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Disclaimer: Billy the Bard and Oda-chan owns everything, I only mashed them up

Chapter Five
That Could Be A Problem

As the late afternoon bled into early evening, over the regal city of Athens, a group of men were gathering under the great oak tree in the duke's forest. The first one to arrive was a thin, boney, man with bushy black hair. Soon after, a young pink haired lad found his way there with one his best friends, and the youngest of the group. Brook, Colby, and Chopper didn't have to wait long for the missing members of rough looking workmen to arrive at the meeting place. Franky, Hatchi, and Ussop came up together after entering the forest.

The great oak tree, which was the biggest tree in the entire forest, had once been walled off as part of the royal family's precious gardens. However, that had been so long ago it had mostly been forgotten, and the only reminders were some crumbled stone walls. Wild honeysuckle and lavender perfumed the air and the vines twisting around the nearby trees tangled in their reaching branches. Birds sang their evening song as the sun, worn from its race across the sky, prepared to rest and let the silvery moon take its place.

Once gathered under the leafy limbs of the sheltering tree Ussop stood up to address his fellow players. Brook, even though he was the official leader, allowed the younger man to carry on. It was far less stressful that way.

"So, are we all here?" The long nosed poet asked. He stood up on a large rock so that he could take count of who was missing. Ussop grinned widely when all the men were accounted for. 'Now we can really get this show on the road.'

"Alright then," Brook said clearly, breaking into the small conversations around him. "Since all players are now here we can begin. The clearing here will provide the stage." He told the group, giving a gesture around the area, and then pointed to a spot nearby where bushes clumped together on the right edge of the tree line. "These bushes over here can be the entrance to the stage."

Franky, Hatchi, Colby, Ussop, and Chopper all nodded enthusiastically. It seemed everyone was eager to start rehearsals. They all knew they'd need all the practice they could get in the short amount of time before the wedding ceremony.

While everyone else was busy getting into position, there was one man who didn't. Ussop still hadn't moved from his spot in front of the so called "stage entrance". It looked like the curly haired poet was thinking deeply about something. Finally when Brook was passing him on the way to help Chopper, he called the boney man's attention. "Hey, Brook?"

Brook paused and turned to face his long time friend. By the tone of voice he could tell that Ussop was actually going to bring up something serious this time. He glanced over to the young brown haired apprentice and saw that Hatchi was helping him instead. "Yes, my friend? What is it?" Brook asked, taking some time now that Chopper was already being helped.

"I've been thinking it over ever since I read the script earlier." Ussop started speaking. His tone was soft and thoughtful as he stroked his chin, where a few chin hairs had grown, still in thought on the matter. "There are things in the play that'll never work. This is a comedy, right? But there is way too much killing in it to be very funny. Pyramus has to take a sword and kill himself. The ladies in the audience won't be able to stand seeing that. We have to do something about it."

"Yeah, that's true. That could be a real problem." Colby agreed as he came up to join the conversation. He had been nearby and had overheard Ussop's worry. The pink haired boy's voice caught the attention of the others and they also started gathering around.

Hatchi, after helping Chopper, came over with the apprentice at his side. He stopped right behind Ussop. "Nyu, if it comes to that, we should leave out all the killing parts." He said suddenly, catching the poet off guard.

Ussop shrieked and whirled on his two friends that had all of a sudden snuck up on him. "What are you doing?! You nearly gave me a heart attack!" He yelled at them, clutching his chest where his heart was slowing down after the scare.

Continuing the conversation, even with Ussop in the background yelling at Chopper and Hatchi. The carpenter- Franky- snapped his fingers as an idea hit him. "I don't think we have to go that far, Hatchi-bro. I got a plan." He said, causing the others around him to look up in surprise. "We can write a prologue, like they do in some of the other plays, it can be used to explain things."

Totally forgetting about yelling at the other two for the moment, Ussop jumped on the idea, and he laughed excitedly. That's great, Franky. I can recite a prologue before the play even starts to explain things. I'll tell them that we won't hurt anyone and that the swords are really fake. And as far as Pyramus killing himself, I'll revel that I'm Pyramus and that I won't truly take my life. That'll keep the ladies from being afraid."

"That was truly a fine idea, Franky. I think you might've saved us with that." Brook praised. He clapped a thin hand on the carpenter's broad back.

