Next day Aiden and me were shooting some hoops when I kept seeing Spencer glance over from her picnic table where she works with her student, Isabel. I look at her, she looks away, and I look back, Thinking, watching her but not staring. I see her stand and go in the direction of the drama club, knowing it was time for rehearsal I followed suit.
From stage right, Spencer makes her entrance as Lizzie. A collective gasp from the audience. She was wearing makeup, a dress that clings, her hair pulled back. I can't take my eyes off her.
(As Lizzie) "Morning, Pop. Boys. I dreamed we had a rain, rain coming down in sheets! Lightning flashed, thunder rolled up and down the canyon like a kid with a big drum!" ignoring the laughter from my so-called friends she continued "I know why you sent me to Sweet River. There were six boys in that family. The first three days, I stayed in my room."
(Boy playing Noah, the brother) "What'd you do that for?"
The play continued as I watched her, nearing my scene. I step to onto the stage trying to get into my role as Starbuck. I look Spencer straight in her bright blue eyes.
"You'll look in that mirror and you'll be more than pretty. You'll be beautiful. Look at me. Tell me what you see!"
"Is it really me?" Her face was lovely, her eyes shining, radiating, and looking directly at me. I felt a strange longing for it to be real and not part of the play.
"'Yes…you're beautiful." I meant it.
I changed the line and nailed it, surprising myself. Surprising her. At that moment I knew we both knew it was sincere. A moment passes. I felt my stomach churn with anticipation.
I leant in. She closed her eyes as our lips met in a kiss. It was gentle and soft but full of meaning, more importantly it was genuine. When Spencer opened her eyes, they are filled with tears.
The curtain crashes down to mark the end of the scene.
There was clapping from the other side of the curtain. I tried to meet Spencer's gaze but she was looking at the floor.
I heard someone shout my name and turned to see my misfit dad, dressed from head to toe in black, piercings, tattoos and chains hanging off him. That's the rock and roll look though isn't it? I think he looks like an idiot but that's what you get when your from a really world famous rock band like purple venom.
"Fine performance." Like he watched it.
"Who invited you?" I said venomously.
"Ed Kelly. I thought we might get a bite –"
I cut him off "Not hungry."
I moved towards my car hearing him shout after me. "Ashley! Please. Don't walk away from me."
"Like you walked away from us?" Enraged I got into my car and drove off. No way was I forgiving him, he walked out, left us for some life as a big major rock star. How could he do that to his own family? I fell to sleep thinking about all that happened today and the kiss, god that kiss…
At school I approached my friends and over heard them saying about Spencer calling her a puritan and that she had mutant ideas.
"She's not. She's got her own ideas." It had slipped out but I'm glad it did. I saw them exchange a look as if to say am I defending her? Aiden took me to the side.
"Kelly is telling everyone that kiss was real." He said shocked.
"It was." I wasn't going to lie.
Aiden smirked in disbelief. That you're scamming on Spencer Carlin?"
"Scamming is a strong word." I wasn't going to deny it either. I walked away over to Spencer's locker.
Waiting when Spencer approached her locker. Her hair pulled back. She looks good in a simple, fresh way.
"You weren't in school yesterday." I didn't mean for it to sound like I was accusing but I think it kind of did.
"I went to the doctor with my father." Her face showed her concern.
"He okay?" I didn't like the guy but I didn't wish bad things for him. Or her.
"Healthy as can be."
Pause. She opens her locker, gets what she needs.
"You were great the other night."
"Thank you. So were you." She was unusually quiet.
Pause. I reached out to try to tuck her stray hair away from her face but she ducked.
"I haven't been nice to you."
"You're hardly nice to anyone."
"I'm sorry." I looked in her eyes and tried to show her how sincere I was being.
"I wish I could believe you." She said while walking away. Damn, this was frustrating.
I followed her to the cafeteria where Spencer sat alone reading, wearing her old brown sweater. My friends call to me but I ignore them and put my tray down on her table and sit. Making a public statement. She looked up her eyes burning into mine.
"People can see."
"And that would ruin your reputation how?"
She goes back to her book. Ignoring me.
"What's that?" Trying to start a conversation with her.
She doesn't look up she just shows me the spine: The Scarlet Letter.
"That on your 'Life List.' To read all these books?"
She doesn't deny it. I just dive in. "Spencer. Maybe I want to try being positive." She looks up examining my face for the truth. I had to tell her, be honest for once. "Maybe I miss doing that dumb play with you. Maybe you inspire me."
"That sounds like horseshit."
"It's not." I said earnestly.
"Prove it." She picks up her books and tray. Everyone was watching.
I followed Spencer out of the building. Catching up. "Spencer…"
"You lack honour. You lack compassion. You lack honesty. You lack humanity. You don't know the first thing about being someone's friend" Talk about a blow to the ego.
"I don't want to be just your friend!" She turned to face me looking into my eyes as if searching for something.
"You don't know what you want"
"I want you!" I practically screamed. "You know what I think your scared, scared that I might actually like you, because then you couldn't hide behind your books and your telescope and your sweater and your God."
She gets into her car. Slams the door and drove off.
