Notes: Silvaxus; lol yeah well, ok. Here. Who doesn't love Gabe? :'D He'll show up again in ch.9, in case you were wondering.

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But Castiel wasn't there when Gabriel finally woke up.

Lucifer wouldn't admit it, but he was uneasy being inside that motel room, just the two of them. Gabriel laying on his side on the bed, and the Devil standing beside the window, trying not to look at his little brother the whole time.

He wondered how much more it would take Castiel to come back? He said he was going to talk to Sam and Dean about the situation, to let them know that Gabriel was going to wake up soon. That kind of conversation usually takes you just a few minutes, right? Then why is that, even after fifteen minutes have passed, he still hasn't returned?

Lucifer closed his eyes, releasing a soft breath. He was in his usual pose, arms crossed over his chest, the window beside him nearly to freeze up...

A sound made him slightly open his eyes, the bed in which Gabriel was sleeping, making a notorious sound as if the body above it, decided to turn and experiment a new position, and Lucifer doesn't dare to look back and over his shoulder to confirm his suspicion.

At least not until he was certain that Gabriel was indeed, awake. And that came out with the simple gesture of the youngest, making the notorious sound of a sigh.

"Should I ask what's going on around here?" And obviously, after having the Trickster speaking his mind out loud, of course. "Luci?"

The way Gabriel used to call Lucifer, had the Devil tensing up a little. The way he said it this time, it almost sounded like the youngest was trying to be sarcastic. Lucifer knows it wasn't appropriate to call him that way, not with how things unfolded the last time they faced each other. Unless Gabriel had forgotten? But no, he really doubts this.

Lucifer finally turned around to look at him, watching Gabriel with arms crossed over his chest as well, just like his legs, adopting this... casual posture over the bed, made him realize he was aware of everything, and that the younger obviously remembers. He still remembers.

"You shouldn't be the one asking that question, little brother." Lucifer then replied, his icy blue eyes soon shifting from the honey like color Gabe's eyes had, to the window again.

"Riiight," because he was unconscious and all that jazz. Gabriel turned his face to the opposite side, and narrowed his eyes. He didn't like the situation, that much was obvious, it feels weird having to face his older brother now. There is resentment, but also feelings all around. And the tension in the air, it was thick.

Lucifer is expecting Gabriel to say something, because that's just who he was. He talks when he is nervous, at least from what he can remember, and then his personality that just speaks by itself. Lucifer can also picture him trying to leave, anything that can help him to get away from him, and their current situation...

"Who found me?"

"How come you are back, and I could not feel your presence nearby?" Lucifer thought his question needed to be answered first.

"I asked first," Gabriel was standing from the bed, and Lucifer was furrowing his eyes at him, squinting a little. That was the clue for Gabriel to watch out his tone with him. At least, that's what the Trickster thought. "I-"

"Castiel." Lucifer replied first then. He didn't want to fight, not even for the slightest of things.

Gabriel blinked, and decided to calm down the tension on his face. Fair enough then, he should reply to the older's question now. "Seems to me you're underestimating me, bro..." But he had to tease him a little bit first.

"Gabriel..." The warning in his tone.

"Ok, fine. Geez," rolling his eyes, he even exclaimed with his hands. "I've no idea. I just woke up a couple of weeks ago, in middle of the forest." He tries to explain, "I was dead..." The comment made both feel uneasy, of course. "And then I wasn't."

The Morning Star remains silent for a short while, just staring at his little brother, not daring to approach him. "Do you think it was... Father, the one who brought you back?"

"I dunno, maybe?" He shrugs. "How is that you're walking free, by the way?" Gabriel furrowed his brows in question. "After all, the information I could get in the last days, said you were back in the cage with big ol' Mike."

"We were... I'm still trying to figure out what is going on." Lucifer replied, and then decided to go back into his questions. "Did someone attack you? Why were you unconscious?" Since Gabriel said he has been walking the Earth for a couple of weeks now, right?

"I... I'm not at my full strenght, apparently" that's the only explanation he had at the moment. "I blackout sometimes, it happened more often in the first week. It's weird even for me."

And Lucifer isn't sure what to think of that. He could try to get closer, and ask Gabriel to let him examine him better then, but that thing... He doubts of him letting him do anything. They weren't close like once before anymore, right?

That sure saddened the Morning Star, but he had to hide it.

So he stays quiet for a while... Until Gabriel couldn't stand the silence, again.

