Heads up, puke inducing scene in the beginning. I kept it minimal and things are getting good.

Chapter 7 I Should Have Known Better

Dylan lifted his feet one by one up the spiraling staircase of the beach house. After he left Iris and the hotel he had driven up Mulholland again and tried to clear his head. It didn't help much considering Mulholland always reminded him of Brenda. He wasn't sure if it was because she always noticed the beauty of the city or all the times they had spent up there making out in their teen years but even the smell reminded him of her. Dylan had no idea what he was doing and he didn't want to admit that his mother, the one he had always laughed at and rolled his eyes at her eccentric outlooks on life, had hit it on the nose. Dylan had spent his whole life being alone, he had spent most of his energy pushing people away. Now that he was older, and he thought about settling down, it was hard to think about anything else because he didn't want to get back to that place. He didn't want to be alone and he didn't want to push people away anymore. Dylan had always thought that he was strong, in the grand scheme of things anyway. He may have been weak with his addictions but he had gone through a lot of hardships and he had overcome them, for the most part. Why was it so hard to run back to her? Why after Brenda had her time on tour to cool down hadn't he gone back on his knees begging that he was sorry? And now, he was about to marry someone else…someone that he loved but he wasn't sure what that love actually meant. His feet felt heavy as he walked slowly up that staircase. He had dreaded coming home at all but figured if he had showed up at the hotel at Iris's door that he would have to listen to her talk about what was off and what was missing from him and Kelly. She would nonchalantly drill Brenda into his mind when in reality Dylan wanted to take her out of it. It would make him feel less guilty about Kelly and maybe would make him actually excited to move towards something.

He took a deep breath and slowly unlocked the back door. He saw her sitting on the couch in silence. He knew she was busy in thought and at that moment Dylan kind of wished he was listening to Iris and not about to talk to Kelly.

He slowly closed the door and started taking off his jacket one arm at a time. "Hi." He said quietly as he laid it on the chair in front of him.

"Hey." Kelly said equally as quiet.

They looked at each other and didn't say anything for a moment.

"Where have you been?" Kelly broke the silence first.

"I was with Iris…then I took a drive." Dylan looked down and found himself kicking his foot slowly acting childish and shy.

Kelly's voice turned curt, "We have to talk about this Dylan…this isn't something we can just ignore."

Dylan nodded, "I know." He slowly moved sitting in the chair he was standing in back of. He had chosen it wisely, out of swinging arms and slaps…not next to her.

"What are we doing Dylan? I just feel like your not here, your mind is somewhere else. Are you having second thoughts about marrying me?"

Dylan saw the tears beginning to form in her eyes and it did break his heart. Dylan looked down it was something he never got used to, having women break down in front of him, it almost made him defensive. Instead he began with honesty, "I am." He looked back at her waiting for the storm.

Kelly swallowed hard, "Why?" she said sadly.

"Its not you Kel, I just have been thinking a lot about everything. You know me…commitment wasn't always my strongest suit."

Kelly slowly lowered her face into her hands. Dylan looked at her with sadness; this wasn't going to be easy for complete honesty. He wasn't saying he wanted to call it off. He moved next to her and wrapped his arm around her in which she turned to hug him. "Kelly…I didn't say I didn't want to marry you, I just said I had a lot on my mind." He comforted her.

She looked up slowly, "You didn't?"

"No…I paid the deposit." Dylan said hoping that would make her feel a little better. "You just have to be a little patient with me Kel, if anyone had a future as a bachelor for life it would have been me."

Kelly nodded as she wiped under her nose, "So…the wedding is still on?" she asked cautiously.

Dylan nodded, "It was never off."

Kelly smiled at him and they leaned in and pecked each other briefly. As Kelly leaned out she smiled lightly, "How was Iris? Is she excited?"

Dylan lowered his arm off her shoulder and almost laughed, "Oh…yeah…she is great…" Dylan wasn't about to tell Kelly Iris wasn't jumping for joy.

Kelly didn't seem to notice he hadn't answered her question and got up, "I am going to take a bath…want to join me?" She looked at him flirty.

Dylan lifted his hand, "Sounds more than tempting Kel but I am just going to lay down. I have a headache." He lied.

Kelly smiled and gave him a nod. She hadn't remembered the last time Dylan had refused to join her in the tub so she figured he must really be in pain. She turned and moved toward the bathroom leaving Dylan with more thoughts. He instantly regretted the conversation, nothing had really been talked about, nothing had been straightened out. There was no doubt in his mind that he was settling and Dylan felt like a complete asshole for being such a coward. What the hell was his problem? Why couldn't he get her out of his head? Was he really still in love with her? Or was he in desperate need of closure?