Franky blushed, noticeable even in the evening light, but he tried to hide it by covering his face with his hands. "Aw, don't be sayin' that, you guys. And I'm not blushin' either."

"We still have another problem. If we don't want to scare the ladies of the court don't we have to be worried about the lion too?" Chopper asked innocently. All eyes turned to the youngest member for a few moments and then everyone made a surprised noise. No one had even thought about that.

"Yeah, I was thinking about that too." Ussop admitted thoughtfully.

"Do we have to do another prologue for this one too?" Chopper asked the poet. He looked around at the others but there wasn't an answer for him.

"Nah," Ussop finally said, "we can just announce all the actor's names at the start. Franky could show his face through the costume and can stand and say something so the ladies know he isn't a real lion. He should say something to the same defect as…"

"Wait, don't you mean 'effect', Ussop?" Colby asked, stepping up beside his friend.

"Uh, yeah…" The poet nodded and scratched his head nervously but he continued despite the interruption. "Anyway, he should say this. Ladies, I would like to ask you not to be afraid. I value your lives as highly as my own. If you thought I was a real lion, I would be risking my life. But, no, I am only a man. I am just like any other man." Ussop finished Franky's introduction and smiled to the others, waiting to see what they would say. It was silent for a few moments as the other men thought about the idea.

Brook nodded after thinking it over. It was his final decision to make, after all. "Yes, that sounds like a simple solution. That's what we'll do then." The thin man looked down at his brass topped cane, his expression remaining serious, and the others knew he wasn't done speaking. "However, there are still two problems we have yet to find answers for. These are about the props that are used in the play. One- how can we bring moonlight into the hall? And two- how can we construct and place a wall? Because you know Thisbe and Pyramus talk through a stone wall and they meet by moonlight."

"Wait a minute." Colby suddenly popped up again. "Will the moon even be shining on that night?"

"We need an almanac!" Ussop exclaimed. He himself didn't have one on him so he looked to his fellow players. "We'll need to look up the moon's cycle for that night."

The bushy haired Brook, luckily for everyone, happened to have a recent copy of the month's almanac with him. The older man pulled the volume from the inside of his coat and turned to the desired page that held the information they were seeking. "Ah, it seems we're in luck, my friends. The moon will be out and shining brightly on that night."

"That's great." Ussop exclaimed. "We can just open the windows in the performance hall when the time comes. The moonshine can come in through there. So long as it isn't cloudy."

"Yes of course." Brook agreed happily. 'I must say, this was working out better than expected. Everything is lining up just right for this great performance.' He thought to himself. "Even if clouds do cover the moon and block out the silver rays it so generously gives us then we can have a back up. One of us can come in carrying a bundle of sticks and a lantern, he can represent the character of Moonshine, because the man in the moon is supposed to carry sticks and a lantern. Now if our problem of building a wall on the stage could be solved as easily as that it would be wonderful."

Ussop and the other workmen from the city stopped and stood together in thought on this current problem. This one was a bit more difficult. It would be nearly impossible to carry in a stone wall large enough for Pyramus and Thisbe to whisper through. Or even to build one there on stage. The evening sun sunk a little lower as the group of friends stayed in silent thought.

All of a sudden, Ussop lit up, and smacked the palm of his hand with his fist in one of his 'ah-ha' moments. "I got the perfect idea!" He exclaimed excitedly.

Brook and the others all looked to the young poet in curiosity. With Ussop this idea was either going to be really good or really silly.

"All we have to do is get someone to play the part of the Wall." Everyone groaned or face palmed when they heard that. "Hey, wait a minute, let me explain. One of us can come up on stage with some plaster or clay stuck to them. This would be to show the audience that he's a wall. The Wall can hold his fingers in a O-shape to signify the hole through which Pyramus and Thisbe are talking." Ussop held up his pointer finger and thumb and made a circle with them to demonstrate what he was talking about.

"Brilliant, Ussop!" Chopper yelled.

"That's pure genius!" Colby readily agreed in his excitement.

Both young players had stars in their eyes from the clear admiration of the long nosed poet.

Brook, who was much more reserved, nodded his appreciation. "Excellent idea, indeed. Where would this play be without you?" He praised his young friend. "If all this comes together, then everything will be set. Now, everyone, let's begin the rehearsals before it gets too late. We'll start with Pyramus. When you're not supposed to be on stage then sit behind those bushes over there, remember that's to be the entrance to the stage." Brook reminded the gathered men as he got them back to business. They didn't have much time for learning their lines after all.

