-Omake - Part 1-

AN: I /am/ working on the next actual chapter... But I got stuck trying to word some of it and I can't keep going until I do. The story is a bit angsty, too, so I thought doing this might be fun, if only to lighten the mood and have something to update with. Enjoy!


Hey, readers! Today we're going to interview our leading actors! Say hello to the stunning Arthur Kirkland and the sexy Alfred Jokes! Let's begin the series' first Q&A segment!


ILAVM123: What are your thoughts on the story so far?

Alfred: I like the story, but it's damn confusing! And for serious, what up with my character? I look like a sissy in the first chapter!

ILAVM123: Don't worry, you're growing balls. You're gonna need it soon... Arthur, what about you?

Arthur: I refuse.

ILAVM123: Do I need to edit out your human name and replace it with Albion? Hmm?

Arthur: Wanker... The faeries have—

Alfred: Imaginary friends, he means.

Arthur: (glare) The faeries have already told me the outcome. I have no comment at this time.

ILAVM123: Hmph. Someone's a grumpy uke.

Arthur: For the hundredth time—

Alfred: Sorry, dude. You bottom. You topped ONCE.

ILAVM123: Oookay! Question two. What is your reaction to the government shutdown?

Arthur: The bloody hell does that have to do with the story?

ILAVM123: Sorry. Failed joke attempt. I'll stick to watching Steven Colbert.

Alfred: You watch him, too? Dude! Wasn't that last Late Night Show awesome? Him singing! With Sasquatch dancing in the back?

ILAVM123: Yeah! And the beekeeper?

Arthur: Will you gits focus? I want to get this blasted interview over with and go home.

ILAVM123: Mm, sorry, no. You remain on-set at all times until I finish the story.

Arthur: THE BLOODY HELL?

ILAVM123: Don't worry, sex is portable (smile). Alfreddie will keep ya company.

Alfred: Dude? That's awesome. Let's go—

ILAVM123: NEH-EH. Gotta finish the interview. I'm not paying you to have sex yet. Okay. What are your responses to the characters? Jaynes, for example.

Alfred: I'm kinda hoping Heracles will come in. It kinda looks like Jaynes is hitting on Kiku, and last I checked, Heracles had a thing for him.

ILAVM123: Interesting thought. I may or may not incorporate that into the story... I was planning on, at a point, writing a Nekotalia omake chapter, so Heracles could easily make at least a cameo appearance. Arthur, what's your take on it?

Arthur: You've made it a bloody Damsel in Distress scenario for me! And all I've got for a knight is this bloody git! Fanbrat wanker!

ILAVM123: (Sigh) Well, this is productive (sarcastic). Next question. How often do you intend to have sex once you hook up?

Alfred: Isn't that a spoiler?

ILAVM123: No. It's a USUK fic; he's your love interest. The Ianto to your Jack Harkness. The Sunao to your Sora. The Kaito to your Akaito. The...

Arthur: Enough already!

ILAVM123: Dude! If it's that time of the month, I'm sorry, but we gotta get this done!

Alfred: The question... I dunno. Guess it depends. If the readers want sex, and the writer wants sex, I wouldn't mind. And Arthur isn't as rough as his scones, so I don't think he'd mind either. He's like a Valentines chocolate. Hard on the outside, and all fluffy and gooey inside.

Arthur: And you're like honey; sticky and hard to get out of my hair.

ILAVM123: (Snicker) I haven't seen a couple so loving since Kyou Kara Maou. Well, for the moment, I'm out of questions.

Arthur: May I go back to bed now?

ILAVM123: FINE, GEEZ! Alfred, until how late were you ravishing him last night? Tiny British men need sleep, too!

Alfred: Arty? …Whoa, awesome! Dude, where did you get a gun like that? It looks so cool!

Arthur: Doctor Who (deadpan).

ILAVM123: OH, SHIZNIT! NO EXTERMINATE! I SAY NAY! I SAY NA—

BZZZZZZZZZZT...

BROADCAST TERMINATED.


I'm sorry! Fail chappy, unrelated to the plot mostly! I AM working on the next PLOT-BASED chapter! I just wanted to do an interview thing and have something to update with. Still, reviews are what gets the gears going and my hands writing… er, texting? Since I do the writing portion on my phone. Still! Point is, the more reviews, the quicker the updates!

PS: If this is fail, in my defense, I wrote it at 2 in the morning.