AN: Hello! Thank you for reading my fic! I hope you're enjoying it!
I have two questions about where I should take the direction of this fic, so if you could let me know what you think, I'd really appreciate it.
1. I've already rated this fic M, both because I think that there will be both sexual content and a small bit of swearing in it. In terms of sexual content, how far do you think I should go? Time lapses, full-on smut, something in between? Let me know.
2. I don't want the bulk of the story to happen until James and Lily are a bit older, so what would you prefer to see- a brief recap of a year or so at the start of a chapter, a few little moments that are spaced a few months apart? Once again, please let me know!
"How does a girl actually get pregnant?"
James turned his head at the question. Sirius was juggling apples, watching the fruits but with a curious expression on his face.
James thought for a moment. "I don't actually know," he admitted. "Muggles do it, so clearly it isn't a spell."
"It's sex," said Remus, not even bothering to look up from his book.
"Sex…" said James, hoping that if he said the word too, it would sound like he'd heard of it before.
"Oh right, yeah," said Sirius, still juggling. James looked over at him.
"You don't know what sex is, you prat!"
"Well you don't either!" said Sirius, chucking an apple at James. He threw a second one at Remus to get his attention, before taking a bite out of the third.
"Go on then, Remus. Tell us what sex is, if you're so clever. James needs to know what to look out for in our beloved Queen." Sirius winked at James as he said this. Once again, James regretted telling his friends about his feelings for Lily.
Remus put down his book. "Well let's forget the Queen for a minute, if we can all manage that," he said, taking his own chance to wink at James. "It's easier to explain if it's all impersonal."
Remus then began to explain the process of sex. Fifteen minutes later, he sat back and smiled smugly at the expression on his friends' faces.
"How do you know all this?" asked James. As far as he knew, Remus had never done anything like that.
"Learned it in a book. Haven't you ever been curious where we came from?"
"Well of course I have Remus, that's why I asked you," said Sirius, who had begun doodling a picture of a woman, now including the new body parts he knew about. "This also explains certain things I wanted to do when I was snogging that girl behind the sweet shop last week."
James thought about things he had wanted to do while snogging. He felt his face go red.
"So, Lily's going to… do that. And I'm going to have to know about it."
Sirius' eyes sparkled. "Not unless you do it first yourself, mate."
James didn't have to think of a reply because at that moment, his ring began to glow. "It's Lily," he said, "I guess she found my note."
"I guess she wants to have sex with you!" laughed Sirius, who held up his doodles to show the body parts necessary for the act.
"Good luck, Remus; he's going to have a lot of fun with this," said James as he walked out of the room.
"Oh God, I know," sighed Remus, who, thanks to Sirius, now had two or three paper aeroplanes magically flying around his head.
Lily took a deep breath to calm herself as she heard James knock on her balcony door. She wasn't sure how she felt about James right now. She'd been so hurt when he hadn't been at her coronation, but when she woke up and found his note, she was touched. And of course, the flowers were beautiful. It was true, she was normally surrounded by lilies as they were, of course, her namesake, but James had been wrong; no-one had actually given them to her before. She had moved the vase beside her bed, and looked at them one more time before going to open the door.
As soon as she saw James, she knew how she felt; and it wasn't angry or upset. With his hand nervously ruffling his hair and him looking down at her because he was so gangly and tall, she couldn't help but smile, and was glad when he smiled back at her.
"Your Highness," he said with a bow, before standing up straight suddenly. "No! I mean, Your Majesty! That's right, isn't it? Your Majesty?" James wished he'd looked up the correct term before coming over.
Lily laughed. "Lily," she corrected him. "Though yes, "Your Majesty" is my official title now."
Lily moved back to let James in. "Thank you for the lilies," she said. "I love them."
James ruffled his hair again. "Oh it's fine, I'm sorry I didn't have anything more special for you. And I'm sorry I wasn't at the coronation." He was looking her in the eye now. "I should have been there for you. I didn't come because I was embarrassed, y'know, about what happened last time." James turned away and sat in an armchair; he'd just made things even more embarrassing by bringing it up again.
Lily followed him over to the chair and stood in front of him. "I don't want you to be embarrassed. I didn't tell you before because I didn't know if I could… I still don't know if I can, but I don't care. James, I care about you too."
James looked up at her, his hopes raised. Did she really mean it? She looked like she did.
She took another step closer to him so that their knees were touching, and took his hands in hers. "I'm sorry that you were embarrassed. I really hated the way things ended before." James could see that she was getting upset. "I just, I didn't-"
James pulled Lily down to sit on his knee, then put his arms around her. "It's okay," he said softly, stroking her hair. Lily leaned into him and he sat back in the armchair, the two of them cuddled up. After a moment, Lily had calmed down and brought her face in front of James'. They both had so many things they wanted to say, but as they looked at each other, it felt like it could all wait.
They kissed, and it felt like they could pour everything they felt into that kiss. James held Lily as tight as she could, feeling like she might disappear is he didn't kiss her hard enough. Lily moved her weight off James, and he thought she was about to stop kissing him, when instead she had moved her legs so that she could straddle him. As she put her weight back on top of him, everything felt a hundred times better. In fact, certain parts of him were starting to feel too good…
"Wait," he said, pulling away from Lily, even though it was the last thing he wanted to do. "I just found out about sex, and we've got to make sure that we don't do that-"
But James didn't get any further, because Lily had burst out laughing.
"You just found out about sex? You're nearly seventeen!" She sat back slightly. "Didn't Dumbledore ever tell you where babies come from?"
James reddened, not realising this was something he was already supposed to know.
"No, why would he tell me about that?"
"Because it's such a basic thing! It's happened to all of us, and we can't have children without knowing about it!" Lily blushed at her own choice of words. "Well, not you and me, a hypothetical 'we', but… I can't believe you didn't know."
James tried to imagine Dumbledore giving him the speech that Remus had earlier. "I don't know, I have a feeling it's not something he'd want to teach."
Lily shook her head and got off James, crossed the room, and took a book from her bookshelf. "You should probably read this," she said, handing the book to James. "It's all about how the body changes, and things like sex and pregnancy." She paused. "I guess you'll have to learn to look out for the signs one day."
"Yeah." Now that James knew how Lily would become pregnant, he really didn't like the sound of it happening. He already hated the idea of meeting some prince who he would know had done all of those things.
"It won't happen for years, though," Lily added quickly. "I was talking to Minerva, and I'll have to be at least eighteen before I even start thinking about that kind of thing."
"Right." James stood up. Suddenly he didn't feel comfortable anymore. He made his way towards the door, but Lily ran in front of him to stop him leaving.
"James, wait." Lily looked up at him with her big green eyes, and James instantly softened. "This whole 'first born' thing is so far away from now, I don't even want to think about it yet. Can't we just see each other without having to think about all that? I don't want to lose you again."
James sighed, then pulled her into a hug. "Sure," he muttered into her hair. He didn't know how to feel about this, but like she said, nothing was going to happen for a few years. They might as well enjoy each other's company.
