Author's note:
First of all I wanna thank you for all the alerts and reviews! Thanks so much! It means a lot to me, cause I never thought so many of you would read my story :D So thank you!
Here's the sixth chapter now. Gosh, it's really long this time... Poor Tori, she really needs some sleep. And Beck? Well, just read to find out what happens next. Hope you like it!
I do not own Victorious... Yeah, I'd love to, but all rights belong to awesome Dan Schneider!
CHAPTER SIX
JUST TONIGHT
ANDRÉ'S POV
My jaw dropped when I realized what Cat had just said. What? Oh shit, no. Tori was in love with him? Why didn't I know? God, wait, no... I probably should have known... I mean, it was pretty obvious, right? Now that Cat had told me... The way Tori was acting during the last four weeks was different. I indeed had realized that, but I thought it was just one of these phases girls sometimes have. Well... but that explained her weird behavior. But why hadn't Beck realized it? He was her best friend! He should be the first person to notice when something was wrong with her. Oh, but then again... Now, having to think about this... whenever he was around she was exactly the same girl we all know and love. But when he looked away... Oh my god. Poor Tori.
"How long do you know?" I asked Cat.
"Today." She replied smiling.
"Are you sure she said she's in love with him?"
"What's that supposed to mean?" She shrieked. I took a deep breath and gave her an excusing smile.
"Dunno, I just thought that... maybe you could have... gotten her wrong?"
"No!" was all she replied. I could tell from her voice that she was offended again. A sigh slipped from my lips as I looked at her. That this girl always had to be this... complicated.
"Cat, I think you have to explain it to me."
"Explain what?" Arghh, someday she's going to drive me crazy!
"This whole Tori-Beck thing we were talking about?" I said rather annoyed now.
"Oh... Uhm, we had a girls talk before the party. Tori said she doesn't know what's going on with her lately, because she feels bad when she sees Beck and Jade together. And when I said she loves him she was about to freak out."
"Um, what? I thought she had told you she's in love with him. You said she told you!"
"She didn't tell-tell me. But I'm sure she does love him. You should see the way she looks at him! Aaaand... they almost kissed earlier! Sooo..."
"WHAT?" God damn it, am I the only one who didn't notice anything?
"Yaah, it was so cute! They were dancing together! But then his phone rang and he left." She giggled and looked at me full of enthusiasm.
"What? Wait, Cat! You were watching them?" I was kinda shocked. God, I guess I use the word "what" way too often...
"Ahh, don't scream at me!" She shrieked and punched me softly in my arm.
"Man, I can't believe it!" I groaned and Cat giggled again. I didn't really know how I should feel about this. I wanted Tori to be happy and I felt really sorry for her because this whole Jade-thing preyed on her mind. Plus: I didn't even know why my best friend was dating such a... whatever you wanna call her. I couldn't stand her, she actually scared me (This stays between us, please!). If you asked me, Beck and Tori would make the perfect couple. I always thought there was something more between them until Jade showed up... And that was exactly the problem: What the hell was Beck thinking? He wasn't allowed to kiss Tori, he had a girlfriend. And... What if... No, he wouldn't play with her, that was something he just wouldn't do. Besides, he didn't even know she was in love with him, right? But then why did he want to kiss her? And where were they going right now? No, he wouldn't get into her pants! Beck wasn't like this... Damn it, why was I even thinking about this? Okay, dude, you shouldn't interfere, it's their business, right? Yah, it was, and moreover I was pretty sure I wasn't supposed to know about Tori's feelings before Cat had told me.
"Man, these are big news" I finally sighed and glanced at Cat who was still standing next to me and obviously couldn't stop giggling.
"Oh yaay, I love big news! What are we going to do with them?" She screeched excidetly clapping her hands together.
"Nothing, of course! Cat, were you even allowed to tell me about the talk you had with Tori?" The sudden guilt in her eyes affirmed my previous thought. Of course she wasn't. But there was nothing new about that she told their little secrets anyways. Accidently, of course.
"Oh" she suddenly whimpered "please don't tell her I told you! She said she would kill me and I don't want to be killed!"
"I won't tell her. But you have to promise you won't tell anybody else either! Not even Robbie! And especially not Beck! Or even worse Jade! This needs to stay between you and Tori... and inevitably me now..."
"I won't tell anybody" she agreed. I raised an eyebrow, but then I noticed the serious expression on her face and smiled.
"Good." Let's just hope she's going to keep her promise.
BECK'S POV
We left the party without telling anyone. I had put my arm around Tori's waist while we were walking to my car. It stood two streets away, so it took us some time to get there. Holding her so close was... nerve-wracking. In a good way, though. I could smell her fresh perfume and coconut shampoo as she wearily rested her head on my shoulder. It almost made me loose my mind. I really had to pull myself together to not forget everything around us and just kiss her. The helplessness and weakness she showed me somehow awakened my protective instinct. All I wanted was to hold her close and never let her go.
