Chapter Six
Godric's Hollow
Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Lupin all arrived safely at the Burrow, and Harry and Hermione only had to endure a half hour of lecturing from Mrs. Weasley. Ron, however, being their son, bore the brunt of it for another half hour after that, and he joined Harry and Hermione in his bedroom later, very red and very ill tempered.
Harry was glad to be back at the Burrow, if only for a little while, before he moved to Grimmauld Place. The only downside was that now Ginny wasn't speaking to him at all, and Harry figured she was too angry with him because of the events on his birthday. This hurt Harry more than he thought it would. Now, he wouldn't even be able to see her as a friend.
"She'll get over it, mate," Ron assured him, as they were loading up Harry's suitcase. "Let her cool off and she'll come 'round."
Harry wasn't so sure.
Hermione had elected to remain at the Burrow instead of going home for the summer, something that Harry had noticed was, over the years, becoming more frequent. Hermione had been spending less and less time with her family during school breaks, and Harry began to wonder whether Hermione's magical abilities had started to take a toll on her Muggle parents and her relationship with them. Perhaps both Hermione and her parents had come to realize what having a witch in the family meant. She wasn't apart of their world anymore, and Harry suddenly felt a little angry at the Ministry for weeding out the Muggle-born children who possessed magical abilities and whisking them away to school, away from their parents and the world they were so used to. It was fine for me, Harry thought. I was glad to be a wizard, I couldn't wait to get away from the Dursleys. But... I wonder if it was okay for Hermione. Or my mum. Her relationship with her sister ended because she was a witch.
Harry, Hermione, and Ron had been informed that Dumbledore had left no note or instructions as to who was to run the Order of the Phoenix should anything happen to him. So, it was by unanimous vote - almost - that Lupin had been elected head of the Order. The one exception had been Mad-Eye Moody, who felt the position belonged to him due to his status as an ex-Auror.
"We appreciate Mad-Eye, we really do," Mr. Weasley had said. "We just felt that he's a bit... eccentric."
Ron told them that was the understatement of the year. Unless that by "eccentric" they meant "mad as a hatter".
Harry wondered how Lupin could manage running the Order when he was supposed to be underground with the other werewolves, but Lupin mentioned later that after the battle at Hogwarts there was no way he would be able to return to the pack.
"Greyback would have told them everything," he explained. "But, I gave them my message, and hopefully a few of them listened." Harry commented that he sounded a lot like Hagrid when he was talking about his mission with the giants.
Lupin smiled. "Well, the two have a lot in common. Both races are untrusting of humans, especially the Magical population. Werewolves are ostracized from society and met with fear. The giants were almost destroyed by wizards, and are also greatly feared. Fear is bred from a lack of understanding, Harry. I'm sure you've heard the expression before."
There was also the question of whether Grimmauld Place was still safe from detection. Lupin answered that one as well.
"When a Secret-Keeper dies, they take their secret with them. So, they quite literally carry it to the grave," he explained.
Harry winced.
"I know it still hurts to hear it, Harry," Lupin said, putting an arm around Harry's shoulder. "Even after a few months time, the wound still runs very deep."
Harry nodded, reaching for the locket again. At Lupin's questioning look, he forced himself to stop. "What about bringing in new members?"
"Ah," Lupin said, running a hand through his greying hair, "that's the part that poses a problem. You see, since Dumbledore was Secret-Keeper, it does still protect us from being discovered. But, if we gather new members, they won't be able to join us at headquarters for that same reason. Dumbledore was the only one who could tell people where the Order was located. We're still trying to figure out what to do about that. We could either abandon Grimmauld Place and find a new residence for headquarters, and have a new Secret-Keeper, or we could still maintain headquarters there, but just find another way of communicating our meetings with the new members."
Harry was all for moving out of Grimmauld Place, but as Lupin was now in charge, that decision was up to him.
Later that afternoon, Harry re-packed all his belongings and carried Hedwig - safe again in her cage - down to the kitchen. The remaining Weasleys, Hermione, and Lupin were all waiting for him. Fred and George had of course returned to Diagon Alley and their booming business
"Arthur will come by later with your things, Harry, dear," Mrs. Weasley told him, giving him a hug. "It was so nice having you here, Harry. We're always happy to have you, and we'll see you again soon."
"Thank you, Mrs. Weasley. Mr Weasley," Harry nodded in appreciation. He turned to Ron. "See you soon, mate?"
Ron nodded, and Hermione threw her arms around Harry and squeezed him tightly.
"We'll come with Mr. Weasley when he brings your things," she said.
Harry hugged her back and smiled. "Good."
He pulled away and gave a pointed look at Ron, who shifted uncomfortably. He then turned toward the last member of the Weasley's.
"Bye, Ginny," he said, giving her a weak smile.
She did not return it. "Take care of yourself, Harry," she said back, rather cooly.
Harry's smile faded. "Yeah. You, too."
He joined Lupin at the door, waved his final goodbye to the Weasleys and Hermione, and then the two walked to the Apparition point by the entrance to the Burrow. Harry held on to Lupin tightly, and then they were off to Number 12, Grimmauld Place.
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Sirius' old house was the same as it had always been, except for the new addition of a squealing Tonks that all but tackled Lupin as he and Harry walked through the door. She probably would have succeeded, had she not tripped - as usual - on the troll leg umbrella stand. Tonks fell to the floor with a crash, and Mrs. Black promptly started screaming her head off.
"Still haven't found a way to get rid of her?" Harry asked, grinning slightly. He righted the umbrella stand as Lupin helped Tonks to her feet.
"Unfortunately, no. Though, you'd think she'd be eager to leave, what with being woken up about two hundred times a day," he said to Tonks, teasingly.
"Merlin forbid I miss you," Tonks retorted, squeezing his hand.
"Yes, I'm sure you missed me terribly from this morning."
Harry laughed.
"I'm going to go turn her off," Tonks said, indicating the bellowing portrait. "Wotcher, Harry."
"Hello, Tonks," Harry said back as she headed off down the hall. Harry turned back to Lupin, raising his eyebrows. "So... how's the Missus?"
Lupin pushed him playfully. "Ha ha, yes, very funny. Come to the kitchen. I have something to discuss with you. Moody and Shacklebolt are here as well, I think."
