Hi all! Here's chapter seven!


Chapter Seven: Adventures to the Land of the Living

December 13th

Rukia didn't know if she could ever get over the hilarity of the name 'Moocher', especially when it was applied to Renji. Upon hearing her friend being addressed as the name for the first time, she doubled over laughing.

"You!" said Renji, pointing accusingly at the red haired child, "How dare you call me that stupid name in front of Rukia!"

"It's okay," came Rukia's voice through fits of giggles. "I think it suits you…Moocher!"

Great, thought Renji. She'll never let me forget this…

"Hello Moocher!"

Renji sighed as yet another of the Urahara shop residents became aware of his arrival.

"There you are, Moocher!"

And another.

"Why, hello there, my favourite Moocher~!"

And the final and most annoying.

"Stop calling me that, already!" he shouted at the blonde haired man.

Urahara simply let loose his fan to cover his face and whispered across to his assistant, "Hey Tessai, the Moocher's getting mad."

Renji gave up. There was no point in trying to stop any of them, so he picked up his bags and headed towards his usual room, ignoring Rukia as she giggled behind him.


"Why do we have to stay here?!"

"Well we've stayed here before, so why not stay here again? There's enough room, there's food…what more could you want? Besides, our hostess reeeeeally likes you."

Ikkaku glanced down at the puff of brown hair near his chest, and the arms draped around his middle.

"You don't say..."

Mizuho looked up at Ikkaku. "You came to visit me for Christmas time! Does this mean you do believe in our life together?"

Ikkaku groaned and was saved by the idiot, as Keigo entered the room.

"It's you two!" he said, pointing dramatically at them.

"Hi~!" replied Yumichicka, smiling and waving.

Keigo suddenly became extremely excited. "Yay! Friends!! I'm thirsty…"

He then went to the fridge to get a drink of juice.

"We're going Christmas shopping over the next few days," Mizuho informed them, as her brother wildly romped around the fridge.

"What a coincidence," said Yumichicka. "So are we…"

"We can go shopping together, Darling," cried Mizuho, enthusiastically attaching herself to Ikkaku's arm.

"Just what I wanted…" said Ikkaku, sarcastically.

Mizuho was about to say something, but was interrupted by a knock to the door.

"I'll get it~!" called Keigo, as he ran down the hallway.

He returned a few moments later, "There are some weird people," he said. "I think they might be aliens…"

Ikkaku, Yumichicka and Mizuho quickly followed him out to the door, where indeed a group of very strange looking people were waiting.

Upon seeing them, the strange people began singing rather badly and out of time.

"…What are these guys?" wondered Ikkaku.

"Ahhhh! My ears!" complained Keigo.

"What an unpleasant sound," remarked Yumichicka.

"Get off my porch!" shouted Mizuho, quickly coming after the group with a broom. The action worked. Upon seeing the dangerous household weapon, the group immediately scattered and departed the Asano residence.

"That's right!" called Mizuho, tightly gripping her broom. "And don't come back!!"

Keigo, Ikkaku and Yumichicka immediately began to look busy in order to avoid the scary girl's wrath.


Shinji quickly ran down the street and met up with the others at their designated meeting place. Once they were all settled, Love spoke, "I don't think we should go for another round…that last woman was armed with a broom. What will be next? A gun?"

"Let's not get too hasty," said Shinji. "This was one time, okay?"

"But what about that guy with the dog?" pestered Hiyori. "Not to mention the kid with the water bombs…"

"And that old woman with the handbag," added Rose.

"And that dark haired girl and her two persistent friends," added Hachi.

"And the dyke," said Lisa with a shudder.

"And that young looking kid that kept hitting on the girls…" added Kensei.

"And the scary teacher woman with the ruler," said Mashiro.

"Okay, okay, okay," said Shinji. "So I get the idea you all don't want to do this anymore…But what can we do instead?"

"Nothing," said Hiyori.

"But we always do nothing," wined Shinji.

"How about we go to the North Pole," suggested Rose. "It would be an interesting experience and we could meet Santa!"

"You know…" said Kensei. "That's not actually a bad idea…"

"That's a great idea!" said Mashiro.

The other Vizards murmured in agreement.

"It's settled then," said Shinji, happy that the season wouldn't be going to waste. "We leave tomorrow morning."

They then retreated to their warehouse to pack the necessary items.

December 14th

Excitement filled the air of Las Noches, as the day of the shopping trip had arrived. A large garganta had been constructed, and even festively themed to go with the Christmassy surroundings. Beside the interesting transportation portal, The Great Aizen stood and addressed those that would venture onward.

"Good morning Espada, Gin, Tousen," he greeted.

"Why am I always last?" wined Tousen.

"Because I hate you," said Aizen before continuing. "As you all know, today is the day of your trip to the World of the Living. Now while you're there, I wont be around to supervise you, so make sure to be on your best behaviour. I can't have you ruining Hueco Mundo's reputation now, can I? Also, if you get lost or scared just tell Gin or Tousen."

"But what if I get scared?" wined Tousen once more. "Who do I tell?"

"Gin," replied Aizen.

"But he's the one who scares me…"

"I don't care. Suck it up."

There was a pause.

"Now," said Aizen. "I know some of you have a few difficulties when it comes to navigation. That is why I have partnered some of you up into groups of two. Aaroniero, I am aware that you are one of those with difficulties, and that is why I am entrusting you to Grimmjow. He has been to the Human world several times and will have you well looked after."

"Thankyou, Aizen-sama," said Aaroniero. "And thankyou Grimm-sama."

Grimmjow mumbled some incoherent thoughts and slowly edged away from the 9th Espada. Aaroniero only took that as an invitation to move closer. Poor Grimmjow.