"Why are you here?" Gabriel doesn't understand. He thought Lucifer was mad at him after he dared to face him years ago, stepping in front for mankind and those pagan gods.

"Castiel wanted me to stay." He said, sincerely.

"Oh, so that means you want to get the hell outta here, right, Luci?"

Lucifer looked at him again, squinting his eyes. It seems his little brother didn't like the answer, maybe he was expecting to hear something else...?

"Were you expecting something else as a reply, Gabriel?" Lucifer tilts his head a little to his right. "Or are you going to deny you do not feel uncomfortable by having me near?" He frowned a bit.

"Ohh, so now it falls on me, huh? What about you?"

"I did not want to bother you, that's all. For all I know, you probably want me as far away from you as possible." Lucifer takes a deep breath, and exhales. "I am glad to see you again, and alive, if I have to tell you how I feel about this."

"How can you say that after stabbing me with my own blade?!"

"With your own blade." He pointed at his own words, and tried not to let this discussion affect him, but it looks impossible. "You tried to kill me, Gabriel, what was I supposed to do?"

"I wasn't planning to kill you!"

"No?" Lucifer releases a breath of a laugh, "Are you making fun of me?"

Gabriel frowns. Blinks. Clenched his fists.

"I did not want to fight you. Never." Lucifer's voice sounds even a little broken. "And you chose them over me..." His voice is so soft it almost resembles a whisper. "You even chose these abominations who call themselves gods, over me."

And how to answer he had feelings for Kali, and that he considered these gods, like family as well? "I couldn't let you take over Sam, I had to try to stop the Apocalypse you and Michael were trying to rise."

"What did you think I was going to do to Sam?" Lucifer lifted his brows, gesturing to join his words. "I did not even know he was there. And even if I did, he knew I was waiting for him. If I wanted to hold them in place, I would have done it, but I am not like Michael. I never forced him to say Yes to me."

And the Trickster remains silent for now, his breathing, his chest, going in and out as if he couldn't control the emotions being in a vessel. So many things he would like to say, Lucifer didn't tell him this when they fought, then why now?

Ok. Let's say he was mad, it's an option.

"You could have left after that, but you insisted to fight me..."

"And you killed me." He still can't forget the look Lucifer gave him right before ending his existence, he just can't. Gabriel did what he thought best, but he still loved his brother. Of course that situation hurt him, he had to go against the one who basically taught him all he knew.

"My mistake, if there is one, was allowing the anger to take over me, and finish you off that night." The eldest said after a moment of just looking at his brother, blinking, furrowing his brows almost sadly.

Anger was a big issue, indeed. Maybe still is... Maybe not.

Gabriel's eyes never left Lucifer's. He wanted to say something else, but now he couldn't somehow. The expectation to know if Lucifer would continue speaking, was too much.

"Maybe I could have saved you..." Even when the wound would probably end up killing Gabriel after that stab, and Lucifer as well thought for a moment to put him out of his misery, but... that's why Lucifer feels guilty anyway, he felt broken by so many different reasons, and that was one of them. Maybe, and just maybe, he could have saved him. End up trapping him or something, so Gabriel wouldn't put himself in the middle of his fight with Michael.

But things unfolded differently, and that's what bothers him.

Both remained silent after that, Gabriel not being sure of what to reply to Lucifer, and Lucifer not being sure of what to do next. His vessel is still falling apart, and he feels tired, he was tired for so many things at this point...

He wished Gabriel could just talk, say anything, a hint about him wanting to fix things, just say; It's in the past, bro.

Lucifer was about to say he was sorry, even when he as well was angry at Gabriel for what he tried to do, "I just..." He released a soft breath, "I'm just tired."

And damn his pride, he should just do the same he did with Michael years ago in that field, put the pride away, and beg him to stop. Beg him to be brothers again.

His lips parted open, as if wanting to say something, but then he closed them. Gabriel was always watching him, apparently feeling the same way, there is some doubt in the Trickster's eyes, that much Lucifer could tell, but he isn't sure. When the Devil parted his lips again to say something, someone entered the room.

It was Castiel. Finally.

And at the same time, Lucifer thought that he could have waited a minute more to step inside the room.

Sadly, now the moment was gone.

"Gabriel." Castiel said, opening his eyes some more when he saw his brother awake, just as Lucifer said. "You are awake... Are you feeling well?"