"Discuss with me?" Harry repeated, with a slight note of trepidation.
"Don't worry, it's nothing too serious," Lupin assured him, leading the way down the stairs. Harry followed. He tried not to look at his surroundings; being in Grimmauld Place was a painful reminder that Sirius was gone. A hollow, empty feeling was already settling in the pit of his stomach.
This would never be home.
As predicted, Alastor Moody and Kingsley Shacklebolt were at the table when Lupin and Harry came downstairs.
"Ah, Potter," Moody began, gruffly. "Glad to see you're all in one piece, although it's not for your lack of trying to be otherwise."
Harry suppressed a sigh.
"Now, Mad-Eye," Lupin started, "Harry's already been through enough. He realizes the danger he put himself in. Now drop it."
"What about the danger he put everyone else in?" Moody demanded. "You almost in St. Mungo's, and Hapkirk d-"
Shacklebolt gave him a stern look. "That's enough, Mad-Eye."
Harry froze. "Someone was killed?"
The room fell silent.
"Answer me," Harry demanded.
Lupin sat in a chair at the table and shifted uncomfortably. "Yes, unfortunately, there was a casualty, but it was not your fault."
"How is it not my fault?" Harry felt panic rising inside him and he had no idea why. "You all came to rescue us, you wouldn't have been there if I hadn't gone back-"
"And you know that. We also knew what we were getting into when we signed on to be in the Order. And so did Hapkirk," Lupin told him. He sighed, and added, more gently, "Harry, people die in war. We fight in battle after battle... if someone didn't fall this time, they would have the next. Do you understand?"
Harry didn't understand at all. The utter pointlessness of the other night finally hit him like a ton of bricks. Someone had died. He had allowed Voldemort to kill yet another person. "It won't happen again," Harry vowed, out loud.
Mad-Eye huffed. "It better not. Of all the dim-witted things to do, Potter, honestly. Did you forget for a minute that it's you he's after?"
"No," Harry said, flatly.
"Well, next time use your brain."
I wish Dumbledore were here, Harry thought, glumly. The dark, dank kitchen echoed his feelings. God how he hated this place.
"What did you want to talk to me about?" he asked, quickly changing the subject.
"Well, we wanted to tell you that we've spoken to your Aunt and Uncle, and they've agreed, for their own protection, to be relocated to some place safe. Their identities have been changed, and we feel that they'll no longer be any kind of target for Voldemort," Lupin explained.
Harry stared at them. "Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon let you move them?" he asked, shocked.
"Well... your uncle was a little... put out by the idea, now that you mention it," Lupin admitted.
"Hmph," snorted Moody. "Ruddy pissed off, more like. Said we had no right to make them move out of their home."
"But your aunt seems to have... well, seen the light, I guess is a good way of putting it. After the events that she, er, 'happened' to witness out the window, she realized exactly what you and everyone else was up against, and probably also realized that Voldemort could use them to get to you," Lupin continued. "Voldemort is probably aware that you don't have good relations with the Dursleys, Harry. But I am sure it would hurt you terribly if anything were to happen to them."
"So, they agreed to be moved somewhere safer?" Harry asked.
Lupin nodded.
"Where did you send them?"
"Unfortunately, we can't even tell you that, Harry. Just feel sure that no harm will come to them, and they are quite fine, and away from Privet Drive."
I'm sure them up and moving caused a great bit of gossip, Harry thought. Aunt Petunia should be pleased. "Was there anything else?" he asked Moody, Lupin, and Shacklebolt.
Lupin sat up a little straighter. "Well... as you know, I've been, er, elected to try and run the Order now that Dumbledore's... departed."
"We all run it, in a way," Shacklebolt said. "Remus is in charge of giving out duties, validating plans, and the like."
"Harry, I know Dumbledore would have wanted you to be a part of this," Lupin continued. "You're of age now, and from what I hear you're not continuing school - which is something I am going to talk to you about later."
Harry gave him a wry smile.
"We want you to become a member of the Order. And, to be frank, I'd love your input. Dumbledore really believed in you, Harry. We could use you."
Harry blinked. "I dropped out after my sixth year. I haven't even-"
"Bollocks," said Mad-Eye. "You've got power and you've got talent, Potter. Dumbledore saw it. We can all see it."
"You produced a Patronus in your third year. You made it through the TriWizard tournament when you were fourteen," Lupin explained. "You've faced Voldemort, more than once, and lived to tell about it. Dumbledore trusted you with his life."
"You organized that Defense Against the Dark Arts club," Shacklebolt added.
"See? That's what I mean," Lupin agreed. "You're a leader, Harry. Defense Against the Dark Arts was your favorite subject. And - both fortunately and unfortunately - you have a tie to Voldemort. You understand him. You've... studied him."
Lupin looked pointedly at him, and Harry understood what he meant. Lupin must have known about his "lessons" with Dumbledore. "You really want me to become an Order member?"
"Absolutely," Lupin said.
A small flicker of happiness invaded the gloom the house had set upon Harry. "I'd love to. I want to help, I want to fight."
"That's the spirit," Mad-Eye said, approvingly.
"How do I join?"
"You just did. Lupin elected you, and Shacklebolt and I second it. You're in, Potter."
Harry looked at them. "That's it? Seriously?"
Lupin shrugged. "No one said we were fancy. Welcome aboard."
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It was official. Harry totally and completely hated Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place. No matter where he went in the three story town home, there wasn't a thing that didn't remind him of Sirius. The gaping hole kept getting larger and larger, and Harry found himself getting more depressed each day. The only thing he had to look forward to were Order meetings and spending time with Ron and Hermione again, who visited almost every day now that they could Apparate. They were usually accompanied by Mad-Eye, who had decided that it was his personal duty to make sure they didn't try and get themselves killed by Voldemort again. And it had seemed that Ron had indeed plucked up the courage to speak to Hermione. There was a lot more physical contact going on between the two, and they were spending a lot of time together when not with Harry. And most of that time involved Ron sleeping with his head in Hermione's lap as she read. Harry couldn't be anymore happier for them, even if it sometimes was a painful reminder of what he had lost with Ginny. And he was very glad that it hadn't seemed to change anything between the three of them. He hadn't been sure whether Ron and Hermione were going to turn into the snogfest that was Ron and Lavender.