"Now off you go, men!" declared Aizen.

"I'm not a man!" shouted Lilynette.

"You're not?" questioned Aizen. "Wow, you really do learn something new each day… Enjoy yourselves everyone! You will be supplied with gigai upon arrival. Don't stay out too late! And Zomari, remember: If someone offers you weed, you don't have to accept."

And with that, Gin, Tousen, Barragen, Aaroniero, Grimmjow, Ulquiorra, Zomari, Starrk (who was dragging Lilynette to stop her from attacking Aizen) and Nnoitra departed through the garganta, into the World of the Living.


"Are you coming, Captain?"

"Yes, now just let me finish on the toilet, for goodness sake Rangiku…"

"But you've been in there for almost half an hour, Toushiro…" came Orihime's worried voice from the other side of the door. "Surely last night's sardine and jam-tart casserole couldn't have made you sick…"

"Nonsense, Orihime!" said Rangiku. "That was delicious!"

"Why thankyou, Rangiku~!"

Those women…thought Hitsugaya. They must have stomachs of iron…

"I'll be out in a moment," he called.


Renji sat at the table in the Urahara shop, doing absolutely nothing. He had just finished breakfast and was waiting for Rukia to finish getting herself ready for their first round of shopping. His mind was so fixed on imagining Rukia in her new dress, he didn't notice anyone near him until he heard a voice.

"Enjoying your thoughts?"

Renji nearly jumped out of his skin when he noticed the shopkeeper was reclining across the table.

"Wha?!" when did you get there?"

"I've been here all along," said Urahara, smiling broadly.

Renji sighed and shook his head.

"Is the Moocher not amused?" wondered Urahara aloud.

"You're so obnoxious…" muttered Renji.

Urahara smiled. "But I'm good at it. Aren't I?"

"I guess…"

"Aww, the Moocher agrees~! Good little Moocher~!"

"Shut up! …And get off me!"

There were a few moments of silence, before Renji chose to speak. "So, Kisuke…"

"Mmm?"

"What do you do over Christmas?"

Urahara laughed and fanned himself flamboyantly. "I think the question is what don't I do over Christmas."

Renji facepalmed as the boisterous shopkeeper proceeded to tell—or rather show—him in great detail his various activities and occurrences over past Christmas breaks. This included him demonstrating how his Zanpakto, Benihime could turn into a giant candy-cane, and he began to rain-dance around the table for some reason.

"That's wonderful, Kisuke," said Renji, having paid no attention.

"But there's something different about this year…" said Urahara, suddenly sounding serious.

"And what's that?" asked Renji.

"It's Yoruichi," explained Urahara. "I know she'll come by for Christmas this year."

"You say that every year," said Tessai, who appeared to come out of nowhere.

"But this year she will come," said Urahara. "I can-"

"-Just tell," said Tessai, finishing Urahara's sentence. "Yeah, you say that every year as well."

Rukia entered the room to see Urahara moping in the corner. Deciding she didn't want to know what was wrong with the crazy shopkeeper, she quickly pulled Renji out the door by the arm and they departed to Karakura's main shopping square.


Tousen wandered aimlessly through Karakura town. Upon arriving in the Human world, they had gone their separate ways in search of gifts. In Tousen's case, he was completely clueless as to what to get for his selected Secret Santa candidate. What would a 2.5 metre tall spoon want anyway? Deciding he didn't want to spend the day in contemplation, Tousen blindly wandered into the closest shop and bought the first thing his hands met…


Ikkaku glared as he was lead into town arm in arm with Mizuho. Yumichicka and Keigo trailed along behind, suppressing the urge to laugh at Ikkaku's situation and whispering to each other every so often. Those bastards. At least Mizuho wouldn't be around for too long, as she was soon to go on a strictly all girls shopping trip with a couple of friends. Ikkaku thanked the heavens for women-only events. The moments he spent in town with Mizuho were uneventful, and then she was off.

"Yes! She's gone!" said Ikkaku, smiling.

"But you loved it," said Yumichicka.

"I did not!" snapped Ikkaku.

"You did so," said Yumichicka. "You never protest to any of her actions. It's funny."

"Shut up," said Ikkaku. "And so what if I don't protest?"

"You'd protest if it were anyone else," laughed Yumichicka.

"Are you implying something?" asked Ikkaku.

"Not at all, not at all…"


Gin wove silently throughout the isles of the toy store. He had been searching for a toy chemistry set for Szayel, but he had come across something far more interesting. Ex-girlfriend interesting. He peaked through a gap in one of the shelves as Rangiku and Orihime surveyed the soft-toy section. Their surveying was interrupted however, upon the arrival of a dark haired girl.

"Hi Rangiku, hi Orihime!" she called.

"Hello Karin," they replied.

Gin watched as they conversed with the newcomer.

"Toushiro is waiting a few shops down for you," informed Rangiku.

"Cool," said Karin. "I was just going to see him."

"Have you got any idea of what he's like for Christmas?" asked Rangiku.

"Hmmm…get him a soccer ball," said Karin. "He'd like that."

"Thankyou, Karin," said Rangiku. "I wouldn't have thought of getting him one otherwise…"

"No prob. I'll see you two later then," said Karin, as she turned to leave the shop.

"Bye~!"

Gin then grew bored and began playing with the theatrical masks. He tried on a gloomy looking one, and danced around in it for a bit, before the Karin girl came past, giving him an odd stare. Gin quickly stopped what he was doing, and put the mask back.


Short chapter again, I know. :P

Tomorrow's chapter will be longer ;) Review your thoughts!