Title: The Perfect Wife

Author: slytherin-nette

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters you recognize from the HP books in this story. All I own is the plot. Everything else belongs to JK Rowling. She rocks.

Pairings: DM/femHP, RW/LrM, BZ/HG, SB/RV, BM/??, AM/?? and many others.

Warnings: This is a Post-Hogwarts story so it will be slightly more mature than TPG but equally insane. Wahaha. Also, this story contains PREGNANCY, RATED scenes and SLASH relationships.

A/N: Can I just say that I LOVE my readers so much? :D You guys are the BEST and I thank you all for the wonderful support you gave me in your reviews! Hugs to everyone! *HUGS* Yay! Since we got a bit of humor in the last chapter, I figured a little bit of fluffy D/H romance would do us some good in this one. ;) Enjoy!


Chapter 7 – The Second Trimester

"So how is your wife's pregnancy coming along, Master Malfoy?"

Draco nearly jumped in shock; blinking up as Richard Wickham entered his office in St. Mungo's that morning. The Head Healer was met with the sight of the young Malfoy Head fidgeting around and twitching nervously in his seat. Upon further inspection of the younger man's disheveled hair and the dark circles under his eyes, Wickham's eyebrow rose further as he sat down onto his seat.

"Are you okay, Master Malfoy? You look a little tired." He mused as Draco twitched again at having been addressed and looked up at him with wide eyes. He laughed nervously for a second, snapping his head back behind him as though to make sure he wasn't being followed before he swallowed and jerkily edged his seat closer to Wickham's table.

"Er—Fine! Haha! F—Fine! I'm doing great! My w—wife's fine… She's—" He stopped and his eyes widened even more as he leaned in eerily close to Wickham over the table. The older man looked nervous at this and leaned back against his seat, watching as Draco gave him a dark, conspiratorial look and held a finger to his lips as though to indicate silence.

"—been really…demanding lately…REALLY demanding actually—" Draco laughed nervously again, his voice sounding choked up as he ran a hand through his hair. "—And I have to ask…The hormones…Is there any way to…you know…REPRESS them just a little bit?!" The Malfoy Head sounded desperate as he said this but unfortunately, all he got was a firm shaking of Wickham's head.

"I'm afraid that will not be advisable for the condition of your sons, Mr. Malfoy—"

"ANYTHING AT ALL?! I'll pay you whatever you want!" Draco snapped, his voice raising several levels as he slammed his fist against the table and gave the older man a maniacal glare.

Wickham gave him a stern glare over his glasses, tutted and shook his head firmly again as though in disapproval. "Mr. Malfoy, your wife is a VERY attractive young woman and you are at the PRIME of your youth. I'm sure you can handle her sexual urges for another month or so. Besides, they should subside soon—" His sentence ended in a gasp of fear when Draco promptly jumped up onto the table, seized him by the front of his robes and began jostling him like a child begging for candy.

The Head Healer's eyes widened more in horror when he was met with the sight of the blonde's furious bloodshot eyes and the angry sneer on his lips. "I haven't slept in THREE DAYS! Okay?! She wants sex…ALL THE TIME! I—it's like there's no satisfying her! She's a bloody insatiable….WILDCAT! She keeps me up the entire NIGHT and wakes me up by pouncing on me the next morning!" Draco exploded out loud, his voice echoing around the walls of the large office.

Wickham gave him a sheepish cringe and tried to remove the blonde's tight grasp on his robes but Draco didn't seem to be quite finished yet.

"I—I mean I like sex too! I'm a MAN! I LOVE sex but SHE—" He let out a choked up laugh and ran a shaking hand through his messed up blonde hair again. "—SHE wants it ALL THE BLOODY TIME! It's like a VICIOUS CYCLE and I'm BLOODY TIRED! Every muscle in my body is SORE and I swear to Merlin, my crotch is so overused that it's beginning to HURT—"

Wickham cut him right off at that and shoved him away in growing discomfort, coughing loudly as he tried to clear the disturbing images away. "Master Malfoy, control yourself! Please!" He croaked out in shock, hastily adjusting his robe collar as Draco blinked frantically at him again.

Before Wickham could say anything else, the blonde had seized him by his robes again and gave him a desperate, pleading look. "Please…You've got to help me! Help me give her a…SEDATIVE or something! Or any type of potion or spell or whatever to make her go to sleep?! O—or m-maybe I can just kn—knock her out myself, could I do that?! Huh?!" He looked imploringly at the older man but Wickham answered him by raising an eyebrow and giving him a pointed glare.

"You did NOT just suggest knocking out the woman carrying YOUR children, Draco."

Draco relented and he loosened his grip on Wickham's robes, only to bang his head repeatedly on the table. "I—I know, I didn't mean that! I—I would NEVER do something like that but I NEED REST, WICKHAM! And my pregnant, SEX-CRAZED wife isn't giving me any!" He protested, grunting as Wickham shoved him off the table and ushered him back onto his chair.

"Have you tried taking in a powerful sleeping draught? That ought to help get you to sleep and that should also signal your wife that you need to rest for awhile." He suggested, leafing through Jaimee's medical folder as he sat back down calmly behind his table.

Draco merely grunted again and dropped his head into his hands, yawning loudly to himself. "I already tried that, Wickham. It only worked once." He grumbled, his voice laced with misery.

Wickham blinked and flicked to the next page to scribble something onto the report. "Oh…? And why is that? What happened? Did you run out of potion or something?

Draco looked up and gave him a helpless, defeated smirk.

"She secretly replaced all the sleeping draughts in the house with aphrodisiac."

"……………"


"Uncle Lucius, how many times must I tell you that I have absolutely NO intention of pursuing marriage?!" Anton growled irritably for the fifth time that morning over breakfast in the formal dining room in Malfoy Manor. He glared at Lucius' disapproving glare over the table and ignored the consoling look Narcissa was trying to send them both from where she was seated beside her husband.

"You are a Malfoy, Anton…And you'll be turning twenty next month! If you don't start looking for a bride soon, I will ARRANGE a marriage for you with someone of MY choosing!" Lucius threatened darkly, sneering at the younger blonde as Anton looked as though he wanted to protest.

"Y—you can't do that! Byron isn't married yet too, you know! I—"

"Yes and I intend to have this same conversation with him soon, trust me." Lucius cut him off with another low drawl, sneering when Anton seemed to sputter in indignation. "B—but, D—Draco is just about to provide TWO possible heirs for the family soon! Why do I still have to get married?!" He croaked out angrily, slamming his fist impatiently onto the table.

Lucius just raised an eyebrow and took a careful sip of his goblet of wine. "Because EVERY Malfoy son is required to marry and have a possible heir. You know that, Anton. Come now, you've been with plenty of women before. Surely you can find a suitable match for you—"

"Women like Jaimee aren't exactly easy to come by these days, Uncle Lucius. She wasn't even naturally a woman in the first place." Anton interrupted him sarcastically, rolling his eyes as he began picking at the remaining food on his plate.

The former Malfoy Head chuckled in agreement at this but shook his head firmly. "I have already discussed matters with Louis. We have scheduled you to meet several daughters of our good family friends this week and following that, I have—" Lucius was cut right off when the entrance doors to the dining room slid open, causing all three Malfoys to look up and blink at Draco's shaking, panting form heaving in exhaustion just outside the doorway.

At the sight of their surprised staring at him, the Malfoy Head laughed nervously, drawing both his parents' attention to his haphazardly worn clothing and the unusually haggard state of his hair. Narcissa gaped in surprise as Draco squinted blearily several times and gave a nervous smile.

Forgetting completely about what they had been arguing about, Anton raised a single eyebrow in concealed amusement. "Good morning, my dear cousin…Just woke up, did you? Or do you really just leave your robes unbuttoned like that?" He commented casually, muffling a snigger when Draco flinched in embarrassment at his words and hastily tried to button up his clothes.

Instead of answering him, the older Malfoy son took one quick glance around the room and swallowed the painful lump in his throat. "G—good morning, Mother…Father…Anton… H—Harry's not here, is she?" He stammered out in a high-pitched voice, laughing nervously when both Lucius and Narcissa blinked at him again in confusion before dumbly shaking their heads.