Although everyone had repeatedly reminded him that Number 12 was now his, he would have given it up in a heartbeat. He was sorely tempted to give it to the Weasleys, as the home would be more than enough to house Molly, Arthur, Ron, and Ginny, and also the other four Weasleys and Fleur if they ever came to visit. Harry didn't think of including Percy, since it was becoming painfully obvious that the third eldest Weasley was never going to reclaim ties to his family. Harry loved the Burrow almost as much as he loved Hogwarts, but the Weasleys deserved better. Ron was, actually, quite keen on the idea.
"It's a Dark Wizards house and all, yeah, but it's pretty cool at the same time," he said. They were lounging on the floor in the old sitting room, flipping through some of the books that Lupin had accumulated. "Plus, maybe you'd be happier if we lived here, too. That way we'd see each other almost all the time, even if Hermione and I do go back to school."
"Yeah, maybe," Harry said, absent-mindedly.
"Plus, it would work out well if Voldemort really is after the lot of us now, with the Fidelius charm and all."
Something in Harry's mind imeadiately clicked.
"Ron," he said, excitedly, "you are bloody brilliant."
Ron blinked at him. "Thanks, mate. No idea what you're talking about, though. And you might want to tell Hermione I'm brilliant, if you get the chance, because I'm sure it will shock her to know she's not the only one."
But Harry was halfway out of the room and down the hall before Ron had finished talking.
He rushed down the stairs into the kitchen - which had become the unofficial Order meeting place - to find Lupin making himself some tea.
"Remus," Harry began, catching his breath. "I need to talk to you about something."
The day after Harry arrived at Grimmauld Place he had been - jokingly - ordered by Lupin to start referring to him by his first name, seeing as how Lupin had been best friends with Harry's father, and Harry was now considered an adult. It had taken a while for Harry - and Ron and Hermione as well - to get used to calling their former professor by his given name, but after a while, it had started to feel nice being friendly and on first name basis with one of his father's old friends.
"Yes, Harry, what can I do for you?" Lupin asked, stirring some cream into his tea. "Why are you in such a rush, is something wrong?"
Harry shook his head. "No, no, it's not anything bad. I've just had... well, it was Ron's idea, really, but anyway... we just had the most brilliant idea."
"Oh, really?" Lupin raised his eyebrows. "And what is this oh-so-brilliant idea about, then?"
"Well, since the house is protected by the Fidelius charm and all, it also protects the people living in it from being detected as well, right? That's why I'm here now, and you as well."
Lupin sipped his tea. "Yes, that's right."
"Alright, so, what I was thinking was, since it looks like Voldemort may come after Ron and Hermione to get to me, and the house is already protected by the Fidelius... why don't the Weasleys and the Grangers move in here? We have plenty of room. And, yeah, I know it's my house now and everything, but it's also Order headquarters, and I wanted to run it by you. I want Ron and Hermione, and their families, to be safe."
Lupin thought for a moment. "I think that is an excellent and very sound idea, Harry. I agree that the Weasleys and the Grangers should both probably be moved somewhere where they will be hidden. There is no telling whether Voldemort would come after them, but seeing as how Ron and Hermione are close to you, there is a very good chance. There's only one problem."
Harry's smile faded. "What's that?"
"Muggle repelling charms, like the ones that Hogwarts has around it. Sirius' father set them up so that Muggles wouldn't be able to find or see the house. The Grangers wouldn't be able to see it, for one, because of the Fidelius charm. And two, as soon as they got near it, the repelling charm would make them remember some kind of urgent appointment or meeting and they'd rush right off again."
"Damn, I forgot about that," Harry admitted. "But, it'll work for the Weasleys, they're here all the time. We'd just have to move them in. Can't we do something else for the Grangers? Maybe put a Fidelius Charm on their house, or something?"
"That's a possibility, but who would be their Secret Keeper? Harry, they're not familiar with our ways, and I think that telling them they need to go into hiding and suggesting that they allow us to perform a spell that wouldn't let anyone know where they are would... unsettle them," Lupin explained.
"But, we're at war. And I'm kind of in the center of it. Surely they want to be safe? I mean, damn, even the Dursleys agreed to move!"
"I'm not even sure if they know what's going on, Harry, to be honest. That's something you're going to have to discuss with Hermione. I'm all for protecting them, believe me. And I will run your suggestion that the Weasleys move in here with Arthur and Molly, as well as key members of the Order. But when it comes to the Grangers... I'd discuss it with Hermione, as I said. Very good thinking, though, Harry."
"Thanks," Harry said, albeit a little glumly. He had thought for sure he had found a way to keep Ron and Hermione's families safe from Voldemort. "Where is Hermione, do you know?"
"She's not with Ron?" Lupin asked.
Harry shook his head.
"Hmmm... she's probably upstairs with Ginny."
Harry's stomach clenched. Ginny, of course. The Weasleys, minus Bill and Charlie, were at Grimmauld Place for the weekend, because the Order was calling a meeting that evening with just it's most influential and most trustworthy members. Professor McGonnagal, Tonks, Shacklebolt, Moody, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Harry, and of course Lupin were the only ones that were going to be in attendance. Ron, Hermione, and Ginny had tagged along to visit Harry. Well... Ron and Hermione had, at least. Ginny had done a very good job of avoiding Harry for most of the day.
Harry climbed the stairs up to the floor where Ginny and Hermione were rooming together and knocked on the door.
"Come in!" Hermione answered, and Harry swung the door open and stepped inside. Fortunately - or unfortunately... Harry couldn't decide - Ginny was absent, and Hermione was alone sitting next to her trunk, organizing her books.
"Hey, Harry," she greeted him, checking the title on the book she was holding. She moved some things around in her trunk, and then placed it in with the others.
Harry sat down on her bed and watched her for a while. "Hermione," he asked, finally, "what are you doing?"
"Alphabetizing my books," she answered. "Sometimes I do that when I'm stressed. I'll dump them all out and then resort them again." She looked up at Harry meekly. "I know it's kind of stupid. Please don't tell Ron-"
Harry shook his head. "It's not stupid. We all have our things. And I won't tell Ron, if you don't want me to."
