Author's Note: Remember I'll take any type of criticism! If I'm doing something wrong or if there's something I can improve please tell me! Thanks! And sorry it took so long. Guess that ADD kind of kicked in…
Song: "Ghost of You" by Good Charlotte
And
I will wait until the end I have been searching for traces of what we
were
When the pendulum will swing back to the
darker side of our hearts bleeding
I will save this empty space
next to me like it's a grave
Where I lay a place for us to sleep
eternally together
Lucas abruptly woke up in a cold sweat. His mother was alive. She told him that she never wanted him. She told him that he should have never been born. It was a mistake. He was a mistake. No. No, it wasn't true. She wasn't alive. She was dead. She would have never said anything like that. She loved him. Didn't she?
A
ghost of you is all that I have left
It's all that I have left of
you to hold
I wake in the night to find there's no one there but
me
And nothing left of what we were at all
Did she really think those things? Did she really wish that she had aborted him when she had had the chance? He decided against it and tried to get some sleep. He had no idea what tomorrow was going to be like. He had no idea what the rest of his life was going to be like. Were they going to at least keep him? He knew that Dan didn't like him, but Deb had acted nice to him. What about Nathan. Were they the kind of parents who only cared about their real son? Nathan had always seemed spoiled. Maybe they would get rid of him if he didn't get along with Nathan. He was just so tired…
So
here I am pacing around this house again I have
been searching for traces of what we were
With pictures of us
living on these walls
I see my breath in the cold of the air that
I breathe and I'm wondering
I'm wondering if it's you that I feel
If it's you that I feel here haunting me forever
He was walking outside. He had no idea where he was. There was nothing but the sidewalk empty of everyone but him and the street empty of all the cars. There weren't any houses or trees. Then he saw it. His house. The house that he thought he would never be allowed to go in again. He started running towards it, trying to get to it as fast as he could. He reached the house and opened the door to find everything the same. He walked around looking at all the old pictures of him and his mother. A picture of him at his fifth birthday party hung on the wall of the hall. A picture of him and Keith when he was a baby sat on an end table next to the living room couch. Skills and him playing basketball at River Court. Baby pictures of him. Pictures of him growing up. Pictures of Karen and Keith. Pictures of him and Karen. He walked up to one and saw the last picture that they ever took with Keith. He was twelve. Luke was sitting in between Keith and Karen on the couch. He remembered that day. How Keith had finally proposed to Karen, how she said yes, how they were all so excited. That was the day of the fire. Keith's apartment building had caught on fire. They never got him out in time. Suddenly it got cold in his house. He could see his breath. He heard his mother calling him. But she was dead. She couldn't be here. Maybe she wasn't dead. Maybe she was still alive! He followed the calls to his mother's room. He opened the door and found her. Dead. Dead on the bloodied carpet. He screamed. He screamed as loud as he could, but no sound came out. So he started running. He ran as far as he could from the house. Away from his dead mother. Away from his house. Away from everything.
And
I'm not looking for anything but us
Anything but what we were
And
I'm not asking for painted memories
I only want to know you're
here
Someone else was calling his name now. His mother. No it was someone else's voice. "Lucas, wake up! Lucas you're having a dream!" A dream? Unexpectedly, he was in his bed. The sidewalk was gone. The emptiness was gone. Everything but the cold. He was so cold he was shaking.
"Lucas, you're burning up! Do you feel alright?" Deb.
All he could do was nod. He didn't think he could make any words out without his voice cracking.
"You were having a bad dream. Do you want to talk about it?"
Talk about? Was she insane? He had only met her today, but she wanted him to tell her everything that was wrong. She wanted him to open up to a complete stranger when he wasn't all that good at opening up at all. He just turned over and faced the other way.
A
ghost of you is all that I have left
It's all that I have left of
you to hold
I wake in the night to find there's no one there but
me
And nothing left of what we were at all
He heard two pairs of footsteps leaving the room but didn't give it much concern. He was too wrapped up in his own thoughts. He had another dream that night. She was watching him play basketball, cheering him on. When he woke up though, he was alone. She was really dead.