"I'm fine, bucko." And the Trickster was stepping away from the bed, as if he wanted to go outside.

Lucifer knows he is trying to run, again.

He didn't let that happen though, he was soon walking outside on his own first, and Castiel looked at him.

"Lucifer..." He tried to call him, and Lucifer glanced at him, then at Gabriel in a glimpse.

"I'm tired, Castiel. I might return later," the eldest said, looking at Cass. "... If anyone needs me." That is.

And just like that, knowing that Castiel had to stay anyway, because he was there to support the Winchesters and now Gabriel, he knew the best to do was just leave. And let's not even mention that Gabriel was surely going to be interrogated not only by the Winchesters, but probably Castiel as well.

The Angel of Thursday preferred him to stay, but he wasn't going to force Lucifer this time, so that's why he remained in silence and just watched him leave. The moment Lucifer stepped outside the cabin, Sam looked at him. Lucifer nodded once as a way to let him know he was leaving, and then disappeared.

Sam narrowed his eyes at that, and then spotted Gabriel by the door frame, next to Castiel.


It's cold.

So cold he believes he can't take it.

Maybe this was a new form to experience Nick's deterioration, he thought.

Lying on his side, giving his back to the room he has been using as a hideout for a while, and even the world, the Devil tries to rest with his eyes closed. His arms are around him, hugging himself. His wings are trying to cover him from what's around him as well, mostly his instinct kicking in, an old habit he had. It used to work eons ago, they were warm, he still can remember how his wings used to warm him and protect him... But not anymore.

His wings were just as cold as the aura around him, and sometimes, that as well makes him feel like crying. Father has taken so much from him, and the cage sure did a good job to destroy part of himself.

He isn't sure how much time had passed since he saw Gabriel and the others, but it has been a while.

Lucifer takes a deep breath, his borrowed vessel is shaking, and he is forced to open his icy blue eyes slightly. He can see the old couch, of course.

So many thoughts on his mind right now, but if there was one that occupied more of his time, that was the memory of Gabriel in that cabin.

The Morning Star can't help but feel sad, and alone.

And then he was thinking of Castiel.

He wonders if Castiel would guess when he needed him the most...?

Maybe not. Why would he?

No...

He was used to be alone by now. And strong connections, those didn't exist anymore.

The last time he felt really connected with someone, that was his brothers. Michael and Gabriel especially.

But that died the day he rebelled, and Michael kicked him out.

Another deep breath, and he was closing his eyes again.

Castiel is not coming.

Why was he thinking about the possibility he could?

Hope was the last thing one should lose...

Lucifer chuckles to himself.

He had fallen for the little one, isn't it? How could he crave for his company in moments like this? When he wished doubts could have an answer?

Get used to how things are now.
Remember this is all a lie.
Why would anyone want to love you again? Respect you again?
Put yourself back together, Morning Star.

He feels his eyes watering, and one of his hands covers his borrowed face.

I'm trying.

I'm trying.

"I knew you were not alright, brother..."

Lucifer must be about to fall asleep again or something, he knew it was going to happen because time to time, his vessel required it dealing its condition. And he also knew that sometimes he can get delusional, right before it happens. Sometimes he hears voices...

Or maybe it were just his own.

He decided to pay the voice some attention, and looking over his shoulder, still lying on the couch, he sees Castiel standing in there. He was just... In the middle of the room.

Now he was getting closer, and Lucifer had to squint his eyes.

"... Castiel?" Castiel was close enough to make the Devil look even up at him. Lucifer isn't sure what's going on, or why was the angel of Thursday, here. Maybe something happened. Maybe he needed his help? "Are you really here?"

"I am." Castiel almost tilted his head to one side at the sound of that question. Why was Lucifer asking that? "I was worried about you," he added later, and tried to sit down closer to Lucifer.

Lucifer obliged by lifting his upper body, allowing him. But when he was about to sit up better, Castiel was placing an arm around him, as gesturing Lucifer could use his legs to continue his rest.

"... You are... getting worse, aren't you?" The younger asked, watching Lucifer laying back and on his side, his face is hidden between Castiel's trench coat and his right side, Lucifer's face rests on his thigh. He has to narrow his eyes, concerned, and then, almost with doubts, he reached a hand to Lucifer's blond hair, and he brushed it carefully with his fingers. Caressing him.

But Lucifer doesn't reply.

He continued shivering every once and then.