Hermione smiled. "Thanks. It's just... a lot of things I do annoy him already, and I... well, we've just finally realized..." She sighed. "I don't want to ruin it."
Harry nodded, thinking of Ginny. "I understand."
Hermione returned to her small mountain of text, and Harry continued watching her again, trying to think of how to phrase what he needed to ask her.
"I know you didn't come here to watch me organize my textbooks," Hermione said. "Did you need to talk to me about something?"
"Yeah, sort of," Harry answered. "I just... don't know how to put it, I guess."
This made Hermione stop and look at him, concerned. "What's the matter?"
"Well, Ron and I were talking downstairs, about how much I hate this place because it reminds me of Sirius. And... to make a long story short, he asked if I would be happier if he came to live here."
Hermione brightened considerably. "I think that's an excellent idea. He should stay here with you until we go back to school."
"So, you're going?" Harry asked.
"Until you need us, of course. You said yourself you don't want us throwing away our education, and you know that school's important to me, and I've, um... I've been made Head Girl."
Harry blinked. "You what? When? Why didn't you say anything?"
"I found out this morning, and I didn't want to say anything because school is still a touchy subject for Ron," Hermione explained.
"He doesn't want to go back," Harry said, simply.
"You know he'd follow you anywhere."
With a small smile, Harry remembered Ron's Patronus. "Yeah, I know. And I want you all there with me."
Hermione smiled back. "Besides, my parents would be furious with me if I dropped out of school with just a year left, after being made Head Girl and being at the top of all of my classes."
"So, your parents know, then?"
"I owled them this morning. Head Girl and Prefect and things like that... they understand those. It's when I write that I've passed all my O.W.L.s, or that I discovered an easier way to brew Pepper-Up Potion or something that they kind of... nod their heads and smile, I guess."
Harry fidgeted slightly. "Um... how are your parents?"
Hermione seemed taken aback. "They're fine. Their practice is going very well."
"Are they worried at all? About the war, I mean."
Hermione became very quiet, and started sorting her books again. "Why do you ask?"
"Because, Ron may not be the only person coming to live here," Harry began. "Since Voldemort kind of hinted on my birthday that he might come after you two, or your families, I talked to Remus. And since the house is already protected by the Fidelius Charm, he and I both thought that the Weasleys should come live here, too, so they'll be protected. I tried to do the same for your mum and dad, but-"
"-Muggle Repelling Charms," Hermione finished. "It was a nice thought, though, Harry. And I think the Weasleys being here will be good for you."
"Well... I was thinking instead to maybe do a Fidelius Charm for you parents, since Grimmauld Place won't work," Harry told her.
Hermione paused, but didn't say anything.
"They moved the Dursleys, you know," Harry continued. "They agreed to move and change their names and all that, just in case. Maybe your parents could do something like that. I mean, I know they have their dental practice, but-"
"Um, Harry," Hermione interrupted, "I'm not sure if that's going to work."
Harry looked at her oddly. "What do you mean?"
Hermione didn't look at him. "Well, my parents know you and I are friends, Harry. But, they don't exactly know all about, well, you. About you and Voldemort, I mean. I haven't exactly told them about how, um... dangerous, I guess, it is being your friend."
Harry wasn't sure what to say to that. After a short pause, the best he could do was: "Oh."
"Please don't take it the wrong way, I didn't mean anything. You're not dangerous, it's just-" She waved her hands about in a frustrated manner. "Oh, I can't explain it to them, Harry! They know about Voldemort, they know what he's done and what he's doing, and they're worried about me, yes. But not as much as they would be if they found out just how close you, Ron, and I really are. And that... and that Voldemort could come after me. Or them."
"So, it's better to just leave them in the dark?" Harry asked.
"Please don't lecture me about this," Hermione said, a little frostily. "They don't understand. And I don't want to worry them needlessly."
Harry snorted. "Needlessly? Hermione, Voldemort could show up at their house tomorrow!"
Hermione winced. "Don't say things like that."
"But, it's the truth! You want them to be safe, don't you?"
Hermione slammed her trunk shut and glared at Harry furiously. "Of course, I do! What kind of question is that?"
"Then you need to tell them! Convince them to go into hiding or something."
"It's not that simple."
"Why not?" Harry asked, exasperated.
Hermione opened her mouth and then closed it again. She began to pace, answering, "They don't understand."
"That's getting a little old. They don't understand what? They agreed to send you to Hogwarts, didn't they?"
"Yes," Hermione answered.
"Well, then what's the problem? What don't they understand?"
"Everything!" Hermione shouted, suddenly, making Harry jump. "It was fine the first couple of years after I went to Hogwarts. Nothing was really different, and they were really supportive. But, after about fourth year we just... stopped talking. I mean, we stopped talking about things. Things that we all enjoyed, because the things I enjoyed were things they could never be apart of. And I was so wrapped up in Voldemort coming back, and helping the Order, and then I was worried about you... We just don't talk," she finished. "And, after a while, I just stopped going home because I felt like I didn't belong. They never made me feel that way, and we tried to be the same as before we found out I was a witch, but I guess you can never go back. They're still my parents, and I'm still their daughter. I love them. But, I don't want to tell them about this, Harry, because I'm just afraid it'll be another thing that drives us further apart."
Harry got up and took Hermione's hand, forcing her to look at him. "You don't have to tell them alone. I could go with you, or Ron-"
Hermione scoffed. "Ron? Look, I love him as much as you do, but he's not the most sensitive of beings." She sighed. "I can't... I can't do this one alone." She bit her lip. "Maybe if someone went with me, it would be easier. They'd be able to explain it properly; make them see what's going on."
"Do you want me to go?" Harry asked.
Hermione shook her head. "No offense, Harry, but no. I don't think that would help the situation. If they're at all confused or angry about it, they might lash out at you because you're the one that Voldemort is after. Actually, I think I'd like Remus to go."
"That's a really good idea."
"Yes, I think so, too. He's... calm and polite, and I think that if the idea of this was coming from him, as well as me, it'll make it much easier to swallow."
