Please don't kill me after reading this chapter lol. Things will get darker. Reviews are welcome and help me write faster, cause I feel more preasured to write next chapter :)

XXXX

The physical and sexual union at this stage of the dance is like one's first love –it is idealized and concretized and evaporates after the projections onto the opposite sex are destroyed or the honeymoon ends. But it is the first sense of a conjunction/union and a person's first experience of a possible wholeness and reunion with the One. 1)

The union of the Logos Self with the Eros Self, hidden in the deepest realms of the unconscious 2)

x

When you're having beautiful dreams you don't want to wake up. You want to stay in that magical garden watching the sakura petals fall. You want to continue forever looking into that dark grey eyes looking at you…

"Rise and shine sleepy red head!" I wake to the giggles of Matsumoto worrying me to get up.

I open one eye to realize she is practically hovering over me.

"Hey, just leave me alone. I'm the boss here, I can wake up late!"

"Fine, but just look what I found outside! I guess someone left it there for you. It's a present from an admirer, I'm sure of it!" she squeals while blinking one eye.

I consider for the first time the package she's been holding. A tiny box with my name written across the brown paper in a very beautiful letter. I take it carefully from her hands.

"Well, aren't you going to open it?"

"Yeah , sure, as soon as you leave the room!" I tease her.

"Oh , c'mon, you're being mean! I want to know what your secret admirer gave you!" she pouts.

"Get lost already!" I yell playfully at her.

She gives me one last disappointed look and then she giggles and disappears into the shop. I look for brief moments at the package and then I open it. My heart stops when I see what is inside.

A white dragon scale!

With shaky hands I grab the shiny piece and stare at it in owe for nearly half an hour. I guess Zabimaru is just as lost as I am because she just stands looking at it with me. The scale is pentagonal and shaped like a teardrop. One of the faces is smooth and cold like glass but the other face, probably the inner face, is smooth and harm like velvet.

"What the hell…" I finally manage to say.

"Who…do you think it was the dragon himself? Kisuke? "

"No, Kisuke would have sent a message with it. I don't know, this is just…"

"A blessing?" Zabimaru smiles.

"Yeah. I guess…But what to do now? Kisuke just told me to when I found one to put it inside the hojioku. Guess I should try it…"

" I suppose…"

I run for the closet and open a secret compartment inside. I never expected this day to come so soon! To complete this damned creation out of nowhere. I open the hojioku and place the scale in its core. I wait holding my breath for something shiny to happen, but then…nothing!

"Shit, this thing doesn't work!" I yell.

"Humph! What to expect from Kisuke?" Zabimaru declares, apparently also disappointed.

"You are being unfair" I turn. "Hum? Zabimaru? Where the hell did you go?"

"Baka, why are you yelling?" she speaks loud and clear on my mind.

"Stop playing games, I can hear you! Tell me where you are!" I demand a bit irritated.

"Where I should always be, with you…" again Zabimaru's voice resonates inside me.

"We're connected again? But…I can hear you!"

"Yeah, stop saying that. It's annoying"

"But I couldn't hear you before! Before the walking soul procedure I mean." Ok, I'm a little bit confused right now.

"Well, this seems to be a different state. But we can know again what you are feeling and thinking, Renji! We are complete again!" She speaks happily to me.

I feel my heart fill with joy as I hear my soul's words and laughter. I inevitably laugh with them.

"Yeah, I'm glad our nightmare is over. But man, it's going to be a pain to hear you all the time…but what a blessing not having to look at your ugly face anymore!" I tease. "Hey, stop that! I didn't know you could mentally kick me."

"So that you know, idiot! And why didn't you kiss that man last night Renji? We weren't sure, but now we can see that you love him…"

"Shut up! I don't want to talk about that. And you know why I didn't do it anyway, so why ask? God, you just love annoying me!"

Great, suddenly I think I got prone to headaches…

Xxxxx

I spent the day shaking. Although I'm not one to indulge in fear, the matters of the heart shake me to the ground and now that my heart is again open I fear what might come in. I decided earlier to make a quick search on the library about the word conjunctio. Apart the chemical process and the dubious metaphorical meaning to alchemists I found the concept rather harmless except…except for the part speaking of physical union…

That's why I decided earlier to ask Toushiro to lock me up in my room, despite how strange all situation sounds. But as the hours pass, a strange yet familiar feeling is pouring thru. At first it was similar to what I've felt last night when I saw the sorcerer enter the throne room. But as it grows, bit by bit stronger, it's even more different from the feeling I was left when Renji departed last night. As I lay on the bed feeling and hearing my blood rushing thru my veins, faster and faster, I realize with dread that what I'm feeling is becoming more animal by the minute. What did he say? A feral desire to conjunctio! Does this mean its happening? But I didn't meet anyone. Is it possible that he miscalculated the time? Because the person I want to…I mean I…I try to push this bad…lascivious thoughts out of my head but they keep returning to me. Crimson hair fills my line of vision and I frenetically brush my eyes to get ride of that colour. As the time stretches I can even smell him. What is this? What have that bastard done to me?