"No, she isn't sweetheart. I think she's in the living room, Shall I call for her—" Narcissa paused in the middle of her sentence when Draco flinched again and shook his head frantically at her.

"N—No! Th—that's okay, Mother! P—please keep her away for awhile!" He gasped out, laughing nervously once more. He raised a trembling hand and pushed the stray strands of blonde hair out of his face – allowing Lucius and Anton to see the dark circles under his eyes.

Just as Anton was going to make another sly comment about this, Lucius raised a condescending eyebrow at his son and spoke up in a clear, disapproving tone of voice.

"Draco, as your father and a former Head of this family, I feel obliged to reprimand you right now. Would you look at the state of your robes and hair? You look as though you just rolled out of bed." Lucius drawled sarcastically, eyeing his trembling son in slight disdain.

Draco smiled uneasily at his father's words and stepped into the dining room, closing the door silently behind him. "I—I really did just wake up, Father…U—uhm, Mother, would you mind moving your chair a bit?" He asked, causing Narcissa to look confused at this strange request.

She nodded and shifted her chair backwards a couple of inches before turning back to look at him. "Of course, darling. But I don't understand, why—" She never got to finish her sentence as Draco promptly crouched down, crawled right through the table cloth and settled himself underneath the long, wooden dining table – causing both his parents to choke on their drinks and Anton to burst into barely muffled laughter.

"DRACO! WHAT IN MERLIN'S NAME—"

Lucius was right in the middle of reprimanding Draco again when at that exact moment, the doors to the dining room slid open. Blinking in confusion, all three Malfoys looked up and gaped at the sight of one very irritated Jaimee peering her head into the dining room, her green eyes narrowed as she seemed to scourge the entire area in search of something.

At the sight of three Malfoys staring at her, she smiled at them and inclined her head briefly in greeting. "Good morning. By any chance, have any of you seen Draco anywhere?" She asked casually, walking over to the dining table and grabbing a treacle tart from one of the dessert plates.

Anton grinned deviously, his blue eyes twinkling in mischief. "Actually, Harry… If you're looking for Draco, he's—OW! BLOODY HELL!" He cut himself off when he felt Draco kick him from under the table, causing the male half-veela to wince in pain and scowl in irritation.

"ARGH! Bastard!" He growled, kicking his older cousin right back and sneering when he heard Draco's unmistakable curse of pain near his feet. Jaimee raised an eyebrow when she heard this, her eyes narrowing carefully at Anton in growing suspicion.

"What was that?" She asked, walking over to him and inspecting his features carefully. Anton felt Draco kicking him lightly again in warning and in spite of himself, he forced out a reassuring laugh. "N—nothing, Harry! I just…stubbed my toe against something! Ehehe…" He pushed back several strands of blonde hair out of his eyes and ignored Harry's disbelieving glare.

"A—anyway, as I was saying… If you're looking for Draco, he's probably in the East Wing of the Manor. Why don't you go and try checking the libraries?" He suggested hastily, a big, plastered smile on his face when Harry simply raised an eyebrow at him in evident disbelief.

"Hmm…Is that so?" She would have said more but Lucius drew her attention by clearing his throat and giving her a calm, inquisitive glance. "Good morning, Potter…I see you're already showing. How is your pregnancy coming along now? This is your fifth month, am I correct?" He asked carefully, smirking wider when he heard Draco's grateful sigh of relief from underneath the table.

Harry glared uncertainly at him for a minute before looking down and poking at her pregnant belly. "It's horrible, actually…I can't believe I have to last FOUR more months! At least the morning sickness, frequent bouts of urination and annoying breast swelling and tenderness have all subsided somewhat….Now all I have to worry about is trying not to WADDLE while I walk."

The words 'breast swelling and tenderness' brought a flush to both Lucius and Anton's faces, both males shifting awkwardly in their seats.

Narcissa simply chuckled and gave her daughter-in-law a comforting smile. "Well you look wonderful, darling. How are things going with Mr. Wickham? Has he been helping you with that…little problem…we talked about the other day?" She tried to ask this without blushing but unfortunately, she could already feel the blood rushing into her cheeks as soon as the words left her mouth.

Harry shrugged, reaching over the table to grab another treacle tart. "You mean the increased sexual drives? Well he did suggest some…positions…we could try that may be more physically satisfying for me but lately, it doesn't seem to work and they've accomplished nothing but tiring Draco out more than usual." She answered quite bluntly, unwittingly causing Narcissa to flush darker and both Lucius and Anton to spit out their drinks in horrified shock.

Amused at their reactions, she heard a loud, painful 'THUD' somewhere under the table – followed by a loud 'Ooomph! Owwwwww!' that indicated to her exactly where her elusive husband was hiding. Smirking to herself in realization, she raised an eyebrow knowingly at Anton's sheepish smile.

"So…Draco's in the library…Is he, Anton?" She asked, glaring pointedly at the half-veela as Anton managed another weak smile in apology. At this point, Lucius was already drinking directly from a bottle of wine in dismay while Narcissa was patting her husband comfortingly on the back.

Feeling another Slytherin urge stirring up inside her, Harry walked over to the end of the table and sat down in an exaggeratedly feminine manner beside her flustered father-in-law. Lucius visibly stiffened but didn't say anything as Harry reached over and helped herself to a glass of juice.

She cleared her throat briefly before speaking, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes as she sensed Draco's growing nervousness underneath the table. "Oh no…Don't get me wrong, Lucius…By what I said, I didn't mean Draco couldn't perform well in the bedroom. That wasn't what I meant at all…In fact, you should be very proud of him. Your son knows exactly how to rattle a headboard in ways that would make even the most experienced courtesan blush—"

Before she had even finished her sentence, Narcissa had already begun choking on her own glass of wine while her husband wasn't much better off and looked as though he had just swallowed a flobberworm. His aristocratic face frozen in dismay, Lucius ignored Anton's attempts at shoving an entire loaf of bread into his mouth to muffle his laughter and gave Harry a shaky smile.

"Uhm…Th—that's…my…boy?"

They heard another loud 'THUD' from under the table – followed by Draco's small whimper of pain and horrified embarrassment. Jaimee's smirk widened at this and she chuckled, turning her attention to Narcissa instead now that Lucius seemed unable to blink or do anything else except stare off into empty space with a haunted look in his silver eyes.

"O—of course, not that I meant he's a brute all the time or anything though, Narcissa. Don't worry…Your son can also be very gentle when he wants to be. He has the stamina of an animal though…We'd be at it for hours a night. I have to ask…Does he get it from Lucius?" She asked casually, looking at the older woman and raising her eyebrows at the look of horror on Narcissa's face.

Her mother-in-law's eyes had widened comically, her pale cheeks almost as pink as the lace on her evening dress. "I—I beg your pardon, Jaimee?! Th—that is…I—I uh…L—Lucius, I uh—" She turned to seek help from her husband, cringing in desperation when all Lucius seemed capable of doing was drowning himself in wine to erase the images of his son's 'skills' from his mind.

Stifling another laugh, Jaimee crossed her legs primly and took a long sip from her goblet of juice. She saw Anton hiding another mirthful smile behind his hand but she ignored him, intent on coaxing her husband out from under the table with as much public humiliation as possible.

"And then there's his impressive spontaneity. I have to hand it to your son, Lucius. He comes up with the most creative ideas in bed…Did you know that he has a thing for leather, handcuffs and bunny ears and just a little bit of spanking every now and then? Did you also know that we actually did it once on your office de—" The rest of Harry's sentence was cut off sharply when Draco finally sputtered out loud and scrambled out from under the table, stumbling all over himself in his haste and shaking his head in frantic desperation.

"EEYARGH! ALRIGHT! Alright, alright! Damn it! I give up, Potter! You've made your point, you win! STOP IT ALREADY AND SHUT UP!" He blurted out, laughing in a high-pitched, shaky tone of voice as he met his parents' stunned and horror-stricken pale faces. Narcissa's fork had slipped from her hand and clanged noisily against her plate while Lucius – in his attempt to take a long swig of wine – missed his mouth and ended up spilling his drink all over the front of his robes.