**

Another week had past and Brenda's plane was taxing into to LAX airport. She had been fine the whole flight until Billy decided to fall asleep on her shoulder. Billy was an actor who had insisted he sit next to her, he insisted on carrying her bags for her, he had asked her out a million times and was hopelessly obsessed with her. He was kind of cute, short though and Brenda only thought of him…well as a total annoyance. As the plane eased up slowly to the terminal there was a small bump and Billy's arms moved around her waist as he cuddled into her. Brenda held up her hands sort of disgusted.

"Uh…Billy." She nudged him, "Uh." Brenda tried to shove him now.

Jared smiled at her, he was Brenda's costar and he was sitting across the aisle from her. He got up smoothly knowing the plane hadn't come to a complete stop yet. "Alright buddy, nice try." Jared pulled Billy away from Brenda.

"Oh…sorry…I must have dozed off." Billy said rubbing his eyes.

"I am sure." Jared said shaking his head as he moved to sit back down in his seat.

Brenda looked at him and smiled. "Thanks" she mouthed.

He smiled back at her and gave her a nod. Jared was sweet, handsome, totally buff and completely not interested in her. Brenda looked back down as the nervousness hit her as the plane came to a stop, she was here, she suddenly felt nauseous. People swiftly started getting up pulling bags down from above acting like they were actually going to rummage out anytime soon. Brenda slowly bookmarked her book; she would have to read the page over again because if she was actually reading it she hadn't absorbed it. It was fiction, very imaginative about mystical vampires and it wasn't normally what Brenda would have read but it was given to her by her neighbor Beth and she embraced it thinking anything other than romance would be good. Well note to self, Brenda thought, Kill Beth. The book was a love story and just to rub salt in her wounds, it was a love triangle book. She found it rather good and now she didn't want to carry on with it but it captured her within the first couple chapters. Brenda shook her head as people did finally start filing off the plane. Brenda waited for people, she wasn't in a hurry, she didn't even have anyone to pick her up. She wanted it that way. As the last person filed off the plane she stood up and noticed Jared had done the same thing.

He smiled at her and raised an eyebrow. "Guess we both weren't sure where the fire was huh?"

Brenda smiled back, "Yeah…I am in no hurry." She got up and turned her back towards him as she lifted her smaller suitcase from above.

"Yeah me neither…let me help you with that." Jared got up quickly and helped her lower it to the ground.

Brenda looked at him oddly, what was his problem? He had never really talked to her before. They had kissed, they shared scenes but besides being married in the play, he had never given her much more than a few glances. "Thanks?" Brenda didn't know why it came out in a question.

"No problem." He let her lead the way out of the plane.

As they got into the terminal he continued to walk with her, "So…want to share a cab to the hotel?" Jared said nonchalantly.

Brenda was even more set back, "Ah…that would have been nice actually but I am not staying at the Beverly Wilshire."

"Oh…why not?" Jared looked disappointed.

Brenda noticed, "Um…I used to live in L.A. I just felt more comfortable at the Beverly Royale." She kept her answer short.

"I see…you are a rebel aren't you? Trying to be different? You like to be unique...or...maybe just completely anti social." Jared smiled again showing his perfect white straight teeth that Brenda couldn't help looking at.

Brenda playfully shrugged, "I don't know…I just like it, I guess."

They had come to the baggage claim now and stood silently waiting for their luggage. Brenda glanced quickly up at Jared, she was so confused. She had been working on this play for months and had known of him for years and even though she had thought he was handsome he never talked to her. Why now? Brenda noticed her bag. She moved quickly but felt Jared's hand graze hers when he lifted her bag effortlessly off the carousel. She pulled it back quickly.

"Thanks again?" Brenda laughed, "I am not used to all this gentlemanly things…you're spoiling me" Brenda joked. She looked down quickly, was she flirting with him?

Jared just smiled at her with his perfect teeth and dimples. He was tan, maybe Greek or Italian. He had big green eyes and she was jealous of his dark rich eyelashes that were long and sexy. She watched him grab his bag quickly, "Do you have any more?" he asked.

Brenda caught herself looking at his arms. They were perfectly toned and outlined. He wasn't too muscular but just enough. "Uh…no that's it." She shook her head hoping he hadn't caught her. Brenda had fantasized about having a date to Kelly and Dylan's wedding, someone who was just as sexy and incredible looking as Dylan. She of course in her fantasy was over him and she pictured herself walking in with confidence with someone like Jared on her arm. Making Dylan wish he hadn't left and making him squirm at the sight that she was someone else's Bren, not just his. But it was just a fantasy, having someone like Jared to take to the wedding wouldn't take away the fact that she wasn't over Dylan. The fact that she might have this hot stud on her arm didn't take away the fact that she was suppose to be Mrs. McKay, she was suppose to be the girl on the alter or on the beach or wherever her and Dylan decided to get married, in the beautiful white dress. She had fantasized about that so many more times and regardless of how much satisfaction it would bring her to stroll in their with that confidence and replacement hunk on her arm. It didn't give her Dylan and being in L.A. again was just making it that much more real and sadly…she hadn't even exited the airport yet.