"Beck?" She suddenly whispered. I stopped walking and she backed off a few steps to face me. Our eyes met and I could feel my heart skip a beat. For god's sakeness, Beck! Pull yourself together! I didn't know why, but this effect Tori had on me has gotten even "worse" since Jade and I started dating. A single glance or a slight touch from her was enough to totally throw me. That wasn't normal anymore. And it was even worse that I more and more got the urge that I needed to tell her what I really felt for her. I just couldn't hide it anymore. And now, that we've been so close to kissing, I didn't even want to hide anymore.
"Yeah?" I finally asked. An uncertain smile appeared on her lips.
"What did Jade want?"
"Uhm, what?"
"When she called earlier..." She blushed a bit as if she was thinking of what almost had happened before Jade had interrupted us. I sighed. Jade was the last... thing... I wanted to talk about right now.
"You sure you wanna know this?" I replied and forced a smile. She just nodded and smiled back.
"Umm, okay. Well... She was... pretty mad because of the fight we had earlier and... yeah. She actually didn't really stop screaming. But that's just Jade's way to handle a fight, I guess. Whatever... she wanted me to come home, but I said no. Sooo... she started yelling at me again like how I would be a bad boyfriend and how I wouldn't care how she felt. And... stuff like that. Nothing new..." I decided to take a short break and looked at Tori. Her smile was gone and now she just met me with disbelief. Then she murmered something under her breath I couldn't understand.
"Sorry?" I digged deeper. Her cheeks got red and I couldn't stop myself from smiling at this sight. She looked so cute when she was blushing.
"I.." she replied shyly and stared at her feet "I don't think you're a bad boyfriend. I mean... I don't know it... but I'm pretty sure."
"Thanks" I whispered. As she looked up our eyes met again. I gave her a warm smile. There was this feeling in my stomach again. The same feeling I had before we had almost kissed. And I could see exactly the same sparkle in her eyes. I didn't even notice how I took a few steps towards her. My eyes rested on her and she just glanced back. You could almost see sparks fly. She slowly approached, wearing a shy smile on her face. Without knowing why I laid my hand on her cheek. Wait, what are you doing? Stop it, Beck! Don't kiss her! You can't do that! STOP IT! Now! That actually worked. Suddenly I forced myself to back off and cleared my throat. Nervously, I ran my hand trough my hair.
"Umm... We better go. It's getting cold... And... didn't you want to go home?" Wow. What an awkward excuse. She shot me a pretty confused look but nodded. I gave her a slight smile and put my arm around her again. As I touched her to pull her closer I could feel goosebumps on her skin. She rested her head on my shoulder again and I forced myself to act like nothing had happened. When we finally reached my car I opened the door for her and made her sit down. She murmered something that sounded like "thanks", then she immediately closed her eyes and sank down into the passenger seat. A slight smile crossed my lips when I carefully shut the door.
There was silence between us during our way home, but it wasn't awkward or uncomfortable. I actually felt kinda relieved that Tori didn't talk, I was too lost in my thoughts anyways. And keeping them under control while driving my best friend home – my best friend that I actually loved – was stressful enough. Not that I was complaining... Having Tori here right next to me was awesome. Well, okay, her state was anything but awesome, but who cared? It didn't matter what she had done, she was still wonderful to me. Something kept telling me that I should tell her how I felt. I didn't know why. Maybe it was because she had raised my hopes today by almost kissing me. And by saying she was sure that I wasn't a bad boyfriend. Damn it, she was drunk! No, she still is... kinda... And she can't stand Jade. She was just talking. And... She absolutely has no idea! If she only knew... - God damn it, I really am a bad boyfriend. I don't love Jade. It's Tori I really want.. And she doesn't even notice it. I sighed. Why had it always have to be complicated? What had I let myself in for?
We finally arrived at her house and I parked my car on the sideline. With a slight smile on my face I turned to Tori. She had leant her head against the window, her eyes were still closed. I stared at her for several seconds totally adoring what I saw. Then, as if I had suddenly become aware of what I was doing, I shook my head and cleared my throat.
"Tori?" I whispered. No reaction. "Hey, Tori?" I said again and nudged her carefully. No reaction. Was she asleep? Ugh, obviously she was. Damn. What now? I didn't want to wake her up, she looked so peaceful and cute when she was sleeping. And I knew how tired she was. But how should I handle this now? I had no idea how to get her into her room without getting attention or making a noise. But fine... why not giving it at least a try?
I didn't know how I managed that, but I somehow succeeded in carrying her to the front door without waking her up. Wow, that girl really had to be exhausted... Poor Tori, I should have kept an eye on her... Well, whatever, it was too late for that and I had a very different problem now. Where's this fucking key? Have you ever tried to find the latchkey while carrying a young lady and her bag in your arms? No? Well, don't try it, it won't work. Time for her to wake up, I guess...