Harry squeezed her hand. "So... it's settled then? You'll talk to them, with Remus?"
Hermione swallowed and nodded. "I guess I'll have to. You're right; it's too dangerous. It's a small chance that they'll come after them because of me, but... I suppose I'd rather them be safe than be..." She blinked back tears.
Harry enveloped her in a hug, which she returned, gripping him tightly. "Have you talked to Ron at all about this? I can't believe you haven't mentioned this to anyone. We're your friends."
"I talk to Ginny sometimes," Hermione admitted, pulling away. "Plus, to be honest, we've just had so many other things going on. I think this is more important. We're at war."
"Well... your family's important, too."
Hermione glared at him again. "I know that, Harry. I did say I would talk to them."
Harry sighed. "I'm not trying to lecture you, or make it out like you don't care about them or something, it's just... at least you have parents, Hermione. You have something that I never had, and will never understand. I had a bond with Sirius, yeah, but probably nothing like you have, or had, with your mum and dad. And I'm not saying that to make you feel bad, or get pity, or something."
"You know I'd never pity you, Harry. It's not what you want. You never wanted that."
"I never wanted a lot of things," Harry said, quietly.
"Yes," Hermione agreed. "Things turned out a lot differently then we thought they would, didn't they?"
"Yeah. For instance, seven years ago, I would never have expected you to be with Ron."
Hermione laughed. "Me either," she giggled.
Harry laughed, too.
"It's good to see you smiling again, Harry," Hermione told him.
He shrugged. "Not a lot to smile about lately. Just... don't bottle up your problems. Ron's your boyfriend now, he's going to be there for you. Even more than when he was just your friend. He really does care about you."
Hermione nodded. "I know. I care for him, too."
There was a knock on the door.
"I'll get it," Harry offered. "You should get back to your alphabetizing."
"Har har," Hermione said, sarcastically, as he opened the door.
"Oh, Harry!" Ginny exclaimed as she almost walked right into him. "I'm sorry, I heard Hermione shouting and... We're you two fighting?" she asked, eyeing him suspiciously.
Harry frowned. "No."
"Well... can I come in?" she asked, for Harry was still standing in the entrance.
"Oh, right. Sorry," Harry said. He moved to the right the same time Ginny did. They both laughed, albeit uncomfortably, and then both moved to the left. Harry felt like he was in some sort of bad romantic comedy. Finally, he just grabbed her around the waist and spun her around, so that he was back in the hall, and she was in Hermione's room.
"Um, thanks," Ginny said, blushing a little. "See you later."
"Thanks for talking to me, Harry," Hermione yelled to him as Ginny shut the door.
Harry sighed and slumped against it, letting the back of his head hit the cold wood. "You're welcome," he muttered to the empty hall way.
------------------
A couple of hours later, Harry, Remus, Moody, Tonks, Shacklebolt, McGonnagal, and Molly and Arthur Weasley were congregated around the giant table in the Blacks' old kitchen.
"So," Moody started once everyone had been seated. "What's this all about, then?"
Harry and Lupin exchanged glances, and Lupin said, "Harry and I have been discussing some things, mainly what Dumbledore imparted to Harry concerning Voldemort."
"We wouldn't, by any chance, be finding out where the two of you were the night Albus was killed?" McGonnagal asked, eyebrows raised.
Harry shook his head and said, firmly, "Sorry, no. Remus and I have been talking a lot since I came back to Grimmauld Place. Professor Dumbledore had been keeping him informed of my, er, private lessons that I'd been having last year. I think you knew about them, too, Professor McGonnagal."
She nodded. "I wasn't aware of the details, mind. Only that it had to do with You-Know-Who."
"Dumbledore used his Pensieve to convey his and other people's memories of Voldemort, from the time he was a child to when he was at school and after, in hopes to prepare Harry for what he would be facing," Remus explained. "I knew about as much as Minerva, but Harry's been elaborating to me some of what those memories entailed. But, I - like the rest of you - don't know the whole story."
"And you won't know the whole story," Harry said. "Look, I'm sorry, but I swore to Dumbledore that I wouldn't spread some of the information that we learned about Voldemort. It's too risky. The less people that know, the better. But, there are some things that I think you all should be told. Voldemort's already come after me once. Some of the people in this room had to face him on my birthday. And there's a huge chance that we'll all be facing him again. The more you know about him, the better."
"Well, that's the thing, isn't it, Harry," Mr. Weasley said. "Not much is known."
"Dumbledore knew. And so did others. That was what the Pensieve and my lessons were for. And that's also what this meeting's for." Harry took a deep breath. "Most of you know by now that Voldemort's real name is Tom Riddle. His father was a Muggle, by the same name, and his mum was a witch named Merope Gaunt. She was a direct descendent of Salazar Slytherin. Voldemort, actually, was the one who opened the Chamber of Secrets the first time."
The Weasleys' eyes widened. "I never believed it was Hagrid," Mrs. Weasley said, shocked. "But Vol- er, You-Know-Who, never crossed my mind."
"Yeah, well... he framed Hagrid. Dumbledore, of course, knew what happened, and that's why he convinced Headmaster Dippet to let Hagrid stay on as gamekeeper. Tom grew up in a Muggle orphanage, and he closed the Chamber because they were going to shut down the school, and he didn't want to have to go back."
"I was in school when that happened," McGonnagal said, softly. "Riddle was a few years ahead of me. I remember some of the things he and his gang used to do, although Ogg, Filch, and Dippet never could trace it back to them."
"Then maybe you could tell us a bit more about Voldemort at school when we have more time," Remus suggested. McGonnagal nodded.
"When he was in the orphanage, Dumbledore found out that Riddle already had a lot of power, and he used that power to frighten the other kids that lived with him," Harry continued. "He used to collect things from the people he'd tormented. He could already speak Parseltongue, and he was very independent. And angry. Sometimes, in his eyes, you could see what he would become, even when he was that young." Harry trailed off, remembering the bestial look that the young Tom Riddle had in his eyes when Dumbledore told him he was a wizard. At the odd looks that he was getting from the other Order members, he snapped himself out of his reverie. "Anyway," he continued, "he was in the Slug Club - when Professor Slughorn taught at Hogwarts the first time - and that's where he recruited some of the first Death Eaters. In the memory that I saw, Slughorn mentioned Avery and Lestrange, so I'm guessing those were the fathers of the ones that we know of."
