"Wake up, baby," I could feel him kissing my neck and rubbing his hands up and down my body. Stopping only to squeeze my ass every few stokes. "Ana…"
I turn towards him, opening my eyes and staring into my soul mate, "Good morning, handsome." I say, reaching out to rest my hand on his chest.
"Good morning, baby. Did you sleep well?" I nod and nuzzle into him, kissing along his jaw line.
"How'd you sleep baby? You didn't come to bed until late…" I look up at him and he's smiling. "What are you smiling about?"
"I'm just obsessed with how you unknowingly remind me every single morning how much I love you, and how lucky I am to be able to wake up next to a goddess every morning."
I blush and turn away; he always says the right words to make me feel so right inside. So wanted. He grabbed me and pulled me in closer, "Don't turn away from me Anastasia, I thought we talked about your self doubt?"
"I know, I know. I'm sorry, you just make me feel so good when you tell me how you feel and I guess sometimes I just don't get what you see in me. But, I promise, again."
He rolls on top of me, spreading my knees with his legs and leaning down on his elbows he starts to kiss the valley in between my breasts. "Anastasia…you are so beautiful. Do you know that?" I mumble an incoherent answer, leaning up to kiss his shoulder and he immediately pulls back.
I look at him with confusion, "What…?"
"I asked you a question," he leans forward so I am flat on my back again and I can feel his hard cock rubbing right at my entrance. Dear god, this man is going to be the death of me. "Do you need me to ask you again?"
"No, I don't need you to ask me again. Because I will always hear what you have to say to me, Christian." I grab his face and look him right in the eyes, "…and yes, baby, I do understand you. Now fuck me before I change my mind!"
He slams into me at my words and stays there. Filling me to the hilt, making my hips move for some sort of friction. He places his hand on my left hip to hold me in place while he is still full inside me. "Mine. This is mine, Ana and you are beautiful." He starts to move and I quiver underneath him because it feels so damn good. This man has me captured mind, body and soul.
After losing ourselves in each other twice this morning we take extra-long hot showers and then meet in the kitchen for breakfast and then we are off to work.
"Ana, Dr. Greene is on the phone," Hannah says through the intercom.
"Thank you, Hannah, put her through." I grab the receiver and wait for Dr. Greene to come on the line. "Yes, Dr. Greene, this is Ana, what can I do for you?"
"I am doing well, Ana, thank you." She pauses for a moment, "I was just wondering if you were planning on coming in to see me anytime soon…?"
I stop my multitasking focus on what she just said, "Uh…I'm sorry you have me at a bit of a disadvantage. I was just into see you last month."
"Ana, I hate to do this over the phone but you missed our last appointment two weeks ago… I didn't know if you just changed doctors or found other methods of birth control."
"Dr. Greene, I'd like to come in as soon as possible actually. I haven't been using other birth control and there is no way I changed doctors," Christian would kill me.
"Alright, Ana, if you can come in around 3 than we'd be able to do a quick pregnancy test."
"Okay, I'll see you then." I hang up and pick my phone up to call Christian - wait... Should I call him? What if it is just a false alarm? I can't be pregnant, can I?
That would ruin everything.
I make my way out to the SUV waiting by the curb with sawyer tailing behind me, "Do we have a deal? Not to say a word about this to Christian?"
"Yes, ma'am." He said in a monotone.
As we drive the Dr. Greene's office, I can't help but to be extremely nervous. When we arrive and I go into the exam room, I have a total out of body experience, like I am seeing everything from the outside. Dr. Greene comes in and gives me a sideways smile, like she already knows. Oh god.
"Alright, Ana, are you ready?"
I look at her and nod my head; no words can come out of my mouth.
The nurse takes my blood and leaves the room telling me to be patient and to change into the dressing gown that she left. I change and I know I'm shaking because I can hear the rattle of the paper against my skin.
"Alright, let's do an ultrasound and see if we see any movement. This going to be cold at first." She rubs the gel on my stomach and I try to control my breathing. She can obviously tell I'm freaking out because she grabs my hand gives it a tight squeeze.
"It looks like you're pregnant," she says; everything else she has said gets drowned out by white noise. I'm pregnant. Christian and I are pregnant.
Oh no, Christian.
"I have to go..." I move to get up and start to take off the cover she gave me to put my clothes on. "I'll make sure I get the prescriptions filled that you gave me."
"Ana!" I turn around and she's looking at me like a concerned parent, "Ana, everything will be okay. Just take it easy and please get those prescriptions filled, make sure you get your next appointment scheduled before you leave."
I make my way out of the doctor's office in a daze; I get into the SUV and pull out my phone. I'll tell him tonight, not over the phone.
I'm already sitting at the table when Christian comes in from work, "Hey baby, how was your day?" He kisses my temple and sat down across from me.
"It was good," I take a deep breath and look anywhere but at him, "What about yours?"
"Long. Busy as usual but I missed you."
We start eating dinner and about half way through he finally says something, "Are you going to tell me what's bothering you?"
"What do you mean…?" I still don't look at him; I am focusing hard on moving my food around...
"Anastasia, look at me."
