Hello there! Here I come with a new chapter ^_^…not as long as the last one but with lots of love! And lots of closures…
Thank you to all the kind people who has left a review, that definitely helps me to keep going.
Arigato!
"And…what else?" Kanae asked.
"The doorbell rang and he had to go check who it was" Kyoko answered totally red-faced and embarrassed.
They were both in a karaoke booth in which they use to meet to talk. Kyoko had wanted to tell someone what had happened in the dressing room with Ren, but because she couldn't reveal the secret of Cain and Setsuka, she changed setting to be the house as opposed to the dressing room, filming to be Box-R practice, and changed Sae's entry to be just a visit at the door.
"He had to go?"
"It was important"
"Wait, let's leave that question for later. What I want to know is, how did you even reach that point? I mean, weren't you completely convinced that he wasn't in love with you?
"Well…the thing is…"
Kyoko told her the confession story about Shotaro and Ren's feelings, with the respective changes of time and place.
"Well" Kanae said "I told you so. It was too weird the way the acted when he was mad at you. It had to be either love or hate, and it seems to be the former." She pondered something for a few seconds and then asked "How are you?"
"What do you mean?"
"What do you feel for him? I imagine you do feel something, if not, you wouldn't have kissed him"
"I always, after a while of knowing Tsuruga-san, knew that I felt a great respect for him, but besides that, there was something I haven't allowed myself to feel since…"
"…since Fuwa, right?"
"Yes, and what I feel most right now is fear. I know that Tsuruga-san would never be capable of doing what Shou did but…I don't know. It's like a break, a barrier that I can't and don't want to see, Moko-san. I'm still very surprised at myself for what I let happen, and I don't want to do that kind of thing again until I'm completely sure of how I feel."
After a moment of silence, Kane spoke.
"Maybe it's Fuwa"
"Huh?"
"Maybe the barrier you don't want to see is Fuwa"
"I don't understand. I don't want to get revenge anymore or-"
"I wasn't talking about revenge. Look, you've known each other since you were kids, right? For better or for worse at some point in your lives you understood each other better than anyone. It's true he got rid of you but the feelings you held for him are not going to disappear overnight. Maybe you still feel something for him, it's just that your blind desire to crush him silenced it for a good while. Now that there's someone moving your heart, you're afraid." And after that she took a big sip of lemonade.
"That can't be…For Shou? After what he did to me? I'm not that crazy!"
"Are you 100% sure you feel nothing for him?"
Kyoko couldn't answer because she now strongly doubted herself.
"Well, that's my opinion. I have to go, I'll meet Hiou-kun to practice some scenes. See ya." She rose and tried to reach the door but she couldn't. A strong aura of confusion emanated from her friend making it impossible, so she turned around and put on a warm smile she rarely showed.
"It'll be fine, you'll see. Give yourself a little time to think about what you really feel. That, of course, depends on if you want to stop being Love Me n°1 member." After that last advice, she left.
Kyoko went to TBM that night; she was inside her Bo costume and was thankful for it, because her face only reflected the confusion and uncertainty in which she was drowning. When the work was done, Hikaru approached her.
"Kyoko-chan, Kyoko-chan, are you ok?"
"Why do you ask, Hikaru-san?" She was a bit surprised at his question.
"I don't know, the boys and I thought you were kind of absent. Your natural charisma wasn't there in today's show"
So after all, it leaked through.
"Um, I feel fine; I'm just a little tired"
"Then go to rest soon, so you'll feel more relaxed tomorrow"
"Arigato, Hikaru-san. Otsukare sama desu." (Good work/Thanks for your hard work)
Kyoko didn't go straight to her bicycle. Instead she remained wandering through the halls trying to clear all thoughts from her head: Ren's confession, Kanae's words, the dressing room kiss, her own feelings for Shotaro. Suddenly she stopped.
What do I feel for Shotaro?
"Ara, Kyoko chan?"
"Shouko-san!" It was Shou's manager.
"What are you doing here?"
Oh man, she doesn't know about my Bo job.
"Um…I came to…visit a friend" Couldn't I come up with a better excuse? "What about you, Shouko –san?"