Both older Malfoys were staring at Draco with wide, unblinking eyes – their mouths stuck in an awkward grimace as hundreds of disturbing images involving their son's private 'sexual preferences' began to plague their minds. Draco shifted nervously under their unwavering gazes and raised a shaking hand in a feeble attempt to fix his disheveled blonde hair.

"Ehehe….Uhm…Mother, Father….I uh—I can explain about that—"

"Really, Draco… Bunny ears? How utterly unoriginal and plebeian…I'm disappointed in you." Anton mocked sarcastically with a blatant smirk, breaking the silence as both Draco and Harry turned to look at his heavily amused features. The half-veela was sniggering under his breath, earning a very dangerous glare from Draco as he narrowed his eyes at him in outrage.

"Oh you think this is FUNNY, do you? You half-breed pansy-boy! Why don't I take that plate and stuff it down your insignificant little throat—"

"S—s—spanking, Draco…?" Narcissa croaked out, looking completely scandalized as she blinked out of her stupor long enough to stare at her cringing son. Seeing her staring disbelievingly at him, Draco managed a weak, sheepish smile and raised a single shoulder in a half-shrug.

"M—mother, i—it isn't what you're thinking! I can explain that—" Draco's voice broke off when his mother's eyes finally rolled over to the back of her head. Before either of them could say anything else, Narcissa had collapsed in a dead faint onto the floor. Lucius, however, was still blinking at his son in disbelief as though daring him to deny the allegations while Harry had simply crossed her arms over her chest, a self-satisfied smirk of triumph etched clearly on her features.

"M—my…OFFICE DESK…Draco?"

Hearing his father's voice crack, Draco's wide eyes shifted briefly from his wife's smirk to his father's dazed silver eyes before shifting back to Jaimee again. Instead of answering his father's question, the Malfoy Head finally groaned in defeat, buried his face dejectedly into hands and walked resignedly over to where his wife was seated and curling her finger beckoningly at him.

Harry whistled cheerfully and stood up from her seat, reaching over and grabbing another treacle tart from the table before wordlessly holding a hand out to him with a sweet smile.

"Are we done playing hide and seek now, Draco? Or shall I regale your father with more of your rather interesting preferences? I'm sure Lucius would like to hear more of them." She asked pointedly, grinning wider when all her husband could do was nod weakly in exhausted surrender and offered her the necktie hanging loosely from his neck.

"You win, Potter…Lead the way to the bedroom."

She gave him another sweet smile in response just before seizing his tie and dragging him along as she exited the dining room. Anton watched with a grimace as a very tired looking Draco practically stumbled and tripped behind her. The Malfoy Head looked up once and met Anton's sympathetic smirk with a pleading look for help right before Harry finally yanked him out of the room and shut the door behind them with a loud, decisive bang.

They heard Draco's feet scuffling along the carpeted floors of the hallways as he was dragged further along by his necktie towards the opposite wing of the Manor. As soon as the married couple's loud bickering voices faded a couple of seconds later, Anton finally looked up and met Lucius' shocked, unblinking silver eyes with a pointed glare.

"Now THAT, Uncle Lucius, is precisely why I do NOT want to get married. Women…are just plain SCARY. Even unnaturally-made ones."

Lucius could only blink and nod back wordlessly in helpless agreement.


Wickham cleared his throat and looked over the table, smiling warmly at Jaimee and Draco's expectant faces. Observing the couple further, he noted Jaimee's definite five-month-old baby bump and the way Draco seemed to be resting his hand protectively over her stomach in silent comfort.

"Well now, Mistress Malfoy…It seems your twin sons are growing rather splendidly so far from what I can see here. Both of them are in excellent condition and should be due sometime around October 25-27." He began slowly, causing a rather boyish grin to light up Draco's face.

Pausing to take a sip from his mug of coffee, Wickham flicked over to the next page of Jaimee's health status report. "Also, you seem to have bumped up rather nicely. I suggest a couple of back and foot massages every now and then if you feel any discomfort from carrying the weight of your growing children in the months to follow." He told her comfortingly, aiming a pointed look at Draco as he spoke – to which Draco nodded easily in understanding.

"I'll do what I can to help her feel better—"

"I look like a bloody whale is what you mean, Wickham. Why don't you just say it outright, you coward?!" Jaimee snapped back irritably at the Head Healer, cutting off Draco's response and causing both her husband and Wickham to look at her scowling face in surprise.

"I beg your pardon, Mistress Malfoy?" Wickham asked uncertainly. Jaimee looked up at him again and answered his question with an angry, accusatory glare. She gestured pointedly to her baby bump and impatiently swatted her husband's hand right off.

"LOOK at me! I BLEW UP like a bloody balloon! I'm beginning to WADDLE so much that the Aurors in the Ministry are beginning to make fun of me!" She snapped again, turning around and aiming much of her anger at Draco's sheepishly laughing face.

"Oh you think that's FUNNY?! This is YOUR fault, you know! I should have known the minute I saw your bratty, sneering face in Madam Malkin's nine years ago that you'd do this to me!" She hissed at him, her eyes flashing dangerously when Draco answered her with a highly amused smirk.

"I highly doubt that's possible, Potter…How could you have 'known that I'd do this to you' when you were clearly a MAN at that time?" He pointed out with a smug smile, immediately flinching again right after when his wife answered him by aiming a painful punch at his shoulder.

"Bastard! How dare you talk back to me when I'm carrying your two sons?!"

"You can't use that excuse every time! That's bloody unfair, Potter!" Draco scowled, ignoring the way Wickham was clearing his throat to get their attention.

Harry narrowed her eyes at him and gave him an angry snarl. "Oh look at that, how hypocritical! Look at the mean, tough, cheating Slytherin complaining about his wife being unfair!" She mocked childishly, rolling her eyes and sticking her tongue out at Draco's glaring face.

"Why you stupid, asinine GryffinDORK! How DARE you talk to me like that?! I'm your husband and the father of your children and you will RESPECT me! Especially since I'm the only one who can protect you in your fragile state!" He hissed out, his full attention now on Harry's mocking sneer – the both of them completely unaware of the way Wickham was watching them in growing uncertainty.

"Master and Mistress Malfoy—"

"Tsss! PROTECT me?! You mean like the way you 'PROTECTED' yourself from that big bad HIPPOGRIFF in third year when it gave you a scratch on your arm and you SCREAMED like a little girl about how you were DYING?! Oh I feel SOOOO safe now, Malfoy!" Harry drawled sarcastically again, staring haughtily at him through her long lashes.

Draco's face reddened in angry humiliation. "That Hippogriff was a KILLER and it would have KILLED me had I not jumped back in self-defense! Is it MY fault that dangerous creatures just seem to take a bloody liking to YOU?! Forgive me if I'm normal like everyone else and don't go seeking danger like you, oh holy Wonder Boy of Gryffindor!" He growled back, now rising from his seat and glaring down at his wife's equally irate face.

"In case you haven't noticed, MALFOY…Do I LOOK like a bloody BOY to you now?!" She hissed at him, indicating irritably to her pregnant belly. Before Draco could snap out another response, Harry spoke up again and stood up with her chin held high, meeting her husband's glare easily.

"That's right…I DON'T! Because right now…THANKS TO YOU…I am bloody PREGNANT with YOUR twin sons, you pompous, arrogant prick! So don't you DARE try and patronize me, you miserable FERRET or I will throw you down a pit of Hippogriffs just to hear you SCREAM like a sissy little GIRL!" She screeched at him, baring her teeth and clenching her hands into fists.

Draco's eyes blazed with fury at her words and he stepped up to her so that their faces were mere inches apart. "Oh and THIS is all MY fault, Potter?! I'm not the only one responsible for this! It takes TWO to make a baby, SCAR-HEAD! Or does your pea-sized brain not comprehend that fact?!"

"Why you—"

"MASTER AND MISTRESS MALFOY!"

Both Harry and Draco blinked in turned their heads slowly to face Richard Wickham's exasperated grimace. The Head Healer was standing behind his table and was rubbing his temples as he watched them, the expression on his face one torn between amusement and frustration.