"What happened to his mother and father?" Tonks asked.
"His mother died right after he was born," Harry explained. "His father abandoned Merope after he found out she was a witch. That's why he had to stay in the orphanage."
"That's horrible," Tonks muttered. "No wonder he hates Muggles so much."
Harry shook his head. "It goes deeper than that. I'm sure that had something to do with it, but... the Gaunts were all crazy. They were those sort of pure-blood nutters that inbred and married their cousins and stuff."
"I don't doubt that finding out his father was a Muggle, and then finding out that he left them, did anything to quell Voldemort's hatred for non-magical people. And now he's turned into a sort of pure-blood maniac," Remus interjected.
"Or he's using that to gain control," Moody huffed. "Voldemort wants power, he wants to rule. Of course he's going to say he's for the purification of the Wizarding world. That's how he gets his followers."
"But, I really think he is. He killed his father," Harry stated, "when he was sixteen. The irony is, he's a half-blood. He's killing off people that are just like him. That are just like me. Anyone who marries a Muggle or are friends with Muggle-borns are called blood traitors, and he kills them, too. It's like... it's like, if he couldn't be pure, if he has to know that his father was a Muggle, then everything that connects him to being a part of his father has to die. Like, if he destroys anything that's not magic, there won't be anything to remind him of who and what he really is. And that means Muggles, Muggle-borns, half-bloods... until all we have left are people like the Blacks and the Malfoys."
"That's sick," someone muttered, softly. Harry couldn't tell who. After he had revealed that Voldemort had committed patricide while still in school, the room had collectively exchanged glances of shock and disgust, and had remained silent.
"As everyone already knows from the First War, or tales of the First War, we're dealing with a madman," Remus said. "A very powerful and brilliant madman. He's manipulative, calculating, and for all intents and purposes breeding an army. Voldemort is many things, but stupid is not one of them. If we're going to go up against him and win, we have our work cut out for us. Dumbledore is gone. We have to do this alone. Had Dumbledore still been alive, I don't think we'd be having this conversation. There would have been no need."
"Potter's right," Moody interrupted. "Eventually, we will all come face to face with the Dark Lord. And it's better that you understand right now what you're dealing with. He was tormenting, torturing, and murdering without care by the time he was sixteen years old. He did experiments on himself... Dark magic... that's turned him into what he is. In the ten years that he left Hogwarts and then returned to begin his reign of terror, he had transformed himself into being almost unrecognizable. Tom Riddle was gone, if he even existed at all; to me, he's always been Voldemort. I think a lot of people would be shocked to know that Voldemort used to be Riddle. I guarantee you ninety percent of the Wizarding population doesn't know."
"And they probably won't care," Remus said. "It makes no difference now. From what I've heard from Harry, he's always been evil. Mad-Eye's right... he's always been Voldemort. Tom Riddle was just something he allowed himself to be called until the time was right."
"Everyone knows the rest of the story. He gathered followers, mostly from rich, pure-blooded families like the Malfoys, and went on a killing spree," Harry finished. "I think at first he might have just been trying to scare people. To show them he wasn't afraid to murder. And to show that his Death Eaters weren't afraid of getting their hands dirty either."
"His murders became more calculated, though. He found out who had power and the ability to sway people and either blackmailed or Imperiused them. He took out key people who could have prompted others to take action against him, much like he's doing right now. And then once he found out about the Order, well... I'm sure everyone's seen the photograph," Lupin said, sadly.
The photograph in question was of the original Order, most of who had died horrible deaths at the hands of Voldemort or the Death Eaters.
"So... what do we do now?" Tonks asked.
"Study up, I guess," Harry shrugged. "We know that he fears death. That's why he tried to so hard to defeat it."
"He did defeat it," Shacklebolt pointed out. Harry looked pointedly at the floor. If only you knew, he thought.
"Dumbledore also said he doesn't like the dark, because it represents the unknown," Harry continued. He thought of the boundaries surrounding the fake Horcrux, and how blood was needed to pass through the gateway. "He also thinks physical injuries imply weakness."
"This isn't kid stuff," Moody barked, suddenly. "We're not taking OWL Defense Against the Dark Arts. I say we learn as many spells as we can, light and dark, to prepare ourselves."
"Fight fire with fire, Alastor?" McGonnagal asked, dubiously. "What separates us from people like He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and the Death Eaters is that we won't use certain spells against another."
"And it's what's getting us killed. We should at least study them; we can't fight what we're not prepared for. We can't fight what he don't know."
"Alastor has a point," Remus agreed. "I understand that Harry shares this point of view, and was actually a step ahead of us, starting this summer."
"What!" squawked Mrs. Weasley. "You've been studying Dark magic?"
"No! I've been looking up spells, so I'll recognize them, and I've been learning more hexes, and curses, and defensive spellwork," Harry said, hotly. "Hermione brought me a lot of books, and I also got some out of Diagon Alley." Better not mention the ones Hermione got me from Knockturn. "Ron and Hermione have been helping me."
"That needs to stop," Mrs. Weasley huffed. "They're too young-"
"They're Harry's friends, and they're of age. We can't stop them. And, if you recall, Sirius, James, Lily, and myself were all fresh out of Hogwarts when we joined the Order," Remus pointed out.
"Yes, but they're not out of Hogwarts yet-"
"Molly," Mr. Weasley said, tiredly, "can we please save this argument for another time?"
Mrs. Weasley pursed her lips, but didn't say anything else.
"Anyway," Harry started again, sighing, "I just thought maybe you all would like some insight on Voldemort."
"Better the devil you know then the one you don't," Shacklebolt said, softly.
Harry grinned. "Yeah, something like that." He looked at the clock; it was almost nine. Remus followed his gaze.
"I think we should call it a night. We'll meet here tomorrow to discuss our Secret Keeper problem, and duel out new patrol duties. Kingsley, how are things coming on the recruitment front? Tonks tells me things are pretty bleak."
