Note: Please note there is some minor gore in this chapter and a lot of angst!
Chapter: Qwark (aka Nurse Shannon)
I'm a hero. A fine hero with a very handsome chin, if I do say so myself … but let me just say that even with my good looks and wonderful acting skills, it's a hard time to be a hero. Not because I'm not dare-devilly dashing and dangerously deminare, but because those Lombaxes are show stealers! It's quiet simply really, when I was a tike, still swing tree to tree on my momma's back, the Lombaxes made their move like thieves in the night. They suddenly became the show stoppers of the heroes' realm, running into bad guy plots as if they were merely tripping over badly placed domes of evil …
I mean really those guys must have goggles that let them see the future, because I've heard that some Praetorian Guards literally tripped over evil-doers secret bases. It's just not fair! Because of them I nearly never got into the hero bis.
Yes, yes, my near-failure was all quite depressing and traumatic and I'm currently having a movie script written about it, but as I was saying: I nearly never made it to hero-dom if it wasn't for the assistance of my Benefactor. You see, after I failed multiple times to make a true arch nemesis (It really brings up the ratings, let me tell you) I just couldn't get anyone to sponsor me or my endeavors. Apparently, nobody wanted this thousand dollar smile and handsome chin, and quite honestly I was becoming desperate. I was actually looking at Thugs for Hire or … going back home to live with my mother! Egh!
And it's not that I don't love my adoptive monkey family but it's just that loincloths are not quite in this year … or any year for that matter.
But, as luck would have it, I got a message. It was a voice message so I never got to see the man's face but he had the most particular laugh to him. It sounded like a nerd's laugh more than a super villain's but he said something that I will never forgot. Something that made me almost tear up … and I will admit because of it I will do almost anything he asks of me. He said that I might make a lot of mistakes on the way but I was meant to be a hero … and a friend.
I still don't know entirely what he meant when he said that, my Benefactor can be that way … all mysterious like, but he has a way of knowing things. Kind of like those Lombaxes but he … just doesn't stumble on things. He knows things. He was the one that got me a radio show and my spice and cereal sales, and whenever I would thank him over the vid-phone he would always be all mysterious-like and say that the fame had always been mine. And then he would give me a warning about not letting it get to my head because it might not always be there blady-blah.
Please, what would I have to do for the public to hate this smug grin?
Regardless, I got a call one night; my Benefactor was worried … which was strange for him. He always seemed too smart and all-knowing-y for his own good sometimes. Anyway, he said that he had a personal hero-job for me, one that I had to handle with supreme miscreation … Ugh, I mean … discretion. Yeah, that word. Apparently, I had to rescue someone called Dan Johnson. No wait … wrong post-it note. Here we are. Ah yes, I have to rescue someone called Azimuth … or something like that.
Eh, should be easy.
….
"Oh my Qwark," I gasped as the door slammed shut behind me, the tray rattling in my hand as I entered the prisoner's hold. I almost got roped into giving another minion a back massage! Egh … nasty.
But I finally did it. I managed to sneak into the base with nothing but a lot of hip swinging and puppy-dog pouts. I always knew this Nurse Shannon costume would be handy and look at me now … I'm in a creepy … dungeon-like hold … in the dark … alone. Mega-Corp, it's creepy in here. I just hope the 'bandaging the prisoners boo-boos' lie was worth it.
What can I say … the costume came with gauze.
"Hey … who's there?"
"Ahhhhhh!"
I must admit … a rather girl scream did escape me.
But then I turned around, ready to take on whatever was in the darkness with my Crouching Kitten technique. Instead, what I saw was a Lombax coming to the front and towards his glowing prison bars. He looked emaciated and beaten down.
Honestly, I was surprised to see he was still organic. I mean … It was impossible to miss the war-ships that were currently guarding their home planets with a steely paranoia as I made my way across the galaxy. After all, entire planets were being frozen in time and no one really knew who was doing it. All anyone really knows is the madman's demands: everyone organic is to become a robot.
Stupid, right? And also, it's a risky procedure. What kind of super villain wants that anyway? Yeah, he probably wants to be an overlord or something to top it off but, really, what kind of overlord would want to rule that dusty Lombax planet, Fastooning or something. Apparently, it was one of the first planets to fall victim to the time-freezy-ray.
"Oh, you're a Lombax," I stated with a sigh of relief, noticing that a few more Lombaxes had come forward in their dim cages to look at me, about five in total. "I worried that you might be something that would try to eat my beautiful face. Though … what are you guy's doing here? I though your planet was frozen or something?"
Suddenly there was an explosion of voices from the uniformed Lombaxes (and one young, strangely un-uniformed Lombax), all of them crying out what I meant by that. I merely shrugged my shoulders and told them the recent news.