When neither Harry nor Draco seemed to be able to say anything to excuse their little outburst, Wickham spoke up for them and gave them both a calm smile. "If I may say so…Would it be alright if the both of you continue this little conversation in a more private setting? That way, we can proceed with Mistress Malfoy's examination?" He suggested pointedly, causing both younger adults to redden in embarrassment when they heard the hidden reprimand in his voice.

Realizing their mistake, both Malfoys mumbled incoherent apologies under their breaths and slowly sat back down onto their seats, pausing every now and then to throw each other disgruntled glares. Harry scowled and folded her hands across her chest while Draco rolled his eyes in annoyance.

Wickham hid a smile at both their childish behaviors and began to speak up again before another argument could start up. "Anyway…As I was saying…Since we're at the fifth month of your pregnancy, I'm going to recommend something to you that I recommend to all couples experiencing their first pregnancy." He began, quirking both of their interests as they looked up to meet his gaze.

Draco raised an eyebrow at him while Jaimee watched him with wide, curious eyes. Wickham chuckled and reached across the table, handing them two small pamphlets. As soon they read the words on the front page, both looked up at him with their eyebrows fused in confusion and simultaneously voiced out the question in their heads.

"…Lamaze classes??"


"Neville! Luna! What are you two doing here?!"

Great…I'm enjoying myself already. Draco thought sarcastically to himself, sneering as he watched Harry jump up from her seat beside him and race across the large assembly room to greet her two friends who had just appeared in the doorway.

Irritably tearing his eyes away from the annoying sight of Longbottom escorting a seven-month-pregnant Luna Lovegood into the room, Draco let his eyes wander halfheartedly around the area in bored inspection. Following Wickham's suggestion about a week ago, his mother had persuaded both Draco and Jaimee to attend one of the regularly conducted Lamaze classes held in one of St. Mungo's conference rooms – much to both their great reluctance.

Now, sitting smack in the middle of a room filled with happily gushing pregnant women and sickeningly indulgent husbands – at least in Draco's opinion – he found himself scowling heatedly at the front of the room, his arms crossed and his legs stretched out in front of him in languid, exaggerated boredom. He flicked his eyes back lazily to where Harry was still conversing with Neville, watching with a smirk as the two former Gryffindors exchanged friendly laughs and greetings. To Draco's further annoyance, Harry beckoned Neville over to sit beside them and – ignoring Draco's warning glare at her – led them over to where her scowling husband was seated.

Why did I ever marry a Gryffindor in the first place? I guess I had it coming. Draco thought to himself in irritation, rolling his eyes as Neville and Luna finally caught sight of him and offered him an uncertain, otherwise friendly smile. "Hey Malfoy…Long time no see." Neville greeted awkwardly as he took the seat on Draco's opposite side, cringing when all Draco did was sneer at him in response.

"Not long enough obviously—OW!" He glared at Harry as she sat down beside him, rubbing at the spot on his side where she had nudged him sharply with her elbow. Grumbling to himself, he turned to Neville and Luna's amused smiles and forced himself to nod politely in acknowledgment.

Luna shook her head in amusement at this and gave Harry a smile from where she sat three seats away from her beside Neville. "How far long are you now, Harry? I wasn't expecting to see you at a place like this. Especially with Malfoy over here…" She commented lightly, causing Draco to roll his eyes to himself and Harry to grimace slightly in agreement.

"Five months…Almost six. Yeah…I didn't expect to be here either. Narcissa practically forced us to come here today. She said it would do Draco some good to learn a bit about how to handle the situation when the baby arrives…In all honesty, I think this will be an educational experience for the both of us." She admitted grudgingly, earning an easy laugh from her friends.

"If it helps, Harry…This is my first pregnancy too so I'm just as nervous as you are. I'm nearly eight months pregnant now and I'm due end of August." Luna gestured to her much larger pregnant belly, smiling when Neville rewarded her with a kiss on the forehead in comfort.

"You're doing great, love…Just one more month and it'll all be over. I'll be right here at your side if you need anything" He promised her and the way his eyes had sparkled with such open love and sweet affection when he had said this brought a smile to Harry's lips as she watched them.

As though reading her thoughts, Luna looked up and smiled at her in agreement. "Neville's been really supportive throughout my entire pregnancy. It's been nothing but smooth sailing for us so far…What about you guys?" She peered curiously at Draco over Neville's shoulder, directing the conversation to the silently sulking former Slytherin for the first time since they had sat down.

Draco looked up at them and icily raised a single eyebrow. "Fan-bloody-tastic. Now what time is that stupid instructor supposed to get here?!" He forgot all about their question and turned his attention to the front of the assembly room, his lips curled into an impatient sneer.

Harry looked up and rolled her eyes at Neville and Luna's confused faces. "Don't worry about it you two…That's actually him being concerned. Trust me." She told them with a pointed smirk, earning an easy laugh from the other couple as they finally turned to talk to one another.

Within a couple of minutes, Luna turned to Neville and gave her husband a slightly apologetic glance. "Neville, could you please get me a glass of water? I'm feeling a little parched." She asked softly, smiling in gratitude when Neville stood up instantly and gave her a loving kiss on the cheek.

"Whatever you want, my darling…Wait here, I'll be back in ten minutes." He gave her another kiss on the forehead before he exited the room.

Completely oblivious to this little exchange, Harry had turned to Draco at that exact same moment and gave her scowling husband a beautiful smile. "'Co, do you mind fetching me some pumpkin juice before the instructor gets here?" She asked, her smile disappearing into a threatening snarl when Draco merely scoffed and rolled his eyes at her in annoyance.

"Get it yourself, Potter. I'm not your servant."

"Do you WANT me to pop your sons out for you, MALFOY?!"

"F—fine! No need to shout. Merlin…" Flinching at her furious glare and the way her green eyes had blazed dangerously in anger, Draco smiled nervously at her, bolted up from his seat and scurried out of the room – oblivious to the way Luna was muffling her amused giggles behind her hand.


"Alright everyone! Gather round! Gather round near the front over here! We're going to be starting our Lamaze session soon!"

It was about ten minutes after Draco and Neville had returned with their respective drinks that the instructor of the Lamaze class finally appeared – a short and pudgy middle-aged female healer by the name of Dorothy Greene – and gestured for them to stand up and walk over to the small, open area at the very front of the room.

Grumbling under his breath and grudgingly pulling himself out of his seat, Draco allowed Harry to lead him by the hand over to one of the large mats positioned in the corner of the area. He sat down onto the mat and pulled her easily onto his lap, smirking to himself when his wife immediately blushed in embarrassment at his ministrations and tried to pull away.

"Draco! Stop—"

"If I'm going to sit through one hour of this absolute rubbish, Harry, I might as well do it with you on my lap. Otherwise, I don't know how I'm going to last that long." He interrupted her pointedly, rolling his eyes at her reaction as he wrapped his arms firmly around her waist to lock her in place.

At the very front, Dorothy Greene stood up and gave them all a very bright smile – her eyes practically glowing with enthusiasm. "Good morning, my radiant little lovebirds! How is everyone this morning? Did you all get a good night's sleep?" She chirped again, causing both Draco and Harry to cringe to themselves in annoyance at the woman's amazingly high-pitched tone of voice.

Leaning in to whisper something into his wife's ear, Draco voiced his growing irritation in a low growl. "So help me, if she uses that annoyingly chirpy voice anywhere within a FOOT of me, I will TURN her into a 'radiant lovebird'!" He muttered, causing Harry's slim shoulder's to shake in laughter.

Turning her head to the side, she leaned back comfortably against him and answered him with a quirky grin. "You have to admit…This is certainly an experience that I never thought I'd ever share with YOU of all people." She murmured with a small smile, eliciting a reluctant chuckle from Draco as he leaned down again and answered her by dropping an affectionate kiss on her nape.

"Touché, Potter…"

"Now…Personally, I believe that a healthy delivery during pregnancy can only be achieved through a little phrase I like to call SHARING THE EXPERIENCE. Say it with me, everybody! Loud and clear like a mantra!" Dorothy Greene gestured cheerfully at them and swung her wand around as though conducting a choir. "On three now, everybody! One…Two…Three—"

"Sharing the experience!"

