing to do with it. I'm indestructible."
"So can he go back?" Brennan asked excitedly.
Dean stretched his arms. It'd be good to leave this place; he never liked hospitals. "Yeah, can I?"
"We'll observe you for a few hours," the doctor replied. "One more x ray and we're good to go."
Brennan grinned and sat down beside him. "Don't worry; you'll be home in no time."
Dean leaned over and kissed him. "We'll be home in no time."
Roman decided to head to the gym, after his visit with Dean, to get a good workout to clear his head.
"Hey, Roman," Randy said, walking up to him with a water bottle in hand. "How's Dean?"
He shook his head. "He's awake but he can't seem to remember me. At all."
His friend's face fell. "I'm sorry to hear that. What can he remember though?"
"His life before me. Brennan and him…" He took a deep breath, willing himself not to breakdown. "Where's Coach?"
"Oh. He's over there at the corner with Brock."
Roman froze. "What?"
"Brock Lesnar. Dude came into the gym yesterday, asking him to train. Offered him a lot of money too."
"This isn't like Coach. He was never about the money."
"A lot has changed, Roman. We're not breaking even here."
"But how could he when he knew how Brock and I feel about one another…"
"I can't answer that, man."
It seemed like the universe was against him at that moment. Dean not wanting him anymore. Coach training a nemesis of his. Heck, his car was back at the repair shop again.
"He's taught me everything I know…" Roman said as he watched Brock talking to Coach Ron in a corner with Paul.
Paul.
Even Paul had abandoned him. Randy followed his gaze and sighed sadly. "Roman, I know it looks bad… but you see-"
"No, it's more than that. Coach and Paul know me, Randy. They also know that I'm planning to head back into the ring. How can they train him when-"
"Money."
"I have lots of it!" You think you know someone and then you don't. Neither Coach or Paul gave him any indication throughout the years that it was about money. "Whatever happened to loyalty?"
"Sometimes, people change, Roman. I mean you used to love Xavier. Now you love Dean."
"That's called moving on, Randy."
"And they've moved on."
"I just trained with him barely two days ago!" The idea was revolting. This was more than moving on; this felt like a betrayal. "I've got to go, man. Take care of yourself."
"Wait!" Randy chased him as he walked out of the gym. "Roman! Don't you want to talk to Coach?"
He missed Dean. He needed Dean. He wished he could just lay in his arms while the rest of the world passed by.
But he no longer had that luxury.
For all he knew, Dean was already at home with Brennan, making their own plans for their future.
Maybe he should do the same too.
There was no way he could stay here. He had nothing left in Carlisle. Every place he went to would be a reminder of how he had failed.
The chances of Dean coming back to him was also slim. But that didn't mean he stopped caring for him. Or stopped loving him. He'd leave the house for him to live in.
After all, it was because of him that Roman even bought it.
At two in the morning with the radio being played in the background, he was almost done with his packing. He didn't need many things aside from his essentials. The rest Dean could do whatever he want with it; at this point, the former champion didn't care.
Maybe I didn't love you
Quite as often as I could have
And maybe I didn't treat you
Quite as good as I should have
If I made you feel second best
Dear I'm sorry I was blind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
The tears he had been trying to hold back for so long slid down his cheeks.
There were many things he should have said or done but now it was too late. He should have told Dean how much he loved him, adored him… how proud he was to call Dean his.
Now… now he had to learn to live a life without him.
The bus station at Carlisle was quite empty but Roman supposed it was because of the rain. He adjusted his ponytail while finishing up his black coffee. He could see a couple of buses and contemplated which town he should head to.
Somewhere small or big? Roman couldn't decide.
Rolling his luggage behind towards the ticket counter, he decided to see what his options were.
"Aren't you a boxer?" a gruff voice asked behind him.
Nothing he wasn't unfamiliar with. "Yeah I am."
"Roman Reigns."
He stopped in mid steps when he heard his name being called. The man reached his side and when the light hit on his face, Roman knew who he was.
"You're Rocky Johnson," he said.
Former Heavyweight champion from the eighties. Hailed as the toughest SOB in in the industry right before the man disappeared off the face of the planet.
No reason was given for his sudden departure. He became a recluse… until now.
"That's my name. Don't wear it out, kid." He looked at Roman's luggage. "You heading somewhere?"
"Away from here. Not really sure where though."
"Why are you running?"
"Because there's too much pain in Carlisle." He missed Dean terribly. But with Brennan, he'd have a better life than the one Roman had given him.
Roman was sure of that.
"You know word on the street is that you've taken up boxing again," Rocky said. "I'm intrigued. But more than that, I want to train you."
That caught his attention. "Why me?"
"Because I think you're the best, kid. You've got the heart and respect for this sport. You've got the skills. You're the whole package. The boxing world needs a champion and that's you."
"Sorry to disappoint you but I'm done boxing. I don't need it anymore."
"Really? Am I talking to the Roman Reigns who knocked out Brock Lesnar in twenty seconds? That Roman Reigns? Why are you throwing in the towel, kid?"
Roman didn't answer him.
"You're too young to retire. And I find it hard to believe that you're done with boxing. I've watched you, Roman. I've seen the way you are in the ring. You shone brightly years ago and damn it, I know you can do the same thing again. It's your time! Go out there and show those men out there how boxing is meant to be done. You are good, kid. You are really good and I'll be damned if talent and passion like yours go down the drain." Rocky looked at him intently. "You can't give up now… you just can't!"
His words echoed what Dean had said before his accident. "Boxing's your heart and soul," Dean had said. "It's your life… no matter what, don't give it up again."
He had to back to his roots to find who he was. And to do that, he had to let go and leave everything behind.
He stared at Rocky. Never had he thought that he would have this man offering to train him. Not what he had planned but life was full of surprises recently.
"Okay. Let's do it."
A/N My apologies for the delay. I was admitted back to hospital again. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thank you for your kind words, favorites and follows.