"Well, apparently there is some type of universal takeover plot going on by some type of evil scientist I never really caught the name to, Dr. Nincompoop or something, and I'm here to stop it," I finished with a dashing smile, though the young Lombax bit back at my proclamation.
"So … you're going to save the universe … in a nurse's outfit."
"Ratchet," bit back a Lombax that may or may not have been the teenager's father if looks were anything to go on, "Help is help. We are not in any position to be picky. We've been in here nearly two months as that mad man's bargaining tools all because you had to be rash and run off, without back up, to rescue your Uncle. I told you I was putting a team together to rescue him!"
"Great work dad," bit back the Ratchet fellow. "Your rescue team was super effective. After all … we all got imprisoned! I was doing just fine."
"You were trying to fight off an army by yourself," barked back the kit's father. "And the only reason we got captured was because we had to rescue you first."
"Yeah and now we don't even know if my godfather is alive! He called us for help and now he might be dead!" yelled back Ratchet as he rose from the cool metallic flooring to get into his counterpart's face.
"Don't take that tone with me, Ratchet," growled back the older orange Lombax and though I am a fan of reality television shows as much as the next person, I didn't have time for this.
Quickly interrupting what could have been a very entertaining cat-fight (literally), I stated, "Yeah, yeah, that's super entertaining and as much as I would love to watch you two claw out each other's eyes, I'm here to specifically rescue one of you. Now tell me which one of you is," I pulled out my sticky note and pronounced the name slowly, "Ass-er-moth-Azimuth! Yes, Azimuth. Which Lombax is it? Is it you? The young and beautiful one?"
The young technician blushed and tripped backwards at my devilish charm, murmuring, "N-no, I'm the team's technician. I'm Angela."
"Oh … well that's too bad. Any other takers? My Benefactor requested I bring them back. Well? No one? Oh well, I will let you guys out on the promise that you be my distraction," I said I wander over to what had to be the cage controls and yet I was interrupted on my secondary rescue mission when the 'leader' of the group spoke.
"Wait, how did you even know Azimuth was here? Why does your Benefactor even care? And, "the orange guy looked me up and down for a moment before he murmured, "Wait … aren't you Captain Qwark! B-but I always thought you were a fake, a fraud that somehow knew about spices."
I stared at the older Lombax for a moment trying to decide if that should be taken as an insult or not. In the end I got tired of holding my finger over the 'release' button and just hit it and turned to the released Lombax and his son as the other Lombaxes scrambled to find escape routes that did not involve the front door.
"Yes, to answer your question, I am Copernicus Leslie Qwark or you can just call me Captain Qwark," I stated with a pose.
Ratchet gave me an irritated look before he grumbled, "Can we just get captured now and save the mad doctor the trouble?"
Ratchet received a slap to the back of his head as the boy's father stepped forward, asking, "And what about the rest of our questions?"
"Oh well … I don't know much about my Benefactor. He's just always seemed to be there as if guiding me onto some path of greatness," I said as I looked up at the ceiling as if staring at the heavens before I came back to reality and added, "Nice guy, weird laugh, and he was the one that asked me to find Azimuth and bring him to him. I'm actually kind of excited about it. Part of me wonders if my benefactor is a retired super hero … or-or maybe a lost brother … or my birth parents."
I stood there for a moment, starry-eyed as Ratchet and his father stared at me with quirked eye brows. They both must have been curious as well!
"Uh, yeah … I see. And was he the one that told you to come here in a … nurse's gown?" asked Ratchet's father.
"Oh no, that was entirely my idea. Isn't it great! Nurse Shannon is my undercover name and with this map my Benefactor game me I'm half way there. I just came in here due to some rumors the minions were talking about and now I even have an escape distraction," I said, unable to keep the giddiness out of my voice.
At this point all the Lombaxes were staring at me with this open jaw expression. They all had to be in complete awe at this point.
Either way, the leader looked to his unit and nodded his head, "You have a map, you say? That might work. You see, we are looking for Azimuth as well and if you let me come with you to rescue Azimuth the rest of my unit will make sure we have an escape route."
"And then we blow this place up?" asked one of the seedy looking Lombaxes.
"Yes Mordecai. Then we blow this place up and save our planet … Oh and by the way," said the leader of the unit as he offered a hand to me. "My name is Kaden and this is my son, Ratchet."
For some reason, as I shook Kaden's hand I got the same feeling I usually do when I talk with Benefactor (who I nicknamed BF! It's witty, I know!), but I was not getting it from Kaden. Ratchet was the one giving off the vibe which felt like a mix of rage and good times like bubbles popping around in a bottle of Champaign. It was like I had met him before and though I knew our personalities were probably not compactable, I mean compatible, Benefactor's words echoed in my head:
You might make a lot of mistakes on the way but you were meant to be a hero … and a friend.
…
"I still can't believe you made me wear this," growled Ratchet behind me as his father walked at my side.