"I'd like to 'share the experience' of a nasty hex or jinx on her...Annoying, pint-sized chipmunk." Draco muttered darkly under his breath again so that only Harry could hear him, causing his wife to muffle another helpless laugh and elbow him lightly in admonishment.

"Come on, 'Co…I hate this thing as much as you do but we can at least try to learn from it…Especially since we both know nothing about pregnancy. SHARE the EXPERIENCE with me. " She teased, earning herself another highly disgruntled glare from her husband.

"Now…Our opening exercise for today deals with exactly that. SHARING THE EXPERIENCE. Say it with me one last time, please! I particularly want to hear the husbands say it out loud for me! On three now…ONE…TWO…THREE—"

"SHARING THE EXPERIENCE!"

Draco flinched irritably at the sound of the other men in the room saying the phrase out loud and clenched his hands into tight fists. "I'm going to march over there and shove a bloody blast-ended skrewt down her throat to shut her up." He growled angrily and this time, Harry rolled her eyes to herself – growing rather tired of her husband's behavior.

"Very good, everyone! Very good! Now…If you'll all look to your right…Just right beside the mat…You'll see that I've left something very important for the husbands to strap onto themselves." Dorothy stopped and smiled conspiratorially at them, giggling to herself as she watched the husbands around the room picking up the small bag beside their respective mats.

"Now I know what you're thinking…What you may find in that bag may be embarrassing at first but I assure you that this is necessary because what we're going to do now is to help all you husbands understand your wife better by feeling as PHYSICALLY VULNERABLE as she feels while carrying your child! As I said…It's all part of SHARING THE EXPERIENCE with each other!"

Within a couple of minutes after Dorothy had said this, the room was soon filled with gasps of horror and dismay from all the men. Looking over at his own bag beside their mat, Draco soon understood what had driven all the other husbands around them into such a frenzied state of panic.

Empting out the contents of the small bag, Draco found himself gaping in horror at what appeared to be a strap-on pregnant belly stuffed with sand – the sight of which caused Harry's eyes to widen comically for a split second before the former Gryffindor covered her mouth and promptly collapsed onto the mat in a useless pile of hysterical, wheezing laughter.

Draco's left eye twitched at this and he snapped his head to glare poisonously at his hysterically giggling wife, not at all appreciating the fact that she was laughing at his expense. Baring his teeth, he shoved the offending garment away and snarled at her in indignant anger.

"If you think I'm going to put that offensive thing on, Potter, you're CLEARLY mistaken! I am the HEAD of the Malfoy family and I will not submit myself to such ridiculous—"

"Is there a problem, Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy?" Dorothy's voice suddenly broke his angry tirade, causing both Draco and Harry to look up at the female healer's curious face as she peered down at them. The rest of the pregnant wives around the room were busy helping their husbands strap on their 'pregnant belly', much to Draco's dismay as he stood up and towered angrily over Dorothy's form.

"That's MASTER and MISTRESS Malfoy to you, you…TROLL! Do you honestly expect ME to put on this…this…VILE, DISGUSTING thing?! I could have you fired for this, do you know who I am?!" He raged indignantly, causing Harry to groan and bury her face into her hands in embarrassment.

To her surprise, Dorothy merely blinked up at Draco and answered him with a calm, knowing smile. "Ah yes, young Master Malfoy…Your mother warned me you might react this way. Unfortunately, I do not take kindly to threats…In fact, why don't you come with me to the front of the room and help me demonstrate to the class how we're to go about this little activity…?" Before Draco could blatantly refuse her request, she raised her wand and pointed it at him, magically strapping on the 'pregnant belly' onto his horrified, twitching form.

"BLOODY MERLIN'S BEARD! GET THIS THING OFF ME!"

Once again, Harry had to hold onto her sides as she broke down and cracked up laughing. She watched Dorothy drag her desperately struggling husband to the very front of the room with a simple binding and levitation spell, flicking her wand once over him to summon his wand to her before he could attempt to escape.

As soon as he was positioned into the center of the room – 'strapped-on pregnant belly and all'—Harry hid a smile and stood up from her mat to watch. She looked up and grinned when she saw Neville and Luna several feet away – the both of which were also laughing at the rare sight of Hogwarts' former Prince of Slytherin in such a compromising situation.

Draco, however, didn't seem to appreciate everyone's laughter and struggled furiously with the magical binds around him. "You miserable woman! I'll have you fired for such public displays of mockery! I will send the entire Wizengamot on your arse and then I'll—"

Dorothy ignored him and gestured cheerfully once more to the rest of the couples watching. "Gather round everyone! Stand up! I shall explain to you how we're going to go about this simple little activity! Mistress Malfoy, if you'll please join me over here please!" Dorothy gestured over for Harry to join her, smiling warmly as the Malfoy Mistress blinked and walked uncertainly to the front of the room to stand beside the female Healer.

Once she had done this, Dorothy grinned and wrapped an arm around the younger woman's shoulders, turning to face the watching couples surrounding them. "Now…This little activity is something I believe will help husbands understand their wives a little better. Mistress Malfoy…If you would please take this quill…" Jaimee shrugged and took the quill from Dorothy's hand, raising an eyebrow in mild curiosity as Draco continued to curse and struggle behind them.

"HARRY, I'M WARNING YOU! HELP ME TAKE THIS THING OFF RIGHT NOW OR I SWEAR—"

Dorothy gave the watching couples a conspiratorial wink before turning to Jaimee. "Now Mistress Jaimee…I want you to drop that quill a couple of feet in front of your husband…" She ordered, watching as Harry raised an eyebrow again before doing exactly what she said – watching as the quill plopped down onto the floor several feet away from Draco's shiny black, designer shoes.

After she had done this, Dorothy grinned and raised her wand again – pointing it at Draco's bound form. "Alright then…Now, Master Malfoy… I'm going to let you go now. Please refrain from running away and listen to what I have to tell you, is that understood?" She asked carefully, waiting until Draco snarled at her in utter dislike before she removed the magical binds on him completely.

The irate Malfoy Head flushed bright red in humiliation and he would have yanked off his strapped-on pregnant belly immediately had Dorothy spoke up again and directed his attention to her loud voice. "Master Malfoy, the activity is simple…All you have to do…Is to pick up that quill exactly as you think your wife would…With that pregnant belly strapped on you and all. Simple and easy, don't you think so? That's all you have to do and you can take that off." She told him simply, watching with a small smirk as Draco blinked at her in disbelief.

Raising a suspicious eyebrow, he glared back at Jaimee's amused smile over Dorothy's shoulder before flicking his eyes down at the quill on the floor. "That's all? I pick up that stupid quill and you'll leave me the hell alone?" He asked, sneering when Dorothy nodded at him in agreement.

"You have my word, Master Malfoy…Just pick up that quill exactly the way your wife would."

Still glaring distrustfully at her, Draco cursed darkly under his breath and was about to bend down with his strapped-on belly to pick up the quill when an idea struck him. He stopped midway – looking up and meeting both Dorothy and Jaimee's watching eyes with a charming, devious smile.

"So let me make sure I understand this activity correctly. You want me to pick up that quill, as if I were pregnant, exactly the way my wife would? As in…If I were her?" He drawled slowly, his eyes gleaming mischievously that Jaimee felt her own eyes narrowing in suspicion when she recognized the Slytherin smirk on her husband's handsome face.

Dorothy nodded and smiled cheerfully again, looking up and giving the other watching couples a nod of encouragement. "Yes, Master Malfoy… Exactly the way your wife would. That way…All of the men in this room can learn to appreciate the hardships your wives go through." She explained, much to the disgruntled grumbling of most of the other husbands around the room.

When she turned back to look at Draco however, she was surprised to find that instead of bending down as she expected, the Malfoy Head was smirking smugly at his wife's glaring face. To Harry's utter disbelief – and the amusement of many men in the room – Draco arched an eyebrow, lifted a single hand and pointed in an exaggeratingly demure manner to the quill on the floor.