"Shou had an interview today. For the release of the new album"
"He's here?"
"Yes, I was just about to bring him some water"
"Shouko-san…Do you think I could talk to him for a little while?"
Where the hell is Shouko-san? I'm bone-dry.
"Shou…"
"There you are. I was dying here"
"…you have a visitor."
Kyoko entered immediately after. Shou couldn't be more surprised and, inside, his ego and confusion grew.
"Why are you here? Were you looking for me in particular?"
"I was especiallylooking for you"
Both Shou and Shouko were dumbfounded at her answer. They knew how much she hated Shou and now there she was, standing in his door, so meek and submissive. What had happened to her?
"If you have time, I would like to talk to you"
"I'll wait in the car," Shouko said while closing the door after her.
Shou threw himself on the couch and drank his water.
"So? What do you want to talk about?"
She called for Shotaro and he was all ears. She had that effect on him when she used his full name, getting him to look at her in the eye. "I need to ask you a question, or maybe, several questions that I'll try to mingle together, but please," there was emphasis in her words. "I'm asking you to answer me truthfully."
She received a nod.
"Tell me…Why did you do what you did to me? Why did you throw me aside when you knew that all I thought about was you? That I loved only you? That I left everything behind to come here with you? What-?"
"I NEVER FORCED YOU!" exploded Shou as he stood. Each question bothered him a lot. "I never tied you down, gagged you or threatened you to come with me. You did it on your own free will!"
"True! But you can't deny that you knew how I felt about you, right? You knew I would've done anything you asked…"
"I never forced you…" he whispered angrily.
"Answer me this, then…" She stepped closer and forced him to look her in the eye again. "Did you bring me here only to be your servant? To clean after your messes? Did you ever, even for a single moment, feel something for me besides friendship?"
Shou was livid. He never imagined there will be a day she will come to complain about everything he had done. And for the other part, he felt guilty, he knew better than anyone how he had treated her…
"You made the cracks in my heart!"
The words resounded in his head and he wanted to tell her everything he felt, what she had been in his life after losing her…but Shou was who he was, and after looking at her, his inner demons battled in his mind.
Why should I answer her? It's good enough to monopolize her as I've always done; she already said I was her "prey". While my existence in her heart is still bigger than the rest of the world, that's fine.
He approached her, took her by the wrists and pushed her against the wall.
"Why don't you tell me the real reason you came here, Kyoko?" His ego had won. "Maybe you haven't forgotten the Valentine's kiss and came looking for more."
Kyoko blushed furiously and Shou thought it was because what he said was true. He didn't know the real reason she was blushing was because of the memory of a soft kiss on her cheek, a pair of coffee-colored eyes looking at her and a deep voice saying, "Thank you".
"You should've said that since the beginning and we wouldn't have lost time," he said as he began tilting his head and closing the distance between their faces. Kyoko didn't know what to do, her demons weren't reacting and neither did her body.
What do I feel for Shotaro? What do I really feel for him?
She remembered all the swirls of emotions that had been unbound since the day Ren kissed her and how the contact of his skin made her feel. In that moment she made a decision, and also tilting her head, she closed her eyes. Shou saw this and it seemed as if his heart started beating a mile a minute… One thing was to force a kiss on her, another one entirely that she was willing to do it.
Their lips found each other in a soft touch that rapidly escalated to be a lip-lock. Shou was trying to get Kyoko to open her mouth but she wasn't relenting.
He kept trying.
While she felt her childhood friend's advances, Kyoko realized that inside her was nothing. His kiss didn't make her angry, or made her heart beat faster. Her heart had only one face printed on it.
Ren…
Almost as soon as is started, the kiss ended. Kyoko turned her face to break the kiss and fought to free her wrists. It was an easy task, because Shou had lessened the pressure on them since the kiss had begun. She put her hands on his chest and pushed him.
"It's not you…not anymore"
"What are you saying?"
"That now I know what my true feelings are and you're no longer in any of them"
"What the hell are you talking about?"
She bowed and cheerfully answered.
"I'm truly sorry for this confusion. Please, forget that kiss. It never happened."
"Ha! Now you say that, but you'll soon come back for more, right?"
