The Miz stood with his wife Maryse in the lounge room of the Barrett Manor. In front of him were the three Barrett boys and their father.
"Remind me why I'm doing this WITHOUT telling your mother?" Bad News Barrett scowled at his oldest son.
"Because Mum is run off her feet as it is." Wade Barrett Jr. said firmly. "And we're going to fix this for her."
"Fair dinkum. Remind me why HIS problems are OUR responsibility?" Lawrence Knight also scowled. There wasn't a lick of difference between him and his father, apart from the blonde hair.
"Because he's our father, that's why. Because we're family and we love each other." Stu Sanders pointed out to his twin. "Please Lawrence?"
"Fine, whatever." Lawrence huffed.
"Now, tell me what the issue is." Miz sighed. Unlike Bad News, Miz was perfectly fine. He seemed to have control over his Imprint, although that was probably helped by the fact that Maryse refused to Imprint at all. She had been close to Imprinting until Sophia Barrett was killed to create Rubia, and after that she was too scared to Imprint.
"Dad's obsessed with Mum." Lawrence spat.
"Lawrence! The thing is, Dad gets really upset and anxious whenever Mum isn't around." Wade scowled at his brother.
"He gets really shaky and he stutters." Stu began to get upset. Lawrence put an arm around his twin.
"Uh huh." Miz frowned. "So, apart from be a family man and help your mother run Defiant Wrestling, what sort of hobbies does your father have?"
"I'm right here!" Bad News growled.
"Hobbies?" Wade looked at his brothers, confused.
"I don't think Dad has any hobbies..." Stu mused.
"I have hobbies!" Bad News said indignantly.
"Look, what's happening is, because Bad News has been focused on working with Star on both business and family for years without taking a break for himself, he's become dependent on her, just like any mortal would. Only because he's Imprinted, it's making it worse." Miz explained, annoyed. "Get your Dad a hobby, and he'll be fine."
"Can you NOT talk about me like I'm not here?!" Bad News was getting irate. His three sons quickly swarmed him.
"It's okay Dad, we're here." Wade put an arm around his father.
"We'll look after you!" Stu hugged his father tightly.
"Now that we know how to fix it." Lawrence said, a small glimmer of hope in his heart. "Thanks Uncle Miz."
"Whatever." The Miz snapped. "Next time you call us away from vacation, make it for something serious!"
He stormed out with Maryse behind him. They got into their luxury sports car (it's a Barrett thing) and drove off.
"Glad that's over." Maryse smiled as they pulled into traffic.
"Tell me about it." Miz grumbled. "Although do you get the sinking feeling we just unleashed a serial killer on the general populace?"
"No, why?" Maryse asked as they took off down the highway.
"No reason." Miz shrugged it off.
–
"You have got to be kidding me." Stu Sanders groaned.
"This is by FAR the best hobby in the world – and best of all Mum would definitely approve!" Wade Barrett Jr. grinned.
"Collecting honey?" Lawrence Knight raised an eyebrow.
The four Barrett men were standing in Wades underground honey bunker. Thousands of different jars of honey sat on the shelves along the walls, making Wades mouth water.
"This is stupid." Stu pouted. "We all love honey Wade, but we're not completely top-heavy about it like you are!"
"Are you saying I have a problem?!" Wade shot back.
"If the shoe fits." Lawrence sided with his twin.
"You got any Ghost Pepper Honey?" Bad News Barrett asked.
"Second wing, third shelf from the top." Wade replied before rounding on his brothers again. "Honey is the most delicious and delectable substance in the world!"
"We're not disputing that!" Lawrence groaned. "We're just saying it's not the ONLY thing in the world!"
"And it definitely isn't a hobby for Dad!" Stu added.
"Well I don't see YOU two coming up with any bright ideas!" Wade snapped.
"That's because you never asked!" Stu fired back. "I happen to have a great idea!"
"Really?" His two brothers looked skeptical.
–
"This is fun." Bad News Barrett admitted, swinging his golf club, the ball flying into the distance.
"GOLF?!" Lawrence Knight looked horrified at his little brother. "You want our father to become a golfing WANKER?"
"HEY! I'm doing my best over here!" Stu Sanders fired back.
"Given all of your plans tend to go haywire, I'm less likely to give them a chance." Wade Barrett Jr. pointed out. "How long until Dad becomes frustrated when things don't go his way!"
"Then he'll start getting angry and upset, then he'll cling to Mum more than ever!" Lawrence groaned. "You little idiot!"
Pick the word he shouldn't have said.