Shacklebolt nodded. "Scrimgeour's been running a tight ship. He's insisting that everything needs to be done his way. It feels more like martial law everyday. I really don't think we'll be getting anymore help from the Auror front."
Lupin sighed. "Arthur? Any luck in your department."
"I get more interest everyday, but until we find away to figure out this Fidelius charm, it won't really matter, will it? How are we supposed to get information to the new recruits without being overheard?" Mr. Weasley asked, stifling a yawn.
"Well, that's something we'll have to address tomorrow." Remus yawned himself. "Go on, everyone, go home and get some sleep. We'll meet back here tomorrow evening."
"No sleep for me," Tonks said, grumpily. "I'm on duty tonight, and I have to be in at nine tomorrow morning."
"Such is life, my dear," Remus said, smiling and kissing her on the cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow."
Everyone said their goodbyes to Harry and Remus, and then made their way out the door. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley headed upstairs, while the rest left in twos out the front, probably to Apparate.
"You did well, Harry," Remus said, stretching. "I'm sure that couldn't have been easy for you."
Harry nodded. He suddenly felt very guilty. He didn't like hiding the knowledge that Voldemort had made horcruxes from the rest of the Order. They don't know. They don't know, and what they don't know about Voldemort could kill them. They need to know what he's done; what he's capably of. He ripped his soul into pieces, for God's sake!
You promised Dumbledore, his mind argued. He really wished it would shut up.
Well, Dumbledore may have been wrong. I'm not going to be responsible if something happens to one of them because they didn't know any better.
Don't be an idiot.
"Oh, will you shut up," Harry muttered, running his hands through his hair.
Remus raised an eyebrow. "Are you feeling okay, Harry?"
Harry rubbed his hands over his face tiredly. "Huh? Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little tired. I wasn't talking to you, I'm sorry."
"Did you speak to Hermione?" Lupin asked. He was still looking at Harry with concern.
"Yeah. She's agreed to talk to her parents... hasn't she come to talk to you about it yet?"
Remus shook his head. "No, she hasn't. I'll let her take her time with it, then."
Harry blew air between his lips in a sort of impatient way. "She hasn't got time to be like this."
Remus said nothing, and started clearing the table, which the others had left scattered with empty cups of tea. Harry sighed and began helping him.
"You think I'm being mean or something, don't you?" he asked Remus, finally.
Remus paused, Moody's cup in his hand. "I think that you're being too hard on her. She's split between two worlds and two loyalties, Harry, this can't be easy for her. And you're supposed to be her friend. You should be encouraging and sympathetic, not impatient and angry."
"I'm not angry!" Harry exclaimed, hurt. He grabbed the remaining cups and stormed into the back, resisting the urge to throw them into the sink.
"You're angry now," Remus said, following him, a hint of laughter in his voice.
"Yeah, because you're being a berk," Harry said back, throwing a dish rag at him.
Remus laughed. "You sound like James."
Harry jokingly rolled his eyes. "Seriously, though... maybe you should go and talk to her."
Remus gave him a look. "You've already spoken to her and she said she would talk to me. Just leave it at that. I had best friends, too, you know. And there are some things that they need you for, and there are other things that you just need to back off of and let them alone, no matter how much it hurts you to see them suffer."
Harry could think of nothing to say to this, so he instead starting soaping up some water.
"Why don't you get on to bed, Harry," Remus suggested. "I can handle the dishes."
Harry shrugged. "Because I don't have anything to do tomorrow, besides what I do every other day. Get up, eat, shower, read, eat, practice, read, eat, read, go to bed.. It's not like I need to rest up for anything. Besides... if you're not going to be lazy and use a Scourging charm, I might as well help you. It's my house, and I'm not about to have one of my friends clean it up for me." He gave Remus a wicked grin. "But I'll only help if you promise not to try and talk me out of dropping out of school again."
The werewolf sighed. "I am only concerned for your future."
"So am I. That's why I'm not going. And I have enough people worrying about me without you getting in the mix."
"You're James and Lily's son, and a friend to me. I can't not worry about you."
Harry started scrubbing the dishes and handing them off to Lupin, who began drying them with the rag that Harry had thrown at him.
"Speaking of my parents," Harry began, "I've decided to go to Godric's Hollow."
Remus paused but waited for Harry to finish.
"In fact, since I'm not doing anything but the usual, and Ron and Hermione are here for the weekend, I think I'll do it tomorrow."
Remus almost dropped the tea cup. "You most certainly will not. Not after what happened on Privet Drive."
"Weren't you just saying a few minutes ago about how the three of us are of age and you can't stop us from doing anything anymore," Harry pointed out. "I thought if anyone could understand me going there, it would be you. I never knew my mum and dad. I want to see where they lived, and see where they're burried. Visit them." He turned back to the dishes. "It's not up for discussion, Remus. I'm going. Ron and Hermione are probably going to want to come, too, which is fine. I want them there."
"Why did you bother telling me at all if you won't allow me to talk some sense into you?" Remus snapped. Harry blinked in surprise. It wasn't often that Remus Lupin lost his cool.
"Because I wasn't just going to go trekking off and not tell anyone. Besides, I need you to give me directions."
"Harry, it is too dangerous-"
"Remus, walking out my front door and taking a turn around the corner is dangerous!" Harry said, exasperated. "I know Voldemort's after me, okay? I get that. He's kind of been after me for the past seven years. Well, seventeen, really, if you want to get technical. I will not hide in here forever. I have to get out. I have to destroy him. And to do that, I kind of need to leave Grimmauld Place once and I while and risk coming face to face with him. You can't keep me safe anymore."
Remus clenched his jaw and began drying the dishes again, albeit with more force than was probably necessary. "You shouldn't put Ron and Hermione in danger as well."
"You're absolutely right. Pity they won't listen to me."
"Well, now perhaps you understand where I'm coming from."
Harry could not deny that he had a point.
"If you insist upon going to Godric's Hollow, at least try not to be so rash about it," Remus said after a while. "Don't go tomorrow. Take a day to plan or something. Ron and Hermione don't return to school for another couple of weeks. Why not do it next weekend?"