"Think what you like but I have to go. I have something really important to do." She turned around and left, rummaging through her purse for her cellphone.
"Kyoko! What the hell is wrong with you?" Shou grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into the hallway.
"Nothing is wrong and let go of me," she said, freeing herself from his touch. "I think that in a not-so-proper manner I have discovered a lot of things, and I'm sorry that only after I entered this world you decided to look at me for who I really am. Rest easy, I no longer want to take revenge on you." And bowing again she said good-bye. "Sayonara, Shoutaro."
Shou couldn't begin to understand what had happened in his dressing room. Two minutes ago they had kissed, and now she was saying good bye? He couldn't help but feel a small void inside himself.
"Pick up, please pick up…"
Kyoko was hastily walking to the bus stop to take a cab and was waiting for that voice to answer her phone call.
"Good evening, Mogami-san."
Kyoko was surprised at the mention of her last name, but soon realized that maybe he wasn't alone.
"Good evening, Tsuruga-san. I'm really sorry to interrupt you, I know well how busy your schedule is."
"Don't worry about it. Tell me… what do you need?"
"I…um…I…wanted to know if you have a moment to talk"
"When?"
"Now."
Ren was shocked and happy. This was the first time she had demanded something from him. Usually her answers were, "Whenever you see fit to attend your kouhai, Tsuruga-san! I couldn't impose on you!"
"I would love to fulfill your request, but I'm not in Tokyo right now"
Kyoko's world crumbled.
"Oh…I see"
The sadness in her voice was such that Ren had to stop the car and park to hide his face from his co-pilot, that was none other than Yashiro. The feelings were too much.
"Are you okay, Ren? Did something happen to Kyoko?"
"It's all good, Yashiro-san, give me a second," said Ren as he picked up the cellphone again. "Kyoko-chan, I'm returning on Sunday morning. My plane arrives at five a.m., maybe I can pick you up so we can discuss things over breakfast?"
"That would be perfect! Thank you very much! I'll see you on Sunday, then. Good night!"
"Good night."
Ren closed his cellphone and resumed the driving. He was so engrossed with the date he'll have with her on Sunday that he didn't pay attention to his manager's face…
"Reeeen?"
"Y-Yes, Yashiro-san?"
"Since when do you call Kyoko-chan by name?"
Damn it, I totally forgot about him and called her that way.
"I did? I didn't realize."
"Mmmmm…" Yashiro was too excited with the idea of them having breakfast together and started fantasizing about the idea of what will happen on Sunday.
It's best that I move some meetings for Monday. He thought with a bright face and sparkling eyes.
Sunday
Ren had parked his car in the airport's garage. It was 5:30am, and he had already unloaded all his bags from the plane.
It would be best for me to go home, leave this and go look for Kyoko.
"Yashiro-san, do you need a ride?"
"Oh no, Ren, don't worry. I can go by myself this time," he said with a grin that gave Ren the urge to kick him.
He went through the airport doors and to his huge surprise he saw a little carrot-colored head protruding among the people.
"Tsuruga-san!"
"Kyoko-chan? But… what are you doing here?"
He got a good look at her now. She looked so pretty in a jean skirt, low heels, accompanied by a shirt with pink ribbons and a yellow jacket.
"I thought that I could come and welcome you. Am I bothering you?"
An angelic smile extended through the face of Japan's most handsome man, eliciting a soft blush from Kyoko.
"Of course not, it was a great surprise. If you wish, we can go for breakfast right now."
"Actually, I would like to talk to you first. It's something that cannot wait."
Kyoko was serious and Ren could notice. After knowing her so long, he knew most of her expressions. He could tell that, whatever it was, it was important.
"Come with me, I know just the place."
They both said good-bye to a very thrilled Yashiro who had witnessed the whole thing, and then Ren drove them to a nearby park, parking the car by the gazebo. They got out and sat on the warm hood.
"From here you can see the sunrise and the sunset. It's truly amazing. This is one of my favorite places."
"I thank you for sharing it with me."
"Now tell me, Kyoko-chan. What did you want to tell me?"
"You told me you love me."
It was sudden, but Ren answered.
"Yes."
"But I still haven't given you an answer."