I start to believe he trick me. He put me under a spell to have me fall in love with him. No, it's not just love. I believe it was yesterday, but today is also… a carnal, sweet melting desire to have him, to consume him in every possible way. I need to control myself, the same can't happen again. Not again please! If he is the responsible for my state maybe he deserves no better, but…No, I need to stop this before is too late. Am I so weak that the poison will prevail? I feel Senbonzakura approaching…

"Please, no…" I murmur.

"I want to eat him! Let me Byakuya!"

Xxxxxx

Is dark outside and Matsumoto just left a few moments ago. I'm on the back room wondering if he will do as I told him to. I can't have guaranties. And I may never know. A cold feeling is revolving inside me, just like the one I felt last night, the one that finally forced me to ask him to stay in his room. I don't want for him to be with anyone else. But I want him to be happy and I know we are worlds apart. Plus, I have another problem to deal with. Now that Zabimaru is apparently gone Aizen will know that I reversed the walking soul process and that I have the hogioku. I should have departed as soon as I completed Kisuke'stone this morning, but I can't leave without knowing that the Moon is alright. Besides, it still bothers me not knowing who send me the scale and what happened to the White Emperor. I need to know that this… partial completion I'm feeling is not due to a creature sacrifice. I intend to stay in Rokungai despite the consequences. That's why I immediately send a message to Kisuke this morning, asking him to come.

I'm thinking about all this when suddenly Zabimaru screams on my head. A sound like something heavy crashing in the backyard rushes me outside. As I step into the night my breath catches frozen on my throat. Not because of the cold, but because of him. The White Emperor is standing right in front of me and although they say the white are the smallest of dragons he is still huge and splendorous. An aura of coldness seems to emanate from him. I notice his wide feet surrounded by white scales resembling fur and the sharp claws. The other scales covering his body are reptile in appearance, except for the ones covering the extended broad wings. These last ones seem more like fluffy feathers. But they all shine a blinding white under the moonlight. I search the dragon grey eyes above the sharp white teeth but they don't seem human anymore. I'm standing in front of a wild untamed creature and he seems eager for blood.

Adjectives that cross my mind:

Majestic

Beautiful

Lethal

"Abarai Renji" he roars and his deep voice shakes my bones. "You will pay for what you have done!"

He shifts his weight getting closer and I notice he is bleeding from a hound in is middle thorax, right below the right wing. The red blood is like a flag in the snow of his body. He catches me looking at it.

"Happy for having one of our scales? Happy that you deceived my master as to retrieve one from our flesh, in order to give it to you? Are you already the happiest man alive?"

"Your master?" I ask shocked.

"The man you tricked with you potion. He may have succumbed to your poison but before he faint unable to leave the room, I swore to him I was going to avenge him."

"Kuchiki Byakuya? He is your master?" I ask in disbelief.

"Don't speak of him like you know him mongrel!" he roar again and I can feel his cold mint breath on my skin.

"I didn't mean to make him harm. That's why I worn him yesterday. If he stays in his room a little longer everything will be back to normal tomorrow. And as for your scale I didn't know, I…"

"You wanted for him to feel desire, to succumb to you in order to give you one of our scales…" He speaks with disdain and…hurt?

"No, I …"

"So if is conjunctio you are seeking I'm going to deliver it to you. Don't worry, because you will not live long enough to feel pain" I can see liquid mercury revolving in his cold eyes.

"What? What the hell are you talking about?"

"Renji" Zabimaru voice echoes all thru my body "Leave this to us."

I start to feel dizzy and feel like thousands of butterflies are kissing my body. The dragon doesn't seem so big anymore and I can catch a surprised look on his eyes as he advances towards me. When I search my hands I only see Zabimaru paws on the ground and a snake head looking preoccupied at me.

"What the fuck is…"

"Renji, rest now!" The snake Zabimaru urges me.

I faint as the White Emperor grabs my body, Zabimaru body, with one of his furred paws…

I'm dreaming that I'm flying high in the sky. I ear wing-beats. I'm scared but I'm also enjoying the speed and the rush of wind on my skin. I can also feel smooth, warm skin next to mine. The wing-beating then stops and I feel feathers surround all my body and leave me in the darkness. At the same time my head gets light from the free-falling and an unbelievable pain pierces my body…

1) Dance_and_

2)