"Well, it was the only holo-guise our rescuer had, Ratchet, and you were the one that demanded to come along. Plus, you are the shortest … and youngest … and I'm your father," added Kaden with a grin behind his voice as he continued to walk at my side, trying not to chuckle.
Ratchet seemed flabbergast for a moment, though it was hard to tell with that plumber-guise on. It really was ingenious if I might say. My Benefactor sent me that holo-guise as a gift one year stating that I'd be surprised with how plumbers seem to be able to get anywhere. Kaden, on the other hand, had raided the recycle section and made a quick disguise out of old minion parts. After all, my routes involved main hallways instead of small, cramped vents as Ratchet had suggested over wearing the plumber-guise.
Regardless, we were almost there. Batting my eyelashes and swinging my hips had led us to a rumor about the power room and a lone Lombax. It honestly didn't make sense but we had checked three holding rooms already and we had yet to find Azimuth … so there was just the power room left and it was the room that powered the Time-Ray.
One fake 'excuse' later, we were allowed into said room and what I saw … I … It was not something I expected.
The Lombax we were looking for was there, sitting on his knees on the middle of the floor like a half dead thing, his tail lazily to his side and his head drooped as if he could barely sit straight anymore. The only light in the whole room seemed to be overhead and it illuminated the scene quiet barbarically, light glinting off metal. After all, there were these pointy metal rods extended from the still figure's crooked spine like acupuncture gone wrong. Some of his fur had even been shaved off his back for the insertion of what looked like metal plugs for the needles to enter. I might have thought the Lombax was dead if I couldn't hear his heavy breathing from all the way across the room.
Ratchet was the first one to react, choking on his breathy words as he dashed forward, "Alister … Alister!"
Kaden, his eyes wide, could only place a hand over his mouth as he started at the horror before him. Neither one of us had the heart to stop Ratchet as he ran forward to assist his godfather, a man he obviously cared for like a second father. And yet, just when he touched the other, a spike of white electricity jumped off of Alister's form and into Ratchet's body, throwing the young Lombax back with a dry cry. The teenager slid a few yards until he came to a halt, obviously … dead.
Or maybe he was just unconscious.
Kaden, crying out his son's name, ran over to his kit and quickly checked his pulse as he leaned down to check if his son was breathing. After few moments of panicky parental care, Kaden sighed and barked at me, "He's alive, look after him while I get Alister out of that contraption."
Slowly moving forward, I knelt down to check Ratchet over. I might make a great nurse but I really don't know much first aid so I felt like a complete idiot as I flattened out the unconscious teenager's form. He seemed alive but whenever I touched him, even with my rubber suit, I could feel this kind of electric jolt jump through me. It was weird, acidy and yet it reminded me of the weather after it rained. In fact, the whole room tasted like it.
"Alister … Alister, can you hear me?" asked Kaden as he slide to a stop a few feet from Alister's entrapment, dropping some of the metal pieces of his disguise since electricity of some kind was defiantly a problem here.
Tugging at the chains on his wrists slightly, Azimuth raised his head, his eyes hollow and his voice haunted, "Kaden … don't touch me. Please … I … I don't know what that metallic f-freak did to me but I can't turn it off. He keeps hurting people through me. P-please make it stop."
Alister then arched, painfully so as electricity seemed to jump off his skin and up the needles and through the cords that were attached to the large machine above our heads. Kaden looked like he was in pain as well as he watched his friend jerk slightly for a moment.
"I will, I will. Just let me figure out how to get your out. There has to be a way," choked Kaden after Alister stopped twitching. The orange Lombax was obviously losing his composure. Not that I blame the guy, I was doing my best not to even look at Alister … H-he looked so beaten down and mentally tortured. Had Nefarious really done this?
Yes … I knew that this was my old nemesis's ship but I was sure I was hearing the wrong name. He had always been such a pushover. He wasn't really the most successful kind of bad guy and yet here he was holding planets for ransom and torturing people. It seemed the only one that underestimated him … was me.
I doubt a sorry would not be sufficient nowadays if I got stuck in an elevator with that guy.
"That won't work," gurgled the grey Lombax as he shook his head. "It's inside me. It's part of me … It will kill people. I can't hurt Ratchet again. Not like last time. I won't hurt the Lombaxes again either. Please, just end it."
Watching from the sidelines, I noticed that Kaden didn't know if he should shake his head or nod it as he looked over the imbedded spikes. We both knew that there was no way to just tug them out of Alister probably would have already done it. For all we knew Nefarious had imbedded the spikes inside of the Lombax's form and over his spine… Egh, makes me twitchy just thinking about it. I hope my benefactor is okay with damaged cargo … if we even got him out alive that is. This isn't looking like a walk in the park anymore if you know what I mean.