"You don't need to rush, I already told you that-"
"I was confused, just like you said, about my feelings for Shou."
The rage and the sadness took hold of Ren who got off the car and didn't dare to look at Kyoko while he thought she was about to tell him that she loved another man. Kyoko followed him down.
"Please! Please, just listen to me!"
"I'm sorry, Mogami-san, I just remembered I have work to do. I'll take you home."
"Ren!"
The mention of his name made him react and he turned, only to be surprised at the tears of the girl in front of him.
"I'm just asking you to listen, please…" He remained silent and didn't return to the car. He couldn't deny what she was asking. She wanted him to listen? He would.
I can't be such a coward. I'll listen and then I'll let her go.
"I went to talk to him because the words of a friend and your own made me doubt what I was feeling. I knew that my thirst for vengeance had blinded me for a long time, but going from that to loving him? It seemed so ridiculous." She tried to wipe some tears from her face and then took a deep breath. "We kissed."
Kyoko felt Ren's eyes drilling holes into her back and paralyzing her on the spot. The fury emanating from Ren was something he had never experienced, but she was resolved in beginning with the truth. Making fists with both hands, she kept going.
"I felt nothing. The kiss lasted a few seconds, but it was enough. I couldn't believe it, but the only thing I could think of was you. Your face and your smile kept floating in my mind while I felt absolutely nothing for the person in front of me. The person I pushed aside."
Ren calmed a little bit, but he was still too furious to talk.
"There's something more that I must know, and you need to answer. Weren't you in love with someone else?"
Ren looked up confused.
"A 16 year old girl, the person which you thought of constantly but couldn't come to tell her your feelings?"
"You…how do you know about this? Do you know-?"
"Do I know Bo? Yes, I'm he."
The rage changed to astonishment while Ren felt his jaw hitting the floor. This girl in front of him was aware of his feelings since long ago but thought that he was talking about somebody else?
"I'm asking you this because I must confess that I'm scared," said Kyoko. The tears began to flow from her eyes again. "I'm terrified to feel this again for someone else, even worse if that someone is you. So tell me, weren't you in love with someone else?"
Kyoko noticed that Ren was slightly trembling. She thought maybe she had stepped out of line, that soon she was going to get a reprimand for her boldness. But seconds later she could see that Ren was only laughing.
Why is he laughing?
"Silly girl!" he said when he caught his breath. "Don' t you realize I was talking to the chicken about you?"
An arrow dropped from the sky and lodged in the center of Kyoko's heart.
"What I want to know is why you didn't tell me you were the chicken!"
"I didn't do it with ill intentions!" she said. "It's true that I hated you at the beginning, but then I got to know you, thanks to my disguise, and I could see the true you! And I knew I could support you and comfort you in that way. Being only a rookie, what right did I have to approach you and offer help? I just-"
"Kyoko," said Ren softly as he got closer to her. "You just confessed two things. One of them makes me really angry and the other one had me cracking up. Right now I can't believe that after listening to me as the chicken you haven't realized that I always talked about you!" Kyoko pouted. "But then, what I really want to know is why you told me all of this."
The time had come, it was now or never.
"I…for you…"
"Yes?"
"I love you."
He felt something going through his whole body. Was it happiness? Or maybe pure delight? There weren't words to describe what filled him up in that moment.
"What about your kiss with Fuwa?"
"It was stupid and horrible, but that was what made me come today to tell you my feelings. And if I was going to do it, I only saw it right to tell the truth from the beginning"
"Say it again."
"What?"
He gave her a look that seemed to wrap her in a fantasy dream. She hugged him the next time she told him her feelings.
I love you, Ren.
I love you too, Kyoko. Very much.
He took her by the hand, bowed and then looked at her straight in the eye.
"Mogami Kyoko, would you please accept to be my girlfriend?"
Kyoko start crying again, but this time they were happy tears.
"Hai!" was the only word she could muster in the middle of her sobbing.
"Please, don't cry anymore. I don't know what to do when you cry."
He cleaned her tears and took her face with one hand; with the other he pulled her close in what was their first kiss as an official couple.
The sun happily contemplated them and gave them its blessing.