"Because, I've waited long enough. It's time I started-" Harry stopped, taking a breath to steady the flip flops that had suddenly started happening in his stomach. "It's time I did what I needed to do. I'm far from ready. But I can't put it off any longer. I want to see my old home, and visit my parents graves before I start. It's just something I have to do. And I'm sure I could find the place on my own, but that would take more time, and I'd much rather you help me." He turned to face Remus, who was regarding him sadly. "I'll take my father's cloak if it will make you feel better. We won't come out from under it until we reach the house." If there's even a house left, Harry thought.
Remus said nothing for a long time. He finished drying the dishes and put them in the cupboards. Harry sighed, and began to make his way out of the kitchen.
"Night, then," he said before starting up the stairs.
"Take the Knight Bus, don't Apparate," Remus said, suddenly. "And I think it best we not tell Molly what the three of you are up to."
Harry turned around to see Remus looking at him with that same sad expression, but also with pride.
"Yeah, I think you're right," Harry agreed, smiling genuinely. "Thank you."
Remus nodded and put a hand on Harry's shoulder, squeezing it lightly. "Just come back in one piece, Harry. That's all I ask."
----------------
The next day came, and with it Ron, Hermione, and Ginny's Hogwarts letters.
"Have they got a new Defense the Dark Arts teacher?" Harry asked, looking over Ron's shoulder at his book list. They were sitting around the kitchen table eating breakfast.
"Seems like it. They'll have to have gotten a new Transfiguration teacher as well, and a new Gryffindor Head of House," Ron answered.
"I heard McGonnagal talking last night," Hermione told them. "The positions have been filled, but she's not entirely happy with either of them. There were hardly any applicants at all, and enrollment is down horribly."
"Maybe I'll have the dorm to myself this year," Ron said, nibbling a piece of bacon. "If I decide to go, that is."
"Your mother has already told you you're going back go Hogwarts or she'll have your head," Hermione said to him, sharply.
"I don't care what she thinks!" Ron said back, hotly, his ears going read.
Before an argument could progress, Harry told them, calmly: "I'm going to Godric's Hollow."
The both of them turned and looked at him sharply. "What?" Hermione asked. "When did you decide this?"
"Last night. I spoke to Remus, and he wasn't too keen on the idea, but he agreed to give me directions so long as I use the Invisibility Cloak and come back in one piece."
"Don't you mean 'we'?" Ron asked.
Harry grinned. "Well, yeah, but I didn't want to speak for the two of you."
"Don't be stupid! Of course we're coming."
"We won't let you go alone, Harry," Hermione added. "It's much too dangerous. Something terrible could happen."
"My mum is going to go ballistic," Ron muttered.
"Remus suggested that we, er, not tell her."
Ron brightened at this idea, but Hermione looked aghast. "We can't do that!"
"Sure we can," Ron said, waving his hand dismissively.
"I will not lie to your mother, Ron."
"It's not lying. It's not telling her what we're doing. So, when are we off?"
Hermione was still glaring reproachfully, but she didn't say anything else.
"Either this evening or tomorrow," Harry told them.
"Bloody hell! That was quick!" Ron said, folding up his letter. "We'd better get a move on. What should we do to prepare?"
"Probably just go over all our spellwork, because I have a feeling we're going to run into some trouble. Now that I'm of age, I'm sure I won't be able to leave this place without being followed or attacked," Harry sighed.
"Have you told Ginny?" Hermione asked.
Harry blinked. "No. Mainly because she's not speaking to me."
"Ginny doesn't need to know either. You saw her after we got back from Hogwarts the last time," Ron pointed out.
"Ginny doesn't need to know what?"
The three of them whipped their heads around to see the youngest Weasley coming down the stairs still in her bathrobe. She saw Hermione reading her letter and asked, "They came? Is mine down here somewhere, too?"
Harry located it on the table and handed it to her.
"Thanks. What don't I need to know?" she asked again.
"That Ron's still not sure whether he's going back to school," Harry said, quickly.
Ginny poured herself some orange juice and sat down. "Oh, he's going. Mum said she'll disown him if he doesn't."
"She's just talking, Ginny," Ron argued. "She wouldn't do that, not after what happened with Percy."
Ginny just shrugged and began opening her letter. As she pulled out the parchment, something gold fell out and onto the table with a clinking sound. Everyone stared at it.
"You're a prefect?" Ron said, disbelief etched in his voice.
"No, they hand those out in fifth year," Harry reminded him. He picked it up, just as Ginny started reading her letter.
"I've been made Quidditch Captain," she said, breathlessly. Harry looked down at the pin in his hand for confirmation. Sure enough, it looked just like the one he had received the year before.
"What? You mean if I get Keeper again, you're going to be in charge of me?" Ron sputtered. "That's bollocks!"
"That's wonderful!" Harry exclaimed. "Ginny, congratulations, I knew you'd get it."
Ginny gave him a half-smile. "Thanks... we'd much rather have you back on the team, but... I'm Captain." Her smile grew wider and she jumped up from the table. "I have to go tell Mum and Dad!" And she ran out of the kitchen and up the stairs.
"I have to take orders from my sister," Ron groaned. He grabbed the remaining bacon, eggs, and sausage and piled them on his plate.
"Ron, what on earth are you doing?" Hermione asked.
Ron sighed in a dramatic way. "I eat when I'm depressed."
The three of them burst out laughing.
"Seriously, though," Harry said, grabbing some eggs for himself off of Ron's plate. "You all really want to go?"
"Didn't we tell you we'd be there at Dumbledore's Funeral?" Ron reminded him. "Of course we're coming. Right, 'Mione?"
Hermione nodded. "Of course."
For some reason, Harry felt his eyes start to sting. He couldn't for the life of him figure out why he was getting so emotional. "I don't know what I would do without the two of you," he said, softly.
Hermione blushed, but Ron shrugged, grinning at him. "Well, you'd probably have more food," he said, and shoveled a heap of eggs into his mouth.
I'm sorry this has taken to so long to get out. RL has been very hectic, but as most of it is personal, I won't go into details. However, I think most of it has sorted itself out, and we're getting to the good bits of the fic now, so updates should be more frequent.
I also wanted to dedicated this chapter to my baby sister, who has been my beta and who bugged and bugged me to write this, because apparently she's as much into it as my readers.