Castiel can also sense his brother's wings still manifested, and it didn't matter how damaged they were, they were still a beautiful sight for him.

He doesn't touch them now though, he prefers touching Lucifer's hair.

"You are... cold..."

"I was cold the last time you saw me, little brother," Lucifer replied. At least he was talking again.

"But you feel colder now." He blinked and carefully slid his fingers along Lucifer's cheek.

The Morning Star slightly smiles at the touch, at the gentle caress. The comment made him chuckle softly. "It doesn't matter... at least you are warm." And he leans to the touch, he just can't help it.

Lucifer wanted Castiel closer, and closer. If that was possible, of course.

The next time the Devil trembles, and even whines softly with it, Castiel decided to lean closer, he wrapped his arms around him.

"You think here is... space for me, too?" Castiel whispered. The couch was big enough for both of them to lay down together, that was certain.

The question though, caught Lucifer off guard. "... Why do you ask?"

And Castiel decided it was better to show him with actions instead of words, so he just moved from his place, and laid carefully next to Lucifer on the couch. Lucifer had to lift one of his arms when the little one aimed to cuddle with him, and face him. Castiel had his back against the backrest of the couch, and Lucifer in front of him. He snuggles his face down Lucifer's chin, his arms embraces him, and he tries to pull him closer.

Lucifer feels numb at first, trying the sensation not to swallow him whole, as he feels Castiel so close to him it almost hurt. And when he can feel the younger sliding one of his legs in between his, Lucifer blinked. He gets it, he was trying to give him warmth, and the mere thought of it melts his heart.

"Why... are you doing this?" He had to ask.

"You are cold... Right?" Castiel replied, he had his eyes closed, as if trying to allow himself to enjoy this, getting comfortable in the spot.

"Yes, but..."

"Let me try to make you feel better."

The eldest's arm accommodates around Castiel, and sighs. He makes himself comfortable as well later, and closed his eyes.

Lucifer wasn't going to deny he appreciated this, it makes him feel good in so many levels.

Castiel doesn't say much after that, and Lucifer has questions, but he doesn't dare to break the silence.

"Did you... talk with Gabriel, brother?" The younger asked in a whisper, curious.

The Devil wasn't sure how to reply at first, or if he should reply at that at all. But Castiel deserved this, more after he had shown himself so caring around him. "Yes."

"I can feel you are... sad." Castiel adds. "You can talk to me, if you want." The younger feels Lucifer smile against his forehead, feels how his lips curled just slightly. And he blushed at that, probably. "I know that your... relationship with the other Archangels is serious, I'm not trying to sound... uhm... disrespectful or-"

"No, it's okay, little brother." Lucifer interrupted him in a soft whisper. "We ended up talking about the night we had to fight, he told me he didn't want to kill me," Lucifer chuckles sadly, curling his brows. "I told him my reasons for being there that time, and other things..."

Castiel looks up at Lucifer when the eldest decided to go silent suddenly, he looked thoughtful, and the angel of Thursday can only wonder what was going on in his mind.

"I think he," Lucifer started again later, furrowing his brows a little, "I doubt of being possible for us to... return to what we were."

"Why not?"

"He..." He isn't sure why, to be honest. "I'm not sure," but since Gabriel didn't try to stop him before, he believes he doesn't want him near. "It's just a feeling." Then again, he could have stayed, and make the younger Archangel listen to him completely.

Thing is he saw Gabriel trying to get away from the situation, so...

Yeah. A feeling.

Castiel didn't push the eldest for more explanation, he just sighed, and rested his head against his chest, his arms move carefully not to touch Lucifer's wings, and his palms try to touch other parts of his back, making sure his warmth reaches new places.

And Lucifer shivered at the caressing, making Castiel to doubt of his actions.

"I'm sorry, I-" He tried to apology. "Did I do something that made you feel... uncomfortable?"

But the Devil slightly shook his head, as the muscles flinched against Castiel's touch involuntarily. "... No." He replied softly, with his lips so close to the other's ear. "It's okay."

Castiel felt that like a purr.

Probably he imagined that, but it felt good one way or the other, feeling Lucifer talking like this to him, so close and... And then the eldest shifted on his spot, his hips moved forward and closer, making Castiel to feel the accidental friction in lower areas of his own vessel.

This also caused a little gasp out of the younger's lips.

The Devil doesn't seem surprised, but all the opposite. Probably an expected reaction.

Something he was waiting for to happen.