I finally look at him and I cannot hold back the tears, he starts to get up but I stop him. "No. Please, stay over there," I take a deep breath and wipe my eyes.
"Ana, you're scar-…"
"I'm pregnant." My timing wasn't great but I said it. I finally said it.
"Wha…?"
"I am pregnant. We… We are pregnant, Christian."
He stands up so quickly that his chair falls back on the floor and he starts pacing, "How…?"He stops to look at me, but then when I open my mouth to answer him he starts pacing again.
"Christian, talk to me." I cannot stop the tears now, their flowing out of my eyes like a waterfall.
"I… I…" He finally stops and turns towards me, he doesn't say anything for a while and without taking his eyes off me he screams, "TAYLOR!"
What?
Taylor appears out of thin air, "Yes, sir."
"I need you to go to the drug store and pick up some pregnancy tests. I don't care how many you get just get some." I get up to move towards him but he steps back.
"Christian. You don't need to send Taylor anywhere, Dr. Greene told me herself."
"You already went to Dr. Greene? When did you do this and why didn't you tell me? Did you go with security? What the hell were you thinking?"
This just took a turn for the worst.
"Dr. Greene called me today during work and told me that I had missed my last appointment, it must have been around the time Ray was in the hospital because I completely forgot about it. I went in to see her and she took my blood and did an ultrasound to confirm it."
"But you haven't been sick or been feeling weird have you?"
That's when I pause, I have been feeling weird lately but I figured it was because of the lack of sleep and all the stress. "Christian, I did feel weird but I thought it was just stress…"
"You thought? Why the hell are you so careless!?" Oh he's mad now.
"Excuse me? I'm careless? Do you not hear yourself right now?"
"I have to go…" He moves passed me like I'm not even there.
"What? Why are you leaving?"
"I just cannot be near you right now, I need to think."
I sink to my knees and cry my eyes out, I didn't move until Gail's arms came around me to move me to the bedroom. When I lay down I look on the nightstand and see the bag of pregnancy tests. What a mess this is.
I wake up the next morning feeling even worse; Christian isn't next to me so he probably already left. I see his shirt that he was wearing yesterday on the chair in the corner – so he did come home.
I walk out into the kitchen after getting ready for work and see Gail making breakfast, "Good morning Gail. Do you know if Christian already left for work?"
"Yes, dear. He left really early this morning…"
I frown and hurry to eat my breakfast so I can for work and get my mind off of things.
My day goes by fast and I am feeling even worse by the time I get home, I still haven't heard from Christian all day and I doubt I will even see him tonight. I cannot believe he just left. I walk into the penthouse and start to feel faint; I walk to the kitchen to get a glass of water.
"Ana, are you okay?" Who is that? Is that Gail?
"Ana!"
All I hear is glass breaking and everything goes dark.
I wake up in the hospital with wires and tubes everywhere, its dark in the room which means its dark outside… I look next to me and see him. He's asleep in the chair which is pulled right up next to my bed and his head is on top of my hand as it's engulfed in his big manly hands. I really don't want to wake him but I am so thirsty so I decide to run my other hand through his hair. He stirs for a moment and blinks a couple times as he tries to wake up, and then his head pops up and he's leaning even more towards me.
"Ana, you're awake... Oh thank god." He takes a deep breath and lets an even bigger one out. "Are you okay? Are you thirsty?"
I nod my head and drop my hand back to my side, the other going directly to my stomach, "What happened, Christian?"
"Here, drink this first and then we'll talk." He moves a cup up to my mouth and I take a few slow sips.
I move my hand up to let him know I was finished, "Christian, please tell me what happened…"
"Ana, you fainted because of a few different things – one being because you didn't eat or drink anything all day yesterday."
Yesterday? What day is it? "What do you mean?"
"I'm going to get the doctor, okay?"
He gets up and leaves the room, and then a few minutes later returns with the doctor and a nurse. "Ms. Steele, welcome back. I hear you don't understand why you fainted yesterday?"
I nod my head to let him know to continue.
"First, I would like to ask you some questions…" He pauses and looks to Christian and then to me, "How long did you know about your pregnancy…?"
"Uh," I start to stutter, "I… I just found out yesterday. Why? Did something happen?"
"Ms. Steele, you fainted because you were very dehydrated and you subsequently had a miscarriage."
My mouth falls open and I feel Christian grab my hand but I immediately yank it from him and cover my face to hide the tears. "I… Had a miscarriage? But… I just found out yesterday!?"
"Ms. Steele, you need to calm down, everything is okay now… You did nothing wrong, but sometimes these things happen. We need you to keep your stress levels down for the time you are here."
I lay back and close my eyes, taking a deep breath and try to go to sleep so that everyone knows I don't want to continue this conversation…
I just want to sleep and wake up from this horrid dream.
Hey guys! Sorry I took so long to update but my boyfriend surprised me with a trip to the beach this past weekend and I didn't have a chance to pack my laptop or anything! I also had to work this morning.
This was a flashback chapter all the way, there will probably be one or two more of these throughout this story. Hopefully this will answer some questions about the miscarriage. I apologize if there is any mistakes - I was rushing to get this out today because I promised you guys weekly updates!
Review! Review! Review!
xoxo,
Madss