Meanwhile, unknown to the group of enthusiastic workmen, a playful spirit was making his way directly for them. The wild, black haired, fairy was on his way back to his king with the special flower he had been sent to retrieve.

Hearing the banter between the men through the trees, Ace paused, teetering precariously on a thin branch high above the forest floor. Looking down he didn't see anything but branches and leaves, deciding that the trip back with the love-in-idleness flower could wait, he grinned and jumped down from his spot to see what the commotion was.

Landing just out of sight, behind the border of the clearing, in the leafy undergrowth, Ace peeked around the wide trunk of an old beech tree. He watched with amusement as the group of men moved around the clearing seeming to set themselves up for something. "Well, what do we have here? A bunch of vagabonds fooling around one of the queen's favorite sleeping spots?" The trickster fairy continued to watch the humans do… whatever it was they were doing… with a very curious eye.

'Ah, I get it! They're putting on a play.' Ace thought with a grin when he figured out what was going on. 'I haven't seen one of these human performances in a while. I think I'll stay and watch for a bit, maybe I'll even put in a guest appearance.' He chuckled quietly to himself and he waited for just that opportunity. Zoro wouldn't mind waiting for a little while longer.

Unknown of their audience Brook began directing the others into their positions and what they were supposed to do. "Alright, we'll start with Pyramus speaking with Thisbe. So, Ussop you come on first." The boney old man took a few steps back to watch the young poet say his lines.

Ussop stepped out of the bushes and cleared his throat grandly, ready to deliver his first- surely dramatic- lines. "Thisbe, sweet flowers with such odious smells…"

Brook slapped his forehead. "You mean 'odors', Ussop." Chopper peeked out from behind the group of bushes to whisper the correction with a lop-sided frown.

"…Odors and smells…" Ussop altered the line but didn't stop in his delivery. "…are like your breath, my dearest Thisbe. But, what's that, a voice? Wait here, I'll check it out and come right back." The long nosed man put a hand to his ear, as if hearing someone approaching, and then once his lines were said he rushed off stage to check the mysterious noise.

Ace's mouth twitched in barely restrained laughter. 'That's the weirdest Pyramus I've ever seen. It'd be a sad thing to see if these guys actually plan to carry out this so called play.' The freckled fairy had to clutch the trunk of the tree for support as he doubled over in an attempt to fight off the loud bout of laughter trying to escape his throat.

Once under control again, Ace straightened up, and only shook his head. Turning away from the group of Athenian workmen the trickster bounded up into the treetops again and finally allowed himself to break into chuckles. Zoro would be looking for him by now and the king was pretty impatient these days. "If there's time later, I'll go back and have some fun with those pathetic wanna-be actors." He laughed heartily as he flew through the topmost branches of the forest.

XxXx

Through the trees and bushes surrounding the clearing where the green haired king waited, himself invisible, not even casting a shadow on the ground. Zoro continued to watch and wait and suddenly two young people appeared in his sight. Unknown to him it was Sanji and trailing behind him was Vivi. Both Athenian citizens looked more than a little ruffled from trekking through the woods at this time of night but the worse off was the poor blue haired girl who followed after the blonde so devotedly.

Sanji paused in the center of the clearing and pulled a handkerchief from his pocket to wipe the sweat on his brow. Behind him he heard Vivi struggle with the thorn bushes that had undoubtedly caught on her skirts… again. Why she insisted on following him even after telling him about the plan Luffy and Nami had to run away was beyond his understanding. He really hoped this wasn't all a wild goose chase because it was becoming too much trouble and he wouldn't be able to forgive her so easily. His boots were mud caked. His clothes were torn and filthy. And he was sure he didn't want to leave the city walls ever again unless there was a carriage involved.

"Look, I don't love you, so stop following me around." The blonde young man turned his uncaring blue eyes on the woman who trailed after him all the way from the city gates. "You said that Luffy and Nami would be out here, in this forest. Well where are they? There's no sign of them. I'll stop that Luffy from stealing away my precious love even though it's Nami who has stolen my heart. I'm going crazy in the middle of these dark woods because I can't find my Nami."

Sanji ran a frustrated hand through his hair as he turned in his spot, hoping to see some trace of the two people he was out here looking for. Instead all he was greeted with was Vivi as she seemed to finally free herself of the forest brush and walked up to his side.