He feigned a ridiculously whiny version of what he meant to be Jaimee's high-pitched, feminine voice and shot her a smile while pretending to flutter his eyelids at her.

"Oh Draaaaaaaco….My breasts are starting to hurt again! Can you pick up that quill for me…PLEEEEEEEEEEASE?"

A gasp of insult escaped Harry's lips and she felt her eyes narrowing slowly into very tiny slits, her entire vision swarming with RED.

"I DO NOT SOUND LIKE THAT, MALFOY!"

Deaf to the amused laughter of all the other couples in the room – including Dorothy, Neville and Luna's – Harry clenched her hands angrily into tight fists, bared her teeth and let out a snarl of anger. She launched herself at her husband's form – immediately causing Draco's eyes to widen as he stopped laughing, let out a high-pitched, nervous yelp and ducked as she jumped at him.

"MALFOY, YOU POMPOUS, ARROGANT, INSENSITIVE, FERRET-FACED BRAT! I'M GOING TO SKIN YOU ALIVE AND FEED YOU TO A HIPPOGRIFF!"

Draco offered her a nervous smile and ducked once more as Harry tried to punch him again. "I—it was a JOKE, love! A JOKE! Hahaha…C—come on, everyone else seemed to think it was funny! Don't you—YARGH!" Draco cut off the rest of his sentence as he whirled around and began running as fast as humanely possible towards the exit – the strapped-on pregnant belly still attached to his form and his angry, snarling wife right at his heels.


"Draco, I'd like to talk to you about something rather important now…" Wickham began as he finally set the folders in his hand down on his desk. He peered at Draco's seated form from across his table, smiling kindly when Draco raised both his eyebrows at him in question.

"I'm not about to take another Lamaze class, Wickham…" He sneered irritably at him, causing the Head Healer to chuckle in amusement but shake his head. "That's not what I meant, Master Malfoy…You see… It concerns your wife and about her pregnancy." He paused and hid a knowing smile when Draco straightened up in his seat and leaned in closer to listen to him.

Clearing his throat, Wickham folded his hands neatly on the table and chose his next words carefully. "Your wife is…How should I say it…She's at that period in her pregnancy right now where she might be feeling exceptionally vulnerable at certain times…Insecure…Unstable…"

Draco looked confused at this but nodded for him to continue, his eyebrows fused together as he pondered the Head Healer's words. "What I mean is…She may feel more emotionally fragile than usual in her current state. Especially since she may start feeling the babies' movements inside her any day now…" Draco's eyes grew wide at this but Wickham continued before he could say anything.

"Just…Just be sure to look after her well-being. Not just physically, I mean… But also emotionally…Do you understand what I mean, Draco?" He looked up and was genuinely surprised to see a gentle look of understanding dawning in Draco's normally cold silver eyes.

"I understand."


"Ugh…Mmmm… Oh god…OH GOD…"

A strangled moan of release escaped Draco's half-open lips. He clenched his eyes shut and exploded inside his utterly insatiable wife's body for the third time that night, his entire form shuddering violently in pleasure. He clutched tightly onto her hips, holding her down against his body as he rode out the final waves of his climax.

As he emptied himself inside her, he leaned up and caught her lips in a sweet kiss – smiling weakly when Jaimee easily melted against him and wrapped her arms tighter around his neck. Pulling away, she finally collapsed on top of him; exhausted after she had practically ridden him for nearly two hours straight that night in the heat of their passionate activities.

Feeling sweaty and completely drained of all energy, Draco closed his eyes and wrapped his arms lazily around her slender frame – one of his hands going to rest itself protectively – almost instinctively – on her stomach. Keeping his arms wrapped around her, he pushed her gently to the side so that she lay beside him, her cheek nestled comfortably against his chest.

"Mmmm…That was really good, 'Co…Thank you." Harry murmured lazily as she leaned over and rewarded him with a kiss on his cheek, chuckling to herself when all Draco could do to answer her was to give her a half-hearted, exhausted nod and an incoherent grumble in response.

When he couldn't seem to say anything else for a couple more minutes, Harry smirked to herself and grabbed her wand from the nightstand beside their four poster bed – flicking it once over the room to dim the lights and to pull the bed's blankets over their exhausted, naked forms.

Draco mumbled another incoherent 'thank you' at this and turned over to his side, burying his face into his pillow and beginning to fall into a heavy sleep. Harry scowled slightly at this and sidled up closer to him, nudging him gently with her elbow to stir him back into consciousness.

"…..Wha…? Whashwrong, Harry…?"

"Are you going to sleep right away, 'Co…? I just…I wanted to talk to you about something." Harry began uncertainly, biting her lip and watching as her husband shifted lazily under the covers and involuntarily let out a sleepy, exhausted yawn.

Forcing his eyes open, Draco yawned again and tried to stretch himself out – cringing in pain about a second later when he felt the unwelcome soreness brought about by their continuous 'nighttime activities' for the past week seeping into the muscles of his body.

"Merlin's beard… I'm completely sore from the waist down…I can't even feel my crotch." He kidded weakly, squinting sleepily up at the canopy of their bed despite the comforting darkness of their large bedroom in Godric's Hollow. Harry turned over her side to look at him in concern. "Why? What's wrong?" She asked, raising herself up on one elbow and peering over him.

In spite of himself, Draco opened his eyes again and looked up into her beautiful face – managing a sleepy, though slightly affectionate, glare. "Gee… I don't know…Let's see, Potter…Maybe it's because you just rode me for nearly two full hours straight?" He drawled teasingly, chuckling to himself when she blushed at his words and buried her face against his chest.

"I'm sorry…I'm not normally so insatiable like this. I think it's all those hormones this pregnancy has been bringing to me. I'm…Really sorry I've been doing nothing but tire you out." She said uncertainly, pulling herself back up and giving him an apologetic grimace.

Draco closed his eyes sleepily again but a teasing smile remained on his face as he reached up and pulled her back down against him so her face was buried against his neck. "Don't worry about that, love…If I could, I'd want to be in you every second of my life but unfortunately, the physical limitations of my human body prevent me from doing so and require that I get at least three hours of rest every now and then." He kidded lightly, feeling her shaking slightly with laughter against him.

"…Weakling."

"…Bitch."

Harry chuckled again at their familiar exchange and snuggled herself closer against him, closing her eyes and inhaling his familiar scent. "'Co…I really do want to ask you something though…Do you mind staying awake for just a couple of minutes longer?" She asked meekly and in spite of himself, Draco couldn't prevent a soft, fond laugh from escaping his lips.

Forcing one of his eyes open, he peered at his wife's beautiful face – inwardly admiring the way her long, bed-tossed hair fell into sexy, carefree curls. Sighing, he finally opened his other eye and gave her a sleepy smirk, reaching up to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"You know it's moments like these that I wish you were a man again, Potter…Men don't need to talk after sex and yet, you're actually demanding a 'pillow talk' session with me. You really are a woman now aren't you?" He teased her gently, reaching over and absentmindedly caressing her cheek.

His words caused her to blink in surprised realization before she laughed and shook her head at herself in amazement. "Merlin's beard, you're right…I never thought about it that way." She thought out loud, blushing lightly as she shifted so that she could rest her cheek on his chest.

He stroked her hair again in response, his other hand instinctively moving to caress her six-month-old baby bump. "Well…? What is it, Harry? Ask me already so I can go to sleep. I'm exhausted and we both still have work tomorrow morning." He murmured sleepily, waiting as his wife seemed to hesitate for several seconds before finally speaking up in a soft, embarrassed voice.

"I have a very serious question for you, okay…? I want you to answer me as HONESTLY and TRUTHFULLY as you can…" She began, a slight warning tone in her voice that brought another amused smirk to his lips. "I'm a SLYTHERIN, Harry. Those two words you just emphasized don't even belong in my general vocabulary." He kidded in response, wincing a second later when he was answered by his wife's irritated light punch to his arm.

"Quit being a prick, Draco! I'm SERIOUS—"

"Fine, fine…I'll stop teasing. What is it, Harry?"

Laughing, he finally relented and opened both his eyes again, shifting his position so that he lay down on his side to face her troubled features. Harry was biting her lip and was absentmindedly tracing circles along his chest, struggling desperately for the next words to say.