"I AM NOT LITTLE!" Stu roared with fury. The twins quickly got into fisticuffs while their brother tried to break them up.
"Crikey mother of...! You two!" Wade finally got the pair separated. "Well, what's YOUR great idea Lawrence?!"
"We need something that's calm and soothing, plus requires concentration in order to keep Dads mind occupied." Lawrence said. "And I know the perfect thing."
–
Bad News Barrett tapped contently along with the music, quite enjoying the ambience.
"Jazz Club. You brought our father to JAZZ CLUB?" Wade Barrett Jr. looked disbelievingly at his brother. "What is WRONG with you?!"
"Jazz is amazing! It's calm, soothing, plus you need a degree of concentration to get the full experience!" Lawrence Knight fought back.
"This is lame. I'm bored!" Stu Sanders whined.
"You're ALWAYS bored!" Lawrence and Wade groaned at him.
"This is stupid. I can't believe you." Wade continued to berate his brother. "JAZZ?"
"Better than honey collecting or golf!" Lawrence snapped.
"Hey, at least golf would have kept him active!" Stu looked ready to cry again.
"Gentlemen." Bad News said to his sons, scaring them. "I really do appreciate the effort you've put in, and I must admit, it's been nice to spend some time with you."
The three boys blinked.
"But you never actually asked me what I like to do." Bad News continued. "Because had you asked, you would know that I already HAVE a hobby – one that I haven't been able to get to now for a few years."
"Oh." Wade looked confused at his brothers.
"But now you boys are all grown up, I think it's time for me to return to my hobby and hopefully give your poor mother a break. I've been a bit of a humbug these past few years, and I'm quite annoyed with myself." Bad News told them.
"Oh..." The boys looked at each other.
"What IS your hobby Dad?" Stu asked.
Bad News grinned.
–
Wade Barrett Jr. sat on the old sofa, eating some Macadamia honey. Lawrence Knight was sitting next to him, sending the odd text message to Felix Cena-Orton. Stu Sanders was sitting at the end of the old sofa, taking notes.
In the middle of the room, a man was sat, strapped to a chair. He was covered in bruises, burns and his own blood.
"Please." He rasped. "Please, I beg you. I didn't mean to upset the Dons daughter..."
"I'm afraid I've got some BAD NEWS." Bad News Barrett growled. He was wearing his old killing jeans again, jeans he'd had for decades, stained with the blood of his victims. "The Don doesn't care WHAT you meant to do, all he knows is that YOU made his little girl cry, not to mention you failed to secure a good price for the shipment that he sent out from Mexico. You've failed him one too many times, and so he's asked me to make you suffer before you die."
"PLEASE!" The man begged as Bad News got out his surgical tools.
"I can't think of a hobby that suits Dad better, can you?" Wade turned to his brothers as the man screamed in agony.
"I like it." Stu said, drawing up a diagram of what his father was currently doing.
"Plus it brings in a fair bit of cash." Lawrence added. "And we all know that makes him happy."
Meanwhile, Star sat in her favourite spot on the stairs leading to the door out of her beloveds secret torture chamber. She smiled. It had been a few months now since the Miz had (in a roundabout way) told Bad News to get a life, and the grumpy old Englishman was finally his old self again, now with added appreciation for his wife and how much she put up with.
"My turn!" She waved to him.
Bad News chuckled, and handed Star the tools he was using. "They're sharp, so be careful." He warned her, her guardian still.
"Yes Wade." Star poked her tongue out at him.
Don't you just love a happy ending?
–
"We LOST two ghouls!" Motor Punk growled angrily. "I was so stupid!"
"Understatement." Miles Otunga pointed out. "I don't know WHY you chose to go with Sheffields plan, but seriously?"
"Hey, I'm smart!" Tex Sheffield snapped.
"Shut it." Motor growled. "We are the Nexus Prime. We're SUPPOSED to be better than our fathers."
"Well, you definitely are. You have a naturally occurring kekkei genkai." Miles tried to cheer his friend up.
"Yeah, only because Dad drugged Mom up with fake Lionswood sap." Motor pointed out. "And even that didn't work correctly."
Motor was the son of not only CM Punk, but AJ Lee, who had had her demon sealed by the Viper Clan decades ago. That meant that she shouldn't have been able to pass on her Clanner genes, but with the synthetic Lionswood sap, she was able to pass on a weak version of her kekkei genkai to her son.
"So? It's still an improvement." Miles sighed.
"Yeah. I wish I could have gotten those Misneach Eyes though..." Motor looked out of the window.
What can be better than quality father/son time?