"What are you still doing here," he questioned with an annoyed tone when Vivi reached him again, "why do you still follow me? Get out of here, Vivi. Stop trailing after me like some desperate starved puppy." He stomped away from the blue haired girl. All the blonde wanted was to get as far away from his insistent traveling companion as he could get.

"I can't help that I'm attracted to you." Vivi pouted. She ran her fingers through her long blue hair, pulled over her shoulder, brushing it free of tangles and twigs that had gotten stuck. "It's like metal is drawn to a magnet because my heart is as true as steel. If you let go of your power to attract me, I won't have any power to follow you."

"What?" Sanji growled out in confusion. She really wasn't making any sense. He whirled on the girl, his eyes hard and cold. "Do I ask you to follow me around? Do I encourage your love? Don't I tell you in the clearest terms that I don't love you? If I have made that mistake then please tell me so that I can rectify it." The young man questioned darkly as he advanced on her.

"All that only makes me love you more. The more you tear me down, the more I love you." Vivi didn't back away from Sanji's fierce glare or at his advancing steps. She clasped her hands together in front of her chest as her watery eyes merely watched the object of her devotion come nearer to her. "Treat me as badly as you wish but, please, let me to stay with you even though I could never be good enough. I would consider it an honor if you would only allow me that, Sanji."

Sanji scoffed and clenched his fists in frustration. There's no way he could hurt a lady physically, no matter how annoying and clingy she was. His upbringing was better than that. 'However, maybe I can convince her to give up on her own. If I can't do so by force.' Sanji looked back at the blue haired young woman who had been a thorn in his side ever since he left her. "You're pathetic, Vivi. You make me sick." He hoped this would do the trick and she would go running back to the city and far away from him. Then all that would be left is dealing with Luffy and bringing Nami back to her father so the two of them could be married.

Vivi flinched at Sanji's harsh words but when she looked up at him again there wasn't a trace of hate or dislike for the blonde young man in her expression. "I know how you feel. When I can't look at you, it makes me feel sick." She stepped closer to Sanji, ignoring the deep frown that came over his face as she did so.

Sanji clenched his teeth down hard and tried again to dissuade the young woman from following him any further into the forest. "Your reputation will be at risk, you know." He motioned to the dark forest around them. "If you follow after someone who doesn't love you, into the deserted woods outside the city gates, and also in the middle of the night. It isn't really a good idea."

"I rely on your virtue to protect me, should I need it." Vivi said as she grabbed hold of the young man's elbow and pulled herself closer to his side. Leaning into him the devoted woman's kind gray eyes showed absolute trust in her companion. "It doesn't even feel like nighttime to me when I can see your shining eyes. You are my world, so this forest doesn't seem to be deserted, how can it be with the whole world here looking after me?"

Jerking his arm away from the girl Sanji scowled at his hopeless situation. He was beginning to think there really was no way to get rid of her. 'The last thing I want is for her to get the wrong idea and start thinking I care. Then I'll never get her away from me.'

"Then I'll just run away and hide in the bushes and I'll leave you to the mercy of the wild animals." The blonde man sneered as he looked down at the pathetic young lady in front of him. He actually wondered for a moment if he could bring himself to do it. Sanji highly doubted he would be able to turn his back on any woman, even Vivi, out here in the middle of the forest.

"The wildest animal isn't as cruel as you are." Vivi moaned. She crossed her arms over her chest, comforting herself, and frowned sadly in Sanji's direction. "Run where you want. The story of Daphne and Apollo will be reversed. The lustful sun god, Apollo, runs away from the silvery moon, Daphne. And, the gentle deer hunts the fierce tiger. Speed is useless when the cowardly person chases the brave person that runs away."

Rubbing a hand over his face in frustration Sanji wasn't even paying attention to Vivi. He was too busy trying to figure out a direction to go, it was difficult because he was no hunter, and he had no idea where Luffy had dragged Nami in this deep forest.

"I'm not sticking around here to listen to you ramble on. I've got to find my Nami. Leave me alone or you better watch out, Vivi. I might just do something if you follow me any further into these woods." With that the young blonde haired man whirled in a random direction and marched off. He soon disappeared in the thick foliage of the forest.