"Just kill me Kaden!" choked the trapped Lombax as another swarm of electricity hurdled up his body, his words sounding like a sobbing-dry breath when he was able to breathe again. "He's making me hurt people I care for! I don't want to be the cause of our people's demise again! I-I … Please, just put me out of my misery."
I was really trying to pay attention to Ratchet but Alister's tone … I couldn't stop from tilting my head in their direction … it … I … an actor couldn't have put that much sorrow into his voice or that much heart break. Then again, how long had Azimuth been here? At least two months, if not longer.
Just what had my old nemesis done to him?
Kaden desperately looked at his friend for a moment, shaking his head, "No, no. The planet's frozen and from what I understand. It's not permanent. Everyone is not dead. I'll get you out of this contraption. Just remain calm, okay."
Alister choked on a sob and shook his head as Kaden stood up and walked around Azimuth's form, head back as he stared up at the large machine above us, his voice losing its reserved tone as his friend withered in pain again, chains tugging slightly as Kaden spoke, "Where is the power source … I-I don't understand what's shocking you. It looks like the energy is feeding out of you but that doesn't make any sense."
Another shock pressed down Azimuth's spine causing the poor Lombax to curl into himself, his words a whisper and yet they seemed so echoingly loud, "Please … I can't hurt Ratchet again."
Kaden stalled and threw me a look. I merely shrugged my shoulders and stated softly, "He's alive and breathing … and twitchy."
Frowning, the orange Lombax murmured, "He'll be fine. It's just and electric shock. You are fine and the electricity is running through you … so give me an idea on how to get you out of this?! Try to concentrate Alister. Ratchet will be okay."
Pressing his forehead to the floor, Alister's words were confusing and yet a part of me couldn't help but believe they were true, "Not that … Not that… that's not what I meant. You don't understand … I-I killed him, Kaden. At the Great Clock I took his life. I can't do that again. I can't let him die here, again. It can't be my fault, again. I was corrupted by that clock as punishment. I know it and I can't get rid of it. Please … just end it."
The Lombax then tilted his head back, revealing his sunken eyes and dulled fur, tears dripping down his face in a free expression of regret and inner hate and turmoil. Whatever was wrong with this Azimuth guy … it went deeper than current imprisonment and if I didn't feel tears prickling in the corners of my own eyes (I'm a big softy, okay), I might have thought his words would be perfect for a midafternoon drama.
"Please Kaden … I-I killed your son. I deserve to be punished by your hand. Please," he whispered, begging almost.
Kaden was shaking his head, confused, upset and frustrated, "Please stop! Please stop asking that of me Alister … I could never do that to you. A-and you didn't hurt anyone. You are probably dehydrated and in pain and hallucinating … but you haven't killed anyone. You have never hurt Ratchet. Ratchet is alive. He's not dead. Please, I need you to concentrate. Tell me how to help you out of this device."
"But I did," confessed Alister in the softest, most heartbroken tone, his voice almost equal to the confession than a dying man. I had to turn my head away because I refuse to cry in public. Just because Kaden looked like he was three seconds away from breaking down into tears … doesn't mean I have to.
Maybe … I … Oh, who am I kidding. I'm going to start crying if that Kaden guy breaks down. I can't help it. There's nothing wrong with my emotions! And I'm a hapless sympathy crier. Okay!
Kaden, while I was not wiping away tears, finally decided to just take action and threw his wrench, cutting the wires that led down to Azimuth. Glass and electricity rained down over Alister in a wave and when the wires attached to his friend's back finally stopped twitching, Kaden headed forward. And, in an action of complete bro-mance, he broke Azimuth's chains and placed his forehead against his friend's forehead in a form of comfort even though the grey Lombax was covered in blood and little glassy bits.
Staying still for a moment, whispering to calm his friend, Kaden then put Alister's arm over his shoulder and helped his friend stand, stating, "You will carry Ratchet."
And I did so. I wasn't going to say to that guy.
But I will tell you now … I know I'm not as smart as some people, despite my dashingly amazing self, but I will admit this: I don't know if I should be more curious about my benefactor or the heart-stricken Alister Azimuth. But I can tell you this: I'm sure I will soon get both of their stories … After we escape in a rain of gun fire and explosions that is.
Well, at least this skirt allowed me to bring in my favorite pistol.
XXX
Paw07: Ughhhhh … that chapter took forever. Qwark was fun to write though even if the end of this chapter was kind of challenging. I always kind of thought of Qwark as someone who is a big softy if he can get over his own ego long enough to notice. So I hope I didn't botch his character with all the angst. And about Angela, a reader requested a chapter for her but since I couldn't find a good time to throw her in with her own chapter, I decided to at least let her make an appearance. I always figured she was older than Ratchet and since she was likely raised on Fastoon, I figured she would stay with the planet for her first occupation … before she went off to try and make flesh eating pets that is. XD
Now, I think it's obvious but who do you think Qwark's benefactor is?