"Bren?" Brenda's attention shot up hearing a guy call her by her nickname, someone other that her brother. Jared smiled bigger, "I can call you Bren.. right?"

Brenda nodded her head quickly snapping out of it. "Oh… yeah…of course, sorry just spacing out. Instant jet lag." Brenda let out an uncomfortable laugh. "What did you say?"

"I was just wondering…if maybe I could get your number? Since we won't be at the same hotel…I have never been to L.A. so any recommendations for drinks, or food, or if maybe you want to go with me…whatever…" Jared looked down shyly.

"Oh." Brenda said surprised, "Sure…of course." Brenda began digging in her purse. He instantly handed her a piece of paper and pen.

She smiled and quickly jotted down her cell handing it back to him. "Here you go…I would like that." She said softly.

"Good." He smiled, "Here's mine." He handed her the lower half where he had ripped after jotting his down.

Brenda took a deep breath looking down from his gaze, "You know…I am surprised…we have been working together for a while now and this is maybe like the first time you have ever talked to me." Brenda laughed shyly.

Jared too looked down embarrassed as he kept his smile and pursed his lips together with a nod, "Yeah…I am kind of shy but I actually asked around a little about you."

"Asked about me?"

"I thought you were married, I remember seeing a wedding ring on your finger when we did Much Ado About Nothing a few years back, but I asked around and found out that you weren't...so I thought why not."

Brenda swallowed hard, "Ah…right…of course." Her smile faded.

"Unless you were going out with Billy…then I may have to challenge him to a brawl." He said joking trying to change the awkward silence that had surrounded them.

Brenda let out a laugh; it did help the silence, "Nice a little theater humor and that would be a no."

They both shared a laugh as they found themselves in the taxi line. One pulled up quickly and Jared was in front of her in line. "Um…is the Beverly Royale close to the Beverly Wilshire?"

Brenda nodded, "Yeah about a couple blocks."

He reached out and touched her hand, "Well come on, my treat…we can drop you off first…no point in spending money for no reason."

Brenda hesitated and then shrugged giving in, "Ok…that sounds good." The taxi driver went to take her bags but Jared had already scooped them up and started lowering them into the trunk. He returned opening the door for her, "Mmm…again spoiling me." Now she knew she was flirting.

"Hey…I am the oldest of 4 and the only boy. That's one thing I was taught at a very early age. Romance them and spoil the hell out of them." He joked.

Brenda felt her face flush as he scooted in next to her. She knew they both had kept their gaze a little too long. They finally looked straight ahead as they took off. Maybe this secret trip to L.A. didn't have to be lonely. Maybe Jared could make her forget about what was happening in a couple weeks, if only temporarily. It was a hell of a lot better than moping in her hotel room.

**

Brenda found herself looking over her shoulder every time she had left the hotel. It was silly and now it was getting dark and she was slightly tempted to keep her sunglasses on while in the hotel but decided that was ridiculous. She was making her way home from the theater. Her first performance was the following night and she wanted to drop off some of her things so she didn't have to worry about it. The doors opened on her floor and she began to fish through her oversize purse looking for her key. She walked slowly with her head down and stopped suddenly not being able to find it. She heard a familiar voice.

"Brenda?" Iris said slowly and dragged out.

Brenda's heart stopped and it may have actually dropped out of her butt, her hand draped in her bag dead and numb. She slowly looked up staring straight ahead not turning around. Her heart began to beat again, almost jump starting and then she felt like it was about to rip our of her chest.

"Brenda honey…is that you?" Iris said again as she stood outside her door.

Brenda closed her eyes, squeezing them shut. She swallowed hard and turned slowly toward the voice she knew almost as well as her own mothers. She wanted to cry, of course Iris would be at the Beverly Royale, she knew it was her favorite and even worse she was in L.A., she was in L.A. for his wedding. She felt light headed, she stared at her for a minute and saw Iris smiling at her with big eyes, she was maybe five feet from her. She tried to swallow the excess saliva that was building in her mouth. She started to smile but dizziness came over her and then…it went black.

HEHEHE lol lol lol REVIEW! Sorry about the K/D beginning but do you even think they talked about anything? I meant for it to be a scene like them, pointless and stupid lol Anyway I needed them to get back together so to speak. Let me know what your thinking.