Soon enough Vivi was left behind. She couldn't believe the man she loved would leave her here. "I'll still follow you and turn this Hell I'm in into a Heaven." The blue haired girl vowed to herself and stomped her foot in the dirt. 'Saying it is easy but I don't know how to change Sanji's mind. Maybe something will come to me if I continue to follow him. It has to if I'm really going to take him back from Nami's spell.'

Vivi looked around nervously in the dark, unsure of her surroundings, before she ran after Sanji. The last thing she wanted was to wander about the forest at night and possibly be eaten by some wild beast. That and she didn't even know the way back to the city after following him for so long.

Watching after the pair as both the young man and woman hurried out of his sight the Fairy King came out of hiding. The green haired royalty cocked his head to the side and he couldn't help but feel sorry for the young woman. "Such a sweet young girl." Zoro said after the blue haired Athenian woman. She was a real beauty and even though he didn't really involve himself in the affairs of strange mortals, he couldn't allow such a tragedy to befall the lovely woman as her love remaining unrequited. "Before that curly-browed man leaves this forest, you'll change places, and then you'll be the one running away and he'll be in love with you."

The warm night was only started and already Zoro could tell it was going to be busy in some way. The wind blew through the tops of the trees making the summer leaves rustle in a music all their own and the fairy monarch enjoyed it for a moment before stepping to the side just in time.

That very instant a blur of movement landed on the ground finally revealing itself to be the prankster, Portgas D. Ace. His longish black hair was even more wild than before from his run to get the flower and back.

"Heya." Was the simple greeting to his king as he straightened up again.

"Ace, do you have the flower?" Zoro asked, not bothering with a return greeting for his messenger.

"Yep, I got it right here." Ace answered, brandishing the purple petaled flower in his hand.

Zoro smirked and held out his hand to take the oh-so-important piece of his plan from the prankster. "Good, hand it over. You actually did a good job and didn't screw it up this time." The Fairy King praised his friend and servant.

The fairy with wild black hair and roguish smile crossed his arms in a huff, threatening to crush the flower in his fists as he did so. "Hey, I take offence to that. Just because that shepherdess suddenly didn't want to see you anymore, you can't blame that on me." Ace shook his head at Zoro. He was referring to the time, some weeks ago, when the king had been out on one of his trips to visit the village girls.

"Oh yes, of course, how could I forget. It was the fault of the rich noble that you pretended to be, in order to draw the woman away." Zoro slapped the side of his head, as if he had suddenly forgotten that fact, but then glared accusingly at his now nervous friend. "We surely can't forget when you tried to trick me into believing some rogue, wandering, spirit turned one farmer's daughter into a cow and went to sell her at the market as you made off with her into the fields."

Ace made a choking sound when the green haired king brought that incident up. He was sure Zoro was over that already, it had happened a full month ago, after all. "Ah, yeah, well…"

Zoro reached out and snatched the flower out of his servant's hand and Ace let him for fear of having him even more annoyed. "Anyway, now to the business at hand. If this works I just might forgive you for those transgressions." The Fairy King smiled darkly in Ace's direction. "I know where the queen will probably sleep tonight. I'll head over there now and put the juice of this flower on her eyes and then they'll be filled with such wild delusional desires." Zoro started to laugh quietly to himself. Then, he paused, and looked down at the purple flower in his hand. The king tore the flower in half and handed over part of it to Ace.

The trickster looked in confusion at the flower petals given to him and then up at his king for an explanation. "While I do this, you'll take some of this flower and search this part of the forest. An innocent Athenian lady is in love with a young man who wants nothing to do with her. Put some of this flower's juice on his eyes but make sure to do it so that the next thing he sees will be the poor, desperate, woman. The man's wearing Athenian clothes, so you can easily tell him apart. How many of the citizens wander about here at night anyway? You'll have to be careful with this, he'll need to end up loving her more than she loves him already. Afterwards, come back to meet me before the rooster's first crow of dawn."

"Will do, boss." Ace brought his fingers to his brow in a sharp salute to the mossy haired Fairy King and in the blink of an eye he was gone from the clearing.

Likewise, Zoro also left the clearing, though a bit more dignified and calm than his freckle faced messenger. "Robin, just you wait." He muttered under his breath. "I'm gonna have a good laugh at this tonight, I warned you after all."

=0=0=

Ooo, so Zoro's plan is unveiled. What kind of beast will the Fairy Queen fall madly in love with? And will Ussop's group of merry players ever get their act together? Next chapter is up soon.