"Sweetie" I whispered. She blinked and a smile appeared on my face. "You're home, Tori." She blinked again and finally opened her eyes. I could see confusion in them and as she noticed that I was still carrying her they widened even more. I immediately set her down carefully, not letting go of her arm.
"Oh... Already?" She replied still a bit confused. I nodded and she bit her lip. "Oh, okay. Where's my bag?" A grateful smile slipped from her lips when I gave it to her. It took her a while until she had found what she was looking for. With a satisfied expression on her face she showed me the key. "Got it!" She smiled.
"Do you want me to bring you upstairs?" I didn't know why I asked this and as soon as I did so I already regretted it. Damn, please don't let her getting this wrong. I really didn't have any other intetion than putting her to bed. She still seemed kinda... helpless. And I wanted to be sure that she was alright. But then... I was even more surprised when she answered.
"Yeah... If you don't mind." She smiled shyly and then turned around to unlock the door. Not a minute later we entered the house and quickly went upstairs. I almost jumped when she turned on the light.
"Do you think it's wise to turn on the light when your parents and Trina are sleeping?" I asked doubtfully, but she just shook her head. I raised an eyebrow which made her smile a bit.
"They aren't here. My parents are at my aunt's silver wedding and Trina's camping with some friends."
"Trina? Camping? Are we still talking about your sister?" She laughed quietly and nodded.
"There's this one guy she likes... so she thought she should take a chance and..." She shrugged.
"Oh. Wow, I feel sorry for that guy."
"Yah, me too." She smiled and then turned around to go to her room. I followed her with an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach. Awesome, her family was gone for the night and I had asked her to bring her to her room. God, how stupid was I? What was she thinking about me now?
"Um... Yeah, we're here" I said asininely when we finally entered her room. She nodded. I wanted to pull her into a hug to say goodnight, but she quickly walked over to her bed. What? She didn't even want to say goodbye? Without saying anything she let herself fall onto the mattress. I slowly approached and watched her hiding under the covers. A smile appeared on my face. "You are pretty tired, huh?" She just nodded and closed her eyes. I sat down on her bed and watched her for a few minutes. She looked beautiful and for the x-th time tonight I had to pull myself together to not lean down and give her a kiss. She burried her face in her pillow and I carefully brushed her hair out of her forehead. A slight smile appeared on her face as my hand rested on her cheek.
"Thanks Beck. For everything." She whispered into her pillow. I didn't answer, I just smiled and tenderly stroked her cheek. I didn't even know how long I kept on doing this. It just felt right and I didn't want this moment to stop. And it even was worse that Tori didn't do anything against it. Okay, she had probably fallen asleep, so she wasn't able to do anything. But... no, I had to stop it. All I wanted was to bring her to her room, right? It wasn't right for me to stay here watching her sleep.
After a while I finally forced myself to leave her alone.
"Good night, beautiful" I said and gave her a little kiss on the forehead. I stroked her cheek for a last time, then I stood up and turned around to finally leave. My heart skipped a beat when she suddenly grabbed my hand.
"Stay." It was barely more than a whisper. "Please!"
"Wh-what?"
"Don't leave me alone, Beck."
"But -"
"Please." She sounded weak. I slowly turned around and looked into her beautiful brown eyes. There was some sort of entreaty in her glance. A sigh slipped from my lips as I quickly broke eye-contact again. A voice inside my head kept telling me that I couldn't do that. I couldn't stay here, I needed to leave as soon as I could, otherwise I would loose my mind. I feared that I wouldn't be able to hold myself back any longer. And I didn't want to take advantage of Tori's state. She meant much more to me, I just couldn't do that. Even though I wanted to.
"Tori, I... I can't." I whispered trying to convince myself more than her. She shook her head and intertwined her fingers with mine.
"Just stay with me. Please! I don't want to be alone."
"But..." I breathed another sigh and slowly sat down on her bed again. She gave me this begging look and I knew she really meant it. She wanted me to stay here with her. And all of a sudden I gave up my resistance. The way she looked at me made me change my mind. I knew it was wrong, but I just couldn't help it. "Okay... Okay." I finally said and a slight smile appeared on her face.
"Thanks!"
"Anything for you" I replied which made her smile even brighter. She pulled me a bit closer and gave me a little peck on the cheek. Sighing, I laid down next to her and not a second later she snuggled against me. Without knowing why I turned my face to hers. God, what was I doing? This wasn't good! Not at all. But it just felt so right... I sighed, pulled her a bit closer and covered both of us with her blanket.
Not a minute later she fell asleep – for real, this time – with her head resting on my chest. I carefully stroked her hair and then took her hand. The slight smile on my face didn't want to go away and the beating of my heart just didn't want to come down. I could feel butterflies in my stomach again. How could someone be so beautiful?
"I love you, Tori" I whispered. I knew she couldn't hear me, but I didn't care. I just felt like I needed to say it.