Then, to Draco's utter surprise, she looked down at her pregnant belly again, scowling darkly before looking back up at him to give him an accusatory glare.

"…….Do you think I'm…FAT?"

"……………"

Draco's eyes widened to comical proportions when he heard this and he blinked rapidly at her as though she had grown an extra head. Harry was looking right back at him with such a tense, anxious expression on her beautiful features that Draco wished he could have prevented the way the corners of his lips began tugging upwards into an involuntary grin.

Swallowing his surprised laughter, he forced his answer out in a steady tone of voice. "Er…I—I'm sorry, Harry….I think I just hallucinated for a second there…Uhm…What?" His eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets as he watched his pregnant wife's eyes begin to fill slowly with tears. She scowled again and gestured miserably to her pregnant belly.

"I ASKED…Do you think I'm FAT, Draco?! Do you still find me as sexually attractive as you did before?" Her voice broke off briefly as a soft sob escaped her lips but she forced herself to continue, grabbing a blanket and throwing it self-consciously over her naked body.

"Look at me! I look like such a bloody WHALE now and I know that the reason you keep running away from me all the time is probably because you don't want me anymore a—and—"

To her mortification, her startled husband suddenly buried his face into his pillow and burst out laughing, his shoulders shaking in hilarity and his chuckles echoing in the silence of their bedroom.

"Ahahahahaha! Oh Merlin's beard, my sides….The great Wizarding hero, Harry Potter, asking me if she's FAT…Hahahaha! That's priceless!" Draco's voice shook with mirth as he tried to control his laughter, turning to his side again to look at the expression on his wife's face.

Unfortunately, Harry didn't appreciate his reaction and gave him a wounded glare, her eyes tearing even more in self-conscious embarrassment. Feeling insulted and completely humiliated, she wrapped the blanket tighter around her naked form and bolted up from the bed – her cheeks burning red in anger as she made to storm out of the room.

Draco realized his mistake immediately. His laughter died out and he stood up hastily to chase after her, smiling affectionately as he stopped her from walking out of the room by wrapping his arms firmly around her waist from behind. When she struggled angrily against him, he leaned down and comforted her by planting reassuring kisses onto her nape.

She continued to remain tense in his arms as he chuckled again and turned her around gently to face him, titling her chin up so she was glaring angrily at his impish grin. "Hey, I'm sorry…I wasn't laughing at you, love…" He laughed gently again and reached up to tap her affectionately on her nose. "Y—you just startled me, that's all…I wasn't expecting you to ask me such a ridiculous question like that…I'll stop laughing." He told her, still smiling as she attempted to push him away.

"I'm not TRYING to be funny, Draco! I'm serious!" She walked back over to their bed and sat down onto the edge, wrapping her arms around herself in a gesture of self-protection. Draco walked back over to her – obviously unconcerned about his unclothed state – and sat down beside her.

Turning to face him, Harry's cheeks darkened further and she swallowed the lump in her throat. "Y—you've always told me before how much you liked my body…Blimey, as a former man, I'VE always understood why you liked my body so much. And now that I…I look like this—" She gestured miserably to her baby bump again. "—I—I can't help but feel that I—I'm not as physically attractive to you as I was before and that I—I—"

She was cut off quite abruptly when a smirking Draco had leaned in and caught her trembling lips in a deep, passionate kiss, his hands snaking up behind her and pointedly yanking off the blankets she had wrapped around her form. She protested sharply when he did this and pulled away from him shock. "H—hey! Draco, give me back that blanket!" She tried to reach around him for it but Draco held the sheet out of her reach, smirking smugly and hurling the blanket to the other side of the room.

When she gave up and chose to wrap her arms helplessly around herself again in an effort to cover her nakedness up, Draco sighed dramatically and pulled her against him so that she was sitting on his lap. She blushed heavily at this and tried to pull away fro him but he held her firmly in place, another low, amused chuckle escaping his lips.

"Blimey, Potter…You really are beginning to sound more and more like a real born woman each day. Sometimes I wish you would just shut up." He teased, reaching up and brushing the hair out of her face so that he could look intently into her bright green eyes.

She looked at him in confusion. "Wh—what do you mean? A—are you making fun of me again, Malfoy because I swear if you are, I'll—" Draco shook his head and silenced her by placing a finger to her lips, cutting off the rest of her poorly formed threat. When she looked as though she was going to speak up again, Draco beat her to it and rewarded her with a handsome, lazy smile.

"Let me explain something very important to you, Potter…" He pushed her gently onto her back on the bed, ignoring her embarrassed protests as he leaned down and began to place gentle, adoring kisses onto her stomach. "I have not been running away from you because I don't want you anymore…I don't know WHAT gave you that stupid idea but it's the most moronic thing you have ever said." He drawled bluntly, still ignoring her embarrassment as he trailed his kisses upward from her stomach along her body until he was kissing and biting along her breasts.

"Who are you calling a moron, Malfoy—"

He spoke on as though he hadn't heard her. "The only reason I have been running away from you these past few weeks is because I was TIRED and I didn't want to make love to you if I couldn't do it with my full strength and physical capacity…" He paused at this and looked up, meeting the confused look on her face. "I want to make sure I satisfy you every single time…You deserve nothing less than the best I can give you…You do know that, right?" He asked gently, pulling away and reaching up to brush the hair out of her face again.

She nodded wordlessly in response, her throat too dry to speak as she watched him lean down again and begin to lavish even more heated kisses all over her body. "And as to the question of whether or not I think you're fat…Well…Let me put it this way instead, Potter…" He chuckled and trailed his hands adoringly all over her slim feminine curves.

"You…are carrying my children inside this beautiful…gorgeous…luscious body…" He leaned down again and followed the trail his hands had made with his lips instead, eliciting several soft moans from his wife. "Think about it from a guy's perspective – the most exquisitely beautiful and the sexiest woman in the world…carrying MY children inside her…Proclaiming to the world that she is the mother of MY children…Letting the whole world know that she belongs completely and utterly to me and no one else…" Draco stopped and looked up to meet her warm, beautiful green eyes.

Seeing her smiling reluctantly up at him, he smirked and bent his head down to nip and suck gently at the red love bites already on her neck. "I think THAT…More than anything…is without a doubt the sexiest…the most erotic thing I have ever seen…" He bit suggestively at the skin just below her ear, sending pleasurable shivers running up and down her spine.

He finally pulled back up so that he was looking down directly at her face – silently admiring her achingly lovely features and the unmistakable tenderness in her eyes.

"I can honestly say…with absolute certainty…That I have never wanted you more, Harry…"

The corners of his lips quirked upwards into a teasing smile when she blushed heatedly at his words, shaking her head at him in helpless disbelief. Reaching her hands up to wrap them around his nape, she pulled him back down so that their foreheads rested against each other.

"God, I should cut out your tongue, Malfoy…Now I know why so many girls preferred you over me back in school. You have such a skill with words, don't you?" She teased in a soft whisper, laughing when Draco answered her by rolling his eyes and letting out a scoff of derision.

"It's not my fault you were a stuttering, clumsy and ineloquent idiot who didn't know how to talk to women back then, Potter…If I may say so, you're still a stuttering, clumsy and ineloquent idiot now. You can't even think of proper creative names to call me anymore other than 'ferret-face' and 'bastard'." He mocked lightly, earning a growl and light punch from her to his arm.

"I can too!"

"Prove it!"

"You stupid…Slimy…Slytherin." She finished lamely and in spite of herself, she joined Draco in his laughter. He collapsed back down onto the bed beside her and pulled the blankets over both their bodies. Just as she had snuggled her cheek back against his chest and was about to close her eyes, Draco folded his hands behind his head and spoke up again, his eyes glazed over in deep thought.

"Speaking of name calling…Have you been thinking about possible names for our two sons yet…?" He asked idly, causing Harry to open her eyes in surprise and tilt her head upwards to look at him in question. Draco blinked and looked down at her, raising his eyebrow in query.

"Uhm…No? We still have three more months to think about it, 'Co. Do you have any ideas?" She asked him curiously and at that, Draco smirked and rolled his eyes at her question.

"Of course I do, Potter! It's actually a custom in my family that the firstborn son take his father's name as his second name, did you know that?" He asked, idly playing with her long hair. Harry scoffed and answered in a laughing voice. "Draco Lucius Malfoy…Anton Louis Malfoy…Lucius Lawrence Malfoy…I think I pretty much got the gist of it, Draco." She answered sarcastically.

"Touché, Harry JAMES Potter."

"Shut up, Malfoy."

Still smirking, Draco raised an eyebrow and tilted his head as he pondered on his next thought. "I actually have several suggestions for you regarding possible first names for them…I'll run them by you right now and you can tell me which of them you like best alright?" He asked and Harry frowned slightly at this, fusing her eyebrows in mild disagreement.

"But what if I don't like any of the names? Do I just say 'no'?"

"You can't not like the names I chose! They're perfect! I chose them!"

"Somehow, I highly doubt that, Malfoy." Came her deadpan, unimpressed response.

"Shut up, Potter. Just listen! I'll run them by you once and you can tell me which one of those you'd like best for our two sons."

"Well I think it's only fair that I get five 'vetoes' if I don't like them. That way I can knock off the names I don't like from future consideration."

"No way, Harry."

Harry scowled at him and narrowed her eyes threateningly in warning. "Say no to me again and I'm not popping these children out, so help me Merlin."

"Tssssss. Fine! THREE vetoes, Potter…Just THREE. Now shut up and listen." Draco grumbled, going over the mental list of names in his head.

"Alexander."

"VETO! Tsss. Unoriginal much? Somehow I KNEW that name was going to be on that list."

Draco growled at her and scowled up at the ceiling of their four-poster bed, shifting irritably under the blankets. Harry smirked at him, snuggling herself contentedly against her pillow.

"Oh shut up! How about…Sebastian?"

"VETO! Am I having twin SONS or twin CRABS, Malfoy?"

Draco's eyebrows rose up in utter confusion at her words and he turned slightly to his side to glare at her. "Twin crabs?! What the bloody hell are you talking about, Potter?"

"Uhm…Nothing. Just a Muggle reference. What's next on your list?"

"Uhm…Aha! I got it! It's the perfect name! Orion! Orion Draco Malfoy!" Draco smirked at her in triumph, only to scowl moments later when Harry simply cocked an eyebrow at him and answered him with a mocking, derisive sneer.

"Draco, WHY do you hate our children? VETO! Look, I know your parents were big on the whole constellation names but I'd rather not name my sons after balls of gas in the sky." She answered sarcastically and at this, Draco finally growled and narrowed his eyes angrily at her.

"Bloody hell, Potter! You're such an annoying, fussy little git! If you're so clever with names, why don't YOU think of a good name then?!" He challenged irritably and at this, Harry's face broke out into a grin, her green eyes twinkling mirthfully at him.

"Don't mind if I do…Actually, I already have a good idea for a name for our firstborn son. Wait for it…Wait for it…Jerkov." She held back a laugh when Draco's head snapped back and he glared at her as though she was the dumbest, most insignificant person on the planet.

"JERKOV?! What in Merlin's – what kind of a ridiculous peasant name is THAT, Potter?! Are you PURPOSELY trying to get my son bullied in school?" He raged, failing to notice the way Harry's shoulders were shaking with laughter and the way she was hiding her smile behind her hand.

"I think it's the PERFECT name, Draco .Just listen to this…JERKOV DRACO MALFOY. Doesn't that just sound dashing?" A snort of laughter escaped her lips again as Draco's eyebrows fused together in utter confusion. "That's not dashing! What are you talking about?! Are you insane—"

"No, no…Just listen to it again! JERKOV DRACO MALFOY…As in…JERK—OFF DRACO MALFOY…" Draco's face suddenly dawned in belated realization at her intended pun. Just as he sneered angrily and was about to whip out an angry, sarcastic retort, Harry buried her face into her pillow, tossed the blanket over herself and collapsed into another fit of hysterical laughter.

He glared at her for several moments, his eye twitching in irritation but after awhile, his own amusement gave in and he allowed a small smile – his own shoulders beginning to shake in barely muffled laughter. "Harry, you git! That was such a lame joke." He raised a hand and slapped her affectionately on her arse, causing her to squeal in indignation but otherwise laugh harder.

"Oh yeah…? Then why are you laughing, Malfoy?" She asked him pointedly and at this, Draco couldn't help grinning again and whacking her laughing form over the head with his pillow. When their hilarity had subsided, she snuggled against him again and they fell into another comfortable silence – listening contentedly to the other's soft, rhythmic breathing.

Just as Draco yawned and his eyelids began to close heavily in exhaustion, he heard Harry gasp and felt her jerk sharply in his arms. In panic, his eyes snapped open and he immediately sat up, peering worriedly at her. Harry's eyes had grown wide and her hands clutched her stomach in shock.

"What is it? What's wrong? What hurts?" Draco rushed out, his eyes roaming anxiously over her pale features. Instead of answering him, Harry sat up slowly and raised a finger in an indication of silence, the shocked expression on her face slowly transforming into one of stunned elation.

"M—Merlin's beard…" She gasped out loud again, a surprised, ecstatic laugh escaping her lips as she flicked her eyes up at him and gave him a wide, beautiful smile. Draco arched a single eyebrow and stared at her, blinking at her in confusion.

"What—"

"Th—they kicked! I—I felt them kick! H—Haha! Oh gods, I—I'm a mother!" She laughed weakly and grabbed her husband's hand, placing it over her bare stomach and indicating for him to remain still. The frown on Draco's face quickly became an endearingly boyish grin and he placed his other hand on her stomach as well – his worry and sleepiness completely forgotten.

He had to wait a couple more minutes of silence before he actually understood what she meant and the minute he did – feeling the definite kick of either one of his two sons from his wife's pregnant belly – Draco felt his an unexplainable urge of giddy happiness welling up in his chest.

Flicking his eyes up to look at Jaimee's smiling face, Draco felt himself smiling back widely at her like a lovesick idiot – his left dimple in clear view as he leaned down and pressed his lips against hers in a loving kiss. Pulling back, he leaned down and placed two kisses onto her stomach – laughing when he felt his ministrations immediately reciprocated by two powerful kicks from his sons.

Meeting his wife's bright green eyes once more, he felt an overwhelming ache of tenderness in his chest. He raised a hand and gently traced the lightning bolt-shaped scar on her forehead, trailing his fingers all the way down until he was cupping her soft cheek.

"I love you so much…"

She smiled and leaned into his touch, reaching her own hand up and placing it over the one he had on her cheek. "I love you too…" She whispered back, guiding his fingers over to her lips and giving each one a reverent kiss. When she leaned back against him and they both lay back down onto the bed, Draco slid his arm around her waist and pulled her tightly against him with a small smile.

"Hmm…Suddenly I'm feeling a little frisky, Potter…I think I'm just about up for tonight's round four…" He suddenly drawled in a low, suggestive whisper a couple of minutes later, earning a surprised laugh from his wife as she glanced at the clock on the table beside their bed.

"Draco, it's TWO in the morning and we have to get up soon. Are you serious?"

He gave her a wolfish, feral smirk and answered her question by chuckling and pointedly yanking the covers back up over their heads.


A/N: Ah, marital bliss… *sigh* Don't you all wish we're all lucky enough to find it? :D Just a short disclaimer…As much as I'd like to take credit for the Lamaze class scene…Unfortunately, that wasn't original. That was actually based on a very popular Lamaze joke, I'm not sure if some of you already heard it. In any case, I thought it'd be interesting to incorporate into the story. ;) Hope you all enjoyed the fluffy scene here because we're back to insane hilarity in the next chapter! *evil cackle*

To those concerned, I will probably show more of Byron and Anton's love lives just before I go into the time lapse. Sometime before and after Jaimee gives birth in Chapter 9. ;)

Next Chapter: The FINAL trimester, shopping for baby stuff in Diagon Alley, and Harry's magical fluctuations begin. (Weeee! Fun fun fun!)

PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW! :D